"Most Christians are habitual liars." Let me repeat that: "Most Christians are habitual liars." And quite proficient at it, too. Now, of course we don’t call it lying. And we don’t think of it as lying. In fact, we don’t think of it at all; we just do it, and that’s part of the problem. We’ve become so accustomed to speaking untruths that we don’t even pause to reflect on what we’re saying.
Let me tell you what I mean: When we gather together for worship or fellowship, we engage in something called small talk. How are you doing; how’s the family; how was your week; how are things at work. And the response is typically light, upbeat, positive. I’m fine, work is fine, the family’s fine. Everything’s fine. Everything’s always just fine, right up until the day the divorce papers are filed. Everything’s fine, even though your job has you so stressed out that you’re about to lose it emotionally. Everything’s fine, even though you worry that your teenage son may be getting into drugs. Everything’s fine, even though you’re struggling with feelings of anxiety and low self-esteem. Your family may see the truth at home – someone once said that home is where you go when you’re tired of being nice to people – but at church you put on a good show. At church, you tell people, "Everything’s fine. We’re working it out. The Lord will bring us through." Then you and the person you’re speaking with both smile and nod, content with your little shared falsehood. You both know that you’re not telling the truth, but neither of you wants to take the risk of bringing it into the open.
Now, you may object that this isn’t lying; it’s simply common courtesy. People don’t ask questions like that because they really want to know the answer. No one expects, when they say, "How are you?" that you will actually tell them how you are. They’re just being polite. And that’s true, to a point. Small talk does have its place. And you do need to use discretion. You can’t go around spilling your guts to people you barely know. But with these people, your brothers and sisters in Christ, you can, if you’re willing, choose to be honest. In fact, you should. You need to. God calls the church the "body of Christ," because our lives are joined together like members of a body; we share one another’s joys and sorrows. If life has been treating you like a punching bag, you don’t have to reveal all the details, but you can say, "I’ve had a really hard week," or "I’m worried about my kids." And then, if the other person wishes, they can inquire further, and give you the opportunity to say more, to go deeper.
That kind of honesty at least opens the door for genuine Christian fellowship, what the apostle Paul refers to as "carrying each other’s burdens" – things like listening, supporting, encouraging. But if you hold back the truth, and say things are fine when they’re not, then you might as well be at a PTA meeting instead of church. Being among other believers is one place where it should be safe to be real, and open, and honest. Why? Because here, we all know that we have nothing to boast of, either before God or before one another. We’re all subject to the same temptations, the same weaknesses, the same sins. There is nothing in us to commend us to God; in fact, the one prerequisite for entering the kingdom of God is an admission of failure; an acknowledgement of our sin, and inability, and spiritual bankruptcy. We realize that we cannot enter heaven through our good character or good works; we know that we are worthy only of condemnation, and that we are accepted and loved by God only because of the actions of another – our Savior, Jesus Christ, who gave his life to pay for our sin. In and of ourselves, we are all, every one of us, corrupt, guilty sinners. And so we have no standing to look down on anyone else, to judge or condemn anyone else. We can empathize with one another’s weaknesses and failings, because we ourselves are weak and prone to failure. That’s one of the keys to the success of Alcoholics Anonymous – they recognize their weakness, they know they’ve fallen, they’ve stripped away the pretense of moral superiority and self-sufficiency. And we could learn something from their commitment to absolute honesty.
Here’s the bottom line: we are loved and accepted and valued by God entirely because of Christ. Our worth comes from Him, and not from ourselves. And so we don’t need to pretend to be better than we are; we don’t need to put on a mask. What freedom, not to have to prove anything! Not to worry about impressing anyone with our holiness, not even God, but to be able openly to acknowledge who we are, with all our flaws and failings. What a relief!
Yet, we still lie. We lie when we fail to acknowledge our weaknesses, and failures, and struggles, and defeats. We lie when we pretend to know God better than we do. We lie when we attempt to give any kind of false impression – that we are outstanding prayer warriors, or greatly devoted to Christ, or brimming over with love and compassion, when the truth is otherwise. In short, we lie when we engage in hypocrisy for the purpose of deceiving others; whether we’re concealing our sins or exaggerating our accomplishments. And the greatest danger in this kind of deception is that we will end up deceiving ourselves. As the author Nathaniel Hawthorne wrote:
"No man, for any considerable period, can wear one face to himself and another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which one is true."
