Introduction:
I can appreciate the frustration Charlie Brown has in the Peanuts cartoons. Like the one where Lucy is philosophizing and Charlie is listening. As usual, Lucy has the floor, delivering one of her lectures.
She says, "Charlie Brown, life is a lot like a deck chair. Some place it so they can see where they’re going. Others place it to see where they’ve been. And some so they can see where they are at the present." Charlie Brown sighs and says, "I can’t even get mine unfolded."
More than a few of us can identify with Charlie Brown. Life gets rough at times. Some of the choices we have to make are difficult. We find ourselves, like the old saying, "between a rock and a hard place". Stuck between two possibilities where an argument could be made for going either way. Such a situation is called a dilemma.
There are different kinds of dilemmas. Some dilemmas are known as volitional dilemmas. That’s where we want to do two things at the same time. Young couples who have been married for two or three years, sometimes less, are often trying to finish their schooling, yet are anxious to start a family. What should they do? To start having children means extra financial pressure and an even greater strain on time and energy. But to wait several years means that they may be in their thirties, and they really want to begin parenting earlier than that. What should they do?
Another volitional dilemma occurs when you’re unhappy in a congregation. The problem is especially difficult if you’ve been a member for many years and all your closest friends are there. Do you stick it out and try to help bring about needed changes, which may not be too promising, or do you state your disagreement and go somewhere else? As some of you know very personally, that can be a difficult choice to make.
Emotional dilemmas are even more intense. This takes place when we have different feelings about the same event. For example, suppose a child has had a pet for many years. The bond between them is inseparable. But the animal has an incurable disease that makes it more and more miserable. You know what the dilemma is. To provide the pet relief means putting it to sleep, but it’s a painful option.
If you think that one is difficult, how about dealing with an adult rebellious son or daughter? He or she has moved out of the house and is living a lifestyle that is disappointing to God and to you. But it’s obvious that financial assistance is needed. In fact, they’ve asked for it. Do you help them or do you turn them down? It’s an emotional dilemma that will tear you up no matter what you decide to do.
Then there are geographical dilemmas that occur when we want to be in two places at the same time. Maybe you love where you’ve been living for years, but moving would mean a raise in salary, not to mention the opportunity to make new friends and enjoy some much-needed changes. But leaving would be difficult because of the kids who are now teenagers, and the longstanding relationships you’ve built up in the church, in your neighborhood and with your friends. You weigh both sides. Neither is ideal, yet both have their benefits.
Whenever we’re faced with a dilemma, we’re pulled in two different directions. We feel the strain and we don’t quite know what’s the best thing to do. And I might add that being older and wiser doesn’t mean that you’re immune to the problem. As Charlie Brown put it, there are times when we can all find it difficult to get our deck chair unfolded.
I. Paul’s Personal Dilemma
All of this brings us to the apostle Paul who was a prisoner of Rome in his own house. If you’re familiar with the book of Philippians, you know that Paul reacted positively to his circumstances and wrote a joyful letter of encouragement to his brethren in Philippi. In fact, the Philippian letter is best summed up in chapter 4, verse 4: "Rejoice in the Lord always,. Again I will say, rejoice!"
But even with such a positive attitude, Paul admitted that he had a dilemma of his own. "For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. But if I live on in the flesh, this will mean fruit from my labor; yet what I shall choose I cannot tell. For I am hard pressed between the two, having a desire to depart and be with Christ, which is far better. Nevertheless to remain in the flesh is more needful to you." (Philippians 1:21-24).
There is no doubt that Paul’s dearest friend, in fact his most intimate relationship on earth, was with Jesus Christ. No one else meant more to him; therefore, the thought of being with him brought Paul great joy. His feelings could be summed up in the song we sang a few moments ago:
Jesus is all the world to me,
My life, my joy, my all;
He is my strength from day to day,
Without him I would fall.
Jesus is all the world to me,
I want no better friend;
I’ll trust him now, I’ll trust him when
Life’s fleeting days shall end.
Beautiful life with such a friend;
Beautiful life that has no end;
Eternal life, eternal joy,
He’s my friend.
When someone who lives in heaven means that much to you here on earth, it creates a dilemma: You want to be with him. Right now! That explains why Paul didn’t hesitate to write "to die is gain". But, at the same time, he realized that his work on earth wasn’t finished. God had more he wanted to do through his chosen apostle. Paul knew that, which was what caused the great dilemma. As he put it, "I am hard pressed between the two". The Greek word that Paul uses here is one that would be used by a traveler to describe a narrow canyon with a wall of rock on one side and a wall of rock on the other side. To use our modern terminology, he said he was between a rock and a hard place. Notice what his two choices were:
1. "Having a desire to depart and be with Christ" (which he said was much better for him), or
2. "To remain in the flesh" (which he admitted was more necessary for the sake of the Philippian brethren, and others I’m sure).
