10.2.2002amlbc
Extreme Love
Phil 2:4-9, Mark 12:29-31
Monk Story
There is a story told of an old monastery that had fallen upon hard times. It was once a great order, but as a result of waves of anti-monastic persecution in the seventeenth and eighteenth centuries and the rise of secularism in the nineteenth, all its branch houses were lost and it had become decimated to the extent that there were only five monks left in the decaying mother house: the abbot and four others, all over seventy in age. Clearly it was a dying order. Things looked grim.
In the deep woods surrounding the monastery there was a little hut that a rabbi from a nearby town occasionally used for a hermitage. Through their many years of prayer and contemplation the old monks had become a bit psychic, so they could always sense when the rabbi was in his hermitage. “The rabbi is in the woods, the rabbi is in the woods again,” they would whisper to each other. As he agonised over the imminent death of his order, it occurred to the abbot on one of those occasions to visit the hermitage and ask the rabbi if by some possible chance he could offer any advice that might save the monastery.
The rabbi welcomed the abbot at his hut. But when the abbot explained the purpose of his visit, the rabbi could only commiserate him. “I know how it is,” he exclaimed. “The spirit has gone out of the people. It is the same in my town. Almost no-one comes to the synagogue anymore.” So the old abbot and the old rabbi wept together. They talked for a short while and then the time came when the abbot had to leave. They embraced each other. “It has been a wonderful thing that we should meet after all these years,” the abbot said, “but I have still failed in my purpose for coming here. Is there nothing you can tell me, no piece of advice you can give me that would help me save my dying order?”
“No, I am sorry,” the rabbi responded. I have no advice to give. The only thing I can tell you is that the Messiah is one of you.”
When the abbot returned to the monastery his fellow monks gathered around him to ask, “Well, what did the rabbi say?”
He couldn’t help,” the abbot answered. “We just wept and read the Torah together. The only thing he did say, just as I was leaving – It was something cryptic – was that the Messiah is one of us. I don’t know what he meant.”
In the days and weeks and months that followed, the old monks pondered this and wondered whether there was any possible significance to the rabbi’s words. The Messiah is one of us? Could he possibly have meant one of us monks here at the monastery? If that’s the case, which one? Do you suppose he meant the Father Abbot? He has been our leader for more that a generation. On the other hand, he might have meant Brother Thomas. Certainly Brother Thomas is a holy man. Everyone knows that Thomas is a man of light. Certainly he could not have meant Brother Eldred! Eldred gets so grumpy at times. But, come to think of it, even though he is a thorn in people’s sides, when you look back on it Eldred is virtually always right. Often very right. Maybe the rabbi did mean Brother Eldred. But surely not Brother Phillip. Phillip is so passive, a real nobody. But then, almost mysteriously, he has a gift for somehow always being there when you need him. He just magically appears by your side. Maybe Phillip is the Messiah. Of course the rabbi didn’t mean me. He couldn’t possibly have meant me. I’m just so ordinary. Yet supposing he did? Suppose I am the Messiah? O God, not me. I couldn’t be that much for You, could I?
As they each contemplated in this manner, the old monks began to treat one another with extraordinary love and respect on the off chance that one among them might be Messiah. And on the ‘off’, off chance that each monk himself might be the Messiah, they began to treat themselves with extraordinary love and respect.
Because the forest in which it was situated was beautiful, it so happened that people still occasionally came to visit the monastery to picnic on its tiny lawn, to wander among some of its paths, even now and then goes to go into the dilapidated buildings to meditate. As they did so, without even being conscious of it, they sensed this aura of extraordinary love and respect that now began to surround the five monks and seemed to radiate out from them and permeate the atmosphere of the place. There was something strangely attractive, even compelling, about it.
Hardly knowing why, they began to come back to the monastery to picnic, to play, to pray. Its beauty drew them in. They began to bring their friends to show them this special place. And their friends brought their friends.
Then it happened that some of the younger men who came to visit the monastery started to talk more and more with the old monks. After a while one asked if he could join them. Then another. And another. So within a few years the monastery had once again become a thriving order and, thanks to the rabbi’s gift, a vibrant centre of light and spirituality in the realm.
The church can be an amazing place when it is working as its supposed to – when we are treating one another as if each person were Christ himself. When we are following the command Jesus left – “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength and love your neighbour as yourself”
Review
Last week we looked at the first half of that statement– we talked about loving God – having a hunger for God – loving God more than the trivial things that fill and consume our lives. We said we need to love God because its in loving God that we are most fully alive. And yet we get distracted.
John Piper summed up our problem well with his statement, ‘The weakness of our hunger for God is not because he is unsavoury, but because we “keep ourselves stuffed with other things”’
Let me ask – Did God speak to you last week?
Have you ‘slowed down’ so you can love him more?
Have you decided to practice a spiritual discipline this year to open the door to encountering more of God’s grace in your life?
Have you practiced consciously living with God every moment of the day?
