Disciples Are Like Their Teacher … They Forgive
Genesis 50:15-21; Matthew 18:25-35
I stumbled upon a copy of a letter that I had written back in college. It’s somewhat funny that I should find it now, because it tells of an event in my life that … well, I think I’ll just read it aloud to you.
September 13
Dear Joy,
I know that I have already apologized to you and that you have forgiven me. I can’t tell you how awful I feel about the whole incident, and I want to make sure there are no questions in your mind about what happened. I treasure our friendship too much for there to be any barriers between us.
I would just like to say a few things about what happened, though. For starters, yesterday was just a very bad day. I was having to make sure that everything was set up for the concert, and meanwhile the only thing that was going through my head was that I have to write two papers in less than two weeks.
Lots of little things happened that day to drive me crazy, too. Nothing seemed to be going right! Do you know how sometimes you wish that you could relive a day? Well, yesterday was one of those days.
I would not normally wish that unless something else happened, though. No matter how rotten I have been treated during a day, I would not relive it except for this: it effected my friends. Yesterday was such a day. Of all the things that happened yesterday, one terrible event sticks in my mind:
Time out. Let me interrupt for a moment. I’ve read much of the letter, and I would like for you to help me a little. What do you think happened? How many of you think the two of us were supposed to study for a test and I did not show up, and therefore she failed it? Do you all know Joy? How do you know she is much smarter than me?
All right. How many think that Joy and I were supposed to go on a date and that I canceled at the last minute because Meg Ryan was in town and wanted to go out with me? How many think I am dreaming? Put your hands down!
Could it be possible for me to forget Joy’s birthday and also forget to get her the new Gardner-Webb sweatshirt I had promised to buy her? How many of you think that Joy and I got into a fight; I said something I shouldn’t have; Joy got mad at me and said she would never speak to me again? OK.
Do you want to know what happened? Listen: Of all the things that happened yesterday, one terrible event sticks in my mind: Hitting you smack upside the head with a piece of ice. That’s it? Were you expecting something else?
I had just spilled a drink (again, after dropping pizza on my pants twice, and numerous other things). I just was throwing some ice out of a cup, when I hit you. I can laugh at myself when my clumsiness effects me, but not when I hurt someone else. Thank you so much for being understanding, and I hope you will indeed forgive me.
Love in Christ,
Michael
Well, the story does have a happy ending. Joy did forgive me, after all it was an honest mistake. Most of us would do the same, too. But you see forgiveness goes beyond accepting apologies from those who make an honest mistake and hurt you.
Earlier in the service I read some scripture about Joseph and his brothers. Joseph’s brothers had been jealous of Joseph practically all of their lives. Their father Jacob loved Joseph more than them and even made him a cool coat. Joseph had a few dreams, too, that made his brothers furious. Joseph said to them, “I dreamed last night that we were in a field and that you bowed down to me on your knees.” And on another occasion, “Last night I dreamed that the sun, the moon, and the stars bowed down to me.”
It was at this point that Joseph’s brothers pretty much wanted to kill him. They decided instead to sell Joseph into slavery and tell their father Jacob that he had been devoured by a wild animal. Jacob was horrified while his son Joseph was in a difficult situation making the adaptation from being adored by all to being a slave.
Remember the dreams? Because of a gift of interpreting dreams, Joseph went from being a slave to became on officer of Pharaoh and governor of the land. Joseph knew that a famine was about to occur which would last seven years and was made responsible for distributing grain. During the famine, it so happened that Joseph’s brothers were desperately in need of food. They came before Joseph and bowed to him requesting food, not knowing that he was their brother. Remember the dreams? What was Joseph’s response?
What would you do if your brothers sold you as a slave because they were jealous? At first they wanted to kill you! Instead you were forced to become a slave and even imprisoned because of your brothers. Is your response to them to provide for them when they have nothing? They took your freedom, but you gave them life instead. That is forgiveness!
In the movie, The Man in the Moon, a family with two daughters just moved onto a farm. Moreen was around 17 and Danny was about 13. Danny, the youngest daughter, went down to the swimming hole in the woods to swim by herself only to find that someone else was already there. He was the cutest boy she had ever seen. Danny introduced herself and found out his name was Cort. They began to play and have fun in the water and the two of them had a great time together. They even kissed. Danny was in love. You could tell it when you looked at her across the dinner table because she wore a huge smile on her face.
On the other hand, Cort thought it was just an innocent experience and nothing more. And when Cort met the older sister, Moreen, who happened to be closer to his own age, he, too, fell in love, but with Moreen. Cort decided to pursue this new love interest. The younger sister, Danny, could not believe what was happening; her heart was broken. Obviously, this caused a rift between the two sisters. Moreen felt that Cort was too old for her younger sister Danny, while Danny felt betrayed by her older sister Moreen.
Then bad news came to the farm house. It seems that while Cort was plowing the field, he fell of the tractor and was killed. Both sisters had lost someone dear to them. At first they did not talk to each other; they didn’t even want to be around each other. But they knew they needed each other.
Jacob died. Joseph and his brothers were without their father. What did the future hold? Would Joseph seek revenge for what his brothers did to him now that their father was dead? When Joseph had every right to seek vengeance instead he spoke kindly to them. Joseph knew that his brothers would not be able to survive without his help. Instead of doing what was within his rights, he chose to do the right thing.
Joseph was certain that God had already forgiven his brothers. If God has forgiven someone then we have no choice but to forgive them also. So what if they hurt us? We shouldn’t worry about our egos, but instead on what God wants to accomplish through us. In our relations with others are we worried about our feelings, our rights, and our pride? Joseph was not. Do we view our lives as most important, or rather as a part of God’s plans? Is our attitude, “Even though you intended to do harm to me, God intended it for good, “ or “You just wait until I get you back?”
