Family Ties
How to Appreciate More Than Just One Person in Your House
I. Introduction
A teacher was trying to teach her class a lesson about fractions. After the lesson she tested one of the boys who was in a large family. Johnny, she said, There are six people in your family. Your mom bakes a pie, and she cuts it up for you, what percentage of the pie will you receive?
Johnny thought for a minute and said, “One-fifth.” The teacher said, “Now, remember there are six people in your family, how big would your piece of pie be?” And, again the boy said, “One-fifth.” The teacher said, “No, you don’t understand fractions.” Johnny respectfully said, “You don’t understand my mom. She would have said that she didn’t want any.”
There’s a whole lot more to your family than just being a help with fraction problems. Tonight, you’re going to learn how to appreciate more than just one person in your house: you. You’re going to learn about family ties, the ties that bind…or should bind together the hearts of a family.
II. A Few Good Men
Genesis 18:17-19 “And the Lord said, "Shall I hide from Abraham what I am doing, since Abraham shall surely become a great and mighty nation, and all the nations of the earth shall be blessed in him?
For I have known him, in order that he may command his children and his household after him, that they keep the way of the Lord, to do righteousness and justice, that the Lord may bring to Abraham what He has spoken to him."
Two things about Abraham that I want you to see tonight. Abraham was a father. Abraham was a good father. Father Abraham had many sons, many sons had Father Abraham. I am one of them and so are you, so let’s just praise the Lord. Right arm. Look again. God knew Abraham, that he may command his children and his household after him, that they keep the way of the Lord. Abraham trained his family to love God. He trained his family in the principles of righteousness and justice.
If you’ve got a dad, I hope that’s him. I pray that he’s like that, raising you and the rest of his family to serve the Lord, no matter what everyone around him is doing. There are very few fathers like that, and if you’ve got one of these, consider yourself very blessed. If your dad checks up on you every night, if he grounds you because you missed curfew, if he blasts you for being rude, if he teaches you the right way when you did things wrong, then consider yourself loved. If that’s your dad, you need to start appreciating him. If your dad doesn’t care what you do, if he doesn’t care that you’re here at church, if he’s nowhere to be found, then consider yourself having an opportunity to pray for him. I had a great dad when I was growing up. He loved us and we knew it. We thought everything was super duper ok. But my parents got divorced last summer. Dad messed up. Mom forgave. Dad messed up again. Mom wanted out. She had every reason to want out. Dad messed up. His first mistake was that he ran away from God. And there was a time that I was very bitter against my dad, so much that one day, I went to my aunt’s house, where he was staying, with the sole intention of cleaning his clock. We were going to throw down. He had lost his job and had been sleeping the day away. I was going to drag him out of bed and beat the living daylights out of him. I was bitter and I was angry. But when I got to the house and walked in to his bedroom, all I could do was cry. I knew I went there for the wrong reason, but I left with a new purpose. I was going to pray for my dad until his life turned around. I ate lunch with my dad this past Monday. He’s finally getting a job. His life is finally turning around. But it all began that day when I decided I wasn’t going to hate my dad, but I was going to pray for him. I saw the opportunity, after a while of being blinded by bitterness. But I finally took that opportunity, and I prayed. And then I communicated to my dad that I loved him, and I prayed some more, and now a life has been changed because of it. So, if your dad isn’t one of the few good men, there’s still hope, take the opportunity and pray.
Now, let’s look at the ideal family.
III. The Non-Dysfunctional Family
Colossians 3:18-21 “You wives must submit to your husbands, as is fitting for those who belong to the Lord. And you husbands must love your wives and never treat them harshly. You children must always obey your parents, for this is what pleases the Lord. Fathers, don’t aggravate your children. If you do, they will become discouraged and quit trying.”
Here it is. The ideal family situation. The Bible makes it very clear how families are supposed to function. Wives submitting to husbands. Does your mom throw plates and china at your dad in an argument? That’s not ideal. Husbands loving their wives and never treating them harshly. Does your dad pick up the pieces and throw them back? That’s not ideal. And children. How many of y’all are children? You’re somebody’s child? Here’s your ideal function… ALWAYS obey your parents. I know nobody in here has ever messed up on that one. Always? Remember, that’s the word that doesn’t leave room for exceptions. It’s not always obey your parents, except when they tell you to clean your room. It’s not always obey your parents, except when they ask you to wash the dishes. It’s not always obey your parents, except when they tell you your dog did it again and you have to scoop the poop. You get the point…always means no exceptions. Obey your parents.
Ephesians 6:1-3 “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. ‘Honor your father and mother,’ which is the first commandment with promise: ‘that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.’”
