Have you ever been in a situation where you needed to call someone for help in the middle of the night, at a time when you knew they would be fast asleep in bed? Perhaps a medical emergency of some kind – your wife is going into labor, or your husband is having chest pains and you need to drive him to the hospital. Who did you call? And if you’ve never been in that situation, ask yourself – who would you call? Most of us have family in the area, and that’s probably who you would think of first. Your parents; or one of your grown children; or perhaps a brother or sister. But imagine that you have no relatives nearby. What friend could you call on for help at three a.m., confident that he or she would gladly respond to your request for help? What friend could you get out of bed, knowing that they wouldn’t grumble or complain, but would be more than willing to meet your need? Do you have a friend like that? I hope so. I hope there are several people here in this congregation that you could call if the need arose. About a year and a half ago, Charlene and I faced that, when I had a kidney stone attack late one night. If you’ve ever had a kidney stone – and if you haven’t, I don’t recommend it – you know that the pain is excruciating. We had to get to the hospital. But we needed someone to come stay with the children. And so we called the assistant pastor, who was also a friend. Because we knew he would have no hesitation in coming to our aid, regardless of the hour.
Well, today’s Scripture text is about a man who needed help in the middle of the night, and it teaches us some important things about calling upon God in prayer.
5Then he said to them, "Suppose one of you has a friend, and he goes to him at midnight and says, ’Friend, lend me three loaves of bread, 6because a friend of mine on a journey has come to me, and I have nothing to set before him.’
7"Then the one inside answers, ’Don’t bother me. The door is already locked, and my children are with me in bed. I can’t get up and give you anything.’ 8I tell you, though he will not get up and give him the bread because he is his friend, yet because of the man’s boldness he will get up and give him as much as he needs.
9"So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 10For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.
11"Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? 12Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? 13If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!" – Luke 11:5-13
When it comes to prayer, there are basically two things that concern us. The first is finding the motivation to pray; persuading ourselves that it’s worth the effort to actually do it. Because prayer – and here I’m talking about real prayer, prayer that expects a result, prayer that is willing to wrestle with God until he blesses you – prayer is costly. It takes time. It requires discipline and perseverance. And so, merely believing in prayer in some abstract, theoretical sense won’t cut it. That kind of belief won’t get you out of bed early in the morning to meet with God before work. It’s not strong enough to drag you away from the television in the middle of "CSI", so that you can intercede in prayer for your children. And it certainly won’t bring you out to church for a prayer meeting. In order for us to be committed to prayer, not just as a nice idea, but as something we actually practice, we must be convinced that it really does matter, that it really does make a difference whether or not we pray.
We need to believe that prayer changes things; that it’s more than just an exercise in wishful thinking. Otherwise, even if we believe we ought to pray, and even if we sincerely intend to pray, we won’t pray. And when you think about it, why should we? Why should someone get up early, or miss their favorite television program, or attend another meeting at the church, to do something that doesn’t really matter? So the first thing I want to show is that because of God’s attitude toward us, we can pray with absolute confidence that He hears us and will respond to our requests. Then second, once we’ve determined that prayer matters, we’ll look at how to go about it.
As we consider this passage in Luke, the first thing we notice is that God is portrayed as a frien, as someone you can call on for help in the middle of the night. Thankfully, God is a much better friend than the man in the story. That man is initially unwilling to provide any help at all, and only relents because of the repeated appeals of his friend standing outside. It reminds me of the way I respond when my youngest son comes to me asking for a snack, usually a granola bar. I say "No. It’s too close to supper." But to him, that’s merely my initial bargaining position. And so, he will beg, and cajole, and plead, and argue, and wheedle, and list all the reasons why he should have a granola bar, why it is entirely proper for him to have a granola bar, until finally my eyes glaze over, and I say, "Fine. Whatever. Just go away." Now, most of the time, I hold firm, and don’t give in. In fact, most of the time, I don’t even let him get started. But if I’m distracted, or tired, or if he manages to come up with some creative or amusing argument in favor of granola bar consumption, then in a moment of weakness, I may yield. And he knows that. He knows there’s at least a chance that if he persists, he will get what he wants. And for him, that chance is enough to make the quest worth while.