I know what it should be. If the Christian community does not display forgiveness then who will? Peter, the founder of the Church, knew this and asked Jesus, “How often should I forgive? As many as seven times?” You see the Jewish rabbis taught to forgive three times and found their reasoning in the book of Amos. It is there God gave Israel three warnings before punishing them for the fourth offense. Surely if God could only forgive three times, then no human could be more gracious than God. But Peter was catching on to the teachings of Jesus. He doubled the number of times to forgive someone and even added one for good measure. “Seven times, Jesus?” Jesus responded, “Seventy times seven, Peter.”
It’s like the time when you were a kid and were arguing with your friend over who had more toys. “I have 47.” “Well, I have 47 times 47.” “Well, I have 47 times 47 times 47.” “Uh-uh, I have 47 trillion, 47 gazillion, billion, million.” You should forgive infinitely.
The Christian community should not only show grace and forgiveness, we must do it. Or will we be like the servant of the king who was released from a debt of 10,000 talents, but threw a fellow slave into prison because he could not pay a debt of 100 denarii?
The servant owed 10,000 talents. Do you know how much that is? During New Testament times the total revenue of Galilee was 300 talents. Herod’s total annual income was 900 talents. The other servant owed 100 denarii, or just over three months salary.
HRS Kennedy gives a brilliant picture to contrast the two amounts. 100 denarii could fit in your pocket. But it takes 8,200 people carrying 60 lb. sacks to equal 10,000 talents.
Let’s also look at some modern day equivalents. 100 denarii would equal $3200. 10,000 talents would equal - are you ready for this? - nearly four trillion dollars!
“The point is that nothing that others could do to us can in any way compare with what we have done to God.” (William Barclay)
Becky had just gotten back from a week at camp with the other youth from her church. She had a great time and had learned a great deal. Becky’s youth minister announced to the youth group that on Sunday night, they would have an opportunity to share with the congregation about their experiences at camp. Sunday night came and Becky felt impressed to tell about her week, but she was also a bit nervous. After being reassured by her youth minister she finally got up enough courage to follow through with her decision.
When her time came to talk, Becky stood behind the pulpit. Tears were trickling down her face. She began to speak, “I have been a Christian for three years now. I know that Jesus loved me enough to die on the cross, but I did not really know what that meant until I spent a week at camp. One of the speakers talked about the suffering Christ went through so that we might have forgiveness. That night I made a promise to God that I would always forgive people whether they deserved it or not; and whether they asked for it or not. You see, that is the secret of forgiveness. You will never forgive anyone more than God has already forgiven you.”
Are we like the servant who refused to forgive? No, Michael, I forgive. In fact I forgave one of my friends this week. He borrowed my tools, and broke my brand new cordless power saw. I told him not to worry about it and it would not be that hard to fix. I forgave him, but I’ll never let him borrow anything of mine ever again.
Is that forgiveness? Am I missing something? I thought when you forgave someone, that was the end of the story. The incident wasn’t forgotten, it does not exist any more. It has been sent away as far as the east is from the west. Gone forever.
Forgiveness is not accepting the apology of someone else; it has everything to do with how you treat others. Do you treat people like they deserve to be treated, or do you treat them like God treats you and show mercy to them unconditionally? When you are with someone does that time they wronged you always stay in the back of your mind? Or does that time exist at all?
In his book, What’s So Amazing About Grace?, Philip Yancey talks about visits he got from his friend Mel. Mel was a Christian who wrote for people like Pat Robertson, Billy Graham, and Jerry Falwell. At the time, Philip lived in Chicago and in a particular neighborhood where there were a lot of residents lived an alternative lifestyle. Philip would tell Mel jokes making fun of those people, he would tell stories of their parade that actually marched down their street. One day Philip met Mel at a Marriott for lunch. Mel sat down, took a deep breath and said, “Philip, you’ve probably already figured out that I’m gay.” Actually, Philip had no clue. He didn’t think he had any gay friends; the idea repulsed him. Now he finds out the truth about one of his best friends.
In an attempt to understand his friend better, Philip talked with other persons like Mel. All of them told tales of rejection, hatred and persecution. Most had been called names and beaten up too many times to count. Half of the people had been disowned by their families. Some Christians say, “Yes, we should treat them with compassion but at the same time we must give them a message of judgment.” Philip realized that every person living an alternative lifestyle has heard the message of judgment from the church – again and again, and nothing but judgment.
Mel got a letter from one man that said, “I truly pray that one day, you will truly repent, truly desire freedom from the sin that enslaves you. If you don’t, thankfully you will receive what you deserve, an eternity in Hell, reserved for all who are enslaved to sin and refuse to repent.”
A TV interviewer asked Mel’s parents, “You know what other Christians are saying about your son. They say he’s an abomination. What do you think about that?” “Well,” the mother said, “he may be an abomination, but he’s still our pride and joy.” In some ways we are all abominations to God, and yet somehow, against all reason, God loves us anyhow; we are still God’s pride and joy. Jesus proved this by becoming friends with a prostitute, a tax collector who exploited, a woman with serial husbands, and all of the other untouchables of his day.
But for some reason as Christians we don’t care about those who live alternative lifestyles that are made fun of, beaten, discriminated against, that acquire diseases. The opinion of many of us is: “They get what they deserve.” Well, I sure don’t want what I deserve. Do you want what you deserve? We are judging them! Instead of Christians having an influence on those who need us most, we blast them. In one hand we are accepting the grace of God for our own lives, but in the other we have seized people by the throat, saying, “Pay up!”
The wicked slave was imprisoned because he would not forgive. So my heavenly Father will also do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother or sister with your whole heart. With your whole heart, just like you love God, that is how you are to treat others and to forgive.
