My mother was a Wenger.
Her great-grandparents migrated from Basel, Switzerland, to Ontario, Canada, in 1835. Seventeen years later they chose to move to Iowa. They traveled in a covered wagon and just before they crossed the border into the U.S. someone stole all their clothing. All they had left was what was on their backs.
They had 10 children, one of whom was my great-grandfather Joseph who chose to stay in Iowa until he died at age 79 from a disease called “grip.” He and his wife had 11 children. When he died the newspaper said “Joe Wenger did not bother his head much about politics or affairs of state, but he taught his children honesty, industry, and good conduct, and he lived to see the fruits and labors that were well nurtured and flourishing. He was a fine man. His only diversion was attendance at the Amish church of which he was a lifelong member. A splendid, faithful, and worthy man has gone to his reward.”
One of those 11 children was my grandfather Ed. He and his 3 brothers were all farmers. Together they decided to buy a large steam engine and threshing machine and kept quite busy during the summer. This meant long days of dust, heat and hard work. However, there were compensations. Since the job involved a large number of farmers, there was a spirit of neighborliness and visiting which added interest to the task.
Ed chose to marry Elizabeth. Their first baby died of diphtheria at seven months. They themselves were placed under quarantine for 6 weeks and not allowed to leave home. My mother was born after two older sisters, before a younger brother. They all had to work at home and none of them was able to go to high school even though they wanted to. As a young person, my mother said that when she had a son she wanted to call him Richard. She didn’t know then that all 4 of her children would have that name.
There are now more than 800 living descendants in this Wenger clan. For 50 years, this large family got together every summer for a reunion in a large shelter house at the fairgrounds. I remember the long tables of food, meat and sandwiches at one end and yummy desserts at the other. The next best thing to the good food was the fun we had playing with the cousins, telling stories, & arguing about cars and tractors, while the adults caught up with each other’s families, farming operations, and other things. But we always came in for the program because it always included Lucy who was almost blind, but she could play the accordion very well.
This year, the Wengers will not re-une. The person in charge of the reunion asked people about their interest and it didn’t seem strong enough to continue. Of course, the Wengers are scattered all over the globe now and even those close by have been voting with their feet for a long time.
It is not easy for families these days. I suppose lots of things made it seem right to discontinue the Wenger family reunion, including the fact that people like myself haven’t been there in many years. But even on a smaller scale, lots of things seem to work against strong family relationships.
• Recent news has not been good for families. Last week a mother killed two children. The story of Laci Peterson’s death is in the news again. We hear of child abuse, spouse abuse, and abuse of the elderly. And in yesterday’s local paper five more divorces were announced.
• Even though everybody knows that divorce makes things more difficult for kids, it has become easier to get in some places. In Lincoln County, Wash., couples don’t need to appear before a judge. All they need to do is just write a letter to the judge.
• Parental supervision is a problem. A leading expert on family life says we have trouble minding our children. Kids come home from school to find no one there. They identify with their peer group, often leading to unwholesome activities. And school teachers complain that parents don’t take responsibility for their children.
• Employers put the bottom line at the top of their priority and don’t seem to care about families, asking workers to put in 12-hour days or to work over holidays, leaving little time for parents to be with their families.
• And television movies ridicule traditional family values.
May is family month. We all recognize the necessity of strong families. We all want families that stay together, play together, and pray together. Everyone has a part: children, parents, grandparents, uncles & aunts. There are choices we can make to strengthen family relationships:
• Appreciating. Let family members know they are important to you.
• Bonding: Spend time together. One father told me last week that his 9-year-old eagerly looks forward to family night, the one night a week they schedule.
• Communicating-talking openly. When you disagree, point to the problem rather than to the person or ignoring it.
The Bible underscores the importance of the family. In Deuteronomy, worship, rituals, obedience to God –all assume a family context. In fact, the whole story of salvation is about a long line of families. We’ve already seen the frequency of words such as ancestors, children, and descendants in the book of Deuteronomy.
Deut. 26 outlines a worship event. Look closely at the response in vv.5-10. These people would never have made it to the land God promised if God had not done a special work in their ancestors. The word “wandering” means not only an uncertain path, but it includes the idea of perishing, not far from death. Every family line is just one generation away from extinction. But look at what happened. There were some choices they made and some actions God took.
• V. 5 Jacob chose to go to Egypt (otherwise he would have died)
• v. 8. God brought us out of Egypt
• v. 9 God brought us into this place
• Response: v. 10 So now I bring the first of the fruit of the ground.