In the parable, we see that the so-called "friend" can’t be troubled even to get out of bed and unlock the door. He would prefer that the traveler go hungry, and that his friend be embarrassed at having nothing to feed him, rather than that he himself should be inconvenienced in any way. And it’s only because of the persistence of this fellow banging on his door and calling out for help in the middle of the night that he finally agrees to grant the request.
But God isn’t like that. He’s glad to help us. The point Jesus is making is this: if even someone who doesn’t want to help you will eventually grant your request, just to get rid of you, how much more should you expect that God will respond favorably when you come to him in prayer. Because, unlike the man in the story, God is not selfish, or uncaring, or indifferent to our needs. He is not hostile to our requests. He is not an enemy or a stranger, but a good friend – someone who is favorably inclined toward us; someone who is predisposed to help us. He is not unwilling, but is more than willing to provide for our needs – no matter what time of day it is. God is a true friend, a faithful friend who will never fail us. Listen to these verses.
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. . . Until now you have not asked for anything in my name. Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete." – John 15:13-14, 16:24
"You are forgiving and good, O Lord, abounding in love to all who call to you . . . In the day of my trouble I will call to you, for you will answer me." – Psalm 86:5-7
"The Lord is righteous in all his ways and loving toward all he has made. The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them." – Psalm 145:17-19
The Scriptures tell us that God’s attitude toward us is one of love and benevolence, friendship and favor. And so we can pray with confidence, knowing that he welcomes our prayers, knowing that he will respond to our cries for help. So ask yourself: Do you really believe that, deep down in your heart? Do you see him, not only as a faithful friend, who is ready to come to your aid at any time, but also as a loving Father, who delights in giving good things to his children? The answer to that question will greatly determine whether your prayer life is a delight or a drudgery. In fact, it will probably determine whether you have much of a prayer life at all.
Now, before we go on to the second point, I’d like to insert a bit of a parenthesis. Because whenever we talk about the blessings and benefits of the Christian life, it’s good to remember where they come from; to remind ourselves of why we are able to enjoy them. And that’s because of Christ. We can now experience God’s love, and benevolence, and favor only because Christ broke down the barrier of sin that separated us from him. Jesus Christ died for our sin; he was judged, and condemned, and punished in our place, in order to appease God’s wrath toward us and thereby reconcile us to God. As Paul teaches in Colossians 1:21,
"Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior. But now he has reconciled you by Christ’s physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation" – Colossians 1:21
Let’s move on now to the question of how we should pray. What does the passage in Luke teach us about that? I’d like to note two things. First, note that the man was persistent. When his first request was refused, he didn’t give up. He repeated his request again and again, until he finally received what he needed. And we should do the same thing. We should continue to bring our needs to God, persisting in prayer, until we either receive what we ask for, or God changes our desires.
Now, at first glance that may seem inconsistent. I just said that God is a friend who is ready and willing to help us; a father who delights in giving good things to his children. If that’s the case, then why do we need to ask over and over, as if he had to be persuaded to help us? That’s a good question. And the answer is that the purpose of prayer is not to inform God of what we need. If that were the case, then after we had simply stated the request once, we would be done. We would have communicated the information, and there would be no reason to repeat it. But God already knows what we need. He doesn’t need us to pray in order to find out what’s going on in our lives. And therefore, the purpose of prayer is not to transmit information. The purpose of prayer, or at least one of the purposes of prayer is to reveal what’s in our hearts, and to strengthen the faith of those who believe. That’s why He desires for us to persist in prayer. Let me explain what I mean.
Suppose that someone offers up a prayer to God. Now remember, what honors and pleases God is faith. Does this person have faith? Not necessarily. People say prayers for all sorts of reasons. Maybe they’re just covering the bases; trying anything that might possibly work. And so they give prayer a shot. If they don’t have faith in God, they’re going to give up relatively quickly. If they don’t really believe that God answers prayer, then they’re not going to persevere in prayer. Their lack of persistence reveals that they were never really trusting God in the first place.
