Who Do You Love? 10/20/2003
1 John 4:7-11
Along our journey here on this world we encounter different people to whom there are some that we like more than others. We might have a common interest. We might have the same opinions. We might like the way someone looks or their personality. Maybe something just clicked.
It took me a while to like my best friend. I met him and thought he was so ugly that his mom had to tie a bone around his neck to get their dog to play with him. But once I got to know him, we became best buds all through school.
I can remember the time that I met Chris. They had a surprise birthday party for him and Stu here at the church and we met and I knew right away that I liked him. It was the same way with Don Kinder when I met him at Mr. & Mrs. Coles 50th wedding anniversary. We clicked automatically. There are people that are personalities mesh and we bond instantly. That is not what I want to talk about today.
The truth of the matter is that the people that we are attracted to are the easy ones to love. But that is not what our text is talking about. I does not say, “We ought to love the ones that we like the best”. It does not say, “We ought to love the ones that love us first”. No it says that (vs. 11) Beloved, if God loved us, we also ought to love one another.
That is the hard part. Loving the ones we don’t mesh with. Loving the ones who persecute us. Loving the ones who have never done anything to deserve our love.
James 2:8, If you really fulfill the royal law according to the Scripture, You shall love your neighbor as yourself, you do well.
James knew it was not an easy task.
Romans 13:8, Owe no one anything except to love one another, for he who loves another has fulfilled the law.
This passage is not just talking about money. It is talking about respect and honor. It is stating that Love is a debt that is never paid in full.
Then it goes on in verses 9-10, For the commandments , You shall not commit adultery, You shall not murder, You shall not steal, You shall not bear false witness, You shall not covet, and if there is any other commandment, are all summed up in this saying, namely, You shall love your neighbor as yourself. Love does no harm to a neighbor; therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.
Plainly put, if you have love for others in you life you will take care of all those other commandments.
1 John 3:11, For this is the message that you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another.
From the fight of the first two brothers, the Bible has told us time and time again, over and over, love one another. One of the most emphasized commandments in the Bible. It was the top two when they asked Jesus.
Mathew 22:34-40
The first one is logical. It is easy to love God. Our actions may not show it, our attitudes may not display it, but with everything that he has done for us it is easy to love Him. It’s those other guys that are the tough part.
There are several reasons why we dislike each other.
Jealousy
You know the type. The ones with all the friends, all the looks, the perfect hair, with all the athletic ability and the book smarts. If I sound like I’m venting, I’m sorry.
But I’ve said before as a joke when God was handing out the brains, I thought He said trains and I said give me one with a red caboose. I always felt like I had to work harder in school and in athletics just to get by, while others it just came natural.
The same things happen within the church. “So and so got recognized for this and I did that and no one said anything”. Or “Can you believe that so in so was asked to do this or that and I’m the one more qualified.” This is a good one, “Look at that church directory, the same names doing all the jobs”.
Maybe no one else has volunteered to do them and out of love to God and the church they do the jobs. It is known that 10% of the people do 90% of the work in a church. Shame on us.
Hurt Feelings
This is the sly one. I have found out that I have hurt some ones feeling before and I never had any idea. This one will occur and unless the person comes and does what the Bible says in Matthew 18:15, “go and tell him”; you might not ever know it. I do it with my big mouth, not with intent to hurt, but not knowing when to keep my big mouth shut.
I guess that I’m so uses to messing up so much that I’m not to sensitive when someone points out my faults that it doesn’t bother me much. But others may be more sensitive and get their feelings hurt when you have a slip of the tongue.
It is easy to hold a grudge and like I’ve preached before. Our bodies are not designed to carry grudges.
Persuasion from others
This is a common one. We don’t like someone because someone we do like doesn’t like them. As silly as it sounds, it happens all the time. Instead of getting to know the person to make our own decision, we chose not to like them based on someone else’s opinion.
Or if one of our friends or family has a fight with someone then we are mad at them too without getting the story from both parties.
Misunderstandings
This one wins the frequent flyer award. This one pops its ugly head up all the time. People get upset or angry because of misunderstandings. We are all human. (I didn’t see any flying saucers parked outside). And to err is human. We all make mistakes. People get hurt. Something is said and taken with the wrong intent. Someone does something and hurts someone without any intent to do so. To err may be human but to forgive is divine.
Don’t share the same beliefs
This could be something as simple as some ones favorite driver or sports team. (Example; Marshall & WVU, Jeff Gordon or Dale Ernhart)
It could be some political issue. Do you know the two funeral homes we have here were based on weather you were a Demarcate or a Republican?
