The Anatomy of Conflict (Part 1)
James 4:1-3
Preached By Pastor Tony Miano
Pico Canyon Community Church
June 3, 2001
Introduction: It seems apropos that after Eric’s teaching on the importance of knowing love in order to know genuine holiness in our lives we would spend time this morning looking at something that keeps us from knowing genuine love and holiness. One thing that keeps believers from experiencing and sharing godly love and holiness, and that keeps us from living our lives covered by the umbrella of wisdom that comes down from our heavenly Father, is conflict.
As we begin our study of James 4 this morning, we are going to look at the anatomy of conflict. I hope that as we do, we will be better equipped to not only avoid the day-to-day conflicts in our lives that fail to bring God honor and glory, but that our study will also help us to equip others to do the same. What we will see in the first six verses of chapter four is this. The anatomy of conflict has three components— conflict with others (v. 1a), conflict within ourselves (vv. 1b-3), and the worst of all—conflict with God (vv. 4-6).
Let’s read James 4:1-6.
This morning we’ll begin our study of the anatomy of conflict by looking at conflict with others and the conflicts we face within ourselves. Next week we will spend our time studying what conflict with God looks like.
Conflict With Others
Some would have us believe that James is beginning a new topic, with the beginning of chapter four. Actually, what James is doing here is continuing the discussion from chapter three.
Remember that in verse eighteen James paints the positive picture of a peacemaker. What we see in the first part of chapter four is James’ explanation for why it was necessary to have peacemakers in the church. In a broader sense, seeing how James had just finished a to-the-point discussion about the two kinds of wisdom, James’ words tell us that what he saw in the church was a following of earthly wisdom, not godly wisdom from above.
James begins verse one with a question. “What is the source of quarrels and conflicts among you?” James’ question is a rhetorical one. He already had the answer and expected that his readers, as we will see in the remainder of the passage, knew the answer as well. James wants his readers to consider the conflict they have with others—specifically, with other members of the body of Christ.
The wording of the Greek text shows us that James’ tone is very stern and serious in verse one. There was a great deal of strife in the churches receiving James’ letter. From our study in past weeks, we know that there was conflict in the church between the rich and the poor.
We know that there was conflict between would-be teachers looking for their fifteen minutes of fame. One minute the members of these early churches would be praising God. The next minute they would be cussing at each other. We know that there were those in the church who, having recently come out of the legalistic system of Judaism, were harshly zealous; and that there were those in the church that had selfish ambition as the driving force behind whatever they did within the church.
Here at Pico Canyon, we want to follow the models given to us by the New Testament churches, but not all of them. You see—James’ readers were not the only churches facing problems. In his opening address to the Corinthian church, Paul had this to say. “For I have been informed concerning you, my brethren, by Chloe’s people, that there are quarrels among you” (I Cor. 1:11).
Toward the end of his second letter to the Corinthians, Paul gave this description of some of the members in the church. “For I am afraid that perhaps when I come I may find you to be not what I wish and may be found by you to be not what you wish; that perhaps there will be strife, jealousy, angry tempers, disputes, slanders, gossip, arrogance, disturbances. “I am afraid that when I come again my God may humiliate me before you, and I may mourn over many of those who have sinned in the past and not repented of the impurity, immorality, and sensuality which they have practiced” (II Cor. 12:20-21).
Knowing that the churches he was addressing were far from perfect, and probably knowing the state of the body of Christ elsewhere, James is ready to tackle the issue head on. “So,” James asks his readers in verse one, “what do you think is the cause of all of these problems you are having with each other?”
To make his point as strong as possible, James uses a couple of terms in a metaphorical sense. The NASB translates the two terms as “quarrels” and “conflicts,” and the NIV translates the two as “fights” and “quarrels.” This shows us how closely the two terms are related. James’ use of two terms so closely related gives what James is saying an even greater sense of urgency and seriousness. Let’s take a closer look at each and see just how serious was the situation in the church.
