Romans Series # 52 August 21, 2002
Title: A Christian’s "To Do" List Part 4
Website: www.newlifeinchrist.info
Email: pastorsarver@yahoo.com
Introduction: Welcome to New Life in Christ. We are currently in Chapter 12 of Romans as we continue with message #52 of our verse-by-verse study of the Book of Romans.
Read Romans 12:17-21
Opening Prayer
Over the past three weeks, we have looked at Romans 12:9-21, which I view it as sort of a Christian’s "To Do" list. This list contains 15 different, and sometimes unrelated, exhortations of things Christians should practice. So far we have looked at 12 of the 15 things on the Christian’s "To Do" list, which were covered in verses 9-16. Without any further ado, let’s look the 13th thing on the Christian’s "To Do" list.
13. Live in such a way that nobody can honestly accuse you of wrong.
I covered the first sentence of verse 17 which says, "Do not repay anyone evil for evil " last week when I shared on verse 14 on how to respond to those who hurt us. I will also touch on the subject of revenge when I share on the 15th thing on the Christian’s "To Do" list, which I will speak on later tonight. So for now I will share on the second sentence of verse 17 which says, "Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody."
Paul is not saying that we should let the world set the standard for what is right. Paul is saying that Christians should go out of their way to make sure nothing in their life to seen as wrong, evil, unethical, or questionable behavior for Christian.
13. Live in such a way that nobody can honestly accuse you of wrong.
We rightfully strive to do what is right in the eyes of God. We rightfully strive to do what is right in the eyes of other Christians; after all we do not want to appear unspiritual. Sometimes though we do not concern ourselves enough with doing "what is right in the eyes of everybody." Everybody includes our co-workers, families, neighbors, employers, and the daily contacts we have in personal business such as people we meet while shopping, paying bills, driving, etc… Sometimes we seem to forget that the world is watching us and therefore our lives are either going to bring honor or dishonor to Jesus and the Gospel. Our choices and behavior will reflect either positively or negatively upon Christianity. Paul was always concerned the Christian’s lives reflect positively on the Gospel. Let me share with you two examples of this from Scripture.
Read 2 Corinthians 8:19-21
In this example, Paul was in charge of a rather large monetary gift that had been given for Christians in need. Rather than be secretive about the use of the money, he went to great "pains" to avoid any negative criticism and to do what is right in the eyes of everybody, i.e. both the Lord and men. He was following the 13th principle on the Christian’s "To Do" list.
13. Live in such a way that nobody can honestly accuse you of wrong.
This example of Paul’s and this principle is one reason I have a problem with many of the TV preachers who live in extravagance, such as in million-dollar mansions, and having multiple luxury cars. While it is debatable in some Christian circles whether it is acceptable or right to become wealthy in full time ministry, there is no doubt that such extravagant living does reflect negatively on the Gospel in the eyes of the world. Pastors or preachers who live in such extravagance are not "being careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody."
Let’s look at another example of Paul’s concern that Christian’s lives reflect positively on the Gospel.
Read Titus 2:1-10
Three times in this passage Paul notes that one of his primary concerns is that Christian’s behavior be seen as good in the eyes of everybody. Young women are to be kind, submissive, pure, and "busy at home", so that "no one will malign the word of God." (Vs. 5) Young men, including Titus, are to be such a good examples that even those who "oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us." (Vs. 8) Slaves are to be respectful, hard-working, honest, and obedience so that "they will make the teaching about God our Savior attractive."
In all three examples the main concern is that Christians reflect positively on Christianity by following the 13th thing on the Christian’s "To Do" list, which is…
13. Live in such a way that nobody can honestly accuse you of wrong.
Each of us need to examine our own lives and see if there is anything that is questionable, reflects negatively on the Gospel, or could be interpreted as wrong in the eyes of anyone.