Let’s take a look at those two choices and notice some of the benefits and liabilities of both sides.
A. To Depart
The Greek word that Paul uses here is the word that would have been used for a person striking camp, loosening the tent ropes, pulling up the stakes and moving on. It would have been used to describe a sailor loosening the mooring ropes on a boat, pulling up the anchors and setting sail. One of Paul’s choices was to pull up the tent stakes, pull up the anchor and head on.
In other words, dying. What were the benefits of dying? Paul would be with Christ instantly. He would be free of all earth’s hassles and limitations and frustrations. He would be in that place where "there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying; and there shall be no more pain, for the former things are passed away." (Revelation 21:4). At the point of death, Paul would immediately experience uninterrupted joy and the joy of unending pleasure in the most perfect of all places.
What were the liabilities of dying? Paul would have to leave those who needed him, which would seriously affect their spiritual growth. He would no longer be able to share the gospel with the Roman guards assigned to watch him or to encourage those who visited with him. In addition, his missionary activity would instantly cease. So, as good as death may have seemed, it wasn’t without its liabilities.
B. To Remain
If the apostle Paul had remained on and continued in his ministry, the benefits were obvious. He would have had a hand in the spiritual growth of many, his role as a teacher of the Philippians (and many others) would continue, and his vision of reaching a world for Christ would continue to keep the fires of evangelism going everywhere he went. And don’t forget about his writing ministry. By remaining, his inspired letters would continue to be written.
The liabilities? He would remain absent from his heavenly home. He would remain in prison, his pain would only increase. There would be more suffering and more persecution. After all he had been though, who needed more? It was time for some relief.
II. Making the Choice
Now you might think that Paul was mature enough to make this decision without too much of a struggle. After all, he was a strong and faithful soldier of the Christian faith, a wise counselor, and a spiritually-minded man of God. Surely he could decide on his own. But, according to his own words, he admitted, "Yet what I shall choose I cannot tell." He says, in essence, "I don’t know what to do." Both choices made logical sense. Neither one of them would be wrong. Both of them had some positive benefits. It was a real toss-up. So he did the right thing -- he let the Lord decide for him.
Let me make this point: When we arrive at such dilemmas in our lives and we’re unable to figure out the right direction to go, it’s so very important that we turn to the Lord. James said, "If any of you lacks wisdom...", and wisdom is nothing more than the ability to make right decisions, "If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him." (James 1:5).
I like this poem by Horatius Bonar:
Thy way, not mine, O Lord, however dark it be!
Lead me by Thine own hand, choose out the path for me.
Smooth let it be or rough, it will be still the best;
Winding or straight, it leads right onward to thy rest.
I dare not choose my lot; I would not, if I might;
Choose Thou for me, my God; so shall I walk aright.
The kingdom that I seek is thine; so let the way
That leads to it be Thine; else I must surely stray.
Take Thou my cup, and it with joy or sorrow fill,
As best to Thee may seem; Choose Thou my good and ill.
Choose Thou for me my friends, my sickness or my health;
Choose Thou my cares for me, my poverty or wealth.
Not mine, not mine the choice, in things great or small;
Be Thou my guide, my strength, my wisdom and my all!
I like the thoughts expressed in that poem. Realizing as Solomon did that "There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death." (Proverbs 14:12), we turn to the Lord and allow him to be our guide, our strength, our wisdom. We acknowledge that what God said in Isaiah 55 is true: ’"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways’, says the Lord. ’For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.’" (Isaiah 55:8-9).
In Mark 14, we read about a dilemma faced by Jesus Christ. There he was in the Garden of Gethsemane knowing that the mob was gathering to climb the hill and capture him. He knew what the next few hours would hold. He knew there would be a scourging that would slice his back into shreds. He knew that huge nails would be hammered into his hands and his feet. He knew how excruciating the pain would be. The dilemma was this: Should he avoid the pain thus leaving humanity with no hope of salvation, or should he submit willingly?
That may not sound like too difficult a choice, and I guess it’s not too difficult unless you happen to be the one who is about to be crucified. The attitude expressed by Jesus in the face of this dilemma is one that we all need to develop: "Then they came to a place which was named Gethsemane, and he said to his disciples, ’Sit here while I pray.’ And he took Peter, James and John with him, and he began to be troubled and deeply distressed. Then he said to them, ’My soul is exceedingly sorrowful, even to death. Stay here and watch.’ He went a little farther, and fell on the ground, and prayed that if it were possible, the hour might pass from him. And he said, ’Abba, Father, all things are possible for you. Take this cup away from me; nevertheless, not what I will, but what you will.’" (Mark 14:32-36).
"Father, on the one hand I want to die for the sins of the world, but on the other hand, I’m dreading the pain and suffering that I’m going to have to go through." So, in essence, Jesus didn’t make the decision himself. He allowed the Father to make it for him. "Not what I will, but what you will." Now it’s easy to say that, but I realize it’s a lot harder to carry through on it.
