Honor Your Father and Your Mother
Some of us have a harder time feeling like honoring our parents because of past and present abuses. Yet, God did not make a mistake in giving us the parents we have. Evidence of that is giving by the truth in Psalm 139:
"You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body, and knit them together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!.......You were there while I was being formed in utter seclusion! You saw me before I was born andscheduled each day of my life before I began to breathe. Every day was recorded in your Book! How precious it is, Lord, to realize that you are thinking about me constantly! I can’t even count how many times a day your thoughts turn towards me. And when I waken in the morning, you are still thinking of me!"
(verses 13-18)
With that truth I can thank God for my parents, but particularly for my Dad. Because of the sovereignty of God, He gave me a choleric father who is very demanding, authoritative and dictatorial. I have learned that adult children are not asked to be subservient to domineering parents. We are not expected to or commanded to disobey God to obey parents. Our responsibility is to honor our parents which means to respect and to love. Recently, I honored my Dad by showing respect, love and service as well as witness of the salvation found in the saving faith in the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and God blessed me in many wonderful ways.
Now I can understand, accept and fully obey the command that comes from Ephesians 6:1-3:
"Children, obey your parents; this is the right thing to do because GOD has placed them in authority over you. Honor your father and mother. This is the first of God’s Ten Command-ments that ends with a promise. And this is the promise: that if you
honor your father and mother, yours will be a LONG life, full of blessing." (Ephesians 6:1-3 Living)
When you look up the Hebrew meaning for the word "LONG" you will find that it is defined as meaning:
Rectitude...straight, honest, upright and true...
And when we see what the word "honor" means, we find that it is the same word used by Jesus in John 8:49 when he said he honored His Father:
to prize, value, revere, respect and love
We need to remember the first command that guarantees a promise of blessings. If we can’t obey thefirst commandment given to us as children, how will we ever obey the rest? God’s commands are for us good spiritually, emotionally, socially, mentally, economically and physically as well as in every other dimension of life. He wants to bless us so we can be a blessing to others.
Honor: Show me the man you honor and I will know what kind of man you are.
Thomas Carlyle.
Was this going to be easy? Absolutely not! I questioned God: How could I forgive, prize, value and revere someone like my father. The Lord spoke to me, "Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." (Rom. 12:21)
God said to me, In the way I forgive you you are also to forgive and put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with one another, forgive one another just as Christ has forgiven you for the greater glory of God. (Eph. 4:28-32) You can do all things through the strength, love, power, wisdom, enablement, enlightenment, empowering, equipping, and enriching that I give you through my word and Spirit.
Now I see that only when I release, relinquish and cast my hurts on to the Lord can He heal, restore and transform me. The Lord wants to teach me greater, higher and more creative ways to grow in Christ likeness by using my sand-paper father to refine me into His image. Just as God used my father in the past and in the present so he will use him in the future for His greater purposes that are above my ability to understand at the time. I am also trusting that God will use this love shown to my father to bring him to a saving knowledge and personal relationship with Jesus Christ as His Savior and Lord. Please pray to that end.
1. We all have a continual choice to make between becoming bitter or better. I choose to be better with every situation as I know that God works all things together for good for those of us who love God and are called according to His purposes - the purpose of becoming more like HIs Son - Jesus Christ. (Rom. 8:28,29) Too many of us read verse 28 without realizing that the good He is working is the transforming us more into Christlikeness.
2. Let us do all we can to show respect and honor to our parents so God may bless, enrich and make our ways straight. Without this attitude, action and relationship to our parents our lives will not experience the fullness they could have. God gave you the parents He knew were exactly right for you. The Lord knew the training you needed in the past, present and future that only your unique parents could provide. Thank Him for being all knowing, all powerful and sovereign in His selection. Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, be kind to everyone and in everything give thanks for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. (I Thes. 5:15-18)
3. This does not mean that you have to reward bad behavior and refuse to set boundaries for abuse. But it does mean that you need to honor the position, role and office of your parents. As you are faithful in these things God will make you faithful over much. (Luke 16:10)
4. Perhaps you need to ask God for forgiveness for not honoring your mother or father. If you expect to be healthy and to be healed of what is wrong in your life physically, emotionally, mentally or spiritually, get reconcilied with your father and mother. If there is something wrong with your relationship with your earthly father it may hinder your more important relationship with your heavenly Father.
5. Unless you reconcile, re-configure and redirect yourself to honoring your parents you might suffer from discouragement, anger or unnecessary anxieties. God requires us to obey in order to be blessed. Failure in any one area will reverberate to other dimensions and relationships in our lives. Let us love, His liberty and the laws of His ten commandments set you free.
6. You may not feel that your parents deserve to be honored, but we need to trust and obey God’s word regardless of our feelings. Do all you can to prize, revere and value your parents so that God may be please with you in all ways. Do it as to the Lord and you will receive the reward of your inheritance. Ultimately, it is the Lord Jesus Christ you are serving and not men. (Col. 3:23,24)
7. Many of the problems in our society, especially among the youth result from disobedience to their parents and failure to honor them. Many have embarked on lifestyles of self-loathing, self-destruction and selfish living because they failed to honor their parents with their lives.
8. People who are not living blessed lives,
nor are they living straight, honest, upright lives are often guilty of failing to honor their parents.
9. Listen to what God’s word says in Malachi 4:5,6: "See, I will send you another prophet like Elijah before the coming of the great and dreadful judgment day of God. His preaching will bring fathers and children together again, to be of one mind and heart, for they will know that if they do not
repent, I will come and utterly destroy their land." Malachi 4:5,6
10. If you are not living a totally blessed life it may be because you are not fully obeying God’s commands to honor your parents. If you feel that you may be one of these, forgiveness, grace and strength is yours for the asking.
Worship the Lord with the beauty of His holiness and obedience and love from a pure heart, a good conscience and a sincere faith. (2 Tim. 1:5)
