The Supremacy of Christ is Demonstrated in Our
Personal Relationships
Colossians 3:18-4:1
November 11, 2001
Intro:
A. [Wife Taken for Granted Too Long, Citation: Robert Leslie Holmes, God’s Man (Kregel, 1998)]
A man accompanied his friend home for dinner and was impressed by the way he entered his house, asked his wife how her day went, and told her she looked pretty.
Then, after they embraced, she served dinner.
After they ate, the husband complimented his wife on the meal and thanked her for it. When the two fellows were alone, the visitor asked, "Why do you treat your wife so well?"
"Because she deserves it, and it makes our marriage happier," replied the host.
Impressed, the visitor decided to adopt the idea.
Arriving home, he embraced his wife and said, "You look wonderful!"
For good measure he added, "Sweetheart, I’m the luckiest guy in the world."
His wife burst into tears.
Bewildered, he asked her, "What in the world’s the matter?"
She wept, "What a day! Billy fought at school. The refrigerator quit and spoiled the groceries. And now you’ve come home drunk!"
B. How are your relationships today?
1. With your spouse? With your children? With your boss or employees?
2. Have they been neglected and mistreated for so long that you would be thought drunk if you tried this?
3. In the last few verses of Colossians 3, Paul gives us some valuable principles on how to maintain godly relationships with those around us.
4. When our relationships display these principles we will be demonstrating for all the world to see the supremacy of Christ; first…
I. Wives, submit to your husbands
Colossians 3:18, Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
Ephesians 5:22-24, Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
A. Now here is a Biblical command that is not popular or politically correct.
1. This is not something that is touted in the women’s magazines, nor in the college classrooms.
2. But it is the Word of God.
B. Now let me briefly tell you what submitting is not.
1. Submitting doesn’t mean you’re a slave.
2. Submitting doesn’t mean you’re a go-for.
3. Submitting doesn’t mean being physically or emotionally abused.
4. And submitting to your husband doesn’t mean that you submit to all men.
C. So what is submitting?
1. Submitting is placing yourself in subjection to.
2. Submitting is willingly following your husband’s lead.
3. Submitting is what Christ did when He submitted himself to death for you.
4. Submitting is necessary for peace in the home.
5. Payton Manning may not be the strongest, fastest, or smartest member of the Colts, but he is the designated leader.
a. There has to be a leader on the team and the quarterback is that leader.
b. There has to be a leader on the team and Payton is the leader to whom the others submit, even though he’s not the fastest, strongest, and smartest one on the team.
6. Wives, submitting to your husbands is not degrading or humiliating, it is simply necessary that someone has to lead when there is not agreement and God has chosen the husband to be the leader.
7. Husbands and wives should communicate in loving ways to seek the best for the family, but when agreement cannot be reached, God has chosen the husbands to lead.
D. Submission, however is not absolute.
1. There are exceptions to wives submitting to husbands.
2. Wives, your first responsibility is not to your husband, but to the Lord!
3. Your first allegiance is to Christ and your husband second.
4. If your husband were to ask you to do something immoral, unethical, degrading, or dangerous, you are to "obey God rather than men."
5. Submission to husbands is not absolute; only submission to Christ is absolute.
6. Wives, respect your husband enough to submit to them.
II. Husbands, love your wives
Colossians 3:19, Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.
Ephesians 5:25-33, Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church-- 30 for we are members of his body. 31 "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." 32 This is a profound mystery--but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
A. Now I know that most of you men have been elbowing your wives and wanting to shout, "Amen, Preacher!"
1. How many of you men want to be treated like the king of your house?
2. If you do, then listen very carefully…
B. Men, we are called to something far more difficult than our wives.
1. We are called to "love our wives, just as Christ loved the church."
2. Now I want us all to notice that our wives are called to submit, we are called to love.
3. We are called to love our wives, and not to make them submit.
4. Our wives are called to submit; we are called to love just as Christ loved the church.
C. How did Christ love the church?
1. Christ gave himself up for the church.
2. Christ gave himself up to make the church holy.
3. Christ gave himself up to cleanse the church with the Scripture.
4. Christ gave himself up to present the church without stain or wrinkle or blemishes, but holy and blameless on Judgement Day.
D. Men, we ought to love our wives in the same way.
1. Husbands, we need to give ourselves up for our wives.
2. Husbands, we need to dedicate ourselves to the task of making our wives holy.
3. Husbands, we need to commit our lives to presenting our wives to Christ on Judgment Day without stain or wrinkle or blemishes, but holy and blameless.
