MISSIONARY BURNOUT: CAUSES & CURES
BY GREG WADDELL
II CORINTHIANS 2:14-17
"WHO IS EQUAL TO SUCH A TASK?"
I. INTRODUCTION
A. Background
My wife and I have been missionaries for 18 years. In 1982, with $150 of monthly support coming in, we hit the road with our one-year-old daughter to raise funds so we could be missionaries to Uruguay.
We had the privilege of being a part of the first team of missionaries from the Churches of Christ & Christian Churches to serve in that country. In 1991, we crossed the river to begin a new work in Buenos Aires, Argentina.
We started out in a tent. Today, there is a congregation with an average attendance of 80. We have also started a Bible institute, a leadership training center, a youth activity center and a soup kitchen ministry. After 11 years in Argentina, we feel as though we have only begun to understand the subtle nuances of their culture and to find that combination of processes, methods and principles that is effective for this particular place and time.
B. Introduce the Subject
When I was a boy, I had the experience of going on a trip to the Cumberland Caverns. I can remember crawling on all fours, straddling deep canyons and sliding down slippery rock formations. I have always wanted to go back and revisit the caves. So, my daughter Leah and I planned this furlough to do the Wild Cave Tour at Mammoth Cave national park in Kentucky. This is a tour that takes you to many places where normal tours do not.
In one section of this tour, we entered a fairly wide hallway with a ceiling about four feet from the floor. We could walk, but we had to stoop. Gradually the ceiling came closer to the floor. Soon I was crawling on all fours. Then I was flat on my stomach, pulling myself forward by my elbows. Soon after that, the passage was so narrow, I could not put my boots in a horizontal position, and then I could not put my helmet in a horizontal position. A little beyond that I found myself securely wedged into the 9-inch space that remained between the ceiling and the floor.
I began to feel a sensation of panic. I felt as though I might be truly stuck with no possibility of going forward or backward. Someone said to push off the hands of the person behind me. I tried that and gained six inches, six inches further into a vice grip of solid rock. I could not move and, to make things worse, I couldn’t even see in front of me.
This experience illustrates how many missionaries feel. They feel trapped as though in a vice, from which they can neither retreat nor move forward. I have felt that way and I want to talk to you about that this evening.
II. JOURNEY TOWARD THE PRECIPICE OF BURNOUT
A. Motivation
I have often run across people who view missionaries as a special breed. Perhaps it is true that God gives us an extra dose of the adventurous temperament, but, other than that, I don’t see missionaries as being any different than other Christians. We have the same weaknesses, motivations and drives.
We go to the mission field with a view to conquer ... to plant indigenous, self-supporting, self-governing and self-propagating churches. We arrive knowing what we want and what the people need.
We come with plans, strategies, objectives and goals. In some of our early publicity, we even used the phrase: "Target Argentina." Argentina was my TARGET, my point of conquest. Without even knowing it, I had joined the long string of "conquistadores" that had arrived down through the centuries to the Latin American continent. I was going to be a blessing to the people. I was going to give them what they needed.
In reality, I was out to achieve MY objectives: to dominate, to master--not so much to master the people, but to master this project that I had set out to accomplish.
B. People Are Uncooperative
There was one major problem with this approach: God has created mankind to be free moral agents. There is this thing called "free will" that causes people to do what they want and not what I want. I had my plans and objectives, but people just didn’t cooperate.
It seemed that, no matter how hard we tried, no matter how innovative our methods, no matter how detailed our strategies, NOTHING WORKED.
It was like plodding through a dense muddy forest, always seeing just enough light ahead to keep my hope from totally dying out, yet never seeming to draw any nearer to that open place, never reaching the goal.
That deep suffocating sense of frustration led me to a state of anger. The people were not cooperating with my plans. It was all their fault. And, believe me, I could enumerate a multitude of their flaws, inconsistencies and failings.
[By the way, a clear danger sign of one who is nearing the precipice of burnout is to focus solely on the negative aspects of the field culture and to speak always in terms of "they."]
This anger ate away at my inner life. I could, for the most part, keep it hidden under a facade of hard-nosed perseverance. Perseverance is good, but perseverance that does not allow us to stop and take stock of what is happening in our lives is deadly perseverance.
Occasionally the anger would explode in the most unexpected and devastating ways. I found myself hurting people and then regretting it. A boiling volcano was churning in my soul. This churning was my self trying desperately to survive. . . . To stay alive . . . fighting against the inevitable death that it so desperately needed.
Even my efforts at benevolence bred contempt rather than gratitude. I became the source of money and opportunity for many, but not in a relationship of mutual respect and freedom.
I felt as though I were falling. I was angry and disappointed. Worst of all, I was distancing myself from God. "Could I trust God?" "Is this gospel really sufficient for all people?
I felt empty, like a treasure box that has been ransacked, like a wrinkly old orange from which all the juice has been squeezed.
Where can a missionary go to get more juice?
I felt that I had an image to maintain, supporters who had invested their hard-earned funds into me and this work. I dare not show weakness.
In "Overcoming the Dark Side of Leadership," Gary McIntosh, postulates his theory that most, if not all, leaders have a dark side to their personality, some internal drive that has pushed them into seeking out leadership and that, if left on its own, could eventually lead to their own self destruction.
My dark side was always trying to please others. There was a part of me that became a missionary to serve my own inner need for significance and recognition. I therefore greatly feared falling off that missionary pedestal. I feared finding out that I was truly not equipped for the work to which I had dedicated my life.
