GENUINE EXPRESSIONS OF LOVE
II Cor. 6:3-13
INTRO.- Genuine expressions of love.
ILL.- A man at work decided to show his wife how much he loved her, and before going home, showered, shaved, put on some choice cologne, and bought her a bouquet of flowers. He went to the front door and knocked. His wife answered the door and exclaimed, "Oh no! This has been a terrible day! First I had to take Billy to the emergency room and get stitches in his leg. Then your mother called and said she’s coming to visit for 2 weeks. Then the washing machine broke, and now this! You come home drunk!"
Genuine expressions of love. At least, that husband tried.
ILL.- A man came home from work one day very tired, but his eyes lighted up as he stepped inside his house and saw a beautiful cake with seven candles on it setting on the kitchen table. He exclaimed, "A birthday cake! Whose birthday is it?"
"Oh," his wife replied nonchalantly, "the cake is for the dress I’m wearing. IT’S SEVEN YEARS OLD TODAY."
Genuine expressions of love. Cakes and seven-year-old dresses. Brand new dresses, for sure.
Genuine expressions of love could be lots of things. Material gifts, but much more.
ILL.- A number of years ago, U.S. Senator Jake Garn of Utah did something that most of us admire - HE DONATED ONE OF HIS ORGANS TO SAVE A LIFE.
A survey says that 73 percent of Americans approve of organ donation, but only about 20 percent actually sign donor cards and make arrangements for the donation of our organs.
In Senator Garn’s case, however, he did not wait until his death to donate his left kidney. His 27 year-old daughter, Susan Garn Horne, suffered from progressive kidney failure due to diabetes.
Jake Garn and his two sons were all found to be compatible donors. The senator insisted that he should be the one to give the kidney. Garn said, "Her mother carried her for nine months and I’m honored to give her part of me."
So, on Sept. 10, 1986, in a Washington hospital, a six-hour surgery was performed to remove one of his kidneys and implant it into his daughter. BOTH WERE FINE AFTER SURGERY.
A doctor reported after the surgery, "The senator is awake and has a bit of a grin on his face. HE SEEMS VERY SELF-SATISFIED, HAPPY AND PEACEFUL."
Talk about a genuine expression of love! Great! Fantastic!
Genuine expressions of love. Have you given out any lately? To whom and what were they? Verbal expressions? Material expressions? Physical expressions? Action expressions?
PROP.- From our text in II Cor. 6, I would like for us to consider some genuine expressions of love.
1- Avoid being offensive
2- Attend to others
3- Speak your love
I. AVOID BEING OFFENSIVE
ILL.- A college professor said to his students, "If there are any dumbbells in the rooms, please stand up." There was a pause and a lone freshman stood up at the back of the room. The professor said, "What? Do you consider yourself a dumbbell?" The student replied, "Well, not exactly, but I hate to see you standing all alone."
Calling someone a dumbbell or a dummy would be offensive, but there are worse things that could be said which would be offensive.
ILL.- While working in a retail store not too many years ago something happened that really "ticked me off." It was the day after Thanksgiving. AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS IN RETAIL BUSINESS? It means big business! Lots of people. Lots of customers. And no rest for retailers.
The manager and I and several other employees were in the customer service booth when suddenly an associate/employee asked me in front of everyone if we had any more of a certain product. I paused a moment and then told her that I couldn’t remember. Suddenly, the manager, who was much younger than I was, jumped on me with both feet. That is, he jumped all over me and chewed me out in front of everyone because I couldn’t remember. "You mean to tell that you can’t remember?" blah, blah, blah.
He did not take into account my age nor the fact that I was disabled mentally. (That’s a joke!) Seriously, he let me "have it" in front of everyone. AND I WAS GREATLY OFFENDED!
I just walked away. He knew he had blown it. And later he came around trying to make up in his own way for what he said to me and how he said it. And I let him know in no uncertain terms that he was wrong. His approach was wrong.
He may not have been wrong for reprimanding me for my poor memory, but how he was reprimanded me was totally wrong. HE OFFENDED ME, BUT I GOT OVER IT. I reconciled and even prayed for him.
Brothers and sisters, watch your words! Watch your words. Don’t be offensive with your words, because you may have to eat them! Don’t be confrontational. Not only will you offend people, but you will also end up picking on someone who is bigger than you some day.
And some day you will get your "come uppins" or whatever you want to call it. And it won’t be pleasant! Don’t be offensive. Watch your words. Watch what you say and how you say it.
