JUDAH AND TAMAR
Genesis 38
Introduction:
I’ve been a Christian for 20 years now and I want to say that I have never heard the story of Judah and Tamar preached or taught.
Every story and major character of this first book of the Bible is taught - from the stories surrounding Adam and Eve, Noah, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob to Joseph, but not this one.
This to me is rather surprising, as anyone who has read the book of Genesis will be able to tell that this story is sandwiched in the middle of the very exciting story of Joseph’s life.
Logically, to avoid this passage is to miss out on the fuller lessons the Bible has to teach us.
I believe that the story of Judah and Tamar is one of many stories and teachings in the Bible that is avoided by many people because it disturbs us.
Frankly, if you take a hard look at the passage, it can be considered by some as bordering on pornographic material.
It’s about sex, and more sex, about prostitution, incest, and illegitimate children.
Move One:
But I would like to stress this morning that this passage is part and parcel of Holy Scripture and is profitable for teaching, rebuking, correction and training in righteousness.
To avoid passages that disturb us is a foolish thing to do.
For educators will tell us, and quite rightly, that we are best in the position to truly learn when we are faced with something that shakes us out of our comfort zones.
Technically, they call it “disequlibrium”
Disequilibrium happens when we receive input into our lives that we are unable to handle or process.
It’s like a mini paradigm shift, where we have to adjust our understanding to assimilate the new input.
Disequlibrium, as the term suggests, throws us off balance and it’s not a nice feeling
BUT it is necessary for growth.
for if we persist long enough in our struggle to understand the disturbing input, then we end up coming to a better understanding and thus acheive a new equilibrium.
- that is what growth is about.
It was John Stott who rightly commented that we often come to the Bible looking for some wonderful (i.e. nice things) but often God wants to show us disturbing things.
God is a realist! He knows what life is about and he doesn’t shy away from so called “disturbing things”.
Having said that, let us get now into the passage.
And if there are feelings of initial disequilbrium, let us persevere and follow through.
Move Two:
And as this a long story ...
Let’s just concentrate on one main character, namely Judah.
Judah is quite an ordinary fellow.
He had eleven brothers and at least one sister that we know of.
He is not the number one son, nor the second or third.
He is the fourth.
He is not his father’s favourite - his eleventh brother was.
What else do we know about him?
He was a devious fellow - unscrupulous and unfeeling
He had little compassion and would do practically anything for a quick profit.
Now wait a minute, some of you may say ... isn’t that a little harsh?
Not really.
Take a look at chapter 37:26
It was Judah who suggested selling his own brother for a profit.
And if you read the text carefully, you will know that it is not because he felt sorry and didn’t want to kill Joseph.
For those who don’t know the story of Joseph, his brothers (Judah included) were jealous of him because he was their father’s favourite.
I can almost here him say, “Killing him is too good for him. If we sell him, the pampered brat will suffer before he dies. And as an added bonus, we get 20 shekels of silver.”
That’s a pretty cool amount of money - about 230 grammes of silver.
If that fact is not convincing enough, let’s read another portion of chapter 37.v.31-35
What a devious plan he either thought up or agreed upon.
And when his father became so distraught, he kept up the charade.
Do you know his father mourned and suffered for 20 years thinking Joseph was dead? 20 years is a long time! When you read the rest of the story of Joseph, you will know that time did not heal his father Jacob’s broken heart.
And there’s more ...
He was also a coward.
He couldn’t keep up the charade and was racked with guilt, so what did he do?
Did he go and confess?
Did he try to find his brother and buy him back?
No! No! He ran away ....
and that is how we get this story in chapter 38.
Move Three:
So here we find Judah, a coward running away from his problems, abandoning his brothers and fellow conspirators...
He sets off to rebuild his life.
He marries a Canaanite woman ....
Bad move ... as that is breaking with the principles of marriage that began with his great grandfather Abraham, and on to his grandfather Isaac!
But never mind that ... it’s another story...
He has 3 children and his eldest son is married off to a woman called Tamar.
His eldest son was an evil person and so God kills him.
His second son marries his brother’s widow as is in accordance with an ancient law known as the levirate law.
Briefly, the law is meant to protect the line of the deceased brother, as the text in chapter 38 explains....
But his second son was selfish .. he wanted the pleasure of sex with Tamar but not the responsibility.
And so God kills him too.
BTW, for your information ... names in the OT are often a reflection and description of the person.
Tamar’s name means date palm – so you can imagine Tamar as having a slim and gorgeous figure.
Move Four:
So what does Judah do?
He doesn’t stop to think and ask WHY two of his three sons turned out evil.
Rather, he puts the blame on Tamar.
It’s all her fault - she must be cursed or is evil!.
And so he does the unthinkable...
he sends her home on the pretext of waiting till his third son is old enough to marry her and fulfill his obligations.
In an ancient world where a woman is considered as chattel
- with little human rights, that is a most unfeeling thing to do.
Tamar has married into Judah’s family.