Or did you just hear a sermon that made you feel warm – but you haven’t actually changed how you live? Why not?
I came to realise what a dangerous thing it was to share my eating issue. Bumping into people at Sanderson rd – I’m on display now! But I did walk away intact!
We live to know and love God – so Jesus says. And we live to love our neighbour as we love ourselves.
Jesus said Love is the distinctive mark of Christian community. ‘People will know you are my disciples by the way you love each other’. He said ‘be one like we are one’ – referring to the kind of love the father has for the son and the spirit.
And yet the fact is that ‘loving community’ is not an automatic by-product of being the church. We can be as destructive in relationships as anyone – loving community is something we create as we choose to love and as we choose to do things God’s way.
The monks in the story lived in a community of love where love had faded – where each began to be more concerned for himself and began to see the bad in the others. Where they took their eyes off the ball – you’ve seen cricket ad-nauseam over the summer and you’ve seen what happens when a fieldsman takes his eye of the ball. If you lose sight of the ball your cause is lost. Incredible loving community is available to us – its what God intends – but only if we keep our eyes on the ball.
Other Centredness
That ball is ‘not us’ – the ball is others in the community. The key to loving community like Jesus intended is ‘other centredness’ – the word for today is ‘other centredness’ and just for the record it doesn’t stop inside these walls either. Loving community spreads to all those around.
The story of the good Samaritan reminds us of that – our neighbours are not just those who are like us. Not just the people like us who we feel comfortable with.
The problem in all of this is that we are infected with self centeredness – some of us are worse than others – but its got a hold of all of us in some way. We are infected with the plague of self centeredness and yet paradoxically we are desperately seeking the joy of an other centred life. We maybe don’t even realise that we are most fully alive when we are most completely loving.
Self centredness is our natural modus operandi – it is the point we return to when we are at our rawest. It comes out when we are under pressure – it is there deep in our nature.
Self centredness says – I want my way – and I want it now, it says I will say what I want when I want. It says don’t put me out. I want my comfort even if it is at your expense. It says I am the person who matters most. I don’t care what happens to you so long as I am ok. And that attitude is there in all of us waiting to pounce.
In-Laws
I had to apologise to my mother in law recently! Val staying – and all the others – me narky – I was uptight that things were not as I wanted them. And I let that rule my decisions and actions towards others.
Danelle and I spoke about it. She loves me and she tells me and I listen. Some people have a ‘degree’ in criticism – their comments tend to roll off. The correction of people who love you though is always worth hearing. True and faithful are the wounds of a friend. I was letting my selfish nature call the shots and I needed to get over that.
In spite of my failures – I am capable of unbelieveable extremes of love – love that would blow your mind – so are you for that matter – supernatural love – but when I choose to ignore God, I am also capable of acts of extreme self-centredness and rudeness – and so are you for that matter!
Hugh Mackay says we are an individualistic self centred society and it has badly damaged our sense of community. In his book ‘Turning Points’ he says Australians are longing for a ‘village’ lifestyle – for an ideal community where people are valued and where real relationships take the place of busy independence. He makes the point that creating the village has less to do with where we live and more to do with how we live. Moving to a country town won’t make us more loving people. However – choosing to love and value relationships can create a village within a city. We can find what we desire, but paradoxically only as we choose to give love.
Hear that again. We choose to love and be in genuine relationships with each other. We choose to be either other centred or self centred.
Philippians 2
The best picture in scripture of this kind of love is Philippians 2 – Paul writes to the church in that city of the kind of love they are to have for each other. He says
(Phil 2:1-8 NIV) If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, {2} then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. {3} Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. {4} Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. {5} Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: {6} Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, {7} but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. {8} And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death-- even death on a cross!
Paul says - Do nothing from selfish ambition or vain conceit, but humbly consider others better than yourselves.
He says don’t just look out for yourself (he also says ‘it is OK to do that’), but look out for the interests of others. That’s the priority.
He sums it up by saying ‘have the same attitude as Christ did – he chose to be a servant – he chose to give up what he was entitled to in order to love’ He is our model – ‘extreme love’ shows itself in a humble other centred life.
The love Jesus calls us to is really difficult. I am not easy to love – I reckon you probably have your moments too! And yet that’s the call – to love – to be other centred. And it can happen. Extreme love is possible.
Being Fully Alive
And just as we need to love God – just as we are fully alive when we engage with him – we need to love each other – we need to love those close to us – we need to love our enemies. That’s how God made us – that is the human being at his fullest. Loving God and loving others.
Philosophy café – Topic “Which do we fear more – Death or fully living?” I couldn’t believe the confusion and ‘lostness’ I observed in the attempts to define ‘fully living’. These people were grasping and knew they weren’t getting there.