You can have people hate you because you hunt and they believe in animal rights.
Back in the 60’s, some of the most violent protest was caused by the people fighting for peace. Go figure.
And it doesn’t stop there. We do it with different religious beliefs. We do it with which translation of the Bible we use. (Example; when I became a Southern Baptist).
There are no denominations in Heaven.
But it all comes down to; we don’t like some one because of our differences in beliefs.
Different from ourselves
This can do with our skin color or our nationality. Jesus is colorblind. He sees no color. Now not to get off the subject, but our sexual preference. Homosexuality is a sin. Hate the sin but love the sinner. You may say potato and I say tator. Someone might have green spiked hair. Someone might have no hair.
We all are different. And our differences are by design. And God is our designer.
Can you imagine how boring it would be if all of us were just alike?
Just Don’t
And sometimes we don’t like someone and the only reason is that we just don’t. We all have met someone and they haven’t said anything to us, never did anything to us, but we simply don’t like them. I’m guilty and I’m sure many of us are.
So now that I’ve share some of the reasons why we don’t like one another and we all including myself have our toes saying ouch.
We as a church kind of set a new Christian up. This is one reason we may have difficulty “loving one another”. Because as Christians, we start out with the habit of receiving, not the giving of love.
We didn’t become Christians because we gave God our love. We became Christians because He first loved us. We receive His love. Then from the beginning of a person’s decision for Christ, the Church does the giving. (Or at least it should) We give them a hug and praise for their decision. We welcome them into our family. We hopefully teach and train them. We baptize them and it starts all over with the congratulations again. New believers receive and receive until it becomes the nature order for them. They begin to think this is the way it’s supposed to be. They could end up turning the statement that Jesus made, “Love one another as I have loved you” to say, “Love one another as they love you back”. And if they don’t love you back, all bets are off.
There once was a carpenter who didn’t over charge for doing finish work.
Once there was a man who healed the sick for free.
Once there was a man who fed people free of charge.
And do you know what they did to Him? They crucified Him.
My Point
There will be times that as a Christian that you’ll feel unappreciated and taken for granted. You’ll not feel as loved as you should be.
When that happens you should love others anyway. Why? Because Jesus said: “Love one another as I have love you”.
At times you are not going to be the receiver of love the way you would like to be. But God never called you to receive love from one another; it’s not in the scripture anywhere. God called you to love one another.
Plan and simply put we are to love one another. Why is found in verse 11.
Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.
Do we deserve His Love? I know I don’t. Even with the worst thing anyone has done to me, it’s doesn’t hold a candle to what I’ve done to Him. He loves me anyway. The only thing I deserve is Hell, and anything else I receive is grace.
If we would quit looking at each other and keep our hearts and minds focused on Him, we can love one other.
It all starts with loving Him. The more we love Him the easier it is to love others.
Little Chad was a shy, and quiet young fella. One day he came home and told his mother, he’d like to make a valentine for everyone in his class.
Her heart sank. She thought, "I wish he wouldn’t do that!" because she had watched the children when they walked home from school. Her Chad was always behind them. They laughed and hung on to each other and talked to each other. But Chad was never included. Nevertheless, she decided she would go along with her son. So she purchased the paper and glue and crayons. For three whole weeks, night after night, Chad painstakingly made
thirty-five valentines.
Valentine’s Day dawned, and Chad was beside himself with excitement! He carefully stacked his valentines up, put them in a bag, and bolted out the door. His mom decided to bake him his favorite cookies and serve them up warm and nice with a cool glass of milk when he came home from school. She just knew he would be disappointed -- maybe that would ease the pain a little. It hurt her to think that he wouldn’t get many valentines -- maybe none at all.
That afternoon she had the cookies and milk on the table. Then she heard the children outside & she looked out the window. Sure enough here they came, laughing and having the best time. And, as always, there was Chad in the rear. He walked a little faster than usual. She fully expected him to burst into tears as soon as he got inside. She noticed right away - his arms were empty, and when the door opened she choked back the tears.
"Mommy has some warm cookies and milk for you."
But he hardly heard her words. He just marched right on by, his face aglow, and all he could say was: "Not a one -- not a one."
Her heart sank.
And then he added, "I didn’t forget a one, not a single one!"
THAT’S THE KIND OF HEART WE NEED: The heart of the servant who has determined that in this world we will be like HIM.