II Cor. 6:3 "We put no stumbling block in anyone’s path, so that our ministry will not be discredited."
The Living Bible reads, "We try to live in such a way that no one will ever be offended or kept back from finding the Lord by the way we act."
The apostle Paul did not have an attitude nor need an attitude adjustment. He did think or act, "Well, I’m going to do as I please. I’m going to do and say what I want, no matter what others may think."
That’s the attitude that some people have. They don’t care who they hurt or how they hurt others.
Whenever we go around cutting people down verbally, we are not loving them. We are being offensive. LOVE DOES NOT PURPOSELY OFFEND OTHERS.
Avoid being offensive to others. WATCH YOUR MOUTH. Watch your words. Watch what you say and how you say it.
Prov. 10:19 "When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise."
Watch your steps as well. We offend with our words and our actions.
Rom. 14:13 "Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother’s way."
Paul did want to be offensive. He was willing to give up things in his life if he considered them to be a stumbling block to others. The principle is this: If we love people genuinely we’ll eliminate things in our lives that might keep them from following Christ.
ILL.- When a young couple gets married, it doesn’t take long before they find out things about one another that are offensive and obstacles to their love. Such as: "Don’t talk with your mouth full." "Don’t pick at your toenails and leave the whatever on the carpet." "Quit digging at your nose." "Stop throwing your dirty underwear in the floor."
If we love our mate we will avoid being offensive and avoid doing offensive things that harm the marriage relationship.
The same thing applies to the church. If we want to encourage one another in the faith, there may be times when we should stop doing certain things that are a stumbling block to others, things that offend.
ILL.- I heard about a young Christian man who had a lot of charisma and especially, when it came to influencing young people. He wanted to be a youth sponsor at his church. One day at ball game he was carrying his cup of beer up the steps, and he ran into a couple of junior high kids from the church. They stopped and talked and laughed, and he could tell that they looked up to him.
As he sat down in his seat with his beer in hand, he thought to himself, "It would be awful if tonight those young people decided to go drink beer because of me and get into trouble over it or have an accident."
AND THAT WAS THE LAST BEER THAT YOUNG MAN EVER DRANK. He stopped drinking beer out of love for those young people. Love avoids being offensive.
II. ATTEND TO OTHERS
II Cor. 6:6 Paul speaks of understanding, patience, and kindness. And when we are understanding, patient and kind, we are generally thoughtful of other people.
But, sad to say, we live in a very self-centered society.
ILL.- A Sunday School teacher, after reading the story of the Good Samaritan, asked her class what they learned. One little boy piped up and said, "I have learned that whenever I get into trouble someone should help me out."
Most of us look out for number one, meaning ourselves.
ILL.- Believe it or not, I think of this every time I get on the elevator at Sarah Bush Hospital.
When I go there I am always in a hurry. I get out of my car and literally run to the door. When I leave the hospital doors I run back to my car.
I’m always in a hurry. But when I’m on that elevator at the hospital, no matter how many people there are on that elevator, I have made it my practice to allow everyone to get off first.
I am always in a hurry, but I want those people (whoever they are) to know that this guy is thinking of them. I am not always so thoughtful, but that is one time I am.
But basically, we are selfish, self-centered, thinking of ourselves before we think of others. But it should not be this way.
Phil. 2:3-4 "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others."
ILL.- Bob Russell is the Sr. Minister of the large Southeast Christian Church of Louisville, KY. Last weekend they had over 22,053 in three services attend their church. Their general fund offering was $608,704. Another $27,000 was given to the building fund. They’ve also already had 369 people join the church since Jan. 1st. You would think that the Sr. Minister of such a large church should deserve some distinction and respect wherever he goes. Right? Of course. Like the kind of respect you people give me!!
Bob tells this story about his parents, who were raised differently from many people today. Bob said, "Recently, my sister asked us to a family get-together at her house in Cincinnati. They were in a new house, so she gave us directions.
She said there was room for only two cars in the driveway, we couldn’t park on the street. If the driveway was full when we arrived, we were to drive half a block down the street, park at the schoolyard, and walk back to the house.
When my family and I arrived, there were no cars in the driveway, so I pulled in. When we went inside, we discovered my parents were already there. They had parked down at the schoolyard and walked so that those who came later wouldn’t have to walk that far. So I went back out and moved my car down the schoolyard and walked back."
Bob was humbled by his humble parents. What a lesson for all of us today! That’s the kind of thoughtfulness we should have for others. Love attends to others! Love is always thinking of others!