4. Sounds a lot like submission to me!
5. Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church.
6. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.
7. Husbands, we have a much harder responsibility than the women do.
E. Men, if you want to be treated like the king of your house, then you treat your wife like your queen and not your slave.
1. And men if we do what God has called us to do, there will be very few wives that will have trouble submitting to us.
2. Husbands, love your wives.
III. Children, obey your parents
Colossians 3:20, Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.
Ephesians 6:1-3, Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 "Honor your father and mother"--which is the first commandment with a promise-- 3 "that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth."
A. Children, the Bible says that you are to obey your parents.
1. Why should you obey your parents?
2. The Bible says that obeying your parents pleases the Lord.
3. When you obey your parents, you make God happy.
4. You want to make God happy, don’t you?
B. Children are to obey your parents in everything—except when they are asking you to do something against God’s will.
1. Again, your first responsibility is to Christ.
2. If your parents are asking you to do something that is wrong or dangerous, you are to obey God instead of your parents.
C. The Ephesians chapter refers to the fifth of the 10 commandments, "Honor your father and mother."
1. And God was talking about all children here, whether young or old.
2. As long as our parents are alive, we are called to honor them.
3. Children are to place themselves in subjection to their parents.
4. They are to hold their parents in a place of high esteem in their words and actions.
5. And Paul points out that this fifth commandment contains a promise if we follow it.
6. Paul says that if we honor and obey our parents, things will go well for us and we will have a long life.
7. Now that does not mean that we will have no problems and we’ll all live to be 100?
8. But when we stop to look at others and the troubles it causes them when they don’t have good relationships with their parents, we can easily see what Paul means.
9. Paul means that things will go a lot better for us in this life if we learn to obey and honor our parents throughout our lives.
10. We will be much happier and have less stress when we learn to honor and obey our parents.
11. Bad relationships with parents lead to unnecessary pain and stress in life.
12. We are called to obey our parents when we are young and honor them when we are old.
13. Children, honor and obey your parents.
IV. Fathers, train your children
Colossians 3:21, Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.
Ephesians 6:4, Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
A. Now just when the men were about to start shoutin’ "Preach it, preacher!" again, God goes and turns it back on us again.
1. God tells the men that they have a major responsibility in this parent/child relationship as well.
2. Sadly, there are too many men who don’t realize that they are called to be the head of the household.
3. Sadly, there are too many men who don’t know that they are to be the head of the wife and they don’t know that they are to be the teachers to the children.
4. Fathers, you are called to get your wife to heaven and you’re are called to teach your children about God.
5. It is not the church’s job to train your children; its not even your wife’s job to teach your children; men it is your responsibility to teach your children about God.
6. You are Biblically responsible for the spiritual training of your children.
B. Paul says in both places that we are not to embitter or exasperate our children.
1. What does that mean?
2. Well there’s a clue in the positive side of Ephesians 4:6.
3. Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
4. I believe those are opposites. Training and instructing is to bring them to Christ.
5. Exasperating and embittering is to drive them away from Christ.
6. Fathers, we can’t make our children accept Christ, but we can give them the tools to make their own decision.
7. We can also drive them away from Christ by the way we treat them or the way we treat Christ.
8. What do our children learn from us about Christ?
9. Do they see us making worship a priority or do they see that worship is only when there isn’t something else to do or is it just for women and children?
10. Do they see us displaying the humble spirit of Christ in our homes or do they see us displaying some other spirit in our homes?
11. Do they see us living and talking about Christ in our daily lives or do they see that Christ is isolated to Sunday morning only?
12. Are we teaching our children the Word of God or are we expecting the church or the mothers to do it for us?
13. Are we producing the fruit of the spirit for our children to inspect or are they seeing some other fruit?
14. Fathers, bring your children up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
V. Employees, work sincerely for your employers
Colossians 3:22-25, Slaves, obey your earthly masters in everything; and do it, not only when their eye is on you and to win their favor, but with sincerity of heart and reverence for the Lord. 23 Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, 24 since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. 25 Anyone who does wrong will be repaid for his wrong, and there is no favoritism.
Ephesians 6:5-8, Slaves, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ. 6 Obey them not only to win their favor when their eye is on you, but like slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from your heart. 7 Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not men, 8 because you know that the Lord will reward everyone for whatever good he does, whether he is slave or free.