What about your business dealings? Do you handle your business in such a way that nobody could ever honestly think that you have cheated them, overcharged them, or done wrong to them in any way? What about your driving habits? Do you drive is such a way that nobody can honestly accuse you of being unlawful or discourteous? What about handling disputes and disagreements? Do you do so with such kindness, gentleness, honesty, and humility that nobody can find anything wrong in your attitude? You may say, "If I am too kind, people will take advantage of me and not treat me right." Maybe, but it is better to be wronged, than to be wrong. What about your relationships with those of the opposite sex? Do you handled them in such a way that nobody could ever even mistakenly think that you are engaging in immoral behavior?
There are many other areas of our lives that we need to "be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody" that I could discuss, but the point is clear.
13. Live in such a way that nobody can honestly accuse you of wrong.
Now let’s look at the 14 thing on the Christian’s "To Do" list, which is. . .
14. Try your best to get along with everybody.
Read Romans 12:18
In one Peanuts’ comic strip, Linus once said to Charlie Brown, "I love humanity; its people I can’t stand!" Isn’t that the truth! Loving people and getting along with people is no easy task. There will be some people whom we can’t stand. There are some people who are very difficult to get along with. There are grouching neighbors and spouses, sensitive Christians who are easily offended, impossible bosses and customers, and arrogant and discourteous drivers. Nevertheless, the Bible says we are to try and “live at peace with everyone.”
Paul acknowledges right up front verse 17 that there may be some people you may not be able to live at peace with. That’s why he says, "If it is possible" you should do so. With some people you will not win, no matter how kind, gentle, humble, or apologetic you are. Getting along with others is like marriage, it requires both parties’ willingness. While we cannot control whether others do their part, we can control whether we do ours. As Paul says, "As far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone."
In part it does depend on you and I doing our part and going the extra mile to get along. Sometimes getting along may mean keeping our mouths shut when others malign or aggravate us. Sometimes getting along with everyone may mean apologizing, even if we haven’t really done anything wrong. Sometimes getting along with others may mean paying money to repair or replace something that we’re not really responsible for. Sometimes getting along with others may mean that we have to take the abuse of others, without fighting back in any way. I have to do this on the roadways sometimes. Sometimes I have made a seemingly safe and appropriately lane change but another driver behind me feels differently and become irate. In such a situation, the Christian thing to do is not to insist on being in the right, but instead to move over and let the other driver in front. As Paul says, "As far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone." Do your part.
14. Try your best to get along with everybody.
Sometimes I and other have had to apply this principle on the golf course. Every once in a while, you will have a group of golfers behind you who are in a hurry and instead of kindly asking to play through, they try and intimidate you by hitting balls near you or making annoying comments. In those cases, I could respond like I would have years ago with stubbornness and anger, but the Bible tells me to try and get along with everyone and that would include even the worst and most obnoxious of people, so I go and apologize for holding them up and kindly ask if they would like to play through. This is applying the principle of the 14 thing on the Christian "To Do" list, which is...
14. Try your best to get along with everybody.
There have also been times when I have not applied this principle and have let the “old self” get the upper hand. A couple weeks ago, David Henrich was helping me move some furniture with his truck and trailer. In the process of moving the furniture, a large garbage truck came to empty the bin at the complex we were at. It appeared that David’s truck and trailer were in the way as the garbage truck was backing up, so David yelled to the driver and asked him if he’d like him to move the truck and trailer out of the way. The driver did not respond, so David whistled because he assumed that the driver of the garbage truck had not heard him. It turns out the man had heard David the first time and he responded to David’s innocent whistle by angrily saying to us, "Do not ever do that again!" In a smart-alecky way he then said, "If I needed you to move, I would’ve told you!" My response to him should have been, "Sorry, just trying to help" Instead I responded to the driver in the same smart-alecky manner that he responded to us and said, "What’s your problem!"
The point of this story being that we all need to watch every aspect of our lives and give a 110 percent toward keeping the peace with everyone, including those who are very difficult to get along with. The 14th thing on the Christian’s "To Do" list is...
14. Try your best to get along with everybody.
Now let’s look at the 15th and final thing on the Christian’s "To Do" list.
15. Do not get even with your enemies; treat them as a friend.
This is the main point of the next three verses.
Read Romans 12:19-21
Let me the start this section by sharing a letter with you that was written to another pastor. The letter read as follows: "Dear Pastor, I’ve heard you say to love our enemies. I’m only 6 years old and I do not have any yet. I hope to have some when I am 7. Your friend, Amy."