The first term, translated as “quarrels” or “fights,” comes from the Greek word polemos. In the New Testament, this word is most often used to speak of literal wars or battles. Let’s look at a couple of examples. In Matthew 24, we find Jesus talking to His disciples about some of the signs of His future return. Listen as I read, beginning in verse four. “And Jesus answered and said to them, ‘See to it that no one misleads you. For many will come in My name, saying, “I am the Christ,” and will mislead many’” (Matt. 24:4-5). We find the word James uses in verse 1, in Matthew 24:6. Jesus said, “You will be hearing of wars and rumors of wars. See that you are not frightened, for those things must take place but that is not yet the end.”
The writer of Hebrews, in describing the faith of several of the great military leaders of the Jewish people, wrote, “who by faith conquered kingdoms, performed acts of righteousness, obtained promises, shut the mouths of lions, quenched the power of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, from weakness were made strong, became mighty in war, put foreign armies to flight” (Hebrews 11:33-34).
It’s from this same Greek word that we also get the English word “polemics.” Noah Webster defined a person that engages in polemics as a person who supports “an opinion or system by controversy” (Webster, vol. 2, p.39). Polemics is an art that is most often attributed to theological discussions. That’s what James is referring to here. We can tell by the context of his letter that James is not using the word to refer to literal bloodshed within the church—although what he says in verse two may cause us to reconsider. James uses the word to refer to prolonged feuds, battles if you will, between church members over theological and practical issues.
The second term James uses to describe the situation in the church comes from the Greek word machai. Again, it is translated in verse one as either “conflicts” or “quarrels.” The difference between the two words is this. Whereas polemos refers to long-standing disputes or fights, the word machai refers to specific instances.
We can look at the words this way. Let’s say you and your spouse, your boyfriend or girlfriend have been upset with each other all day. The reason’s not important. This ongoing argument, this hostility, which usually means neither one of you is talking to the other, is what we see in the first word James uses to describe the scene in the church. Let’s say that during the day, whenever the two of you happen to be in the same room, one of you lets the other have it. One of you bursts out in a verbal barrage against the other and vents everything you have been holding inside since the last outburst. That’s what James is describing with the second word.
I want you also to notice that James uses both words in the plural. He does this to show his readers that he’s aware that these kind of bitter and hostile relationships are not simply an occasional blemish, but regular occurrences within the church family.
The first step in dealing with conflict is recognizing or admitting that conflict exists. So often, in order to make us look good, or the church look a little better, we Christians refer to conflict as “a difference of opinion.” If Christians are honest with themselves and with others they will admit that what is going on between people is much more than mere differences. In a simple difference of opinion, what results is a discussion or maybe a passionate debate. A difference of opinion does not result in two people or two groups refusing to talk to each other, or refusing to fellowship with each other. A simple difference of opinion does not cause our opinion about a person to change.
When a situation develops between you and another person, and that situation causes your relationship with that person to change in a negative way, you are in conflict with the other person. To call such a situation a difference of opinion is to say, “I don’t want to deal with this. Maybe if I do or say nothing, it will go away.” If we are truly going to understand the anatomy of conflict, then we must be able to identify conflict when it’s happening and be honest about its existence. But that’s not all. Conflict with others is only part of the anatomy of conflict.
Conflict With Ourselves
James asks a second rhetorical question in verse one. This one is worded in such a way that it demands a “yes” answer. James writes, “Is not the source your pleasures that wage war in your members?” With this question, James begins his discussion about the next part of the anatomy of conflict—conflict with ourselves. James is going to do a little finger-pointing here, and rightfully so.
So often when we have conflicts with others we are very quick to look at what the other person is doing to cause the problem. Now granted, each person is responsible for his or her own actions. But how often do we emphasize the other person’s responsibility while, at the same time, we’re unwilling to acknowledge our own? If we are going to truly understand the anatomy of conflict, we have to be willing and able to look at the conflicts within each of us.
