September 23, 2001 John 11
“God’s three answers to prayer”
INTRODUCTION
1. God says “yes” to some requests.
We like that. We respond well to that. In the passage that we looked at last week, Acts 4, the disciples received exactly what they asked for. They asked for boldness to continue to speak for God in spite of the opposition, and that is exactly what they received.
2. God says “wait” to some requests.
a) …because He wants us to focus on Him.
One of the things that we must do is keep a proper perspective on prayer. What is its purpose? It is not the bat phone that you reach for in times of trouble. Prayer is our means of communication with God. It is one of the means that we use to get to know Him. It develops our relationship with Him.
Oftentimes though, we view prayer as our hotline to the Almighty, but the only thing that we bring to Him is our grocery list of needs. There’s nothing wrong with praying for your needs, but it’s not the primary purpose of prayer. Prayer is time to intentionally focus on God.
There’s the temptation to replace God with needs. When this happens, things become our focus. In a real sense, needs and concerns become the object of our worship. This is called idolatry, and the Bible warns against it. “Do not worship any gods besides me.” (Exodus 20:3, NLT)
What would it be like in your relationship with your spouse if the only conversation that went on between you was requests for one thing or another. “What’s for dinner?”; “Have you seen my new tie?”; “The grass needs mowing.” Those are servant questions. That’s the kind of questions that kids ask. They ask for things all day long. But adults take time to get to know one another. “How was your day today, dear?” “How did you feel about what happened?“ “What are your dreams for the future?” Those are relationship questions. Do you want God to be your servant or your Father?
A preacher named Peter Lord once said, “Seek God’s hand and not his face, and you’ll get neither. Seek His face and not his hand and you’ll get both.” Jesus said it this way: “But seek first his kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” (Matt. 6:33, NIV)
b) …because He wants us to trust in Him.
God has seen fit to give Tammy and me two control freaks for children. Every time that we get in the car to go somewhere, the first noise out of their mouths is, “Where are we going?” Then it’s “What are we going to do when we get there?” Followed by “How long are we going to be there?” Which leads to “Where are we going after that?” And the cycle repeats itself. Or at least it would if we didn’t nip it in the bud at that first question with a statement that goes something like this: “You guys do not need to know everything. Just sit back and enjoy the ride. Momma and Daddy are in control. Trust us.”
In the book of Proverbs, Solomon said, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways, acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths [or make your paths straight]” (Prov 3:5,6)
When I was growing up, I used to love to put models together. I’d do model cars, boats, airplanes – whatever I could find. With each model that I received, there came along a totally unnecessary thing called instructions. And in those instructions were multiple steps that were supposed to be done in a certain order. But being the wonderful mechanic that I was, I didn’t need instructions. I would just start to take the parts out of the box and put them together. Sometimes, I would get those snap-together models. EASY!! Snap, snap, and snap. All together. Oops, there’s an extra piece on the ground. It’s the clear plastic pieces that were supposed to be the headlights. But now I can’t put them in because my model is one of those kind that once you snap it together, you can’t take it apart. I guess I should have read the instructions and done things in their proper order.
God knows the order for our lives too. He’s got a plan for us. What I am asking for today may be a part of His plan for my life – eventually, but not right now. There are a few more steps in my life that I have to go through in order for that thing that I desire to fit just right. I must be willing to trust the one who created me to do things in just the right order even if it means that I must wait.
c) …because He wants to change our attitude.
If the number one purpose of prayer is relationship building between us and God, probably the 2nd greatest purpose is to shape our character. Sometimes, we ask for things that God wants to give us…eventually. But we may not be at a place where we’re spiritually mature enough to handle it. One day I’ll let my kids use the lawn mower and the weed eater, but today is not that day. They are too young. They’d hurt themselves with that kind of equipment. When they’re old enough, I’ll be glad to let them use it. In fact, I’ll insist that they use it.
In Phil. 2, Paul said, “Let this mind [or this attitude, or way of thinking] be in you which was also in Christ Jesus.” Jesus’ attitude was one in which He made Himself a servant to mankind. Even though He was God, He lowered Himself to our humaness in order that we might be saved. Some of us have too high an opinion of ourselves. We think that the world revolves around us, and sometimes, we are tempted to think that the heavens should revolve around us too.
I was speaking with one mother this week, and we got to talking about all the things that have been going on in our world and how that has affected the children. Her daughter is 8 years old and was getting ready to have a birthday. She noticed all the flags going up all over the community. Her explanation for all the flags was that everyone was decorating for her birthday. The whole world was revolving around her. That’s humorous to see things through a child’s innocence, but it is also sad to think how many people believe just like she did. Everything revolves around them.