In other words, if we are continually trying to convince others that we are better than we are, we may actually come to believe that we are better than we really are. And that is hazardous to our spiritual health. Because walking with Christ requires an ongoing habit of repentance. And repentance requires a frank acknowledgement of our sin. Without that, we soon become proud, self-righteous, Pharisees.
Now, I’d like to draw back a bit, and talk about honesty in general. One of the reasons we fall so easily into falsehood in our speech and conduct is that lies are commonplace in the world around us. We are immersed in a culture of casual, everyday deceptions; both great and small, so that shading the truth has come to seem normal, even expected. For instance, when we read an advertisement for a new car that claims it represents a "revolution in automobile engineering," we dismiss it as hyperbole. We know that whatever the advertiser may claim, this car is likely to be fairly similar to what came before. When we visit an Olive Garden restaurant, we know that we aren’t really "family"; we’re just customers. When a Congressman or Senator goes on television to express outrage, or concern, or disappointment, we know that he or she probably feels nothing but ambition. When we read cell phone contracts, we look for the fine print. We respond with skepticism to people who claim to have our best interests at heart. And we certainly know now that, whatever the CEO’s may say, the management of many large corporations are looking out for themselves first, and not the employees or shareholders. Even Catholic priests can’t be granted unconditional trust. In short, we expect people to lie. As the actress Lily Tomlin once said, "No matter how cynical I get, I just can’t keep up." That’s why we have to guard our thoughts and our hearts, why we have to read our Bibles, so that over time, we will be transformed by the Word of God rather than be conformed to the world.
And that’s why the Scriptures say so much about the importance of honesty, about the sinfulness of lies and deceit. To warn us against falling into the world’s pattern. For example, from the Old Testament, we have verses like these:
"Do not steal. Do not lie. Do not deceive one another." – Leviticus 19:11
"Come, my children, listen to me; I will teach you the fear of the Lord. Whoever of you loves life and desires to see many good days, keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking lies." – Psalm 34:11-13
"The Lord detests lying lips, but he delights in men who are truthful." – Proverbs 22:12
In the New Testament, we see that God’s attitude toward lying hasn’t changed.
"You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness. Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body." – Ephesians 4:22-25
Lies and falsehood are simply incompatible with our identity as Christians. We must choose to put off falsehood and put on truthfulness; we must resist the temptation to deny or shade the truth. To do otherwise would be to deny who we are. We are in this world but not of it; we are new creatures made to be like God.
Why is honesty so important? First, because it reflects God’s character. As the children of God, when we act and speak in truth, we give testimony to the fact that God our Father is true; that Christ our Savior is true. In the book of Numbers, we read:
"God is not a man, that he should lie, nor a son of man, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill?" – Numbers 23:19
And Paul, in his letter to Titus, introduces himself in this way, "Paul, a servant of God and an apostle of Jesus Christ for the faith of God’s elect and the knowledge of the truth that leads to godliness--a faith and knowledge resting on the hope of eternal life, which God, who does not lie, promised before the beginning of time" – Titus 1:1-2
In the same way, Jesus says of himself, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." – John 14:6
When we uphold the truth, we are bearing witness to the absolute truthfulness and trustworthiness of the God we serve, the God who made us and to whom we belong. On the other hand, when we lie or practice deceit, we are denying Him. In fact, when we do that we are living as if our father were not God, but Satan. As Jesus said to the Pharisees,
". . . If God were your Father, you would love me, for I came from God and now am here. I have not come on my own; but he sent me. Why is my language not clear to you? Because you are unable to hear what I say. You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desire. He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies." – John 8:42-44
Honesty is also important because lies are alienating. They alienate us from God. They alienate us from ourselves, because they undermine the integrity and wholeness of our personality. And they alienate us from one another, by destroying the trust and confidence that are essential to community and essential to relationships. There are few things as destructive to a marriage, or a friendship, or a church than a pattern of lies and deceit. It is absolutely disastrous. Even when there is genuine repentance, it often takes years to rebuild trust once it is broken by lies.
