WHAT MY FATHER TAUGHT ME
Exodus 20:12
S: Father’s Day
Th: Learning from Dad
Pr: We need to learn from our fathers.
?: What?
KW: Principles for life
TS: We are going to observe three biblical principles for life
that my father taught me.
The _____ principle for life that my father taught me is…
I. KEEP LEARNING
II. DON’T BE AFRAID OF CHANGE
III. BE A PERSON OF GRACE
RMBC 6/20/99 AM
INTRODUCTION:
1. What did your father teach you?
Our fathers taught us many things with their pithy sayings.
See if some of these seem familiar:
ILL Notebook: Father (and one day you’ll sound just like him)
Don’t ask me, ask your mother.
Close the door; were you raised in a barn?
Don’t worry; it’s only blood.
A little dirt never hurt anyone; just wipe it off.
Keep your eye on the ball.
This will hurt me a lot more than it will hurt you.
Do I look like I am made of money?
We’re not lost!
No, we’re not there yet.
As long as you live under my roof, you’ll live by my rules.
I’ll tell you why; because I said so, that’s why.
You throw like a girl.
I’m not sleeping; I was watching that show.
I’m not just talking to hear my voice.
Two wrongs don’t make a right.
What did I just get finished telling you?
Don’t make me stop this car!
Men are like buses; just wait on the corner and another one will come along.
What part of “no” don’t you understand?
If you’re gonna be dumb, you’ve gotta be tough.
2. We recognize that our fathers have communicated to us a tremendous amount of wisdom.
And some of us have been in a position to repeat it.
But here is some advice I don’t think you will ever hear:
ILL Notebook: Father (top 10 things you’ll never hear)
Here are the top 10 things you’ll never hear a dad say:
10) Well, how ‘bout that? I’m lost! Looks like we’ll have to stop and ask for directions.
9) You know Pumpkin, now that you’re thirteen, you’ll be ready for unchaperoned car dates. Won’t that be fun?
8) I noticed that all your friends have a certain hostile attitude. I like that.
7) Here’s a credit card and the keys to my new car. Go crazy!!
6) What do you mean you wanna play football? Figure skating is not good enough for you, son?
5) Your Mother and I are going away for the weekend. You might want to consider throwing a party.
4) Well, I don’t know what’s wrong with your car. Probably one of those doo-hickey thingies—ya know—that makes it run or something. Just have it towed to a mechanic and pay whatever her asks.
3) No son of mine is going to live under this roof without an earring. Now quit your belly-aching and let’s go to the mall.
2) Whaddya wanna go and get a job for? I make plenty of money for you to spend.
1) What do I want for Father’s Day? Aahh—don’t worry about that. It’s no big deal (actually they might say this, but they don’t mean it).
TRANSITION:
We want to recognize this morning that…
1. God has given us our fathers.
We all have biological fathers.
Others of us have someone who has stood in as a real father and did the “dad” things with us.
But we all have a heavenly Father who has demonstrated His love for us by solving our own personal addiction to sin.
He has accepted us as sons and daughters because He has accepted the work of His Son on our behalf.
As I reminded us on Mother’s Day last month…
2. God has given us instruction on how we are to treat our parents (Exodus 20:12).
We find the instruction in Exodus 20:12:
Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.
We are told to honor our parents.
The word “honor” means to show respect, to reverence, even to
hold in awe.
What this means to us is that, no matter what our age (since this
is a timeless command), we are to treat our fathers with high
esteem.
So I want to share with you the same conclusion I had last tune and that is…
3. We honor God by honoring our fathers.
We are giving respect to God when we respect our parents, and specifically today, our fathers.
This should inspire us to think differently than we have at times.
We may have the tendency to be critical.
Perhaps, our dad failed us in some way.
At the same time, we need to remember that that we have been for from perfect son or daughter.
So whatever the mistakes of the past, whether they are ours or our father’s, we are to honor our fathers today.
One of the ways we honor our fathers is by listening to them and learning from them.
4. WE NEED TO LEARN FROM OUR FATHERS.
Again, as on Mother’s Day, this is a personal message for me.
Because I want to share with you just a smidgen of what my father taught me.
I can’t tell you all that he taught me.