It is he who is responsible for her not her parents....
To send her home is not right and it puts her to shame.
Not convinced this is so?
Well, when Tamar got pregnant by alleged prostitution, who was it who was informed and expected to pass judgment on her?
It wasn’t Tamar’s parents.... it was Judah!
Why? Because, it was Judah’s responsibility not Tamar’s parents.
Move Five:
Judah blames her and packs her off and left her there for a long time.
Then Judah’s wife passes away....
he mourns her death ..... FINALLY, something good about the man. He actually takes time to mourn for his wife.
And what does he do after he has finished mourning?
Oh Oh ....
He goes to a party! And not just any party .... a wild party!
Sheep shearing is a festive time where there’s lots of free flowing booze and sex. It has to do with the Cannanite religious practices.
And this BTW is one reason why marrying a Cannanite was not acceptable to his great grandfather, grandfather and father...
It’s a mixing of two different cultural and religious values.
Sit still, it gets worse....
Is there no redeeming facet to Judah’s life?
Move Six:
Judah sets off to the party and on the way he meets what seems to a very attractive prostitute...
we all know of course that it is Tamar, his daughter in law.
And what does he do?
He went over to her..... she did not even have to make him a proposition
- Judah took the initiative.
I know, our focus this morning is on Judah, not Tamar but say what you like about her ... she knows her father-in-law pretty well
She knew he had a sexual appetite, or she wouldn’t have been so bold with her plan.
I suppose if Tamar lives up to her name, she must have a pretty good figure. But this is almost ridiculous.
She is wearing a veil, for crying out loud!
Judah can’t even see her face.... and he still propositions her.
I suppose we can argue that in his grief, he wanted some female companionship but ... surely the man could at least be more discerning.
How could he sleep with the first woman he meets on the way to a party?
Judah looks like a real loser. Impulsive and sexually impure...
It’s horrible but this is not the end of his foolishness and impropriety.
Move Seven;
In order to obtain the goat he promised her (the asking price for the sexual encounter), Tamar asks him a pledge.
Not just any pledge - but his seal and its cord, and his staff.
And you know what?
Judah agrees!
Now this might sound rude - but ... only a fool would do that!
To give his seal and his cord is like giving away your identity card and passport, your company seal....
How foolish can a person be?
Those items are similar to our modern day personal identification papers
Well, maybe he was drunk... which might help explain his being able to sleep with his own daughter in law and not know it was her...
But that would only add drunkenness to his list of poor character traits.
Move Eight:
To cut a long story short.... he goes home and sends Tamar the promised goat
but Tamar disappears to hatch phase 2 of her plan.
I need to add at this point that we may not agree with Tamar’s actions but Tamar was only doing what she felt was right to obtain her levirate rights.
Ancient customs actually allows the father of the deceased son to fulfill the levirate obligations for his son....
I am not condoning her actions.... I am just stating a fact.
Well... we are reaching the climax of the story...
Tamar is soon discovered to be pregnant.
- 3 months pregnant.
and she doesn’t hide it.... she flaunts it and so her father in law, the one responsible for her is told.
His verdict?
Bring her out and have her burnt to death!
That, BTW was an accepted Canaanite punishment in some areas for such a sin.
And can you just imagine Judah’s secret relief?
- “Now I have a legal way of getting rid of that unlucky woman.
I don’t have to give my son Shelah to her!”
And so the crowd gathers...
a public burning would have been a great crowd puller.
In a time and culture that had no TV, cinema, video arcades, cyber cafes, malls, soccer leagues and the like.... it was something not to be missed.
Keep in mind... the Canaanite people were of a brutal and immoral pagan culture.
Move Nine
And then Tamar springs her surprise. As she was being led out, she sent a message to Judah
“I am pregnant by the man who owns these. See if you recognize whose seal and cord it is.”
But it is Judah’s response which is the biggest surprise. His response was:
“She is more righteous than I, since I would not give her to my son Shelah.”
And, the bible records for us .... :he did not sleep with her again.”
Move Ten:
Something happened to Judah that day that only God knows.
He admitted his guilt,
he forgave her,
he took her back
and he treated her with a new sense of respect and care.
Judah could have easily turned the tables on Tamar.
He could have accused her of stealing his cord and seal.
He could have argued, and rightly so, that she did in fact prostitute herself.
For that was not the way to go about claiming your levirate rights.
Today, we say it too: “the ends doers not justify the means!”
A woman was a nobody in those days.
She had little or no rights.
Even the levirate obligations was not for the woman’s sake, but for her deceased husband’s.
A denial or cover up by Judah and Tamar would have died a horrible death that day.
With such a bad picture of Judah’s character that I have described to you this morning, we would be tempted to think that he only did what he did because he knew the child in Tamar’s womb was his.
And that may be true....
BUT I am convinced this is not the case.
There are other ways to let the child live but get rid of Tamar.
Somehow, something else happened and Judah was a changed man that only God can explain. All we know is the results of that change!
Move Eleven:
Judah had learned the meaning of repentance.