For the believer, God requires persistence in prayer for a different reason: to test and strengthen our faith. How does that work? Every time we pray without getting an immediate result, we have a choice to make. Am I going to keep praying, or am I going to conclude that God isn’t listening and give up? In effect, God is asking us, "do you really believe in me? Are you really relying on me, and me alone? Or do you have a backup plan for getting what you want, just in case I don’t come through?" And every time we decide, at that point, to persevere in prayer instead of giving up and trying something else, our faith grows a little bit. It grows deeper, and stronger, and more resilient. Now, you might think that the way for God to build our faith would be immediately answer our prayers. But if that’s how God worked in our lives, it wouldn’t create a strong faith; it would create a shallow, easily discouraged faith. The first time we didn’t get what we asked for right away, we’d be tempted to abandon the Christian life altogether. No, what builds a strong, deep, lasting faith, a faith that can weather disappointment and discouragement, is the experience of choosing to believe God and keep praying, even when the answer doesn’t come on our timetable. Listen to these verses:
"we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope." – Romans 5:2-3
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." – James 1:3-4
If God always answered our prayers right away, there would be no need for perseverance. But according to these Scriptures, perseverance is what builds Christian character, and maturity, and hope. And so, because God desires those things for us, as his beloved children, he sometimes delays his answers to prayer to enable us to develop perseverance, and everything that goes with it.
Second, we see that the man asking for help openly acknowledges his need. He doesn’t try to hide the extent of his poverty, or pretend that he needs only a bit of assistance. No, he confesses that he is absolutely destitute. Look at verse six: "a friend of mine on a journey has come to me, and I have nothing to set before him." In other words, he is utterly dependent on his friend to help him. If the friend doesn’t come to his aid, he will go hungry.
Let me ask you: are your prayers like that? Is that your attitude, that your only hope of goodness and blessing is for the Lord to grant your petition? More fundamentally, do you see the Lord as the source of every good thing in your life; so that without Him, your life would be empty of goodness? Or is he for you a "God of the gaps," just a God who fills in the things which you can’t provide for yourself, or can’t obtain in some other way. Do you look to him as the source for absolutely everything you need and desire? Or do you seek him out only as a last resort?
What I’m getting at here goes beyond just the question of how we pray. It goes to the heart of our world view, our fundamental approach to life. Are we seeking our joy, and fulfillment, and happiness, and satisfaction in God, and God alone? Are we looking to him to meet our deepest needs? Do we hunger and thirst for God; do we long for him, and yearn for him, and desire him above all else? Or do we mainly desire and seek after the things of this world, and turn to God only when those don’t fully satisfy? Listen to how David described his longing for God:
"As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God." – Psalm 42:1-2
"Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." – Psalm 73:25-26
Do those verses resonate with you? Does that express how you feel about God? If so, then you are probably already someone who prays. But if you don’t pray, perhaps it’s because it’s not really God, or his blessings, that you want. Perhaps you’re satisfied with what you have, and you don’t realize that God isn’t in it. Listen to what Christ said to the Laodiceans,
"You say, ’I am rich; I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing’ But you do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked." – Revelation 3:17
People who pray do it because, like the man in the parable pleading for bread, they are desperate. They aren’t satisfied with the things of this world. They know that without God, they will be utterly destitute of what is truly good. What they need and desire most can’t come from any other source. They covet God’s blessings, but even more than that, they long for Him. They long to know Him, and fellowship with Him, and experience Him. And that can only come through prayer. So here’s my appeal. And I’ll close with this. Brothers and sisters, if we desire to see in our marriages, and our families, and our children merely what man can do – if we’re satisfied with that – then we don’t need to pray. But if we desire what only God can do, then we must pray for our children, and for our families, and for our marriages. Will you do that? And if we want for this church merely the things that man can accomplish, then we don’t need to pray. But if we long to see in this church what only God can accomplish, then we must pray for the church. Will you do that?
