INTRODUCTION
• Isn’t it wonderful to be a part of the family of God!
• It is so good to be around people who love and care about you. This congregation is full of people who care about and love one another. As I look out into our congregation I would have to say we are a healthy happy family. You could really sense this during our revival. By the way if you missed it, you really missed out.
• Speaking of the church.
• HERE ARE THE TOP 9 THINGS YOU’LL PROBABLY NEVER HEAR IN CHURCH 9. Hey! It’s MY turn to sit in the front pew! 8. Preacher, I was so enthralled, I never noticed your sermon went overtime 25 minutes. 7. Personally, I find witnessing much more enjoyable than golf. 6. I’ve decided to give our church the $500.00/month I used to send to TV evangelists. 5. I volunteer to be the permanent teacher for the teenage Sunday School class. 4. I love it when we sing hymns I’ve never heard before! 3. Since we’re all here, let’s start the service early. 2. Preacher, we’d like to send you to this Bible seminar in the Bahamas.
• . . . And the number one thing you’ll probably never hear in church: 1. Could you please preach more about money!
• As I said, it is great to be a part of such a healthy, happy church. In our personal lives, I think we all want to have a happy healthy home life also.
• What makes a home a good home? Love? Patience? Peace? Kindness? Trust? Acceptance? Affection? Caring? Protection?
• All these things should be a part of a healthy family and they should be a part of a healthy church.
• What is missing from this partial list?
• As a parent, what happens in your home when one of the children does something that is not acceptable? What if they are going down a bad path? What would we do?
• In the church when one of us starts to stray down the wrong path, what should we do?
• The title of today’s message is “Trouble In the Family.” It is taken from Matthew 18:15-20 verses along with a few other supporting scriptures.
• This is one of those tough messages to preach because of the preconceptions that people have in dealing with this subject.
• What do we do as a church when we see one of our brothers or sisters in Christ heading down the wrong road? Do we just ignore the situation? Do we drop the holy hammer of justice on them? These things happen all too often in churches today.
• Within the church family, we will face a situation when we see a brother or sister in the Lord doing things that God tells us we ought not to do.
• The way we handle these times says a lot about the church we are a part of. Ignore the situation, the new are seen as too permissive. Drop the hammer on people, we are seen as being judgmental. What are we to do when this unfortunate situation occurs?
• Today we are going to see what Jesus tells us to do when these heart breaking situations happen within the church family.
• We are going to look at the person who needs discipline; the correct procedure for discipline; where the power comes from that allows us to discipline; and the true purpose for exercising discipline.
• Church discipline is something we do not see much of today. It is too easy to hop from one church to another. This is a message we need to hear today so if and when the situation occurs, we know how to properly handle it in a way that glorifies God and helps the person who is struggling.
• Today, let us see how we are to react when there is trouble in the family.
SERMON
I. THE PERSON WHO NEEDS DISCIPLINE (15)
• Who is the one who needs to be confronted? Look at verse 15. It tells us if your BROTHER (or SISTER) sins. All who are Christians are God’s children therefore all Christians are brothers and sisters.
• Because of the context and nature of this passage we are specifically speaking of brothers in Christ who belong to the same congregation, but we have a duty to help any brother in Christ.
• I had a good friend of mine who I worked with who confronted me with my choices in music at the time. We did not go to the same church, but nevertheless we were still brothers and my brother John helped me.
• We are not called to discipline those who are outside of Christ. We are called to help those who are in Christ.
• We cannot hold a person who does not belong to Jesus to the same standards we hold each other to.
• I hope we hold each other to a higher standard than we do our lost friends and family.
• The lost need Jesus. The saved need discipline.
• I am not speaking of spanking someone. Discipline means to disciple or teach. It does not mean to punish.
• When I discipline my children, punishment may have been a part of it, but my goal is to teach what is right and wrong and what is good and bad for them.
• Why is it important for us to do this? What I do is none of your business? Is it? What I do is your business if you belong to Jesus.
• Here is why.
• John MacArthur Jr. in his commentary on Matthew states, “The church cannot preach and teach a message it does not live and have any integrity before God, or even before the world. Yet in many churches where there is no tolerance for sin in principle there is much tolerance for it in practice. And when preaching becomes separated from living, it becomes separated both from integrity and from spiritual and moral effectiveness. It promotes hypocrisy instead of holiness. Divorcing biblical teaching from daily living is compromise of the worst sort. It corrupts the church, grieves the Lord, and dishonors His Word and His name.”
• Jesus says when our brother sins, we are to do something that will help them. How many of us would just sit back and let our own children or family member self-destruct? IF we love them, we will try to help them. Lovingly confronting a brother shows we love and care for them.
• If we see a brother sin, what should we do according to Jesus?
II. THE PROCEDURE FOR DISCIPLINE (15-17)
1. Go to him in private. (15)
• If we see a brother sin, in love we are to go to him in person in private.
• We are to “go and show” him his fault. We are to shed the light on what has been done. Our goal is to present what has been done in such a manner that he cannot escape recognizing the act for what it was.
• Many times as Christians we will do things we shouldn’t because we do not know. It is a maturity issue. If that is the case, talking to a person one on one will more times than not be all that is needed.
• GALATIANS 6:1 Brethren, even if anyone is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to yourself, so that you too will not be tempted.
• When Peter was intimidated by the Judaizers (those who wanted to make gentiles become Jews before they became Christians) in Antioch and began to separate himself from Gentile believers, Paul “opposed him to his face, because he stood condemned” (Gal. 2:11). Peter admitted his sin and repented, and years later he wrote of his “beloved brother Paul” (2 Pet. 3:15). Their deepened friendship no doubt was due in no small measure to Paul’s caring enough to rebuke his fellow apostle and turn him back to the purity of the gospel of grace.