He turned from wrong and did what was right.
Sure, he could not change the past but from that moment on,
He decided to do what was right.
Judah had also learned to forgive.
He did not argue that Tamar was also at fault
She was also at fault, but that is not the issue he looked at.
The issue he looked at was his own heart.
He would not condemn, because he knew that he too was a sinful man.
He refused to justify himself.
Judah had learned what the Lord Jesus seeks to teach us when he gave us the Lord’s Prayer
Do you remember this phrase?
Forgive us our trespasses (sins / debts)
as we forgive those who trespass (sin) against us.
Move Twelve:
Somehow Judah chose to take hold of the liberating power of repentance and forgiveness
and he chose to do so, at the risk of his own reputation.
He exposed his own sins to the world
But the reward was worth it.
Have you ever wondered why the sordid story of Judah and Tamar is right in the middle of the story of Joseph?
Let me tell you why ...
It is to prepare us for a great surprise that is revealed in the story of Joseph
Let me read to you
a few passages....
Read Genesis 43:8-9
Judah has found the courage to return to his family.
And look at the change in this man’s character...
Before, he plotted to sell his brother Joseph ...,
his father’s favourite son
. Now he promsies to protect his other brother Benjamin,
his father’s new favourite.
And does he follow through on this promise?
Read Genesis 44:18-34 and Genesis 45:1
Did you hear and read the way he pleaded for his brother Benjamin’s life?
His appeal is so sincere that Joseph is unable to keep up his charade.
It moved Joseph to tears.
And as the story moves on to the last days of Jacob,
we find that Judah is given the greatest blessings of his father.
He may be number four, but he has displaced his three older brothers .. and even his father’s favourite sons, Joseph and Benjamin.
We read that in Genesis 49:1-12
The biggest surprise comes out in the New Testament in Matthew 1:3,
In the genealogical record of the ancestors of Jesus Christ, we find
Judah and Tamar mentioned.
The Son of God chose to come to earth as a man, through the of Judah and Tamar,
through none other than their son Perez
- a product of tainted and scandalous episode.
SUMMARY AND CONLCUSION
My brothers and sisters in Christ ... what is God’s message to us today?
Let me share just three things....
First, let us learn humility and repentance.
If we are wrong or have sinned, let us be the first to admit it.
- even if the one who points out our wrong or sin is the worse sinner in the world.
It is hard when someone tells you “DON’T DO AS I DO, DO AS I SAY”
because inside we rebel and say ... “who are you to talk! You’re just as bad or even worse.”
But if the pot calls the kettle black because the kettle is black,
the pot is telling the truth.
I think it was Carl F. Henry who first coined the truism
“All truth is God’s truth”
That’s a fact .... truth is truth, no matter the source and wise people learn to accept it.
Second, let us learn how to forgive.
It is our sinful nature, not God who tells us to repay evil for evil.
We are to repay good for evil.
Practically all of the world’s ills could be solved, if more of us would learn to forgive
as God has done in Christ Jesus.
By refusing to forgive, we keep a myriad of hurts in our hearts
-some lying deep within us.
Hurts and offences we keep in our hearts are detrimental to our health - whether physical, emotional or spiritual.
If we cannot learn to forgive, we will never experience the liberating freedom of God’s forgiveness.
Worse than that, by refusing to forgive,
we contribute to the growing multitude of hurting people
Illustration:
I cannot forget the time I ministered to visit a young Christian who in their youthful foolishness and indiscretion did what they should not have done.
The result was a child out of wedlock.
With counselling, they did the right thing, got married and made a commitment to raise the child, as opposed to having an abortion.
As I lived in another town, I was only able to visit them a few months after their wedding.
And this is what that young man, barely out of his teens told me.
“Paul, I know I have sinned. God knows I have sinned. I have asked God to forgive me and know he has ... but why can’t _______ forgive me?
All they want to do is to remind me of what I have done wrong.”
I cannot forget even to this day, the pain in his eyes and voice.
Whatever happened to forgiveness?
All of us have made our fair share of mistakes.
And many of us know what it is like to be constantly reminded of our past mistakes.
It hurts so much when the past is brought up again and again, especially when those mistakes or sins are no longer a part of who we are.
Let us learn to forgive and really mean it!
Last but not least, let us remember that no life is unredeemable.
You may have messed up your life to such a degree that you think you have no hope left. That is never true.
As long as you have breath within you, there is hope.
Why? Because God loves you and has not given up on you.
He is always faithful.
Out of the scandal and mess of Judah’s life comes the reminder that in God’s time,
he will make all things beautiful....
Who would have thought, that from the union of Judah and Tamar,
We would have the line of the Lord Jesus Christ himself..
God is out to redeem lives, not condemn lives!
Jesus came that we may have life and have it in abundance.
But, we must remember that first, we have to learn humility and repentance,
as well as learn how to forgive.
As we do these things, we will allow God to radically bless us in ways we cannot begin to imagine.
Let us pray....