Every one here today is part of a family. All of you have ancestors. I don’t know how far back you can trace your family. Some wise guy has said there is some sap in every family tree! As you think about your family history, you may be able to go back several generations. On the other hand, some of you may not even know who your blood relatives are. But, two things are clear.
• Your ancestors made choices which resulted in life for you.
• God made it possible not only to be part of a family tree, but he made it possible for you to be here today.
Keep in mind that it could have been different. In 1944, a 41-year-old woman sought an abortion from her doctor. He refused, asserting that abortion was just not right, morally, ethically, or legally. The woman later gave birth to a baby boy. This unwanted child grew up to become a well-known evangelist. God has a plan for every human life, even those who are not wanted.
I ask you to reflect on how it happens you are here today. What part did you have? What part did others have? What part did God have? Who chose life for you?
Two weeks ago, I told you that my parents had wanted to be missionaries, but could not. Their prayer was that one of their children would take their place on the mission field. Ten years after we went to Japan as missionaries, my mother wrote me a letter on my 33rd birthday, saying they had named me Wesley in the hope that I would be a missionary as John and Charles Wesley had been. And I never knew it! I thank God for the part my parents had in choosing life for me and for those who follow after me.
Deut. 30:19 says, “Choose life so that you and your descendants may live….” These chapters at the end of Deuteronomy record the last of three sermons from Moses. After their long journey from Egypt through the wilderness, the children of Israel are almost ready to enter the promised land. It has taken 40 years to get here and these are not the same people who left Egypt and made a covenant with God. It is a new generation. So Moses gathers them for worship to renew their promise to serve the God who delivered them. Moses set before them the blessings of obedience. (See 28:1ff) Moses warned what would happen if they disobey. (28:15ff. Esp v.59)
The Israelites have come to a decision point. They had to make up their minds about obeying God. Obedience leads to life; disobedience leads to death. In 30:19, Moses urges them to choose life. We can understand the need to choose. We make choices every day –where to go, what to do, how much to eat, how to treat people, when to worship. These choices might make us happy or sad, sick or well, rich or poor. We might think that the choices I make are my problem. But there is more.
Did you notice that at every turn, Moses makes clear that the decision they make affect not just themselves but their children, grandchildren, and all their descendants. It is clear that the family is at the center of God’s work. (29:10ff & 30:19,20)
What might that mean for us today? I’ve already asked you to think about the choices your ancestors made and how those choices have affected you. Now I want you to think about how your decisions today will affect members of your family tomorrow and in the generations to come, no matter your age today. I want to make some suggestions about how you can choose life, not just so that you can live, but so that your descendants can also live.
1. Faith. First and foremost is a decision to follow Jesus. That is not a decision that is difficult and far away. As 30:11ff says, you don’t have to orbit the earth or cross the ocean to find it. God’s word and his opportunity are close by. If you think these words sound familiar, look in Romans 10: 6-10. That decision will change your life and the lives of people who come after you. Often I have heard people say that the committed life of their mother or father has followed them through life. Last week someone said, “I look at my mother I wish I could have a faith like hers.” Your decision to follow Jesus will affect members of your family.
2. Commitments. Learn to make commitments and keep them. There is nothing more disappointing than someone who promises one thing and does another. I have talked with kids whose parents have promised them something and when the time came, they reneged. Lots of children suffer from unkept promises. If parents only realized how that betrayal of trust impacts their kids, they would think twice. Family relationships are built on trust. People tell me all the time, “I’ll be in church Sunday,” but they don’t show up. It got so bad with one guy, I told him, “Look. Tell me after you have been here!” If you have promised your children something, do it. If you have promised your husband or wife that you would be faithful, do it. If you have promised to follow Jesus, do it. Keeping your commitment will impact the generations after you.
3. Lifestyle. Do you realize that what you eat and drink and the way you take care of yourself will affect the generations that come after you? We have no guarantees about length of life, but we know that some behaviors and some lifestyles can shorten your life and the shorter your life, the less opportunity you have to influence the next generation. We know, for example, that the risk of some forms of cancer can be reduced if we change our diet or stay out of the sun. We know that the risk of some cancers increases if we smoke. We know that the risk of accidental death is higher if we use alcohol. Life is a gift. Do what you can to protect and prolong it.
Deut. 30:19 says, “Choose life so that you and your descendants may live….”
Some people say that what they do is their business. Some even say that doing drugs is a personal choice and doesn’t hurt anyone else. But the Bible says that both sinning and living righteously have social and family consequences. Romans 14:7 says “We do not live to ourselves and we do not die to ourselves.”
What are you doing to choose life for your family and for those who follow you?
