Good news about discipling children
Pro.23:13-14
by Andrew Chan Senior Pastor, PBC, Vancouver, BC
Being a parent changes everything. But being a parent also changes with each baby. Here are some of the ways having a second and third child is different from having your first.
1) Your Clothes
1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.
2) Preparing for the Birth
1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
2nd baby: You don’t bother practicing because you remember that last time, breathing didn’t do a thing.
3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your 8th month.
3) The Nursery
1st baby: You pre-wash your newborn’s clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby’s little bureau.
2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can’t they?
4) Worries
1st baby: At the first sign of distress - a whimper, a frown-you pick up the baby.
2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.
3rd baby: You teach your 3-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.
5) Pacifier
1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it.
2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby’s bottle.
3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.
6) Diapering
1st baby: You change your baby’s diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.
2nd baby: You change their diaper every 2 to 3 hours, if needed.
3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.
7) Activities
1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour.
2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.
8) Going Out
1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home 5 times.
2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.
3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.
9) At Home
1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn’t squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.
10) Swallowing Coins
1st child: when first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays.
2nd child: when 2nd child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for coin to pass.
3rd child: when 3rd child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!!
None of these thoughts are original to me...
In Hebrews 12:5-11 (see below) we find that God disciplines his children. It is not child abuse to lovingly correct a child¡¦s foolish ways. Therefore, we must not be fearful to discipline. Where there is no discipline, according to Scripture, the child is abused.
5 And have you entirely forgotten the encouraging words God spoke to you, his children? He said,
¡§My child, don¡¦t ignore it when the Lord disciplines you,
and don¡¦t be discouraged when he corrects you.
6 For the Lord disciplines those he loves,
and he punishes those he accepts as his children.¡¨
7 As you endure this divine discipline, remember that God is treating you as his own children. Whoever heard of a child who was never disciplined? 8 If God doesn¡¦t discipline you as he does all of his children, it means that you are illegitimate and are not really his children after all. 9 Since we respect our earthly fathers who disciplined us, should we not all the more cheerfully submit to the discipline of our heavenly Father and live forever?
10 For our earthly fathers disciplined us for a few years, doing the best they knew how. But God¡¦s discipline is always right and good for us because it means we will share in his holiness. 11 No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening¡Xit is painful! But afterward there will be a quiet harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.
So¡K.
Don¡¦t fail to correct your children. They won¡¦t die if you spank them. Physical discipline may well save them from death.
Proverbs 23:13-14 (NLT)
A youngster¡¦s heart is filled with foolishness, but discipline will drive it away.
Proverb 22:15 (NLT)
God sees children as important. They are a blessing. Psalm 127:3-5 is clear:
Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD,
The fruit of the womb is a reward.
Like arrows in the hand of a warrior,
So are the children of one¡¦s youth.
Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them¡K
This is fantastic news for in biblical times children are not as well regarded as they ought to be.
„h Jesus apparently regarded children to be important in God¡¦s kingdom.
Matthew 18:1-6 (NLT)
About that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, ¡§Which of us is greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven?¡¨
2 Jesus called a small child over to him and put the child among them. 3 Then he said, I assure you, unless you turn from your sins and become as little children, you will never get into the Kingdom of Heaven. 4 Therefore, anyone who becomes as humble as this little child is the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven. 5 And anyone who welcomes a little child like this on my behalf is welcoming me. 6 But if anyone causes one of these little ones who trusts in me to lose faith, it would be better for that person to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone tied around the neck.
„h Children are precious so dear to God¡¦s heart that He commands that adults are to tell the children to love God and have a correct view of Him.
Deut.6:4-9 (CEV)
4 Listen, Israel! The LORD our God is the only true God! 5 So love the LORD your God with all your heart, soul, and strength. 6 Memorize his laws 7 and tell them to your children over and over again. Talk about them all the time, whether you¡¦re at home or walking along the road or going to bed at night, or getting up in the morning. 8 Write down copies and tie them to your wrists and foreheads to help you obey them. 9 Write these laws on the door frames of your homes and on your town gates.
„h This priority to children is reflected in the way God views all the people belonging to Him
I John 3:1 (NLT)
Think how much the Father loves us. He loves us so much that he lets us be called his children, as we truly are.
In disciplining children, we too must be disciplined¡K
1. Pray
A. Pray for our children
Lots of people come to receive Christ as their Lord and Savior before age 18.
B. Pray for workers
He said to his disciples, ¡§The harvest is so great, but the workers are so few. So
pray to the Lord who is in charge of the harvest; ask him to send out more workers for his fields.¡¨ Matt. 9:37-38 (NLT)
2. Practice
A. Set a godly example for children
Colossians 3:12-19 (NLT)
12 Since God chose you to be the holy people whom he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. 13 You must make allowance for each other¡¦s faults and forgive the person who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. 14 And the most important piece of clothing you must wear is love. Love is what binds us all together in perfect harmony. 15 And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are all called to live in peace. And always be thankful.
16 Let the words of Christ, in all their richness, live in your hearts and make you wise. Use his words to teach and counsel each other. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts. 17 And whatever you do or say, let it be as a representative of the Lord Jesus, all the while giving thanks through him to God the Father.
18 You wives must submit to your husbands, as is fitting for those who belong to the Lord. 19 And you husbands must love your wives and never treat them harshly.
¡§We¡¦ve all heard the expression that when you have children you
have a tape recorder in your house. For the most part that is true,
not everything your says comes from your home. But we have to
know that there are hungry ears and eyes that are watching and
listening to what we say and how we act and react.¡¨
3. Provide
A. Provide financially for ministry to children
2 Cor.9: 6-7 (NLT)
6 Remember this¡Xa farmer who plants only a few seeds will get a small crop. But the one who plants generously will get a generous crop. 7 You must each make up your own mind as to how much you should give. Don¡¦t give reluctantly or in response to pressure. For God loves the person who gives cheerfully.
B. Provide varied ministries to children
Examples: Wed. nights Pioneer Club, Sunday school, Small Groups, Vacation
Bible School, Backyard clubs, etc.
We need to be creative in our ways to reach the children.
C. Provide an atmosphere of unconditional love.
John 13:34-35 (NKJV)
34¡§A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. 35¡§By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.¡¨
Final Thought:
Our children are precious. We have to understand that we have been given in their young age, a window of opportunity to affect and influence them to become lovers and followers of Christ. It won¡¦t happen automatically, but with God¡¦s help and counsel we will be able to respond to challenges of parenting and disciplining. So let¡¦s be careful as we witness with our lives of God¡¦s transforming Word to bring them up in discipline of the Lord.