Neither should I tell you all that he should have taught me, which I threatened to do if he wasn’t nice to me.
But what we are going to do this morning is this…
5. We are going to observe three biblical principles for life that my father taught me.
OUR STUDY:
I. The first principle for life that my father taught me is to KEEP LEARNING (II Peter 3:18a).
ILL Notebook: Father (fathers know most)
A young boy was talking to his father about what little boys know and what their fathers know. The boy asked, “Do fathers always know more than their sons?” The boy’s father answered, “Yes.” The boy asked another question. “Who invented telephones?” Alexander Graham Bell,” his father replied. The boy then asked, “If fathers always know more that their sons, then why didn’t Alexander Graham Bell’s father invent the phone?”
You know, sometimes good theories just don’t work.
But regardless of whether we are fathers, mothers, sons or daughters (we all fall in there somewhere…), we are to keep learning.
This is reinforced by II Peter 3:18, where it says…
But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
1. We are to be students in God’s world.
ILL Notebook: Knowledge (microorganisms)
A woman had been assisting a young Sunday-school class with finger painting. As she escorted one solemn-eyed seven-year-old girl to the bathroom to wash her hands, she said to her, “We have to get the germie-wermies off. Do you know what germie-wermies are? “Yes,” replied the little girl, “microorganisms.”
Already at this young age, this little girl has proved to be a student.
And whether she realized it or not, she was a student of the world God had made.
My dad taught me the importance of education by his example.
I always thought it was interesting in my young childhood that though my dad was a bricklayer, on his shelves were books about Abraham Lincoln, World War II and Greek culture.
He was obviously a well-read man.
And he proved it when he decided to go back to school to go into teaching.
He showed me the importance of being a person of knowledge as he prepared for a new career as he was turning 40.
But dad’s pursuit of knowledge was hardly limited to the world of education.
He also pursued spiritual matters.
This turned into a most strategic act for his family, for…
2. We are to be seekers of God.
When I was very young, dad did not go to church with mom and me.
But one day, I came home after church and said, “Daddy, why don’t you go to church with us?”
He couldn’t come up with a good answer, so the next week, he came along.
It was not long till my dad became very interested in spiritual things, was involved in the church and was teaching a Sunday School class.
I often remember him sitting in his chair studying for his Sunday School class, a memory that continues for me right through my high school years.
But it was during this early time, that dad came to know the Lord in a personal way.
His study of God’s Word became more than just an interesting intellectual study.
The words became real.
They were the power of God and he began to live them.
It was then dad showed me that…
3. We are to be growing in our relationship with Jesus.
It was not long that the relationship dad had discovered with Jesus also became a reality for me as well.
And as I watched him grow, so did my desire to grow as well.
He was growing, hungry to know more of God’s Word and how to live in a culture that often rejected the truth.
So as he grew, he encouraged me to grow as well.
In my final year in high school, I came to the point that I willing to be used by God however He wanted to use me.
I was willing because I saw what high esteem my parents had for pastors, missionaries and other Christian workers, even though they made very little money (my home church proved that!).
To them, there was not a nobler profession.
And though they never once pressured me to go into full-time service, I began to consider such a calling with the same regard.
4. Are you a person that keeps learning?
We are to grow in our knowledge of the Lord Jesus.
As fathers, when we do that, we will instill a priority that cannot be ignored nor taken lightly.
When Jesus is our priority, we will demonstrate it, not only in our study, but in all of life.
II. The second principle for life that my father taught me is DON’T BE AFRAID OF CHANGE (Matthew 18:3).
ILL Notebook: Change (eat this root)
In 2000 BC, they said, “Here, eat this root.”
In the year 1000, they said, “That root is heathen. Here say this prayer.”
In the year 1850, they said, “That prayer is superstition. Here, drink this potion.”
In the year 1940, they said, “That potion is snake oil. Here, swallow this pill.”
In the year 1985, they said, “That pill is ineffective. Here take this antibiotic.”
In the year 1999, they are saying, “That antibiotic doesn’t work anymore. Here eat this root.”
Well…we have all heard the phrase, “The more things change, the more they stay the same.”
That certainly applies here.
The truth of the matter, though, is that…
1. We often find security in what is expected and traditional.
Sometimes we feel secure in knowing what is coming.
