How to Pick your Friends to Influence People
Mark 3:13-19
INTRODUCTION
Earl C. Willer tells the story of two men who grew up best friends:
Though Jim was just a little older than Phillip and often assumed the role of leader, they did everything together. They even went to high school and college together.
After college they decided to join the marines. By a unique series of circumstances they were sent to Germany together where they fought side by side in one of history’s ugliest wars.
One sweltering day during a fierce battle, amid heavy gunfire, bombing, and close-quarters combat, they were given the command to retreat. As the men were running back, Jim noticed that Phillip had not returned with the others. Panic gripped his heart. Jim knew if Phillip was not back in another minute or two, then he wouldn’t make it.
Jim begged his commanding officer to let him go after his friend, but the officer forbade the request, saying it would be suicide.
Risking his own life, Jim disobeyed and went after Phillip. His heart pounding, he ran into the gunfire, calling out for Phillip. A short time later, his platoon saw him hobbling across the field carrying a limp body in his arms.
Jim’s commanding officer upbraided him, shouting that it was a foolish waste of time and an outrageous risk. "Your friend is dead," he added, "and there was nothing you could do."
"No sir, you’re wrong," Jim replied. "I got there just in time. Before he died, his last words were ’I knew you would come.’"
T.S. One of the most precious gifts we have in our lives is the development of friendships and relationships with others. Friendships can bring joy or heartache. And they should not be entered into lightly.
In 1936 Dale Carnegie wrote his book on friendship and leadership How to Win Friends and Influence People. It is still required reading in many business courses and leadership classes.
Jesus surrounded himself with 12 very close friends. He experienced hardship with them, and joy with them, and he even experienced betrayal from one of them.
Jesus is our model if we truly want pick the type of friends that will help us be all that God wants us to be.
T.S. TURN WITH ME TO MARK 3:13-19
Jesus Chooses the Twelve Apostles
13Afterward Jesus went up on a mountain and called the ones he wanted to go with him. And they came to him.14Then he selected twelve of them to be his regular companions, calling them apostles. He sent them out to preach,15and he gave them authority to cast out demons.16These are the names of the twelve he chose:
Simon (he renamed him Peter),
17James and John (the sons of Zebedee, but Jesus nicknamed them "Sons of Thunder"),
18Andrew,
Philip,
Bartholomew,
Matthew,
Thomas,
James (son of Alphaeus),
Thaddaeus,
Simon (the Zealot),
19Judas Iscariot (who later betrayed him).
T.S. Our relationship with God is dramatically impacted by the friends choose.
ƒt IF WE ARE TO FULFILL GOD¡¦S PLAN FOR OUR LIVES WE MUST GIVE CAREFUL CONSIDERATION TO HOW WE PICK OUR FRIENDS
We must learn . . .
I. PICK OUR FRIENDS SERIOUSLY
In America today nearly half of all adults no longer even have time for friendships.
In his book Bowling Alone, Robert Putman says the following statistics are indicators of the decline in community life in America over the past 25 years:
Attending club meetings: down 58%
Family dinners: down 33%
Having friends over: down 45%
„X But Jesus gives considerable time to the choose and development of 12 close relationships
13Afterward Jesus went up on a mountain and called the ones he wanted to go with him. And they came to him.
A. Matter for prayer
Luke 6:12-13
12 One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to God. 13 When morning came, he called his disciples to him and chose twelve of them, whom he also designated apostles:
NIV
B. Matter for deliberation
Significant time has expired before Christ calls his apostles. Some scholars believe that as much as a year has gone by.
Luke 6, Matt 10
Appl: Most people happen onto their friends, they live close by. They work at the same place, they went to the same school. Just because you live next to someone doesn¡¦t mean they will make a great friend.
How serious do you take you friends. Are praying for good friendships? Are giving thought to what type of friend you need to have in yo0ur life right now so that you can fulfill God¡¦s plan for you?
II. PICK OUR FRIENDS CAREFULLY
A. There is benefit in numbers
B. There is benefit in diversity
1. Simon --
„X Leader Writes two epistles
„X Failure
„X Married 1 Cor 9:5
„X According to tradition he died crucified upside down, believing the was not worthy to die as Christ did.