Given all that, then why do we lie? For several reasons. We may do it to cover up or minimize our sin. We don’t want to face the consequences of our actions. We’ve done something wrong, and instead of coming clean and confessing our fault, we lie. The problem with this strategy, aside from the fact that it’s cowardly, is that it doesn’t work. Eventually, the truth will come out. All of our deeds, including those done in secret, will be made known. Even our heart attitudes and motivations will come to light:
"For there is nothing hidden that will not be disclosed, and nothing concealed that will not be known or brought out into the open." – Luke 8:17
"[J]udge nothing before the appointed time; wait till the Lord comes. He will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of men’s hearts." – 1 Corinthians 4:5
Not only that, but as long as we are maintaining this deception, we are in bondage. We are not free to fully reveal who we are; we are not free to relax and let down our guard. We have to conceal a part of ourselves, even from those closest to us. We are always living in fear of being found out, fear of being exposed, fear of being "outed". What a terrible way to live!
Or you may lie to advance an agenda, to accomplish a goal. What’s the matter with that? It means that you’re not trusting in God’s power. You think God can’t accomplish His purposes in your life unless you bend the rules. Or perhaps you’re not even concerned with God’s purposes, but only your own. And so you lie because you have to make things happen by your own power, using whatever means are necessary. Listen: if you believe that you are doing what God wants you to do, then you can trust in Him to accomplish His purposes through you, without the need for any lies or deception.
Or we may lie in order to look good. What’s wrong with that? Don’t we all want to be liked, esteemed, respected? What’s the harm in trying to impress people? For an answer, listen to this episode from the early days of the church:
"Now a man named Ananias, together with his wife Sapphira, also sold a piece of property. With his wife’s full knowledge he kept back part of the money for himself, but brought the rest and put it at the apostles’ feet.
Then Peter said, "Ananias, how is it that Satan has so filled your heart that you have lied to the Holy Spirit and have kept for yourself some of the money you received for the land? Didn’t it belong to you before it was sold? And after it was sold, wasn’t the money at your disposal? What made you think of doing such a thing? You have not lied to men but to God." When Ananias heard this, he fell down and died. And great fear seized all who heard what had happened. Then the young men came forward, wrapped up his body, and carried him out and buried him.
About three hours later his wife came in, not knowing what had happened. Peter asked her, "Tell me, is this the price you and Ananias got for the land?" "Yes," she said, "that is the price." Peter said to her, "How could you agree to test the Spirit of the Lord? Look! The feet of the men who buried your husband are at the door, and they will carry you out also." At that moment she fell down at his feet and died. Then the young men came in and, finding her dead, carried her out and buried her beside her husband. Great fear seized the whole church and all who heard about these events." – Acts 5:1-11
Friends, God takes lying very seriously. This story is not about money. It’s not about greed. Ananias and Sapphira were under no obligation to sell the land. And having sold it, they were under no obligation to give the entire proceeds to the church. Their sin was not in withholding part of the money; their sin was in falsely claiming that they had given it all to the church. They lied, and paid for it with their lives. Now, why do you suppose God judged them so severely? After all, they just wanted a little glory, a little praise, a little respect. And that’s the answer. Their motivation in selling the property and making the donation was not to bring honor, and glory, and praise to God, but to themselves. And God will not share his glory with another. If there is anything God hates and despises, it is a religious hypocrite; someone who pretends to be spiritual in order to receive the praise of men. This kind of hypocrisy, this kind of lying is simply intolerable to God. So if you are trying to gain a reputation for yourself as a spiritual person by exaggerating the quality of your devotion, or if you are engaging in any other form of hypocrisy or falsehood, beware. Listen to what the final outcome will be for those who continue to lie and who fail to repent:
"But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars--their place will be in the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death." – Revelation 21:8
In closing, I’d like to invite you to examine your heart. Think about your relationships. Where are you being less than honest with other people? Where are you shading the truth to avoid owning up to your sins and your failings? Are you presenting yourself to others as more "together" spiritually than you really are? Are you impersonating a disciple of Christ for the sake of others’ opinions, instead of just being a disciple of Christ? And are you being honest with yourself? Are you willing, not only to speak the truth to others, but to hear the truth from others?
Finally, are you being honest with God? Are you praying? Are you confessing your sins to him? Are you seeking his grace, and mercy, and forgiveness, or are you trying to earn his approval and acceptance by good works and good intentions? If so, then stop the charade. Stop pretending; stop trying to impress God. It won’t work; He already knows the best and the worst about you, and neither of them matter. All that matters is that you come to him in the name of his beloved son, Jesus Christ, that you trust in Christ for salvation. If that’s true, then you don’t need to pretend, you don’t need to be something you’re not. All you have to do is rest in his love. Won’t you do that today?
(For an .rtf file of this and other sermons, see www.journeychurchonline.org/messages.htm)
