INTRODUCTION
Sermonic Theme
Notation: Today we will be taking a break from our Parables of Jesus series to celebrate love and marriage. I cannot miss this opportunity to address one of the most critical subjects of all…loving someone.
Opening Statement: Perhaps, our musicians who seem to be enamored by love underscore this the most. But even then, there seems to be some confusion on what love is and what we should do with love. Elvis sang, “I can’t help falling in love with you.” Tina Turner sings, “What’s love got to do with it.” And what about the movies? From “Sleepless in Seattle” to “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs,” we are all led to believe that love is something that we fall into and live happily ever after. Many of the movies that we watch come from Hollywood, CA. I’ve driven through there and believe me; it’s not that impressive. In fact, it’s a little disappointing. And what about our poetry? We tell our beloved how we would climb high mountains to be near them, swim wide oceans, cross deserts in the burning heat of day, and even sit at their window and sing love songs to them in the moonlight, but when it comes to doing the dishes, all of sudden, we’ve been on our feet too long today and can’t quite muster up enough gusto to knock those dishes out.
Quotation: Poet Samuel Daniel, a contemporary of Shakespeare, said, "Love is a sickness full of woes, all remedies refusing." Love is the universal topic of writers, poets and singers. It is the subject of both highbrow literature and the lowly country song.
Observation: Everyone admits that love is wonderful and necessary, yet no one agrees on just what it is. If our songs, movies and poems (as interesting and entertaining to listen to, watch, and read as they are), are any indication, most of us don’t really know what love is; we confuse real love with other experiences and emotions. Consequently, we have no basis on which to evaluate the relationships we pursue and the decisions we make in search of real love.
Key Word: What we need—and what we most want to hear-- is a realistic and Biblical understanding of true love. So let me suggest to you first what love is not, and then I’ll try to show you what love is.
Title: Real Love
Proposition:
Text: John 3:16; 15:13
Recitation: 3:16 For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. 15:13 No one has greater love than this—that one lays down his life for his friends.
Sermon
Opening Statement: You weren’t expecting it. You never saw it coming. You were minding your own business when it happened. You were standing in front of your locker at school, just talking with your friends, when all of a sudden the door opened and --WHAM! BAM! SHAZAAM! -- through the door walked your dream come true, a combination of all the posters hanging on your bedroom wall, the embodiment of all your fantasies, the fulfillment of all your hopes, and you knew, like you never knew anything before, that you were in love, that here was the person you would marry, that you had just met. . . .your destiny!
Transition: That’s how it’s supposed to happen, right? That’s what love looks like, right? That’s how people fall in love, right? Love at first sight is not a miracle. It’s when two people have been looking at each other for years that it becomes a miracle.
Observation: Everyone wants to love and be loved. And at this point in your lives, there may be nothing as powerful as that desire. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. Without it, life would be, at best, incomplete--at worst, desperate. The yearning to give and receive love throbs in the heart of everyone, male and female alike. That’s the way God designed us. He placed the need for relationship inside each of us. People try in many different ways to discover true love, real love, a love that is strong and deep, a love that lasts for all time. Yet the pursuit of love has caused more heartache and pain, more brokenness and bitterness, than all the diseases and all the wars of history. A lot of people struggle mightily to understand what love is and how they can find it. Many are willing to give almost anything in order to experience love.
Transition:
OUTLINE
What Love Is Not
Real love isn’t the same as lust. Love gives; lust takes. Love values; lust uses. Love endures; lust subsides.
Real love isn’t the same as romance. Some couples experience emotional fireworks when they kiss. Some guys can speak words that make a girl feel so good inside. Some girls can make a guy feel taller and stronger than anyone else, just by looking into his eyes. Candlelight dinners, mood music, slow dances, and starry skies can make a moment special. Romance can be wonderful, but it’s not love. Romance is a feeling; real love is much more.
Real love isn’t the same as infatuation. Infatuation is a fascination with--an intense interest in--someone. It can leave a young man or woman feeling breathless, lightheaded, starry-eyed, and addle-brained! One author describes infatuation as: You fall for someone, you beguile yourself into believing yourself deeply in love with this person round whom your dreams revolve, you believe yourself ready to renounce your absorption with self for the sake of the well-being of this other person. Then, one morning, you wake up to discover that the euphoria has evaporated in the night. What is more, you find yourself held captive by identical feelings for another person. When people talk about “falling in love,” or about “love at first sight,” they are usually talking about infatuation. Infatuation can be an overwhelming feeling; but it is not real love.
Real love is not just being physical with someone. Love is a process; sex is an act. Love is learned; sex is instinctive. Love requires constant attention; sex takes no effort. Love takes time to develop and mature; sex needs no time to develop. Love requires emotional and spiritual interaction; sex requires only physical interaction. Love deepens a relationship; sex (operating alone) dulls a relationship--and will often end up killing it. Real love is not the same as lust, romance, infatuation, or sex.
What Love Is
Love more than any other thing is sacrifice. God so loved that He gave; He laid down His life…
Explanation: Unconditional love is a laying down and giving up of one’s life. God’s love caused him to give his best for us. True love is not revealed by empty words but through deeds and real sacrifices. People give gifts and money to express their love but no one would give their only child to die for the sins of someone else. God gave the greatest donation possible for the salvation of mankind. Love then, as modeled by God, is the giving of self, and is synonymous with sacrifice. Love always pays a price. Love always costs something. Love is expensive. When you love, benefits accrue to another’s account. Love is for someone else, not for me. Love gives; it doesn’t grab.
Application:
Sacrificial love is silence—when your words would hurt.
Sacrificial love is patience—when your neighbor’s curt.
Sacrificial love is deafness—when a scandal flows.
Sacrificial love is thoughtfulness—for other’s woes.
Sacrificial love is promptness—when stern duty calls.
Sacrificial love is courage—when misfortune falls.
Illustrations: The mother who sits up all night nursing her sick child does not call it hardship or sacrifice, but love. The husband who stays with an ailing wife as her health continues to deteriorate does not call it a sacrifice, but an honor and a privilege to stand by and love the one who made his life possible. The wife who gives and gives and gives, so her husband can accomplish a lifelong dream does not call it sacrifice, but love. Much of our love today is conditional. One lady wrote: "Dearest Jimmy, No words could ever express the great unhappiness I’ve felt since breaking our engagement. Please say you’ll take me back. No one could ever take your place in my heart, so please forgive me. I love you, I love you, I love you! Yours forever, Marie... P.S., And congratulations on winning the state lottery."
CONCLUSION
Quotation: Mother Teresa, when asked how she had accomplished such great things in her life said this, "None of us can do anything great on our own, but we can all do a small thing with great love."
Illustration: Show Robertson McQuilkin Video.
Recitation:
A Wall Or Bridge
They say a wife and husband, bit by bit,
Can rear between themselves a mighty wall,
So thick they cannot speak with ease through it,
Nor can they see across it, it stands so tall.
Its nearness frightens them, but each alone
Is powerless to tear its bulk away;
and each dejected wishes he had known
[Through] such a wall, some magic thing to say.
So let us build with master art, my dear,
A bridge of love between your life and mine,
A bridge of tenderness, and very near,
A bridge of understanding, strong and fine.
Till we have formed so many lovely ties,
There never will be room for walls to rise.
Source unknown