Check that out. Obeying your parents is right. But there’s also a benefit for you. Things are going to be well with you and you get to live longer. Think about that when your mom asks you to scrub the toilet. Hmm, If I scrub this toilet, my girlfriend won’t be mad at me anymore because things are going to be well with me, and I could be adding a year to my life. You never know. Maybe scrubbing toilets is one year and scooping poop is three. So, do you scoop the poop and scrub the toilet? I would if I were you. What would happen if you don’t? You’d get grounded and restrictions and all kinds of stuff right then, plus you’d die when you’re 40 instead of living twice as long or longer.
Ok, we’ll move on. Going back to Colossians- Fathers…do not aggravate your children. How many of y’all know that’s ideal? Dad, don’t aggravate me…it’s in the Word. Let’s get real here. Let’s get practical. What does that mean? Fathers do not scream at, yell at, or nag your children. Do not ridicule your children’s efforts. If little Bobby drew a picture of a forest with purple trees, don’t yell at little Bobby and say, “BOY, DON’T YOU KNOW TREES ARE GREEN. YOU BETTER GET IN THERE AND MAKE THEM TREES GREEN, STUPID.” You know what that is—aggravation. Dads aren’t supposed to do that. If they do, what happens to the children? They get discouraged. They get down. They give up. That’s not ideal.
Well, what if you don’t have the ideal family situation? What if you don’t have a mom or dad? You see, everybody has parents, but not everybody has a mom or dad. What’s the difference? Parents conceive a child. They just do their part to make the baby. But a mom or dad is much more than just a person that conceives a child. A mom or dad sticks around and raises the child, loves the child, feeds the child, spoils the child. Sometimes, a parent, for whatever reason, may not want the child, or be able to take care of the child, so the child becomes an orphan. Or, it may be that one parent hits the dusty trail for some reason and a child is left with only a mom or a dad. There are many people like that. So, what happens then?
IV. Family for the Family-less
Psalm 27:10 “When my father and my mother forsake me, Then the Lord will take care of me.”
Psalm 68:5 “A father of the fatherless, a defender of widows, Is God in His holy habitation.”
Family is a word that is rooted in God: God is Father- the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. The Bible reveals this aspect of God’s nature in varied use of family imagery. For example, God is our Father, God is Husband to His people, God is like a nurturing mother, Christ is the Bridegroom of the church.
When we think of family, what do we picture? A mom, a dad and children. And that’s typical. But what we don’t see, is that many people don’t have a family, or at least not the family we picture. Their family may consist of just a dad, or just a mom, or maybe just a grandma. When my mom was eleven, her dad shot and killed her mom. Her dad was taken to jail, her mom was dead. She and her brothers were put in a children’s home- an orphanage. She didn’t have the ideal family situation. At that point, she lost her family- no mom, no dad, nothing. After a while, she was finally placed in a foster home, with a mom and dad and two sisters. She grew up loved and cared for. Many people have a story like my mom, sometimes with a happy ending, and sometimes it’s a tragedy.
Play Like Mike clip. (beginning at 1:05:21. Scene begins Calvin and friends spinning around talking about Tracy. End scene after Tracy sees his dad and tells Calvin to leave)
Here’s the truth. What do you have? Do you have a mom? Do you have a dad? Do you have the ideal situation? The truth is…you have something, some aspect of a family, something that resembles even in the littlest way, a family. You need to recognize what you have, and then start appreciating it. Once you realize that you have more in a family than a lot of kids around the world, you’ll start appreciating your mom or dad a lot more. Think about it. Your mom or dad cares enough about you to bring you here to church, or to let you come. They want you to be taught about God, and about how to use your faith, so you can be more successful when you grow up. Regardless of your family situation, you’ve got a good thing going.
There is a true story of the Rosenberg family that lived during the Holocaust. Solomon Rosenberg, his wife, their 2 sons, and his mother & father were arrested & placed in a Nazi concentration camp. It was a labor camp, & the rules were simple. "As long as you can do your work, you are permitted to live. When you become too weak to do your work, then you are exterminated."
Rosenberg watched his mother & father marched off to their deaths, & he knew that next would be his youngest son, David, because David had always been a frail child.
Every evening Rosenberg came back into the barracks after his hours of labor & searched for the faces of his family. When he found them they would huddle together, embrace one another, & thank God for another day of life.
One day Rosenberg came back & didn’t see those familiar faces. He finally discovered his oldest son, Joshua, in a corner, huddled, weeping, & praying. He said, "Josh, tell me it’s not true." Joshua turned & said, "It is true, poppa. Today David was not strong enough to do his work. So they came for him."
"But where is your mother?" asked Mr. Rosenberg. "Oh poppa," he said, "When they came for David, he was afraid & he cried. Momma said, `There is nothing to be afraid of, David,’ & she took his hand & went with him."
Value every second you get with your mom or dad. Appreciate your family, and show them how much you appreciate them. Let’s pray.