Most of us do not have the problem this little girl had. We have enemies, and often in abundance. Your enemy could be a co-worker, employer, neighbor, ex-spouse or even of current spouse on occasion, a fellow church member, someone who persecutes you, abuses you, or has taken advantage of you. We all have enemies, so we need to know how to respond to them. In verse 19, the first thing Paul says is, "Do not take revenge. . ." In other words, do not try and get even.
When we are hurt, we want those who hurt us to experience the same hurt, but the Bible says we must be willing to let go of that desire for revenge and realize that those wounds that we have are not going to be healed by getting even. Let me give you an example of the kind of getting even attitude that we’re not to have.
Max Lucado, in his book The Grip of Grace, tells the story of a man name Kevin Tunell. Let me tell you that story as Max relates in his book: "Each week Kevin Tunell is required to mail a dollar to a family he’d rather forget. They sued him for $1.5 million but settled for $936, to be paid a dollar at a time. The family expects the payment each Friday so Tunell won’t forget what happened on the first Friday of 1982. That’s the day their daughter was killed. Tunell was convicted of manslaughter and drunken driving. He was seventeen. She was eighteen. Tunell served a court sentence. He also spent seven years campaigning against drunk driving, six years more than his sentence required. But he keeps forgetting to send the dollar. The weekly restitution is to last until the year 2000. Eighteen years. Tunell makes the check out to the victim, mails it to her family, and the money is deposited in a scholarship fund. The family has taken him to court four times for failure to comply. After the most recent appearance, Tunell spent thirty days in jail. He insists he’s not defying the order but rather is haunted by the girl’s death and tormented by the reminders. He offered the family two boxes of checks covering the payments until the year 2001, one year more than required. They refused, it’s not the money they seek, but penance. Quoting the mother, ’We want to receive the check every week on time. He must understand we are going to pursue this until August of the year 2000. We will go back to court every month if we have to.’" Source: In the Grip of Grace, by Max Lucado. page 149,150 as used in the sermon "Letting Bygones Be Bygones" by Pastor Richard Green. http://hillcrestalliance.org/sermon/980628.html
Why should we not eek revenge like these people did? After all, doesn’t somebody need to see that people reap what they sow? Yes they do, somebody does need to see that appropriate punishment is applied, but that somebody is not you! It is God’s prerogative to repay those who have hurt us. This is why Paul says, "Leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ’It is mine to avenge; I will repay. . .’" The idea here is not that we should not get even so that God will "get" our enemies really good! The point that is being made is that it is not our place to concern ourselves with punishing the wicked or those who have hurt us. How should we respond to our enemies?
15. Do not get even with your enemies; treat them as a friend.
Treating your enemy as a friend is the message of the first part of verse 20. Rather than seeking to get even, we should seek to help our enemies. If he is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. Paul then quotes Proverbs 25:22 which says, "In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head." This may sound like you’re being kind to your enemy in order to punish him in some way, but that is not the point. This verse refers to an Egyptian custom. When an Egyptian wanted to show repentance and sorrow over their wrongdoing to another, they would carry a pan of burning coals on their head to represent the burning pain of their shame and guilt. Therefore what Paul is saying here is that treating your enemy as a friend may result in their becoming sorrowful and repentant. What does getting even lead to in your enemies attitude? In most cases, a hardening of the heart, so it is much better to respond with kindness and treat your enemies as a friend.
15. Do not get even with your enemies; treat them as a friend.
Paul concludes this section with verse 21 which says, "Do not be overcome (defeated) by evil, but overcome evil with good." We’re overcome by evil when respond to those who hurt us with evil, but we become overcomers when we respond to those who hurt us by doing good!
Conclusion: Tonight we looked at the last three things on the Christian’s "To Do" list.
13. Live in such a way that nobody can honestly accuse you of wrong.
14. Try your best to get along with everybody.
15. Do not get even with your enemies; treat them as a friend.
I hope each of us will live out these principles in the power of the Holy Spirit.
Closing Prayer