James tells his readers that the source of the conflicts they have with others can be found in their own pleasures. The Greek word translated here, as pleasure, is hedone. From it we get the English word “hedonism.” Hedonism is the pursuit of whatever is pleasing. The hedonist thinks that if something is pleasurable it must be good. If you follow James’ train of thought through verse three, you can see that he is speaking of those pleasures that are sinful.
The only way the word is used in the New Testament is in reference to sinful cravings. Jesus used the word in the Parable of the Sower. In Luke 8:14 we read, “The seed which fell among the thorns, these are the ones who have heard, and as they go on their way they are choked with worries and riches and pleasures of this life, and bring no fruit to maturity.”
Paul used the same word when he wrote to Titus about godly living. “For we also once were disobedient, deceived, enslaved to various lusts and pleasures, spending our life in malice and envy, hateful, hating one another” (Titus 3:3).
The pleasures that people seek, even believers, are not just external. James writes that these pleasures “wage war in your members.” Before we move on to take a closer look at the pleasures James is talking about, we need to determine what James is referring to when he uses the word “members.”
There is a question here about whether this phrase refers to strife among church members or conflict within one’s own person. Although some very good scholars have argued for war among church members, context shows us that it is a raging battle within each individual church member and the various parts of their own bodies, their own person, that James is calling to mind.
James uses the Greek word melos for “members.” He has already used it twice in his letter, in verses 3:5 and 3:6. Listen and you’ll hear the word used in two ways. “So also the tongue is a small part of the body [there’s the first use], and yet it boasts of great things. See how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity; the tongue is set among our members [there’s the word again] as that which defiles the entire body [he uses a different Greek word for body here].”
James gets to the heart of the matter with the strong words of verse two. He begins the verse with a hard-hitting statement. “You lust and do not have, so you commit murder.” Often times when we think of the word lust, we think of it in the context of sexual desires. James is not limiting lust to just that one category. Here the word lust refers to any desire, sexual or otherwise, which is “misdirected and sinful” (MacArthur, p. 188). The internal conflict created by these misdirected, sinful longings can result in outward, visible actions of the worst kind.
When the desire of our hearts is to get what we want, regardless of the cost to ourselves or to others, it can cause us do unthinkable things. James says that the lust in our hearts can result in murder. Now, is he talking about the literal taking of another life, or is he talking about something else?
There are three main points of view regarding this issue. One is that James uses the word “murder” in the sense of envy. But there is really no Scriptural basis for taking the word to mean this. Plus, if James were using the word to mean envy, why would he bother to specifically mention envy later in the same verse?
Another point of view is that James is not speaking of the literal taking of another life, but of hatred. The apostle John thought this way when he wrote, “Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer; and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him” (I John 3:15).
The third point of view is that the word means what it says. James is speaking about people in the church being so angry that it leads to murder. Peter used the word this way in his first letter. Peter wrote, “Make sure that none of you suffers as a murderer, or thief, or evildoer, or a troublesome meddler” (I Peter 4:15).
In my own study, I think I would agree with Dr. Robert Thomas from The Master’s Seminary who sees what James is saying as a combination of the last two points of view. James is speaking about hatred so intense that it could lead or could have already led to murder within the church.
Remember, there were zealots among these new Christians, zealots that could have been intimately familiar with the generations of persecution faced by the Jewish people. There could have been those in the church that could have become violent when they believed their faith or their beliefs about their faith were at stake. James is telling his readers that the conflict within them is so intense; the lusts of their hearts are so great that it results in destructive behavior.
John MacArthur wrote, “When the lusting person cannot achieve his desired goals—whether for reputation, prestige, sexual gratification, money, power, escape through drugs or alcohol, success, possessions, the affections of another person, or whatever—the result is often catastrophic to others and always destructive to oneself” (MacArthur, p. 189).
The world, although it may be far more sophisticated and more technologically advanced than our ancient counterparts from James’ day, has not changed much when it comes to behavior. In fact, the behavior of our own society is every bit as depraved as it was 2,000 years ago, and even further back than that. Turn in your Bibles to Genesis 19.
