Central Christian Church
St Petersburg, FL
October 17 2002
Joe Bedy
Commandment # 5 has a promise with it. God’s promises are often conditional if you do this, then I will do this for you.
Exo 20:12 "Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.
Some things we dad’s have taught our children:
Don’t ask me, ask your mother.
Close the door; were you raised in a barn?
Don’t worry; it’s only blood.
A little dirt never hurt anyone; just wipe it off.
Keep your eye on the ball.
This will hurt me a lot more than it will hurt you.
Do I look like I am made of money?
We’re not lost!
No, we’re not there yet.
As long as you live under my roof, you’ll live by my rules.
I’ll tell you why; because I said so, that’s why.
You throw like a girl.
I’m not sleeping; I was watching that show.
I’m not just talking to hear my own voice.
Two wrongs don’t make a right.
What did I just get finished telling you?
Don’t make me stop this car!
What part of “no” don’t you understand?
If you’re gonna be dumb, you’ve gotta be tough.
Keep it up and I will give you something to cry about.
Do you want to cry inside or outside.
Boy, I brought you into this world and I can take you out. Its no problem for me to make another one of you.
Things mom taught us:
Hey you get out there and cut that grass, put your shoes on first, don’t come running to me if you cut off both your feet.
"If you fall off that swing and break your neck, you can’t go to the store with me,"
"If everyone else jumped off a bridge would you do it too?"
"If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.
Boy you eat every bean and pea on your plate.
"If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they’re going to freeze that way."
"If you don’t pass your spelling test, you’ll never get a good job!"
You put on clean underwear before you leave this house, if you get hit by a car and go to the hospital you won’t want them to see your underwear dirty.
(if you get hit by a car, are your underwear going to be clean?)
"What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you... Don’t talk back to me!"
"When you get to be my age, you will understand," or, "I will explain it all when you get older."
"Just wait until your father gets home."
You are going to get it when I get you home.
"One day you will have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you. Then you’ll see what it’s like! I can’t wait!"
God has assigned our parents to us.
And they are ours just as we are theirs, whether we have come to them biologically or chosen by some other means.
Now we are not going to kid ourselves here tonight.
We recognize that not all parents are perfect.
Cathi shared with me the story of a 9-year-old girl removed from her mother last week, because the mother’s boyfriend was allowed to have sex with the little girl anytime he wanted. When they wouldn’t let her go to the bathroom from the dinner table and she urinated on the seat, the mom rubbed her face in it until her face was raw. It was a wicked infection that put her in the hospital and where the authorities sought out the truth.
Mom and boyfriend are in jail.
For most of us although are parents were imperfect they were not that bad.
But did you ever find yourself saying, “I just don’t know what to do with my parents?”
We do have an answer for that…
3. God has given us instruction on how we are to treat our parents (Exodus 20:12).
Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.
We are told to honor our parents.
The word “honor” means to show respect, to reverence, even to hold in awe.
It has this meaning to it that we are NOT to take our parents, their authority or our care for them lightly.
Now there certainly comes a time when we are no longer under our parents authority, when we establish our own households and we don’t live under their roof.
However, no matter what our age (since this is a timeless command), we are to treat our parents with high esteem.
We are to treat them with the greatest care.
This is the commandment that changes direction in the scriptures.
The first four dealt with our vertical relationship with God and this one and the next 5 deals with our relationships to each other.
This commandment is binding upon us, because Jesus followed it. He was obedient to His parents will.
At Cana when Jesus said lovingly to His mother,”my time has not yet come,” can’t you see her giving Him “the look” and before too very long, not only was there wine, but it was the best wine.
And then at Calvary on the cross, His thoughts were not just on us, but on the needs of His mother. As he placed her in the care of the disciple He loved.
Many of us can make many excuses for not taking care of our parents. In mark 7:9-13 the Pharisees and the teachers of the law were using the excuse that they had pledged money for “Operation Pay Back” and so when their elderly parents needed financial support they argued, “sorry we can’t help we have pledged our money to the church.”
Listen to Jesus words and understand your responsibility to your parents as well as your children’s responsibility to you.
Mark 7:5 So the Pharisees and teachers of the law asked Jesus, "Why don’t your disciples live according to the tradition of the elders instead of eating their food with ’unclean’ hands?"
Mark 7:6 He replied, "Isaiah was right when he prophesied about you hypocrites; as it is written: "’These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.
Mark 7:7 They worship me in vain; their teachings are but rules taught by men.’
Mark 7:8 You have let go of the commands of God and are holding on to the traditions of men."
Mark 7:9 And he said to them: "You have a fine way of setting aside the commands of God in order to observe your own traditions!
Mark 7:10 For Moses said, ’Honor your father and your mother,’ and, ’Anyone who curses his father or mother must be put to death.’
Mark 7:11 But you say that if a man says to his father or mother: ’Whatever help you might otherwise have received from me is Corban’ (that is, a gift devoted to God),
Mark 7:12 then you no longer let him do anything for his father or mother.
Mark 7:13 Thus you nullify the word of God by your tradition that you have handed down. And you do many things like that."
The 5th commandment binds us because it summons us to honor, respect, care for and support our parents. In:
Eph 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.
Eph 6:2 "Honor your father and mother"--which is the first commandment with a promise--
Eph 6:3 "that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth."
Eph 6:4 Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
One of Grimm’s fairy tales tells of an old man who lived with his son, the son’s wife, and the young couple’s four-year-old boy. The old man’s eyes blinked, and his hands shook. When he ate, the silverware rattled against the plate, and he often missed his mouth. Then the food would dribble onto the tablecloth. This upset the young mother, because she didn’t want to have to deal with the extra mess and hassle of taking care of the old man. But he had nowhere else to live. So the young parents decided to move him away from the table, into a corner, where he could sit on a stool and eat from a bowl. And so he did, always looking at the table and wanting to be with his family but having to sit alone in the corner. One day his hands trembled more than usual; he dropped his bowl and, and broke it. “If you are a pig,” they said, “then you must eat out of a trough.” So they made the old man a wooden trough and put his meals in it.
Not long after, the couple came upon their four-year-old son playing with some scraps of wood. His father asked him what he was doing. The little boy looked up, smiled, and said, “I’m making a trough, to feed you and Mamma out of when I get big.” The next day the old man was back at the table eating with the family, from a plate, and no one ever scolded him or mistreated him again.
In conclusion we honor our parents because God loves us and we seek to love them as God has loved us.
One thing is for certain we did not have perfect parents and we have not been perfect parents, but all people have worth and need to be forgiven.
It will be tough for that little 9-year-old girl to honor and obey her parents, because they have been so ungodly in their treatment of her. Hopefully, they will repent, she will be able to forgive them and the relationship restored. If they do not she will have to still forgive her mom, maybe even meet her needs in old age, but she won’t have to be put back into an abusive life. This is God’s command to us.
Bibliography
Decker, Paul “What My Mother Taught Me”
… “What My Father Taught Me”
Smith, Joel “Honoring your parents”
Stroman, John A. “Charity begins at home”