We like to keep things the same, because when they are, we have some feeling of control.
We should rejoice that some things don’t change.
For example, Jesus is the same yesterday, today and forever.
There is great comfort in that.
But on the other hand, there are some things that really need change, including our hearts.
Consider, for example, Matthew 18:3 when it says…
And he said: “I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.”
2. We must recognize that change is at the heart of the gospel.
Notebook: Change (feel the heat)
It has been said that some people change their ways when they see the light; others when they feel the heat.
This is something I watched in my dad.
He changed.
The gospel called on him to change…and he did.
In fact, he was transformed.
And as he got older, he got better.
He never settled in to being an ordinary Christian or an ordinary dad.
He always seemed to improve with age.
But if we are going to improve, we have to admit something.
We have to admit that we have not arrived.
We are not good enough yet.
We need change and more change.
Dad taught me what was true on an individual level was also true on the church level as well.
He taught me that…
3. We are to look for new ways to get the unchanging gospel message communicated (cf. I Corinthians 9:16-23).
(16) Yet when I preach the gospel, I cannot boast, for I am compelled to preach. Woe to me if I do not preach the gospel! (17) If I preach voluntarily, I have a reward; if not voluntarily, I am simply discharging the trust committed to me. (18) What then is my reward? Just this: that in preaching the gospel I may offer it free of charge, and so not make use of my rights in preaching it. (19) Though I am free and belong to no man, I make myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible. (20) To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. (21) To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God’s law but am under Christ’s law), so as to win those not having the law. (22) To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some. (23) I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings.
Contrary to popular opinion, the presentation of the gospel is not to remain static.
Yes, the message stays the same.
But the vehicle changes.
The style changes.
Why? To meet the needs of the audience.
This is what Paul is communicating in I Corinthians.
He is going to do whatever he can in order that by all possible means, he might save some.
My dad gave me some reassuring advice when I was first in the ministry.
I was in Little Falls at the time as the Youth Pastor, and I was facing a controversy (not my only one through the years I might add).
I had taken the kids to a Petra concert in Binghamton.
Most were fine with that, but there were some that thought I had gone the ways of the world.
But I do believe and continue to believe, that I was following the principles found in I Corinthians 9.
And I remember my dad backing me up on that.
In fact, as he was looking at the record jacket of several of my Petra albums, he said, the words on these songs are better than most of the hymns that we sing.
Now don’t misunderstand, dad didn’t necessarily like that style of music, but he honored the vehicle in order that some might be saved.
4. Are you a person that is willing for change?
The strength of this characteristic is that we are constantly looking for a better way.
We refuse to be satisfied with success.
For when we become satisfied with success, we become fat.
This aspect is very practical for those of us as fathers
When, we as fathers are willing to change, it is much easier to call on our sons and daughters to change as well.
Together, then, we can grow toward Christlikeness.
III. The third principle for life that my father taught me is BE A PERSON OF GRACE (I Peter 4:10).
1. We need grace for eternity’s sake (cf. Ephesians 2:8-9).
For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith, and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God not by works, so that no one can boast.
Without grace, we are without salvation.
There is no possible way we can gain access into God’s kingdom by our own efforts.
We are just can’t do it.
We are unable.
Only God can provide the way and it is our good fortune that He does.
He offers us this gift of unmerited favor, to receive by faith.
It comes by grace.
And when we receive it, it is the testimony of Scripture, we have eternal life!
But this is not the end of our need of grace.
2. On a day to day basis, we need grace practiced on our behalf.
We live in a culture that is dominated by individual rights.
The right of the individual is the ultimate principle.
So…we are always claiming for our rights.
Sometimes that bleeds right into the church and it is hardly ever good.
For what if we received what we really deserved.
ILL Notebook: Grace (Powlison)
David Powlison, one of my professors in seminary, has written this:
God’s grace is intended to change the people who receive it. There is something wrong with you. From God’s point of view, you not only need someone else killed in your place in order to be forgiven; you need to be transformed in order to be forgiven; you need to be transformed in order to be fit to live with. The word unconditional may be an acceptable way to express the welcome of God. But it fails to communicate the point of that welcome: a comprehensive and lifelong rehab, learning “holiness without which no one will see the Lord.” God does not accept me just as I am; He loves me despite how I am; He loves me just as Jesus is; He loves me enough to devote my life to renewing me in the image of Jesus. This love is much, much, much better than unconditional!