2. James
„X Boldness ¡V son of Thunder
„X Spirited
„X First Martyr of the Apostles Acts 12:1-2
3. John
„X Boldness
„X Love
„X Faithfulness
4. Andrew
„X Common Sense
„X Keen Perception
„X Persuasive character
According to the Gospel of John, Andrew and an unnamed friend were among the followers of John the Baptist (John 1:35-40). When John the Baptist identified Jesus as the Lamb of God, both he and Andrew followed Jesus (John 1:41). Andrew then brought his brother Simon to meet the Messiah (John 1:43-51)-an action that continues to be a model for all who bring others to Christ.
At the feeding of the 5,000, Andrew called Jesus’ attention to the boy with five barley loaves and two fish (John 6:5-9). Later Philip and Andrew decided to bring to Jesus the request of certain Greeks for an audience with Him (John 12:20-22). Andrew is mentioned a final time in the gospels, when he asked Jesus a question concerning last things in the company of Peter, James, and John (Mark 13:3-4).
According to tradition, Andrew was martyred at Patrae in Achaia by crucifixion on an X-shaped cross.
5. Philip
„X Practical
„X Approachable
„X Team Player John 12:20-22
Philip’s Greek name implies he had Greek connections, and this is strengthened by the fact that he acted as the spokesman of the Greeks at the Passover.
Philip, versed in the Scriptures (compare John 1:45), appealed more to the critical Nathanael and the cultured Greeks.
Cautious and deliberate himself, and desirous of submitting all truth to the test of sensuous experience (compare John 14:8), he concluded the same criterion would be acceptable to Nathanael also (compare John 1:46). It was the presence of this materialistic trend of mind in Philip that induced Jesus, in order to awaken in His disciple a larger and more spiritual faith, to put the question in John 6:6, seeking "to prove him." This innate diffidence which affected Philip’s religious beliefs found expression in his outer life and conduct also. It was not merely modesty, but also a certain lack of self-reliance, that made him turn to Andrew for advice when the Greeks wished to see Jesus. The story of his later life is, however, sufficient to show that he overcame those initial defects in his character, and fulfilled nobly the charge that his risen Lord laid upon him (compare Matt 28:16-20).
6. Bartholomew, Nathanael
„X Believable
„X Trustworthy
„X Intellectual Thinker
"Can anything good come out of Nazareth?" he asked. Philip did not argue with him, but simply said, "Come and see." After Nathanael met Jesus, he acknowledged Him to be the Messiah, calling Him "the Son of God" and "the King of Israel" (John 1:46,49).
Nathanael was one of those privileged to speak face to face with Jesus after His resurrection (John 21:1-14). Some scholars see Nathanael as a type, or symbol, of a true Israelite-"an Israelite indeed" (John 1:47)-who accepts Jesus as Lord and Savior by faith.
7. Matthew
„X Sullied past
„X Redeemable
Tradition states that he preached for 15 years in Palestine and that after this he went to foreign nations, the Ethiopians, Macedonians, Syrians, Persians, Parthians and Medea being mentioned. He is said to have died a natural death either in Ethiopia or in Macedonia.
8. Thomas
„X Doubter
„X Loyal John 11:16
Two fields are mentioned by apocryphal literature as the scene of Thomas’ missionary labors. (1) According to origen, he preached in Parthia, the according to a Syrian legend he died at Edessa. The Agbar legend also indicates the connection of Thomas with Edessa. But Eusebius indicates it was Thaddaeus and not Thomas who preached there (see THADDAEUS). (2) Along with these are other sources identifying Thomas with India.
9. James (son of Alphaeus)
„X Obscure
„X Background person
10. Thaddaeus
„X Co-worker
„X Writer of Jude
The general consensus seems to indicate, however, that both Thomas and Thaddaeus the apostle had some connection with Edessa. Of the various identifications of Thaddaeus with other Biblical personages which might be inferred from the foregoing, that with "Judas .... of James" is the only one that has received wide acceptance.
11. Simon (the Zealot)
„X Zealous
„X passionate
12. Judas Iscariot (who later betrayed him).
„X Had the potential to betray him
III. PICK OUR FRIENDS INTENTIONALLY
14Then he selected twelve of them to be his regular companions, calling them apostles. He sent them out to preach,15and he gave them authority to cast out demons.
A. With Purpose
B. With Commitment
