The Secret of the Ideal Mother
Proverbs 31:10-31
By Rev. Chad H. Ballard
Televisions modern day models of motherhood include Roseanne who is loud and spews obscenities and Peg Bundy who main interest is not her children or having dinner ready for Al.
Proverbs 19:13 says, “...the contentions of a wife are a continual dripping.”
Proverbs 25:24 says, “It is better to dwell of a housetop, than in a house shared with a contentious woman.”
When I think about role models for mothers, I think about June Cleaver from “Leave it to Beaver”. She was so sweet and loving. She didn’t even scream at Beaver when he did really creepy stuff.
She always had dinner ready when Ward got home. She ran the house well. You know she was in charge because Ward would have never voluntarily wore a coat and tie to dinner. And I never once heard her yell at Ward for spending all day on Saturday at the golf course!
What the world needs is more June Cleavers for mothers.
Well, the Bible gives us another model of the ideal mother and it is found in Proverbs 31:10-31. Let’s study her together.
I. The Marriage of the Ideal Mother (vv.10-13)
A. (v.10) A good woman is hard to find.
1. Her worth is because of her rarity
a. What makes a ruby so valuable?
b. Much of her worth is because of the effort it takes to find her.
2. Many translations use “jewels” or “precious stones” instead of “rubies”.
a. If you just want to find a rock, you can find those anywhere.
b. But, if you want to find a “jewel” those have to be sought after longer, and harder. They are not easy to come by.
B. (v. 11-12) Her husband is able to “safely trust” her.
1. He has no need to be jealous.
a. He knows that because she is “virtuous” that she will be faithful to him.
b. She doesn’t cause him to doubt her motives by her actions. (i.e. “girls night out”)
2. He has no need to doubt her motives with his wealth.
a. He knows that she will do him good and not evil. He knows that he will have no lack of gain because of her.
b. She won’t be a spendthrift, but rather she will be helpmate.
c. I have literally seen women destroy their husband’s heart and career by causing him to distrust her to the point that he couldn’t even go to work without wondering what she was up to.
II. The Behavior of the Ideal Mother (vv.13-24)
A. She is industrious.
1. V. 13 says that the “willingly works with her hands”
a. She is not a complainer about the tasks of caring for her family.
b. Sometimes we can “kill” the effects of a kind deed by complaining about having to do it.
2. It also says that she “brings food from afar”.
a. Mothers sometimes go to great lengths to get just the right kind of food to please her family.
b. That’s why she seeks wool and flax. She desires the best that she can afford for her family.
3. V. 16 says, “She considers a field and buys it; from her profits she plants a vineyard.”
a. There is nothing wrong with a mother helping to provide for her family.
b. But a mother has to remember that her first priority should be to her family.
c. She should work to help provide necessities; not to provide fancier cars and houses when what her children really need is more time with their mother.
B. She is a good provider.
1. She provides for her family. (v.21)
a. An ideal mother is rarely in bed when her children arise and rarely goes to bed when they do.
b. We men think that after we come in from a hard day at work, we can just crash on the couch.
c. The old adage goes, “A man’s work is from sun to sun, but a woman’s work is never done.”
d. A mother works just as many hours as her husband does and then cooks dinner and keeps working getting the kids things ready for the next day.
2. She provides for the poor. The ideal mother is charitable. (v. 20)
3. She provides for her husband. (v. 23)
a. A woman has a great impact on the reputation of her husband.
b. I Corinthians 11:7 tells us that man is the image and glory of God, “…but woman is the glory of man.”
4. She provides for herself. (v. 22)
III. The Character of the Ideal Mother (vv.25-26)
A. Strength and honor are her clothing.
1. This is a woman who must surely fear the Lord
a. When a woman chooses to clothe herself in strength and honor, she is displaying divine wisdom. The kind that can only come from walking with God.
b. Only with the peace that comes from walking with God, can a woman “rejoice in time to come”. She doesn’t fear the future, she rejoices in it.
B. She speaks with wisdom and kindness.
1. Today it is trendy to be sharp tongued and quick with a comeback.
2. But the ideal mother is loving and kind in her speech.
3. She also gives good advice to her family because her words are based on the “law of kindness”.
IV. The Family-life of the Ideal Mother (28-29)
A. Her children will call her blessed.
1. Kids, honor you mothers.
2. They love you and only want the best for you.
B. Her husband also; and he praises her.
1. Do you see what he says to her? “Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all.”
2. Men, praise your wives. This man is simply saying, “There are some good women out there, but you’ve got them all beat. You are the best.”
V. The Secret of the Ideal Mother (v. 30)
A. The pathway of her greatness lies through her recognition of spiritual values.
1. Young men, understand this. Your first criteria when searching for the ideal wife should be her spiritual values.
2. “Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
a. Men, look for a wife that is first and foremost a Christian. Not just a lukewarm Christian, but a true servant of God.
b. Then I hope you can find a good-looking one in the bargain, but first search out a woman with a heart for God.
Conclusion
Moms, are you living out the virtuous life of the Ideal Mother. If not you come during this invitation and commit yourself to live for Christ. Only then can you be a Virtuous Mother, worthy of honor.
Men, are you honoring God by honoring your wife. Would you commit yourself today to leading your family to walk in a way that would glorify God?
