Foundations of the Family: Restoring the Foundations
Malachi 2:14-17
Over the next few Sunday evenings, I want to bring a series of messages on ’Restoring the Foundations’. The family is under attack from the enemy in every area. From this study I hope we will develop a biblical view of family pressure and problems. We must understand that the root of our problems lie in disobedience to God’s principles. We must understand God’s plan for the family and only consider biblical solutions to our problems.
Spiritual warfare - the problem is not people; it is not our mate, parent, or child.
We must see the Satanic forces behind the conflicts.
Satan’s attack is to separate us from God.
Once we are separated from God it is easy to separate us from each other.
Psalms 11:3, "If the foundations be destroyed, what can the righteous do?"
The two-fold purpose of this series is presented for us in Is. 58:12. " And they that shall be of thee shall build the old waste places: thou shalt raise up the foundations of many generations; and thou shalt be called, The repairer of the breach, The restorer of paths to dwell in."
1. Repairer - to wall up.
Nehemiah was burdened about his people because the walls of the city were destroyed and they were defenseless.
We need to be concerned about repairing God’s walls of protection for our families.
2. Restorer - to turn back (the idea of returning to the starting point).
I. Reason For The Rebuke (Verse 14)
A. Covering sin (treacherously).
1. Treacherously means to act covertly, deceitfully, unfaithful.
2. There was not honesty and faithfulness in the marriage relationship.
B. Companion - God’s will.
1. Once two people say, "I do" if it wasn’t God’s will before, it becomes God’s will after the marriage.
2. Some people say, "I was out of God’s will when I married, so..."
3. That may or may not be true, but God would not have us to do wrong in order to try to do right.
C. Covenant - vows of free will.
1. God holds us to our vows because we make them of our free will.
2. He warns us to be careful in making vows.
"When thou vowest a vow unto God, defer not to pay it; for he hath no pleasure in fools: pay that which thou hast vowed. Better is it that thou shouldest not vow, than that thou shouldest vow and not pay." cf Eccl. 5:4-5 3. We need to take responsibility for our decision and humble ourselves before God to seek His grace in helping us fulfill our vows.
II. Rejection Of The Plan (Verse 15)
A. Spiritual - Unity/oneness between a husband and wife.
1. Unity can only be produced by God’s spirit.
2. That is true in a local church, and it is true in a family as well.
"I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called, With all lowliness and meekness, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love; Endeavouring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace." cf Ep 4:1-3
B. Seed - Godly generation to serve and glorify.
1. One of God’s purposes in marriage is to develop a foundation of Godly generations that will serve and glorify Him.
2. Often today we are left with fragments of families instead of a foundation.
C. Spiritual sensitivity - guarding our hearts.
III. Running From The Problem (Verse 16)
A. Putting away - effects on Godly generations.
1. ’Putting Away’ = divorce
2. Divorce greatly affects the children and those effects may be passed on for generations.
3. Divorce is not the answer to problems in a marriage!
4. The answer lies in the forgiveness of Christ.
B. Pretending - covereth violence with his garment.
1. When a man covers a woman with is garment it was a symbol of his willingness to protect and provide for her.
2. This was illustrated by Boaz in the book of Ruth. cf Ruth 3:9
3. The reality was that these men who promised to protect their wives were bringing harm to them.
IV. Repentance Required (Verse 17)
A. The problems of no repentance.
1. When there has been no true repentance over sin it creates a lack of balance in our life.
2. This produces one of two problems for people, especially those in a position of leadership.
a. justify - we become so loose in our sense of righteousness that we call evil good in order to justify ourselves.
b. judgmental - In another attempt to justify ourselves we become judgmental in our spirit: By focusing on, and exposing others, we do not need to face our own sin.
B. Proper response - repentance.
1. A change of mind that results in a change of action.
2. We will continue to have problems in our nation, churches, and homes until we are open to repairing and restoring the foundations.
What about the foundations of our families. Are there some things that we must do to repair or rebuild? Will we be honest with God and with ourselves in this matter?
Foundations of the Family: A Place to Begin Again
I Timothy 1:5-17
Last week we began a series of messages concerning the importance of restoring the foundations of our families.
*The foundation: Malachi 2:14-17
*The foundation - destroyed.