There has been much speculation as to why Jesus took Peter, James and John with him in the garden. Perhaps he took them for companionship, sympathy or help. But I like the view that says he took them along for their benefit, not his.
Perhaps his purpose was to teach them that, as important and helpful as the fellowship and support of other believers can be, there are times when a person’s only help is direct communion with God in prayer. I think Jesus wanted to show his apostles vividly that, in his humanness, even the divine Son of God needed the sustenance of his heavenly Father.
In acknowledging his human weakness and his subsequent need for his heavenly Father’s presence and strength, Jesus did what his disciples saw no need for doing. And it was because he looked to his Father that he endured and passed every temptation, including death -- the severest test of all. Every moment of Jesus’ life, from his first cry as an infant to his last cry on the cross, was lived in total submission to his heavenly Father.
That’s important to remember because every Christian at times faces temptations, trials and heartaches that threaten to overwhelm him. In the midst of such difficult times, even our closest friends may be unable to provide the comfort and strength we need. God certainly expects Christians to encourage and strengthen one another, and I don’t mean to downplay that; it is essential. But there are times when only direct, intimate communion with God in intense prayer can provide the strength to meet our needs.
Jesus’ ministry began and ended with relentless temptation directly by Satan. After he was baptized by John the Baptist, Jesus went into the wilderness of Judea and fasted for forty days and forty nights. At the end of that period the devil tempted him three times, and each time Jesus responded with scripture (Matt. 4:3-10). While Jesus agonized in the garden the last night of his earthly life, the devil tempted him again three times, and each time he responded by praying earnestly to his Father. The two weapons Jesus used when he faced difficult decisions were scripture and prayer, two weapons the Lord provides each of us.
There’s no way we can over-emphasize the importance of prayer. It’s amazing how much peace comes when we put the pressure on God’s shoulders, and the responsibility is on him, when the ball is in his court.
Paul says later in his Philippian letter, "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." (Philippians 4:6-7).
You can sum this passage up in six words: "Worry about nothing, Pray about everything." Paul writes about God’s peace which "will guard your hearts and minds". When he mentions peace as a "guard", he uses a military term for "marching sentry duty" around something valuable. As we transfer our troubles to God, God’s peace is appointed the duty of marching as a silent sentry around our minds and our emotions. It’s a peace that passes all understanding.
But there aren’t many people willing to turn the reins over to God because it requires humility. Listen to Peter, "Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon him, for he cares for you." (I Peter 5:6-7).
This is extremely difficult for certain types of personalities. And if you happen to be more intelligent than the average person, it’s even more difficult. And if you’re the super-responsible, I-can-handle-it-myself kind of individual who tends to be impatient, letting go and letting God take charge is one of life’s greatest challenges. But oh how we need to do it. We need to force ourselves to trust someone else who is far more capable and intelligent and responsible than we could ever be.
So what was Paul’s decision? "And being confident of this, I know that I shall remain and continue with you all for your progress and joy of faith, that your rejoicing for me may be more abundant in Jesus Christ by my coming to you again." (Philippians 1:25-26).
Somehow the Lord made it clear to Paul that his plan was to have him remain and to continue what he was doing. Even though departing would have brought him instant relief and rewards for a job well done, Paul accepted God’s decision and unselfishly pressed on.
II. Lessons to Learn
Let me suggest a couple of lessons we learn from this passage.
1. Making decisions in the midst of dilemmas forces us to rethink our priorities.
There is nothing quite like a dilemma to bring us back to the bedrock of what we consider essential. Maybe your dilemma involves spending more time at work vs. more time with the family. What’s more important to you? Maybe your dilemma involves trying to gain the respect of your peers vs. trying to live a moral, upright life. What’s really more important to you?
Many times if we can just understand what our priorities are, if we can just understand which things in life are most important to us, then it makes the decision a bit easier.
2. Choosing our priorities forces us to reconsider the importance of Christ in our lives.
There are a lot of different voices all around us all trying to pull us in different directions. Some of them are loud, some are persuasive, and a few are downright convincing. It can be confusing. If you listen long enough, you may be tempted to throw your faith to the wind, look out for number one and choose what seems to be best for you. Initially you may get a rush of pleasure and satisfaction. But ultimately you’ll wind up disappointed and disillusioned.
I want to challenge you to keep an eternal perspective, even though you’re in the minority, even though you may be surrounded by a bunch of success-oriented individuals who are urging you to ignore your conscience and grab all you can get now. If you want real lasting joy, then put God first. Be willing to do what God wants you to do above all else. It may have its tough moments, but you’ll never regret it.
I like this quote from bro. Max Lucado (And the Angels Were Silent): "We cannot choose the weather. We can’t control the economy. We can’t choose whether or not we are born with a big nose or blue eyes or lots of hair. We can’t even choose how people respond to us. But we can choose where we spend eternity. The big choice, God leaves to us."
