“Forgive One Another”
INTRODUCTION: Ephesians 4:31-32
Ephesians 4:31 - Last Sunday we looked at “bitterness” … WHY we are bitter … WHAT bitterness looks like … HOW to overcome bitterness.
TODAY we will look at one of the CAUSES of BITTERNESS. If we want to AVOID bitterness, it is essential that we learn how to FORGIVE. Ephesians 4:32 - Whenever someone hurts us, we choose to be either BITTER … or BETTER.
I. THE BASIS FOR FORGIVENESS
We have the idea that FORGIVENESS is accepting someone’s APOLOGY. Someone has WRONGED you … they APOLOGIZE … you ACCEPT their apology … they are FORGIVEN.
Like I mentioned last week, the word “apology” isn’t in the Bible. “Apologizing” isn’t a part of the forgiving process. It’s not a CONDITION for forgiveness.
We tend to put CONDITIONS on forgiveness. SOMETIMES, forgiveness IS conditional. John the Baptist preached a CONDITIONAL forgiveness - Mark 1:4 – “John the Baptist appeared in the wilderness preaching a baptism of repentance for the forgiveness of sins.” God looks for the fruit of repentance before He grants forgiveness of sins. If everybody was UNCONDITIONALLY forgiven, then everyone would go to Heaven … which we know is not the case.
Look at Ephesians 4:32 - “forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.” Paul isn’t talking about the TERMS of forgiveness here … conditional or un-conditional. Paul is talking about the ATTITUDE of forgiveness. We are to forgive others JUST LIKE Jesus has forgiven us.
We find this in the Lord’s Prayer – “And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who have trespassed against us.” JUST LIKE Jesus has forgiven you, so are you to forgive others.
SO .. the BASIS for our forgiving others, is on the BASIS that Jesus has forgiven you. On what BASIS did Jesus forgive you? He forgave you on the BASIS of His GRACE … on the BASIS of His LOVE … on the BASIS of MERCY.
II. THE EXAMPLE OF FORGIVENESS
Jesus gives us an illustration of how “forgiveness” works. It is a parable of contrast and comparison. Matthew 18:21-35 – all turn
18:21-22 – Peter must have had somebody offend him over and over again. Peter kept forgiving him … but he was getting tired of this man continually committing the same sin against him.
It’s 1 thing for someone to fool you once … or even twice. “Fool me once, shame on you … fool me twice, shame on me!” You can forgive someone who takes advantage of you (or lies, steals, cheats) once or twice. You can forgive them. But 7 TIMES? Peter thought he had gone above and beyond the call of forgiveness to forgive 7 times. He was proud of himself … he wanted Jesus to brag on him. Peter wanted to know if he had fulfilled his responsibility for forgiveness … he thought he had forgiven this jerk enough!
Jesus told Peter that he hadn’t even BEGUN to use up his allotment of forgiveness. “seventy times seven” … 490 … ACTUALLY, INDEFINITELY. By the time you forgive somebody for the same thing 20-30 times, you’ll lose count!
NOW, this doesn’t mean that it’s OK to let them keep cheating you over & over again. That’s not being “religious” … that’s being STUPID! What Jesus is telling us is that FORGIVENESS HAS NO LIMIT … it isn’t BASED on whether or not they DESERVE it … it’s BASED on the NEED for forgiveness.
Jesus gives a PARABLE to illustrate this.
18:23-24 – The King took an audit, and found 1 of His employees whose books were out of balance. 10,000 talents were missing. That’s a lot of money … a “talent” was 6,000 day’s wages … about 6 BILLION dollars. This businessman must have been in charge of a large government agency. LATER, we’ll see WHY Jesus uses such a large, astronomical figure.
18:25 – This amount was too much to pay back … IMPOSSIBLE to pay back all of it. In Bible times, a King could command that this man & his whole family be sold into slavery, and whatever he got for them would go towards paying his debt. If this were happen today, I’ll be there wouldn’t be as much credit card debt!
18:26 – The man gets down on his hands & knees and pleads with the King. He doesn’t ask that the debt be forgiven … only that he be given more time to see if he could come up with the money. Seeing the size of the debt, I’m not sure how he was going to do it.
18:27 – The King was full of mercy, and forgave the debt. This was MORE than the man had asked for (more time). The King went above & beyond … and set him free … no longer owing the money.
NOW … this is a picture of what God has done for you. You have a DEBT OF SIN so large that you could never pay it. You can’t be GOOD enough, RICH enough, RELIGIOUS enough, or SMART enough. Your sin debt is so huge that there is NO WAY you could ever pay what you owe God, to get you into Heaven. All it takes is 1 SIN to condemn you to eternal Hell … and we have a MILLION on God’s books.
We are so deep in debt that there’s NO WAY out … except for the grace, mercy and love of God. The King here represents God … who made a plan to have your sin debt paid for you, when He sent Jesus to the cross. God the Father took your sin, my sin … and placed them on Jesus. He looked at His Son Jesus, hanging on the cross … and said: “There’s no greater price that could be paid … there’s no greater payment that could be made … I’ll take it.” And God the Father will nail your sins to the cross, if you will but repent of them and trust Jesus to pay your sin debt.
BUT … that’s not ALL of the story.
III. THE HYPOCRISY OF FORGIVENESS
18:28-29 – The forgiven servant had money on the brain. He didn’t owe the King … but it made him think about somebody who owed him.
“100 pence” = 100 days wages … about $10,000 in our economy.
This man wanted what was coming to him … what was owed him. He wanted to collect his outstanding debt, so he threatens the man who hasn’t paid him.
