What Parents Owe Their Children
A Quest for Character
November 4, 2001
This series isn’t about parenting. I do hope this helps those of us who are raising children…
But it’s really about living out our key principles of our faith in front of the children in our lives!
We want to talk about character…
- character in public life
- character in the schools
- character in the office place
- character in marriage
Famous quotes regarding character:
- Ralph Waldo Emerson – “Character is that which can do without success.”
- Dwight L. Moody – “Character is what a person is in the dark.”
- Charles Spurgeon – “A good character is the best tombstone.”
- Character is who you are when everyone and when no one is looking.
But we’re talking about more than morality or good, clean living here…
Anyone can be moral… I want to talk about the special wisdom of Christianity. What does the Christian sense of character mean?
“Teach your children to choose the right path, and when they are older, they will remain upon it.” Proverbs 22:6, NLT
The Christian wisdom is there is a right path – not a good path, a nice path, certainly not an easier path – a right path.
The right path is more than just good character,
The right path is God’s character
This pathway of God’s character is a Quest – A Holy Quest – one that you will pursue your entire life. One you will never finish, but one that God says you will not fail.
- This quest will take a very real desire
- Will involve very real difficulty
- Will demand you practice a self-denial
- But it is a quest of Destiny
o Yes destination…
o But also destiny
“I set before you Heaven and Hell, life and death…” Moses – Deut 30
Listen to these words of someone on the quest from Psalm 119:
”Teach me, O LORD, to follow every one of your principles. Give me understanding and I will obey your law; I will put it into practice with all my heart. Make me walk along the path of your commands, for that is where my happiness is found. Give me an eagerness for your decrees; do not inflict me with love for money! Turn my eyes from worthless things, and give me life through your word. Reassure me of your promise, which is for those who honor you.”
Psalm 119: 33-38, NLT
Future generations need us to mark the pathway of our own quest God’s character.
Markers are intentional
Markers are visible
Markers show progress
Marker 1: A Chosen Pathway
From Psalm 119…
I will obey your law; I will put it into practice with all my heart. Make me walk along the path of your commands, for that is where my happiness is found. Give me an eagerness for your decrees…
This is a decision I’ve made… a once for all decision… and a decision I have to remake frequently…
“The LORD says, ‘I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you.’” Psalm 32:8, NLT
- Consider the words of this classic poem by Robert Frost
The Road Not Taken
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I –
I took the tone less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
Robert Frost
Marker 2: A Continual Practice
Children need to see us living out and practicing the faith we profess.
From Psalm 119: “Give me understanding and I will obey your law; I will put it into practice with all my heart.”
“Don’t be impatient for the LORD to act! Travel steadily along his path.” Psalm 37:34, NLT
- Three Preachers are having a discussion debating which Bible translation they each prefer. The first suggests that the New International Version is the one most capable of growing people closer to the Lord. The second insists that the New American Standard is so much more textually accurate. The third interrupts and says, “I prefer my mother’s translation.” The other two preachers are stunned, “I didn’t know you mother translated the Biblical texts…” “Oh, she did,” the third replied. “My mother translated the Bible every day right in front of my eyes – with her life!”
Marker 3: A Confirmed Priority
From our Psalm 119 text: “Give me an eagerness for your decrees; do not inflict me with love for money!”
“Your word is a lamp for my feet and a light for my path.” Psalm 119:105, NLT
- I heard recently of a business owner who, as a seeker, had employed scores of Christians in his company. He watched them like a hawk. "You know, I was naturally drawn to God by observing Christian workers who were conscientious and kind and thorough and aggressive on the job," he said. "But I’ll tell you what really impressed me. One day a guy who I knew to be a fresh convert asked if he could see me after work. I agreed to meet with him, but later in the day I started to worry that this young religious zealot might be coming to try to convert me, too."
"I was surprised when he came in my office with his head hanging low and said to me, ’Sir, I’ll only take a few minutes, but I’m here to ask your forgiveness. Over the years I’ve worked for you I’ve done what a lot of other employees do, like borrowing a few company products here and there. And I’ve taken some extra supplies; I’ve abused telephone privileges; and I’ve cheated the time clock now and then.
"’But I became a Christian a few months ago and it’s real - not the smoke and mirror stuff. In gratitude for what Christ has done for me and in obedience to Him, I want to make amends to you and the company for the wrongs I’ve done. So could we figure out a way to do that? If you have to fire me for what I’ve done, I’ll understand. I deserve it. Or, if you want to dock my pay, dock it whatever figure you think is appropriate. If you want to give me some extra work to do on my own time, that would be okay, too, I just want to make things right with God and between us.’"
Well they worked things out. And the business owner said that this conversation made a deeper spiritual impact on him than anything else ever had. It was the single most impressive demonstration of true Christianity he had ever witnessed.
You can say this is important all you want… but can the children in your life see it by how you live? Where do you put your passion? Where do you put your money? Where do you put your time?
No father ever tells his son that the job is more important with his mouth, he does with his time. No mother ever tells her children that maintaining appearances is more important than being truthful, she does it with her passion…
Marker 4: A Cultivated Partnership
“O LORD, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my every thought when far away. You chart the path ahead of me and tell me where to stop and rest. Every moment you know where I am. You know what I am going to say even before I say it, LORD. You both precede and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head.” Psalm 139: 1-5, NLT (italics added)
The further along the pathway we go, the more we start to see the other set of footprints that have all along been alongside our own.
I Want to Be Just Like You
(© Phillips, Craig and Dean – words copied from inside cover “Favorite Songs of All”)
He climbs in my lap for a goodnight hug, He calls me Dad and I call him Bub. With his faded old pillow and a bear named Pooh, He snuggles up close and says, “I want to be like you.” “I tuck him in bed and I kiss him goodnight, trippin’ over the toys as I turn out the light. And I whisper a prayer that someday he’ll see, He’s got a father in God, ‘cause he’s seen Jesus in me.
[chorus}
Lord I want to be just like You, ‘cause He wants to be just like me. I want to be a holy example for his innocent eyes to see. Help me be a living Bible, Lord that my little boy can read. I want to be just like you, ‘cause he wants to be just like me.
Got to admit I’ve got so far to go, make so many mistakes and I’m sure that you know. Sometimes it seems no matter how hard I try, with all the pressures in life I just can’t get it all right. But I’m trying so hard to learn from the best. Being patient and kind, filled with Your tenderness, ‘Cause I know that he’ll learn from the things he sees. And the Jesus he finds will be the Jesus in me.
[chorus]
Right now from where he stands I may seem mighty tall. But its only ‘cause I’m learning from the very best Father of them all.
[chorus]
“Teach your children to choose the right path, and when they are older, they will remain upon it.” Proverbs 22:6, NLT
If future generations are going to walk the pathway of Christianity, we must mark for them our journey with the Divine. We must make the pathway we’ve traveled clear and present to them. Our quest for the character of God which they must see and experience first hand.
We teach what we know. We reproduce who we are.