That is powerful.
Our need of grace is not a one time need.
It is our ongoing need.
This is a lesson that I learned in my early years as a Christian…
ILL Personal (dad and my bike ride)
When I was 12 years old, every day after school, a bunch of my friends and I would ride to somebody’s house on our bikes for our daily tackle football game. We loved to do this. There was 4-6 of us that would play every day and we were very intense about it. This was a daily ritual. All that had to be decided every day on our way home on the bus was where we were going to play. Usually, there wasn’t a problem. All my friends lived distances away that my parents said I could ride my bike. I could go to Larry’s house that lived down the road. I could go to Marks’s house that lived on Prole Rd. I could go to Bob’s house that lived on Mullen Rd. I could go to a different Larry’s house that lived on Horseshoe Lake Rd. I could go to any of their houses except Derf’s house (Derf, by the way, was really named Fred, but we called him Derf because that is what Fred is backwards). He lived on Rt. 33 just beyond the limits of where my parents said I could ride my bike. But you are probably already guessing what is going to happen, aren’t you? One day, the group decided we were going to play at Derf’s house. He was grounded, and so he couldn’t ride his bike, but he could play at his house. So off everybody went until I said that I couldn’t go there. After a long discussion and more peer pressure, I decided to go, with the hope that I would not be caught. But I wasn’t going to get caught. Even though I would be riding the route Dad would take home, it was too early in the day for him to be coming home. So there I was riding along Rt. 33, almost to Derf’s house and what do I see coming? You guessed it. Dad’s car with dad driving. I, of course, did the only sensible thing. I went for cover. I hurried with my bike up next to one of my friends, putting my friend between me and dad’s sight. And as he drove by, I turned to see if he saw me. And guess what? He did. He turned the car around and came up behind me on the bike. I stopped and told my friends to go on ahead without me. I remember one of them saying, encouragingly, “You’re dead.” I had to agree. Dad slowly got out of the car and walked up to me, and he said, “Isn’t this beyond the point where you are allowed to ride your bike?” “Yes.” “Then what are you doing here?” I confessed the whole thing, knowing that a well-deserved punishment was coming. Then there was the longest pause as I waited for the response. Dad finally said, “Well…I guess that now that you are 12, maybe you are old enough to be this far away from home…” I could hardly believe my ears. “Go ahead with your friends and I’ll explain it to mom before you get home.” Now when I showed up at the football game, my friends were stunned. They couldn’t believe I wasn’t in trouble. Neither could I. But they were all of the same mind. They all wished they had a dad like mine.
Do you know what I learned that day?
I learned grace.
I did not receive what I did deserve.
What I did receive, I did not deserve.
And it was that day, dad taught me the power of grace.
3. We need to be people of grace in order to serve others.
Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God’s grace in its various forms.
We have the opportunity to administer God’s grace all the time.
People do not always deserve it.
That doesn’t matter though.
Neither do we.
So we serve.
We serve up grace at every opportunity.
4. Are you a person of grace?
Or are you a person of law?
When we are a person of grace, we demonstrate that we are growing in grace and toward Christlikeness.
As fathers, it is easy to mete out justice.
Sometimes we must do it.
But perhaps more often we ought to administer grace, and demonstrate to our children what God is doing for us, day after day.
APPLICATION:
Let me repeat what I said earlier…
1. We honor God by honoring our fathers.
Today is a good day to get started on that if you have not been.
Take the time to learn from them as I have attempted to do today.
2. What have you learned from your father?
I have shared with you what I have learned.
I learned that I must keep learning.
I learned that I should be willing for change.
And I learned that there is no more powerful lesson that meeting a person of grace.
What have you learned?
And more importantly…
3. What have you applied?
BENEDICTION:
Honor your father today…recognize that God gave him to you and even though he has his weaknesses, he is to be an object of your respect;
Honor your father today…examine his life and learn from him, both positively and negatively, and determine to live a life that will be pleasing to your heavenly father;
And finally…be a student of God’s Word, be a student that is willing for the change God needs to bring to you, so that you too can be a person of grace.
Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.