I came to hate the moment when I had to sit down and write my monthly reports. I assumed that what people wanted to hear about were the hundreds of baptisms that were occurring. Many times, I would sit in at my computer keyboard and stare at it, thinking, "What do I write about today?" "Well, I was here last month, and I’m still here."
III. WHAT IS MISSIONARY BURNOUT?
A. Definition
Burnout: The condition of being spiritually, emotionally and physically SPENT. . . . to have nothing more to offer, to have already drawn the last of one’s reserve resources.
To be truly burnt out is to be spiritually dead.
B. Causes
While at the NACC this year, I went about meeting with missionaries from various organizations and fields, asking about what they considered to be the main causes of missionary burnout. What was interesting is that, without exception, everyone knew exactly what I was talking about. Nobody asked, "Missionary Burnout, what’s that?" Here are the things people mentioned as contributing factors:
* Many said "culture shock." But I would say that it is not the big and obvious cultural differences that cause burnout. Rather, they are the subtle things that you don’t figure out until you’ve been on the field 5-7 years.
* Team related interpersonal conflicts. Not able to become a team player. Staff relationships. Unable to accept differences.
* Doing it all. A missionary often has to do everything...especially when it is a work from scratch.
* If you leave the field, you add guilt to the problem.
* Spiritual warfare.
* Frustrations with schooling the children.
* The feeling that people don’t appreciate what you’re doing for them.
* Allowing the mission to become your entire life.
C. Consequences
Many leave the field, never to realize the dream that originally moved them to serve God in another land.
It can cause total and irrecoverable spiritual death. We all know of missionaries who have not only given up on being missionaries, but who have given up on being Christians.
IV. HOW TO RECOVER AND/OR SUSTAIN EMOTIONAL & SPIRITUAL WHOLENESS
A. Returning to the Heart of God
He showed me the meaning of repentance as not just a turning away from sin, but of seeking after HIM . . . Returning to the heart of God ... allowing Him to be my sufficiency.
B. Discovering the Transactional Nature of Learning
What a relief it was for me to realize that Jesus is the teacher and that I am a fellow learner in the midst of this rich cross-cultural experience. There is much for me to learn from those to whom God has sent me.
From my Argentine brothers and sisters, and from the Argentine culture in general, I have learned the deep value of relationships over my personal goals and objectives.
I have learned to listen, to hear the real inner hurts, longings and fears of a people who have their own dreams and goals that have often been smashed and dashed to the ground by their own disappointments and countless setbacks.
C. Developing an invitational approach to evangelism.
My whole approach to inviting people to know God had not been very inviting at all. I had not listened to THEM to discover THEIR felt needs, perspectives on life, values, concerns, beliefs and fears. They were merely the materials from which I would build my dream. I had not taken the time to discover their dreams.
Christianity is supposed to be an invitation from God to humanity to come and to know the saving power of His kingdom and of His love. Unfortunately, most of what is called evangelism is not invitational at all. Instead of an effort to create an environment where people can freely respond to the invitation of God, it is often viewed as something we do TO people. We evangelize them. Just like processing companies homogenize and pasteurize milk, we evangelize sinners.
What a relief it was for me to realize that I cannot evangelize. I can only invite . . . create an environment that is conducive to finding Jesus.
Jesus said, "Follow me." His approach was fundamentally invitational. ... "You do not want to go away, too, do you?" (John 6:67).
D. Being invitational to myself.
I had to stop evaluating myself in comparison with others, to stop worrying about what the folks back home would think. Only by learning to love myself unconditionally am I able to share love with others.
* Intellectual development ... OI ... prior to this time I was stagnating intellectually. Continued personal development. Keep yourself intellectually challenged.
* I am also learning to have a life of my own! I will never again allow the mission to absorb all of who and what I am. To serve Jesus is not equivalent to serving my mission organization.
* Developing a positive and optimistic view of myself. Not driven by a need for recognition ... finding my recognition in Jesus. "Love your neighbor as you love yourself."
* Have realistic expectations. Don’t beat yourself for things that are outside your power to change (I Cor. 4:1-6).
"Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly." -- Peter Drucker (e.g. the model T Ford).
* Learn contentment (It’s not sin). Give the positive its full weight. Rejoice in what God is doing. Don’t count anything that God is doing as insignificant.
E. Finding a Few People Who Know How to Mix Encouragement and Confrontation
It is possible to continue being a blessing to people even when one is rapidly moving down the road toward burnout. Here lies the greatest danger. It takes someone with great gifts of observation to notice what is happening and great courage to confront.
CONCLUSION
Back in that crawlway, in the Mammoth Caves . . .
I heard behind me the voice of a fellow caver who was a professional rock climber and a Christian. He said, "Is that Greg up there?" I said, "Yes." He said, "Are you the missionary"? I said, "Yes." "Who watches over you?" he asked. "God does."
Soon after that, someone in front of me, looking back, said, "I can see what is happening. Your helmet is caught on a small stalagtite. You need to move your helmet to the left, then you will be able to continue forward."
I don’t know how I did it, but the helmet suddenly popped over to the left of the obstruction. I let the air out of my lungs, thrust with my feet and was able to clear the worst part of the squeeze. I was free once more to move forward. After that, the cieling of the crawlway began to rise again and I was soon able to walk upright.
Sometimes, the difference between giving up and moving forward is simply the presence of someone who can provide that special mixture of encouragement and direction . . . Someone who is willing to say, "God is with you, but you really should move that helmet to the left."
