An amusing news story from Wales told of a feud in a church looking for a new pastor. It read: “Yesterday the two opposition groups both sent ministers to the pulpit. Both spoke simultaneously, each trying to shout above the other. Both called for hymns, and the congregation sang two -- each side trying to drown out the other. Then the groups began shouting at each other. Bibles were raised in anger. The Sunday morning service turned into bedlam. Through it all, the two preachers continued trying to out shout each other with their sermons. "Eventually a deacon called a policeman. Two came in and began shouting for the congregation to be quiet. They advised the forty persons in the church to return home. The rivals filed out, still arguing. Last night one of the groups called a let’s-be-friends’ meeting. It broke up in argument." The item was headlined, "Hallelujah! Two Jacks in One pulpit." -Source Unknown. (found in www.sermonillustrations.com)
Well, I’m sure this church has faced some conflict in its past, but hopefully nothing as explosive as the church in that news story. Anyone who’s spent any time in a church can tell you that conflict in the church happens regularly. Somehow we have the feeling that because we are all inspired by the same Holy Spirit, we’ll never have arguments in the church. Unfortunately, because the church is made up of people, conflict is inevitable, and even remarkably common. I’ve experienced some interminable arguments at synod assemblies; colleagues have told me of five hour council meetings and three hour congregational meetings. We could definitely use more conflict resolution specialists in the church today.
In today’s gospel lesson, Jesus gives us a roadmap of how to proceed when we find ourselves facing one of these conflicts in the church. Specifically, he identifies the situation of someone who has been wronged by another member of the church. How do we deal with this? Do we call a congregational meeting and kick him out? Do we gather enough support against her that the council asks him to leave? Do we talk to our friends without confronting the person directly? Do we go complain to the pastor until she does something about it? Do we pretend like the offense didn’t happen?
Jesus gives us a pretty clear cut approach here. First, Jesus says, “Go and point out the fault when the two of you are alone.” Jesus begins with the direct approach, with a face-to-face confrontation. This is one of the most difficult ways to confront a sister or brother in Christ, and yet it’s where Jesus starts. I think it’s important to note that this approach tends to believe the best about people. This advice assumes that we will be able to tell the difference between being sinned against and being annoyed. It assumes that we will be able to sift through our own defenses and insecurities to know when a person has harmed us and not just made a mistake or an error in judgment. Furthermore, it assumes that the person confronted might even be rational when confronted about an offense they may have committed.
Even if none of those assumptions are true however, Jesus tells us this is the place to start. Now, be honest with me. When you’ve been hurt by someone, do you usually go directly to them first? I think most of us would tell a few friends about it, garner a little support, get a little affirmation first, and maybe then we’d consider confronting the person. But Jesus tells us to go directly to the source. The purpose in this is not just to confront or get it off your chest. The purpose in telling someone that they’ve sinned against you is to offer reconciliation and bring them back into community. The verses before this lesson suggest that God rejoices over the repentance of one sinner just as the shepherd rejoices over the return of one lost sheep, even if he has 99 others. In the same way, the point of any confrontation on sin is ultimately restoration to the community.
But Jesus acknowledges that sometimes that one-on-one confrontation will not accomplish its goal. In that case, “if you are not listened to, take one or two others along with you, so that every word may be confirmed by the evidence of two or three witnesses.” Jewish law required that two or three witnesses be present to uphold a complaint. When witnesses are present, they can help to assure that the charges brought are real. The presence of these witnesses can also remind the accused that someone else is watching. You can’t just abuse someone in silence and expect to get away with it. Someone else is watching what’s happening and how you are responding to the charge.
Although this is not the point of the text, this step of gathering two or three witnesses makes me consider the role of “true friends”. Yes, true friends are those who will support you through anything, but I think the truest friends will also challenge you when you’re being unreasonable. In Jesus’ hypothetical confrontation case, the witnesses act in the role of what I’ve called a “true friend”. They are there, not only to tell the accuser what he or she wants to hear, but also to verify that the accuser’s complaint is valid. Those witnesses can “check out” the confronter’s complaint to make sure the offense charged is valid.
Jesus acknowledges that even the presence of two or three witnesses may not convince a brother or sister to repent and be reconciled. “If the member refuses to listen to them,” says Jesus, “Tell it to the church.” It is unclear here what this means. Is the accuser to tell the pastoral and professional leaders in the church about the offense? Or is the accuser supposed to announce it to the congregation? Whichever way is correct, this step broadens the circle. Now it’s not just three or four people; now it’s a whole group, who are all watching, hoping for reconciliation and repentance.
It’s important that we separate this step of confrontation in church conflict from mean-spirited gossip. This is not just a license to tell whatever dirty little secrets we know about other church members to the whole congregation. But this does require that we in the community of faith agree to certain standards of accountability. We will not just let a person abuse or take advantage of others simply because they belong to the church. The “tell it to the church” step helps us to seek accountability and responsibility for all our members.
Then Jesus gives us the last and final step: “If the offender refuses to listen even to the church, let such a one be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.” There are two strains of interpretation on this verse. The more traditional strain has suggested that treating such a one “as a Gentile and a tax collector” means exclusion, removal from the community because of unrepentant sin against another member. Religious traditions that practice shunning often turn to this scripture as a rationale.
But the second strain, which I’ve heard louder in the past five years, has looked at the biblical recommendations for dealing with Gentiles and tax collectors. Think about it: “What did Jesus do with Gentiles? How did Jesus treat tax collectors?” One of the most frequent complaints against Jesus was that he conversed with, and even ate with, tax collectors and sinners. The religious authorities questioned Jesus’ commitment to Jewish law for that very reason. And what was Matthew’s former occupation, before he left everything to follow Jesus? He was a tax collector! It is unlikely that the author of this gospel was recommending disgust or removal from the community toward those sinners who were unrepentant.
Remember that just before this text, Jesus reports that God rejoices over a repentant sinner just as a shepherd of a flock might upon finding even one lost sheep. Then Jesus gives us guidelines for confronting someone who has sinned against us, and suggests that even if someone won’t listen or repent, you should keep reaching out to them, continually seeking reconciliation with them. Understanding the earlier part of the text is crucial when interpreting the conclusion of this passage.
Then he says, “Again, truly I tell you, if two of you agree on earth about anything you ask, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, I am there among them.” We have usually interpreted this in a very sentimental, individualistic way. In other words, all I need to hasten Jesus’ presence is one other person. The original intent of this passage probably meant the exact opposite! Jesus was reminding us that whenever we gather in his name, we represent the body of Christ. It’s not just me and Jesus against the world. To experience Christ’s community, we have to be in community with people we don’t like and those we disagree with. That’s what it’s all about. The church is not about some pretty picture of us all holding hands with agreement all around. The church is more like a community of flawed people struggling to deal with inevitable conflict in a pretty healthy way most of the time.
My prayer for this congregation is that we might be able to approach church conflicts in a healthy way, following Jesus’ counsel about how to confront another member of the church. I pray that we may stay away from mean-spirited gossip and unhelpful arguments. It takes some work to deal with conflict in a healthy way, but in the end, it gives us a more healthy church that more adequately reflects the love of God and the Spirit of Christ. May you experience this congregation as a place of honesty, compassion, and hopefully, opportunities for reconciliation. Amen.