“Its about striving to be your best – to achieve the most” (what of those for whom life will never be about achievement because they are disabled?) Another man indicated that our purpose was only to reproduce the species – life seems so futile if that’s the only reason we are here. I sat and listened for a while as I felt like a stranger in a familiar crowd. I expected someone would say what was ticking around in my mind but the time came for me to leave and no-one had said it. So I took the mike and as best I could in ‘un-christianese’ language suggested that maybe our attempts to describe a full life were somewhat lacking and that a full life was related to the quality of our relationships – that when we gave and received love – between us and other, us and God then we experienced life to the full.
Maybe you sit there and say ‘I agree Andrew – I need to be more loving – I am fully alive when I give and receive love from God and others – but how do I love more fully – how do I do that authentically?’ For those of us who are plagued by self centredness – how do we keep growing in being other centered when everything seems to be pulling us back to me me me??
And I’m glad you asked that! Because I want to finish with a few handles that we may be able to grab onto to help us do this. Just as the spiritual disciplines open us to God – so practicing loving behaviour helps us to love others. The wise rabbi’s advice caused the monks to begin treating each other as Christ and it caused them to see the Christlikeness in themselves and so their community changed – so their own hearts changed.
For Jesus to love us – it was a choice – to put aside what he would have desired and to choose servanthood – to choose death. To love extremely.
So what can we do. Of all the different one anothers in the Bible I just want to highlight 3.
1. Serve one another in love.
This the path to self negation – the service of others – its why Mother Theresa has been elevated so high in our opinions because she has served so selflessly.
Serving is a practical way of putting ourselves beneath others – of letting go of any status we think we may have and loving in action.
Philippians says Jesus put aside his God nature and chose to take on the nature of a servant. He modelled serving in John 13 where he washed his disciples feet – an act most inappropriate for a Rabbi.
But serving is not easy – it needs constant practice.
Danelle coming home this week – me lying on the couch – serving can show in such little things.
Serving is love in action.
Martin Luther King once said ‘everyone can be great because everyone can serve’
Maybe serving is adopting a kid this year – loving one of our kids – don’t leave it to someone else. Let’s get a waiting list of prospective adoptive parents!
True serving occurs most readily when we are settled in ourselves with who we are. When we don’t have to impress anyone. In John 13 John says ‘Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God; {4} so he got up from the meal, took off his outer clothing, and wrapped a towel around his waist.’
Jesus knew who he was he was secure in himself – he didn’t need to impress or be seen as somebody important. He knew he was the Messiah and in that he was still able to serve.
2. Encourage one another and build one another up
You can’t tear someone down while you are building them up. You can’t focus on the bad when you are looking for the good. It doesn’t mean we don’t seek to speak whatever correction to each other we need, but I really believe we can never encourage each other enough.
As I was studying this over the week I noticed that in the two places the scriptures tell us to rebuke or correct one another they always say it with ‘encourage’.
(Titus 2:15 NIV) Encourage and rebuke with all authority.
(2 Tim 4:2 NIV) Preach the Word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage--with great patience and careful instruction.
If you need to rebuke or correct someone (and that is all part of love) then make sure you do it with some encouragement as well.
My care card file. Every one gets filed. Some days I read them again. They fill me with courage to keep going when I feel like I’m wasting my time.
The coke bottle exercise
Encouraging is easy!! It’s a kind word, a standing alongside, a helping hand, a loving embrace, a listening ear. All actions.
But encouraging makes a difference. Encouraging builds enthusiasm and spurs us on.
3. Forgive one another just as Christ has forgiven you.
Forgiveness speaks of clearing away the debris of broken relationships and loving fully again. Of choosing to let go of hurt.
Imagine if we were to dump a truckload of horse manure in the middle of this building for every relationship each of us has where there is unforgiveness on our part. What would it smell like in here?
That’s not a fiction – that’s a fact!! Unforgiveness stinks! It will be sniffed out by anyone who walks in the door and it will repel people from the church quicker than anything.
I like what Paul says in Romans ‘As much as it depends on you live at peace with everyone’. I actually think it is probably the one thing that really distinguishes our love so clearly.
Shirl
Conclusion
Love is about other centredness .
Why not ask God for a relational area to grow in this year – maybe in serving, or encouraging or maybe you need to grow in forgiveness. Then pray that he will develop it in your life. This is beyond us. Remember it is God who transforms us.
Douglas Coupland, who coined the term ’Generation X’, concludes in his book Life After God, "my secret is that I need God - that I am sick and can no longer make it alone. I need God to help me give, because I no longer seem to be capable of giving; to help me be kind, as I no longer seem to be capable of kindness; to help me love, as I seem beyond being able to love."
We need God to enable us to love.
Jesus says ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all of your soul and mind and strength and love your neighbour as yourself’ – Jesus sets the bar high when it comes to loving!
Do we believe that in these actions that we are fully alive – that the church is capable of what God intends? If we plan to be the church that is the aroma of Christ to this community – if we hope to impact others thru our existence then we need this kind of extreme love.
A community of amazing love will be irresistible to an unbelieving world.