III. SPEAK YOUR LOVE
ILL.- There’s an old joke or story which I don’t remember well (but Forest Saveley would remember it!) but I will try to recall it for you.
Early on in their marriage, the husband told his wife that he loved her. But years passed and he never again told her that he loved her. Finally, one day she asked him about this. He replied, "Look, I told you a long time ago that I loved you and that if I ever changed my mind I would tell you!"
I think this is exactly how many husbands may feel about expressing love to their wives. BUT THEIR WIVES DON’T FEEL THIS WAY!
II Cor. 6:11-12 "We have spoken freely to you..."
I think we can assume that in Paul’s free speech he was quick to express his love for people. He wasn’t too fearful nor proud to say, "You mean a lot to me. I care about you. I love you. I am here for you."
Eccl. 3:7 "there is a time to be silent and a time to speak."
Prov. 10:21 "The lips of the righteous nourish many." Are you nourishing people with your lips, with your speaking, with your words?
Prov. 12:18 "The tongue of the wise brings healing."
Are you bringing about healing with your words?
Prov. 13:12 "Hope deferred makes the heart sick..."
I believe that many people are heart-sick because they never hear those words from anyone: "I LOVE YOU!" They hope to hear those words of love, but never do. Or they seldom do and consequently, they are sick.
Not everyone is good at expressing their love in their speaking, but we all need to work at it. There is a time to be silent, but there is also a time to speak. WE SHOULD SPEAK OUR LOVE TO PEOPLE.
ILL.- Some years ago I found some talking key chains. Yeah, seriously, talking key chains. They had a little button on them to push and when you did, they would speak to you.
The men’s key chains would say things that he was supposed to say to his mate: "Yes, dear." "You’re so beautiful. "Of course, I love you." And "Just charge it, honey."
Now, men, if you need one of those key chains in order to say to your wife, "Of course, I love you," we’ll get it for you!
Not only should we express our love for our mates and our family members (which should be the easiest to do), we should also express our love to our other family members as well. By that, I mean the church family.
ILL.- I was taken back some years ago by a Nazarene preacher. And that really took me back, because I didn’t think that would ever happen.
I assisted in a wedding that took place in the Nazarene church in town. This young couple was going to attend our church but she had previously gone to the Nazarene church and wanted to be married there. In fact, she and her family invited the former preacher to come back and perform her wedding and I assisted him.
Before the wedding started, the Nazarene preacher and the father of the bride and I were in the backroom waiting. Suddenly, just before we walked out, the Nazarene preacher said to the father of the bride whom he had apparently known for many years, "I love you, Robert." And Robert, "I love you too."
THAT TOOK ME BACK. I had never heard a man in a church tell another man, "I love you" and mean it in the right way. BUT I’VE HEARD IT IN THIS CHURCH. Praise God, I’ve heard it here!
A genuine expression of love is expressing your love vocally.
ILL.- Knock. Knock. Who’s there? Olive. Olive who? Olive you!
And I do love you and I intend to say it. You need to hear it. We all do.
CONCLUSION-------------------------------------
ILL.- There is an old legend about a man lost in the desert. He was dying for a drink of water. He stumbled on a old shack. He looked around and found a little shade from the heat of the desert. As he looked around, he saw an old rusty, water pump about 15 feet away. He stumbled over to it, grabbed the handle, and began to pump and pump, but nothing came out.
He happened to notice that to the side of the pump was an old jug. He looked at it, wiped away the dirt, and read a message that was on it. It read: "You have to prime the pump with all the water in this jug. Be sure to fill the jug again before you leave."
He popped the cork out of the jug and found it almost full. Suddenly, he was faced with a decision. If he drank the water, he could live and be satisfied. But if he poured the water into the old rusty pump, maybe it would give cool water from down deep in the well, and he would have plenty of water.
He pondered the situation: should he waste all the water on the hope of getting more water? Or should he drink it?
Somewhat reluctantly, he poured all the water into the pump. Then the grabbed the handle and began to pump. Squeak, squeak, squeak. Still nothing came out! Squeak, squeak, squeak. And finally, a little bit of water dribbled out. Then a stream and finally, the water gushed out! He filled the jug and drank from it. He filled it another time and again drank from it.
Then he filled the jug for the next traveler. He filled it to the top, put the cork back in, and added this note: "Believe me, this really works! You have to give it all away before you can get anything back."
And so it is with love. Many people are unloved, feel unloved, and don’t get much love. Could it be that we have not given it away? The Lord has given it to you and now it is time for you to give it away to others.