In Genesis 19, we have the memorable story of Sodom and Gomorrah. God told Abraham, after a very interesting conversation, that He would spare the cities if He found just ten righteous people within their walls. So the Lord sent two angels to Sodom and they were invited into Lot’s home. It wasn’t long before the men of the town—verse four tells us both young and old—were at Lot’s door demanding that Lot send the two visitors out so the men and boys of the town could have sexual relations with them. Lot, operating under wisdom that was earthly, unspiritual, and demonic stood at his open doorway and offered to send his two virgin daughters out to the perverts of the town.
The angels grabbed Lot by the shoulders, pulled him back into the house, and closed the door. And this brings us to the verse I want to focus on—verse eleven. It says, “They [the angels] struck the men who were at the doorway of the house with blindness, both small and great, so that they wearied themselves trying to find the doorway.” Their lust was so great that they could care less that every man in town instantaneously and simultaneously lost their sight. Their cravings were so evil, so overpowering that they crawled around in the dirt until their knees and palms were probably bloody and sore, trying to get to the two angelic visitors.
Now, some of you may hear about people in James’ churches hating each other to the point of contemplating homicide; some of you may hear about the grotesque behavior of the men of Sodom and think, “How does any of this apply to me?”
Aren’t we all, in some way or another like the men of Sodom—not that any of us are involved in the same kind of deplorable, immoral conduct as the men of this ancient town? But haven’t we all, at some point in our lives, groped around, seemingly blind, trying to satisfy our own selfish wants and desires? Haven’t we all wanted something so badly that we were frustrated, even bitterly angered because we couldn’t have it? Am I the only one who has ever had difficulty taking “no” for an answer? Am I?
Please tell me I’m not the only person here today that, on occasion, has set out to get what I want for no other reason than I want it and I was able to convince myself that I had the right to have it. As you chew on that for a few minutes, let’s see what else James has to say about the inner conflict of man.
James also says in verse two, “You are envious and cannot obtain; so you fight and quarrel.” The word “envious” comes from the same root word translated as “jealousy” in verses 3:14 and 3:16. It is synonymous with the word translated as “lust” in the beginning of verse two, but it carries with it an even stronger, emotional desire.
What James is describing here is coveting. Look at how the word is used elsewhere in the New Testament. For instance, In Acts 7:9, during Stephen’s great sermon to the Jews who were standing by with rocks in their hands, waiting to kill him, he said, “The patriarchs became jealous of Joseph and sold him into Egypt. Yet God was with him.”
Stephen reminded his Jewish audience about the way Joseph’s brothers coveted Joseph’s relationship with his father, Jacob. The brothers longed for such a relationship and when they could not get it they attacked Joseph and sold him into slavery.
Eric spent a little time in our next passage last week. In Acts 17 we find Paul ministering in Thessalonica. Verse five says, “But the Jews, becoming jealous and taking along some wicked men from the market place, formed a mob and set the city in an uproar; and attacking the house of Jason, they were seeking to bring them out to the people” (Acts 17:5).
The Jewish leaders did not like the idea that Paul was preaching in the synagogue and drawing people away from the legalistic system they had constructed that went beyond the Law God handed down to Moses. They coveted Paul’s influence over the people. They were use to having such influence and hated the idea of giving it up. But the Jewish leadership could do nothing to regain their power and control over the people whom God was calling to Himself. Not being able to obtain what they so desperately wanted, they formed a mob and attacked Jason’s house, looking to capture Paul and Silas.
Attention and influence—two things every human being desires. Sadly, because of mankind’s sinful nature, when he can’t lawfully, morally, or ethically obtain the things he wants, he will manipulate situations and people or flat-out steal to get it. Stephen saw this first hand in Jerusalem. Paul and Silas saw it in Thessalonica. And Peter saw it, too.