The Bible records the story of a man named Job. In one day, he lost his 10 children, and his entire fortune. The next day, he lost his health and the support of his wife. He cried out to God with his complaint. But God did not answer him. Not until late in the book and many, many hours of suffering does God come down to Job. But instead of trying to comfort Job, God rebukes him. He says, “Where were you when I created the world? What gives you the right to order me around and tell me how and when I am going to act? Get back in your place Job!” Job responded, and God eventually granted the desires of his heart. But it didn’t happen until Job got his attitude right. When He remembered who God was and realized that he was not God, then God could work in his life again.
d) …because He wants to give us a greater gift.
Some of you can remember back to when you were in high school or maybe even all the way back to junior high. Did you ever pray and ask God to cause a particular someone to fall in love with you and marry you. Was there a special guy or girl way back then who made your little heart go pitter-patter? You practically begged God to let you marry them. Looking back now, aren’t you glad that you didn’t? He had someone far more suitable for you in mind.
In the book of John in the New Testament, there’s a story about a guy named Lazarus who became critically ill. Lazarus and his two sisters, Martha and Mary, were tight friends with Jesus. They loved each other. During his illness Lazarus’ sisters sent for Jesus. They knew he had the power ot heal their brother. Jesus received word about it, but instead of going immediately to meet their need, he watied two day. Lazarus died. Jesus finally showed up four days after the man had been placed in a tomb. The sisters came out to meet ajesus with the accusation, “Lord, if only you’d come sooner, Lazarus would still be alive.” Not only were they grieving, they were disappointed in Jesus. As it turns out Jesus had a greater gift in mind. He went to the tomb, had the men roll the stone away and called a resurrected Lazarus to come forth from the grave.
Can you imagine the joy that replaced sorrow on that day? Can you envision the faith it must have bolstered in the two sisters and everyone who saw what happened? It says in the passage that tells this story that because of these events, many people put their faith in Jesus. Healing Lazarus of his disease would have been good; raising Lazarus from the dead was far better.
That’s the way God works. Often times we ask and don’t receive. It grieves us. We wonder what’s up with God. If we persist in our relationship with Him and keep seeking Him, many times we’ll find he has a greater gift than what we’ve been asking for.
3. God says “no” to some requests.
a) …because it simply does not fit into God’s plan for our lives.
I remember when I was just a little boy hearing a story about a girl who had brown eyes. She didn’t like her brown eyes. She wanted blue eyes. She thought that having blue eyes would make her more attractive. So every night, she would close her eyes tight and pray that God would change the color of her eyes. After she prayed, she would open her eyes and look in the mirror only to find that she still had brown eyes. She prayed this prayer over and over, but God never did change the color of her eyes. The little girl grew up. Even though God never granted her request, she was still obedient to Him when He called her to be a missionary. She arrived on the mission field and began to work with these people. They accepted her immediately, and she saw great fruit to her work. One day, it just happened to dawn on her that everyone that she was working with had brown eyes just like she did. And she realized that if God had granted her request and given her blue eyes, she would have never been accepted by these people. And she thanked God for saying “no” to her. Her request did not fit into God’s plan for her life.
In Paul’s life, he made a desperate request of God. He had some kind of problem – he calls it his “thorn in the flesh”. He asked God to take it away. God said “no”. It simply was not a part of God’s plan for his life. Incidently, we’re going to be talking more about this refused prayer of Paul’s next week so that we can see what the proper response to God is when He does say “no” to us.
God knows the future. We do not. God has a good plan for our lives. “…plans to prosper you and not to harm you…” When God says “no”, we must trust that He knows what He is doing.
b) …because our relationships with other people aren’t right.
Our relationship with other people affects our connection with God. The horizontal and the vertical are inseparable. Look how seriously God takes our relationships.
“…if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.” (Matt 6:15, NLT) “If you bring your gift to the altar and remember that your brother has a problem with you, leave your gift there. Go and make things right with your brother….”
Guys, take special note of this one. “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect…so that nothing will hinder your prayers.” (1 Pet. 3:7)
If you’re not right with people, then you are not right with God.
c) …because our prayers are selfish.
Our motives have to be right when we pray. There’s a reason why we won’t miraculously get that bass boat we’ve prayed for. There’s a reason why God doesn’t send us that luxury sports car with a ribbon tied around it. The selfish requests of self-absorbed people self-destruct in the presence of a selfless God.
“You want something but don’t get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.” (James 4:2,3)
Here’s the thing. God expects that his generosity toward us will result in our generosity toward other people. If you’re all about getting and not giving, don’t expect to get answers to prayer.
d) …because we’ve disregarded God’s commands or have unconfessed sin.
“If anyone turns a deaf ear to the law, even his prayers are detestable.” (Prov 28:9)
The law signifies God’s commands. He has established certain principles that we are to follow. If we choose to deliberately go our own way, God will let us. But don’t expect him to pay the tab. Don’t expect Him to come pick up the pieces when we’ve messed up our whole lives if there is no repentance in our hearts and no willingness to do things God’s way.
God has told us to do certain things and to live a certain way. We refuse. And then we have the gall to curse God when He refuses to give us what we ask for in prayer.