A. Did you know that God has called you to work as if your boss is Christ?
1. Some of you may be thinking, "Preacher, you don’t know my boss—he’s far from Christ!"
2. No, I may not know your boss, but I know that if you don’t do your job right, the most that will happen is that you will be fired.
3. Paul was actually talking to slaves and we can joke all we want to about being treated like slaves by our bosses, but the truth is that we all have it far better than slaves.
4. Even when your boss is angry and nasty to you verbally, you’re still going to get paid for it.
5. If you disobey your boss, you will not be beaten or killed.
6. Paul told slaves to obey their masters in everything.
7. So surely if God intended slaves to obey, he intends employees to obey.
B. We are to work sincerely for our employers.
1. We are to do what they want us to do even when they’re not looking.
2. We are to sincerely work hard out of reverence for God.
3. Whatever our job is—no matter how useless or demeaning we may think it—whatever our job, we are to work at it with all our heart.
4. We are to work as if Christ were our boss and not a man.
5. How would you do your job if Christ were your boss?
6. However you would do your job if Christ were your boss is how you should do your job.
7. Both passages say that there will be rewards for doing what is right on the job.
8. We are to do our jobs with excellence.
9. We are to do everything to the glory of God and not to ourselves.
10. The old saying may not be a quote from the Bible, but it certainly is Biblical: "Put in an honest day’s work for an honest day’s wages."
11. Employees, work sincerely for your employers.
VI. Employers, provide what is right and fair for your employees
Colossians 4:1, Masters, provide your slaves with what is right and fair, because you know that you also have a Master in heaven.
Ephesians 6:9, And masters, treat your slaves in the same way. Do not threaten them, since you know that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no favoritism with him.
A. Again this a reciprocal relationship just like all the rest.
1. Wives/husbands; children/parents; employees/employers.
2. God has given us instructions on how to relate now matter which side of the relationship we find ourselves on.
B. Employers are to do what is right for your employees.
1. Employers should pay their employees an honest wage for an honest day’s work.
2. Employers should provide as safe a work environment as they can.
3. Employers should not show favoritism to certain employees.
4. Employers should not be abusive to the employees.
5. Employers should remember that they have a boss too!
Conclusion:
A. Friends when these relationships principles are lived out in our lives—we will be a living testimony of the supremacy of Christ.
1. People will see that Christ is supreme because of the relationship that you wives have with your husbands.
2. People we see that Christ is supreme because of the relationship that us men have with our wives.
3. People will see that Christ is supreme because of the relationship that children have with their parents.
4. People will see that Christ is supreme because of the relationship that fathers have with their children.
5. People will see that Christ is supreme because of the relationship that employees have with their employers.
6. People will see that Christ is supreme because of the relationship that employers have with their employees.
B. Yes, our society has all kinds of ideas about these relationships as well..
1. But these time-tested principles found in the Bible are the only ones that work.
2. The bottom line is that these so-called new aged ways of living out these relationships don’t work. God’s ways are the only ways that work.
3. God’s ways are the only ways that will bring you joy and happiness.
4. If you are experiencing depression or stress, it may be because you are having problems in one or more of these relationships.
5. Is the supremacy of Christ demonstrated in your personal relationships?
C. [Ministry Begins at Home, Citation: Oswald Chambers in The Love of God. Christianity Today, Vol. 32, no. 10.]
Our Lord did not say to His disciples: "I have had a most successful time on earth. I have addressed thousands of people and been the means of their salvation; now you go and do the same kind of thing."
He said: "If I then, your Lord and Master, have washed your feet, ye also ought to wash one another’s feet."
We try to get out of it by washing the feet of those who are not of our own set.
We will wash the heathen’s feet, the feet in the slums; but fancy washing my brother’s feet!
My wife’s!
My husband’s!
The feet of the minister of my church!
Our Lord said "one another’s feet."
D. Are you washing the feet of those around you?
1. Are there relationships that you are having problems with and you need to come and pray about them today?
2. Wives is your relationship right with your husband today?
3. Husbands is your relationship right with wives today?
4. Husbands, do you need to take your wife by the hand and come together and pray about your relationship?
5. Fathers, is your relationship with your children right today?
6. Fathers, do you need to take a child by the hand and come and pray about that relationship?
7. If there are relationships that aren’t right, I want to encourage you to get them right today!
8. If your relationship with Christ is not right—then by all means come and get it right!
9. Whatever commitment you need to make, I want to encourage you to make it as we stand and sing.