Turn in your Bibles to Acts 5. Luke, the writer of the Book of Acts, ends chapter four by mentioning Barnabas’ act of obedience and giving. Barnabas sold a piece of property and took all of the proceeds and laid it at the apostles’ feet. Chapter five begins with another real estate transaction, with slightly different results.
“But a man named Ananias, with his wife Sapphira, sold a piece of property, and kept back some of the price for himself, with his wife’s full knowledge, and bringing a portion of it, he laid it at the apostles’ feet.”
“But Peter said, ‘Ananias, why has Satan filled your heart to lie to the Holy Spirit and to keep back some of the price of the land? While it remained unsold, did it not remain your own? And after it was sold, was it not under your control? Why is it that you have conceived this deed in your heart? You have not lied to men but to God.’”
“And as he heard these words, Ananias fell down and breathed his last; and great fear came over all who heard of it. The young men got up and covered him up, and after carrying him out, they buried him. Now there elapsed an interval of about three hours, and his wife came in, not knowing what had happened. And Peter responded to her, ‘Tell me whether you sold the land for such and such a price?’ And she said, ‘Yes, that was the price.’ Then Peter said to her, ‘Why is it that you have agreed together to put the Spirit of the Lord to the test? Behold, the feet of those who have buried your husband are at the door, and they will carry you out as well.’”
“And immediately she fell at his feet and breathed her last, and the young men came in and found her dead, and they carried her out and buried her beside her husband. And great fear came over the whole church, and over all who heard of these things.”
Because of Ananias and Sapphira’s lust for money, their insatiable need to obtain and keep more for themselves, they concocted a story that they thought would make them look good in the eyes of the apostles and in the eyes of the church. The couple managed to convince each other that they deserved to keep some of the money for themselves and that they were giving the church enough money, maybe even more than anyone else.
The point of the story isn’t that Ananias and Sapphira owed the church all of the proceeds from the sale of the property. The point is that because of their greed, because of their covetous, selfish lust; the couple lied and gave with corrupt motives and intentions. Have you ever done anything like this? I have. Although the situation I’m about to describe is not my own, I’ve shared the same mindset in some of my past decision-making.
It’s payday and this check is plump with some extra overtime pay. It’s time to pay the bills. It’s also time to give to the church. You start to write the check for your tithe and you stop just as you get to the amount. You’ve made a commitment to God to give 10% of your gross income, realizing that everything you have is a gift from Him to begin with.
But you look at your check ledger and see that you were a little purchase-happy during the last few weeks. Of course everything you bought were things you needed, so you’ve convinced yourself. You know you need to pay your bills. You don’t want to do anything that might adversely affect your credit. You also see that you’ve got some big plans for the next couple of weeks. You’re going to finally get to go to a Dodger game. That’s gonna cost a hundred bucks. You’ve also waited a long time to purchase that new boat. The overtime on this week’s check is going to finally give you enough for the down payment.
You remember your commitment to tithe and then you think about your buddy across the street. He has a new boat and he’s nowhere near as good as you are about money. He doesn’t even go to church. His priorities are all screwed up. You think to yourself, “Why should he live as if he’s blessed while I am the one who is supposed to be blessed?” Then the wheels really start turning. “You know,” you say to yourself, “Getting this boat is kind of like tithing. I can use it to spend some time out at the lake with my unbelieving neighbor and his new boat.”
“Maybe if I buy this boat, I can use it as a witnessing tool. That’s perfect! I mean—that’s spiritual.”
“Besides,” you continue to rationalize in your mind, “When I committed to giving 10% of my gross income, I really meant 10% of my regular gross income. As long as my check to the church is the same as it usually is, no one will be the wiser. I worked the extra hours. The overtime is mine. Yah, that works.”
So you have yourself convinced. But now you have to convince your spouse. And ladies, just because the person in this story is a guy, don’t think for a second that women are immune to this line of thinking. You find your wife in the living room stealing a moment of peace before the kids come home from school. You’re about to completely ruin that.