When Norman Vincent Peal was a boy, he found a big, black cigar, slipped into an alley, and lit up. It didn’t taste good, but it made him feel very grown up…until he saw his father coming. Quickly, he put the cigar behind his back and tried to look casual. Desperate to divert his father’s attention, Norman pointed to a billboard advertising the circus. “Can I go, Daddy? Please, let’s go when it comes to town.” His father’s response taught Norman a lesson he never forgot. “Son”, he answered quietly but firmly, “never make a petition while at the same time trying to hide smoldering disobedience.”
“If I had cherished sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened…” (Ps. 66:18)
God wants our healing. He won’t let us go blindly on. Unfulfilled prayer requests are often God’s means to get us to seek Him seriously and find out if perhaps we have gotten off track.
It is part of His means of disciplining us just as any real father will discipline their children to get them to follow the best possible path for their lives.
e) …because all of our hope is in this world.
You can take comfort in the fact that men and women of great faith throughout history have experience unanswered prayer and unrealized promises. The 11th chapter of Hebrews is known as the faith heroes’ hall of fame. The author lists the people God used in a mighty way to change this world. All of them were people of prayer. None of them gave up on God when they didn’t see an answer. One verse says of them: “These all died in faith, not having received the promises…” (Heb. 11:13) To Abraham, God made the promise that he would become a great nation. That promise was fulfilled but not in Abraham’s lifetime. He promised that Abraham would inherit the land of Canaan. It was fulfilled but not until Abraham had long been dead. He promised that Abraham would have as one of his descendants the one who would rescue men from their sins. It happened in Jesus, but Abraham still had to accept it by faith.
Not seeing these promises fulfilled had a dramatic impact on Abraham and these other people of faith. The impact was that they realized that this world was not their home. “…Thy did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance. And they admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth…they were longing for a better country – a heavenly one” (vs. 13,16)
I am convinced that God does not like it when we get too comfortable here on earth. If we get too comfortable, then we will no longer have to live by faith. Faith is all about believing what God has said and doing what He commands even when things don’t turn out quite the way that we wanted.
God wants us always to remember that our home is still waiting for us. He wants us to be storing up treasures there, not here. He wants us to be preparing ourselves and others to live there instead of always spending time trying to make life better for ourselves here. God so desires us to want to come home that he says that there is a crown especially for those who are looking for the appearing of Jesus Christ.
They didn’t receive the fulfillment of their desires in order that they might remain a little uneasy, a little on edge, a little homesick.
f) …because we have no relationship with Him.
There’s one more reason for God’s refusal of our requests that we need to discuss this morning. Jesus said that there is day of judgment coming. On that day, there will be people who come to Jesus begging him to let them into heaven. They’ll say things like, “Lord, lord, didn’t we do all these wonderful works in your name? We fed the poor, we clothed the naked, we gave to the relief fund for those who have gone through tragedies. We even rolled up our sleeves and gave blood so that other people could live. Our only prayer is that you let us into heaven!” And Jesus is going to sadly turn to them and say, “Depart from me. I never knew you.” Jesus is going to say “no” to their last and most desperate prayer of all.
God has only obligated himself to hear and answer the prayers of His children.
CONCLUSION
On September 27, 1991, as was his custom, Gerald Sittser, a professor of religion and philosophy at Whitworth College, prayed, asking God to protect and bless his family. Something went terribly wrong. Later that afternoon, returning from a family outing, a drunk driver lost control of his car and smashed into the Sittsers’ minivan. Sittser’s wife Lynda, his daughter Diana Jane, and his mother, who was visiting for the weekend, were all killed in the collision.
Ten years later, Sittser wrote: “To this day I have been unable to understand what made that day different. What prevented my prayers from getting through to God? Did I commit some unpardonable sin? Did I fail to say the right words? Did God suddenly turn against me? Why, I have asked myself a thousand times, did my prayer go unanswered?”
He concludes an article on unanswered prayer with these words: “…Jesus charges us to view life from a redemptive perspective. There is more to life than meets the eye when God gets involved. He works things out for our good….We view unanswered prayer from the perspective of our immediate experience and our limited vision. But God is doing something so great that only faith can grasp it, wait for it, and pray for it.” [Gerald L. Sittser, Discipleship Journal, Jan/Feb 2001, p. 26.
There will be times in this life when we will be able to look back and trace God’s hand and at least partially see why He gave us the answer that He did when we prayed to Him – either “yes”, “wait”, or “no”. But there will be other times that we will never know the reason – not even when we get to heaven. How are you going to respond to that? Are you going to give up on prayer? Are you going to get mad at God? Or are you in faith going to examine yourself to see if there is something in your life that is hindering your prayers, allow God to change you and leave the results up to Him? He is God after all. He is under no obligation to explain Himself to us.
INVITATION
Two prayers that God will always say “yes” to so long as they are on this side of death - the prayer for forgiveness and the prayer for salvation.