NOTICE … that the man said to him exactly what he had said to the King … 18:29b cp. 18:26b. This should have set off a light bulb in his mind … made him remember the forgiveness granted to him by the King.
18:30 – He showed no mercy … he wouldn’t forgive the debt.
18:31 – Those that knew him couldn’t believe what was happening! They were appalled! How could he do such a thing, when he himself had just been treated so mercifully for the exact same thing?
18:32-33 – The King said: “Look at what I’ve done for you … shouldn’t you have done the same for somebody who was in your shoes?”
WHAT IS THE LESSON THAT JESUS IS TRYING TO CONVEY?
We look at the servant … and we can’t believe his actions. He’s an ungrateful, wretched, horrible excuse for a human being. It makes you ANGRY, doesn’t it?
CHRISTIAN, God has forgiven you for a debt that you couldn’t ever pay. NOW …How dare you not forgive someone who has sinned against you! It doesn’t matter WHAT they have done against you … it’s NOTHING in comparison to what you have done against GOD. AND … God has forgiven you!
God’s forgiveness has given you a home in Heaven … and has kept you from eternal torment in the pit of Hell. How can you NOT FORGIVE someone a measly earthly offense ($10,000) … when God has forgiven you an eternal debt ($6 Billion).
There’s NO COMPARISON between what God has done for you … and what God expects you to do for others.
When we refuse to forgive others, it must make God ANGRY.
18:34 – This isn’t saying that if we don’t forgive others that God will send us to Hell. It’s not talking about SALVATION … it’s talking about RELATIONSHIP – 18:35
Peter thought there was a LIMIT to forgiveness. Jesus tells us that OUR forgiveness for others is LIMITED only by the example of God’s forgiveness to you. AND … His forgiveness is UNLIMITED!
IV. THE NATURE OF FORGIVENESS
Forgiveness isn’t an OPTION. It’s not just a “good idea” … it’s not just a SUGGESTION. It’s a COMMANDMENT from God!
We aren’t to forgive on the basis of whether or not they “deserve” it … or whether or not they are “worthy” … or have “apologized” … or if you “choose” to. Forgiveness is BASED on God’s forgiving YOU.
See the example of Stephen – Acts 7:60 – Stephen didn’t have a warm fuzzy feeling for those people who were stoning him. He made a CHOICE … a DECISION to forgive.
Forgiveness is a DECISION. It’s a DECISION that God made on your behalf before you were ever born … before you ever committed your first sin. God didn’t forgive you because you DESERVED it … or because you “apologized” to Him. God forgave you because He CHOSE to.
Forgiveness is a CHOICE … it’s a DECISION. You are to forgive those who have wronged you … whether you “feel” like it or not … whether they “deserve” it or not. Forgiveness isn’t always EASY … BUT … not all of God’s commandments are EASY.
CONCLUSION:
Why would God COMMAND such a thing? It’s for YOUR BENEFIT. Without forgiveness, you’ll hold resentment & bitterness … you’ll carry a grudge … and it will shut you off from God’s blessings. Forgiveness will remove the heavy burden of bitterness that you’ve been carrying around … and give you rest & peace.
Forgiveness doesn’t come NATURALLY. That’s why you have to turn your resentment over to God.
Maybe you’ve been hurt by someone .. and you just can’t let it go. If you don’t give it over to God, it will affect not only your relationship with them … but your relationship with God.
You’ve experienced the grace and forgiveness of God. NOW … experience the grace of forgiving others. Forgive … because God has forgiven you.
STAND - PRAY
HANDOUT FOR DISTRIBUTION
“Forgive One Another”
INTRODUCTION: Ephesians 4:31-32 – UNFORGIVENESS, a cause of bitterness.
I. THE BASIS FOR FORGIVENESS
- Apologizing is not a basis or condition for forgiveness.
- We are to forgive others on the BASIS that Jesus has forgiven you … on the BASIS of grace, love and mercy.
II. THE EXAMPLE OF FORGIVENESS
- Matthew 18:21-22 - Peter thought he’d forgiven enough.
- Jesus teaches that forgiveness has no limit
- 18:23-24 – An audit revealed $6 Billion missing, which was impossible to pay back.
- 18:25 – A man & his family could be sold into slavery and the money put toward the debt.
- 18:26 – He pleads for time, not to have the debt forgiven.
- 18:27 – The King gave him more than he asked for – Ephesians 3:19-20.
- There is no way you could pay the sin-debt you owe God.
- God placed your sin-debt upon Jesus … Jesus paid the debt.
III. THE HYPOCRISY OF FORGIVENESS
- 18:28-29 – The man wanted to collect the debt owed him.
- 18:30 – He showed no mercy … like what was shown him.
- 18:31 – He was shown mercy … but he showed no mercy.
- 18:32-33 – How dare you not forgive someone who has sinned against you, when God has forgiven your greater sin-debt!
- When we refuse to forgive others, it makes God angry.
- 18:34-35 – This speaks of RELATIONSHIP, not SALVATION.
- There was no limit to God’s forgiveness … there should be no limit to your forgiveness of others.
IV. THE NATURE OF FORGIVENESS
- Forgiveness isn’t an option or a suggestion … it’s a COMMANDMENT from God.
- Forgiveness is based on God’s forgiving you – Acts 7:60
- Forgiveness is a DECISION, a CHOICE.
CONCLUSION: God commands forgiveness for YOUR benefit … or you will become bitter … and miss God’s blessings.
- Turn your resentment over to God … forgive, because God has forgiven you.
PRISCILLA BAPTIST CHURCH – Ray Scott, Pastor