You look at you wife with that impish smile she’s come to dread and you make a statement that, by now, sends chills down her spine. “Honey,” you say somewhat cautiously, “I’ve been thinking.” Before your patient bride can get the words “oh no” out of her mouth, you make your pitch. Your spouse hears you out, but all the while you notice a slight shaking of her head.
You make what you think are several good points, but she doesn’t buy it. And you find yourself in yet another argument about money. Once again you think of something that you really want, that you think you ought to have, and you’re not going to get it, so you fight and quarrel about it.
“Marital conflicts, family conflicts, job conflicts, national conflicts—all these are the result of unsatisfied personal lust and envying” (MacArthur, p. 189). I know that there have been times in my own life when I have become angry with Mahria, not because she has done anything wrong, not because she has offended me in anyway, but because the desires of my own heart are unfulfilled. When I do this, my lust to have things according to my own personal satisfaction reveals the selfishness of my desires. James deals with this in verses 2c-3.
James writes, “You do not have because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, so that you may spend it on your pleasures.” Did you notice that something was missing from the scenario I shared with you? The man who struggled with his financial decision spent no time in prayer over the issue. Likewise, James tells his readers that there are those in their midst that do not have because they continually fail to ask of God.
Why would a believer do that? Why would anyone who has put their faith, hope, and trust in Jesus Christ for salvation, which can never be taken away, fail not once, but continually, to seek the Lord in prayer for the things they desire? While you think on that question, here’s another. When the Christian asks something of God, why doesn’t he or she receive what they ask? James gives us the answer to both these questions in one very poignant phrase. And we find it in verse three. “You ask and do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives.”
I have found in my own life that when I’m in a position to make an important decision and I fail to pray about it, often times the reason is that I know in my heart that what I want to pray for is not what God would will for my life. Or I do pray and I don’t receive what I asked for because my motivation for praying is wrong, or, as the Greek would be more literally translated, my motives are just plain evil. James can make the assertion that some pray with evil motives because, as he writes in the last phrase of verse three, their focus is on their own pleasures.
The intention of their heart when they pray is to receive something so they can spend it, literally “spend it freely” on themselves. It’s not that they ask for sinful things. The problem is that they ask, possibly for good things, for the wrong reasons. The kind of prayers James is referring to are those that benefits no one but the one praying. There is no genuine sense of helping another person, and there’s certainly no sense of wanting to obey God or please Him. The bottom line to prayers such as these is, “What’s in it for me?”
Remember I asked you a few moments ago why a believer would pray this way? Although what James writes in verses two and three can certainly apply to the Christian (I know they have certainly applied to my life), James is actually placing his focus on the unbeliever, the person in the church that claims to have a genuine faith in Christ, or at least would like everyone to believe that he or she does.
Certainly a Christian can pray at times with wrong motives, like a couple I use to know, a couple whose faith in Christ I do not question, a couple, though, who convinced themselves that God was leading them to spend thousands of dollars on a swimming pool so that they could use it for God’s service, as a baptismal font. If you chuckle as you hear that and question the couple’s sincerity or their motives, is it not likely that God questioned it, too. They got the pool. But was it God’s will or their own pleasures?
But the unbeliever continually prays with wrong motives, if they pray at all. The writer of Hebrews tells us, “without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him” (Hebrews 11:6).
I’ve often been asked if God hears and answers the prayers of the unbeliever. My answer is always, “No, with one exception.” Let me explain. If a person has not put their faith in God, by acknowledging and submitting to His Son Jesus Christ as his or her Lord and Savior, then whatever they pray for will, on some level, include a self-serving motive. The purpose of their prayer cannot be to honor, glorify, and please a Savior they do not know.
Is it any wonder that God would not answer a prayer like this? God is in no way obligated to grant a request from anyone, for anything that is requested for nothing more than self-seeking gratification. I appreciate what Simon Kistemaker wrote in his comments on this last phrase of verse three. He wrote, “God refuses to listen to men who eagerly pursue selfish pleasures. Greed is idolatry and that is an abomination in the sight of God. God does not listen to prayers that come from a heart filled with selfish motives. Covetousness and selfishness are insults to God” (Kistemaker, p. 133).