• We are not the sin police. We are there to HELP our brother. Sometimes we will face resistance.
• ROMANS 16:17 Now I urge you, brethren, keep your eye on those who cause dissensions and hindrances contrary to the teaching which you learned, and turn away from them.
• When my friend John confronted me about my music, I got upset at him. He did not waver, he lovingly shared with me and after a few days, the Holy Spirit convicted me that John was right. I later thanked him for having the courage and caring enough for me to say something.
• The last thing we want to do if we see a brother stumbling is to make a public issue out of it. You do not need to gossip err “share” it with anyone except the brother who is in need.
• Too many parents are afraid to confront their own children today and look at what happens. If we love each other, we will try to help one another. We not the police, just a community of Christians, a family who loves and cares for each other.
• What if the person will not listen to you? What do we do, just drop it? Look at verse 16.
2. Take two or more with you (16)
• In the Old Testament, you could not be convicted on the word of just one witness. There had to be more than one.
• Does this mean we have to find more than one person who witnessed what happened? Yes and no. If others saw what happened, we are to take them with us to help convince the one who fell as to what they did.
• The other meaning here is we are to take others with us to help convince the person to change or repent. Many times when there are a few other people involved it helps to keep anything from escalating.
• Having other people also gives witness to what was and was not said in the course of helping the brother who is in error.
• What if that does not work?
3. Take it to the church (17)
• If the situation is bad enough, there comes a time when the church needs to be involved.
• The hope is that the church can appeal to the person to repent and get back on the right path.
• We have a couple of examples in the scriptures where this was done in 2 Corinthians 2 and 1 Corinthians 5.
• Once again the hope is that with the whole family of God encouraging them to repent, they will. What if this does not work?
4. Sever them from the fellowship of the church (17)
• Jesus tells us to treat such a person as an outsider. In 2 THESSALONIANS 3:14-15 Paul says, “If anyone does not obey our instruction in this letter, take special note of that person and do not associate with him, so that he will be put to shame. Yet do not regard him as an enemy, but admonish him as a brother.”
• In 1 Corinthians 5, Paul tells of a situation in the church where someone had taken up with his father’s wife. Paul says that the church was to not associate with this person because they would not repent.
• READ 1 CORINTHIANS 5: 9-13)
• This is a last resort, but it is something that needs to be done in this instance to protect the integrity of the church. Willful sin makes God look bad.
• Just where do we derive the power to confront each other when we are living in sin?
IV. THE POWER TO DISCIPLINE (18-20)
• It comes from God! Look at verses 18-20. READ
• Here is the same language that Jesus uses with Peter at the great confession. Using the analogy of scripture to define what binding and loosing means to allow and not allow.
• We have a mandate from God to let each other what is right and wrong in light of the scripture.
• When we follow God’s way of discipline, we have God’s blessing on what we do.
• When we are following God’s word, we have a mandate from heaven to correct a brother who is living in sin.
• In verse 19, in the context, this passage does not mean we get everything we want. It means that in these judicial matters such as church discipline, when the church acts in God’s behalf and in accordance with His Word in matters dealing with Sin, He acts in their behalf by confirming and empowering their faithful decisions and actions. (MAC)
• Agree is from a word, which literally means to sound together and is the term from which we get symphony. If even two of Jesus’ followers are in agreement with each other that a Sinning believer has either repented or refused to repent, they can be sure they are also in agreement with the Father who is in heaven. (MAC)
• God does not bend to our will, we are to bend to His!
III. THE PURPOSE OF DISCIPLINE (15)
• When it is all said and done, why would we want to go through all this? Why not just let the person do what they want to do?
• Would you do that with someone you love and care for?
• The purpose for discipline is found back in verse 15. To win your brother.
• Our goal is to help the person get back on track. We want them to get back on the right path.
• If you love someone, would you just sit back and watch their home burn down with them in it because you did not want to get involved?
• We also want to protect the integrity of the church. If we as Christians do not care how we live or how our brothers and sisters in Christ live, what kind of witness is that to the world?
• HEBREWS 12:7 It is for discipline that you endure; God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom his father does not discipline?
• If we are going to be Christ-like, then we need to try to be holy in our conduct. 1 PETER 1:16 because it is written, "You shall be holy, for I am holy."
• JAMES 5:19-20 My brethren, if any among you strays from the truth and one turns him back, let him know that he who turns a sinner from the error of his way will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins.
CONCLUSION
• How far and how much would we do to bring one of our children or family members back if they decided to go down the wrong path? Why would you do it?
• FOR LOVE!
• As a body of believers it is our duty to help keep each other on the path God wants us to. We are to do it with a spirit of love as Galatians 6:1 says.
• This is one of the reasons we have the church, to encourage each other, to help each other. In order for us to be able to do that, we need to be involved in each others lives.
• 1TH 5:11 Therefore encourage one another and build up one another, just as you also are doing.
• HEB 3:13 But encourage one another day after day, as long as it is still called "Today," so that none of you will be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.
• At the Auburn Christian Church we are a family. We are part of the family of God.
• First of all if you are not part of the family of God, we want to give you the opportunity to join God’s family.
• Secondly, if you are a part of God’s family already, but you have not formally joined our family at ACC, we invite you to do so today. When you join the family, you are a part of the family and will have a mutual accountability with everyone in it.
• Join us as we strive to go to heaven together!