1. Sin nature (Mark 10:5-6).
The reality of life is that we live in a sinful world.
Many people are hurt by the sin of others and left with tough choices.
Mark 10:5-6 shows us that God does not lower His standards, but He shows us how to deal with the reality of sin.
2. Satan’s attack.
When we yield to Satan’s temptation to sin he fills our life with guilt, depression, and loss of hope
He tells us that we have missed God’s best, that it is to late to get right, or that we might as well give up.
These are all lies.
*The foundation - restored.
1. Grace meets us where we are (I Timothy 1:9-11, 14)
2. Although there are certain realities and consequences of sin we must face, it is never too late to start over with God.
3. God can give us a new plan and a new will from this point on in our lives.
I. Deal With The Past
A. Confess sin (verse 13)
1. Remove guilt and accept respons- ibility.
a. No one is totally innocent.
b. The question, "Where were we wrong?" must be answered.
c. Did we make a bad decision years earlier out of ignorance or rebellion to some authority?
2. Root issues help us understand why.
a. All of life’s problems can be traced back to four basic root problems:
1) self-image, 2) bitterness, 3) moral impurity, 4) temporal value system.
b. We have problems in life because we try to get our basic needs met in wrong ways.
3. The results of not confessing - verse 6 and 7.
a. We become unfruitful for God
b. We turn away from God while deceiving ourselves into thinking we are still serving Him.
c. We are no longer spiritually discerning.
B. Clear conscious (verse 5).
1. Zaccheus illustrated this concept.
2. He was willing to make restoration to all those he had wronged.
C. Accept forgiveness (verse 15).
1. Claim I John 1:9.
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9)
2. Accept God’s forgiveness, and be ready and willing to forgive others.
D. Accept realities - change and limitations and consequences.
1. Things may never be the same.
2. Sin does change things, but they can still be good or even better.
3. We cannot change the past, but we can learn form it to give us a better tomorrow.
II. Directions For The Present
A. Recommitment - God’s way.
1. The evidence of true brokenness is: that we do not argue with God
2. We do not put any conditions on God
3. And we are not bitter when it comes to consequences of our sin.
B. Replace regret with rejoicing.
1. Regret comes from only seeing the consequences of our sin in our life and in the life of others.
2. David experienced this in regards to the death of Absaolom.
“And the king was much moved, and went up to the chamber over the gate, and wept: and as he went, thus he said, O my son Absalom, my son, my son Absalom! would God I had died for thee, O Absalom, my son, my son!” (2 Sam 18:33)
3. Rejoicing is a result of seeing that our sin is against God and that He will forgive the repentant.
4. David also experienced this.
“Against thee, thee only, have I sinned, and done this evil in thy sight: that thou mightest be justified when thou speakest, and be clear when thou judgest.” (Psa 51:4) “Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. Make me to hear joy and gladness; that the bones which thou hast broken may rejoice.” (Psa 51:7-8)
5. We must channel the past in a positive way.
6. Learn from it and use the conse- quences of past mistakes (our hall of shame) to reinforce our present right commitments.
C. Retrain and rebuild by replacing negatives with positives.
“To reveal his Son in me, that I might preach him among the heathen; immediately I conferred not with flesh and blood: Neither went I up to Jerusalem to them which were apostles before me; but I went into Arabia, and returned again unto Damascus. Then after three years I went up to Jerusalem to see Peter, and abode with him fifteen days.” (Gal 1:16-18)
1. God will have a new will for us.
2. He wants our lives to be fruitful for Him.
III. Determination For The Future
A. New beginning - starting now.
We have two choices.
1. One is to live in defeat of the past.
2. The other is to allow God to change our life and from now on make it count for God.
B. New purpose - verse 16.
1. It is never too late to be a godly pattern for others to follow.
2. Again, we cannot change the past, but we can determine to be what God would have us be today.
C. New motivation (verse 17).
1. Make our only motive to glorify God through our life by whatever means God chooses.
2. Our motivation should not be what we want or think.
Are we serious about getting our nation back to God? What about revival in our church? It all starts by restoring the foundation of our families. For us to do so means that we must
1) deal with the past
2) have positive direction for the present, and
3) determine to honor and glorify God in the future.