There is but one prayer from the lips of an unbeliever that God hears and answers. It is the prayer of genuine repentance—the prayer of one who cries out to God acknowledging their sinfulness, seeking His forgiveness, and to receive the free gift of eternal life that is given to those whom God chooses to extend His grace and mercy. That is the first prayer God ever truly answered for me, and, if you are here this morning and have not yielded to God’s calling of you to Himself, it will be the first prayer He answers for you.
How do I know this to be true? Listen as I share with you the Scriptures. I’ve listed them in your sermon notes so you can study them at your leisure. But for now, just listen to the Word of God.
Psalm 34:15-17 says, “The eyes of the LORD are toward the righteous and His ears are open to their cry. The face of the LORD is against evildoers, to cut off the memory of them from the earth. The righteous cry, and the LORD hears and delivers them out of all their troubles.” The psalmist is not talking about those who are self-righteous, or righteous in the eyes of the world, but those who have been declared righteous by God’s grace.
Psalm 145:18 says, “The LORD is near to all who call upon Him, to all who call upon Him in truth.” Remember, it was Jesus who said, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me” (John 14:6b).
And let’s listen to the words of the Lord Himself, which we find in Luke 18. “And He also told this parable to some people who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and viewed others with contempt: ‘Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood and was praying this to himself: “God, I thank You that I am not like other people: swindlers, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I pay tithes of all that I get.’”
‘But the tax collector, standing some distance away, was even unwilling to lift up his eyes to heaven, but was beating his breast, saying, “God, be merciful to me, the sinner!” I tell you, this man went to his house justified rather than the other; for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but he who humbles himself will be exalted’ (Luke 18:9-14).
Both of the men in the parable are unbelievers. One prayed with pride and arrogance, assuming that God would answer because he thought God owed him something. His pray went unheard—not because God couldn’t hear it. There was just no reason for God to give it any attention. The other unbeliever, cried out to God for forgiveness because he recognized his sin and His need for God’s redemption. His prayer was heard.
If you are here this morning and you want God to hear your prayers, if you want to know how to pray according to His will, if you want the desires of your heart to be consistent with the desires God has for you, then you must first repent and acknowledge Jesus Christ as Lord of your life. You may be able to go somewhere else and hear a message that leaves you feeling like God wants to give you the desires of your heart without you having to sacrifice a thing in the process, but you won’t find that message here.
In this church you will hear, “The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, You will not despise” (Psalm 51:17). If God is calling you to Himself, it is not judgment and condemnation that you hear in these words. If the Lord is calling you today, you will hear hope and the path to true joy and happiness.
If the Lord is calling you today and you answer, then the pleasures you will seek will be righteous and pleasing to God—not always, because coming to faith in Christ does not make us perfect. But where self-indulgence was once your primary motivation, it will be replaced by a heart’s desire to please God. That’s why Paul could write to the Corinthians, “Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come” (II Cor. 5:17).
God wants His children to enjoy the things He has for them. Once a person, by the call of God and the leading of His Holy Spirit, has repented of their sin as a result of a genuine faith in Christ, the pleasures of God awaits him or her.
There is pleasure in the simple and profound truth that security belongs to the one who truly trusts in the Lord. Although the pleasures of man are tainted, the pleasures of God are not. All truly good pleasures have God as their source. “This is why the psalmist pursued God” (Hughes, p. 171). In Psalm 42 we read, “As the deer pants for the water brooks, so my soul pants for You, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God” (Psalm 42:1-2a).
We’ve seen what conflict looks like with other people. We’ve looked, at length, at the conflict that rages within ourselves. May it bring each of us to an honest assessment of who we are and what motivates us to do the things we do. And with God’s truth in mind, and with repentance and thanksgiving on our lips, let’s come to the Lord’s Table together. Let’s pray.
