MELVIN NEWLAND, MINISTER
CENTRAL CHRISTIAN, BROWNSVILLE, TX
ILL. I came across a little ditty that went something like this:
Some go to church to laugh & talk, & some go there to walk the walk.
Some go to church to meet a friend, & some go there an hour to spend.
Some go to church to find a bride, & some go there a fault to hide.
Some go to church to celebrate, & some go there to agitate.
Some go to church to doze & nod, but the wise go there to worship God.
A. Several times we have talked together about worship, & as we did we saw that worship includes many things.
But this morning let’s look at a dimension of worship that is often overlooked. Most of what we usually call worship could be described as “vertical” worship, where we lift up our voices together in praise & prayer to Heaven. But there is also a “horizontal” dimension to worship in which we reach out in fellowship to those around us.
Acts 2:42 says about the early Christians, “They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching & to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread & to prayer.”
Now the word “fellowship” has as its basic meaning the idea of sharing with one another, of serving one another, of our relationship with one another. And there are many “one another” passages in the Bible.
But this morning I particularly want to call your attention to Romans 16:16 where the Apostle Paul says, “Greet one another with a holy kiss.” And in this chapter he mentions a number of people to be greeted.
B. Now you realize, of course, that there are some people who expect, even demand, the attention of others.
In Luke 11 Jesus discusses the Pharisees. And if you ever want to find out how not to do it, just study the Pharisees. It seems like those guys never got it right. Jesus is talking about the Pharisees, & He says, “They walk around the market place all dressed up in fine robes. They look so dignified, & they expect a greeting,” He says.
You see, there are people who seem to say, “Well, here I am. Everybody notice me!” And there are others who say, “There you are. I’ve noticed you.” The Pharisees were “Here I am” people. And Jesus is a “There you are” person who really is concerned about others.
In Matthew 5, Jesus said, “Don’t just love your own kind. Don’t just love those who love you & who are nice to you. Why, even the pagans & tax collectors do that.”
And James said, “Never show partiality. When the rich come, don’t just automatically give them the best seats in the house. Treat everybody the same.” In fact, James even said, “If you show partiality to people, then you sin.”
PROP. So let’s consider for a few moments this horizontal aspect of worship as we greet one another & fellowship with each other. We are to reach out to one another - take the initiative - & be generous with our greetings.
PROP. When you do that there are at least 4 things that happen.
I. YOU ACKNOWLEDGE PEOPLE
A. First of all, you acknowledge people. In Romans 16:3 Paul says, “Greet Priscilla & Aquila, my fellow workers in Christ Jesus. They risked their lives for me. Not only I but all the churches of the Gentiles are grateful to them.”
Then the goes on to say, “Greet also the church that meets at their house. Greet my dear friend Epenetus, who was the first convert to Christ in the province of Asia. Greet Mary, who worked very hard for you. Greet Andronicus & Junias, my relatives who have been in prison with me. They are outstanding among the apostles, & they were in Christ before I was” [Romans 16:4-7].
Do you feel it? Paul is saying, “Reach out. Extend generous greetings to these people.” Someone has pointed out that about half of the people in this list are either slaves or women, people who had very little influence or power in the community. So Paul is not name-dropping here.
He’s not saying, “Here are all these important people that I know, & I want you to be nice to them.” He’s naming common, ordinary people. He’s saying, “You make them feel welcome. Reach out to them, & communicate your love to them.”
B. That’s exactly what the church needs to do. Maybe we need to do it more now than at any other time in the history of the church. We’re living in a society where families have changed so much.
A few years ago we defined the average family as consisting of a “husband & wife with 2.5 children. They lived in a house in the suburbs with a white picket fence, & they cooked hamburgers in the backyard on Saturday afternoon.”
But today’s concept of an average family has to take into account single parents with children. And in our transient society the family is often moving from one city to another, from one side of the country to the other.
They move to a new community & a new job. They move into a new neighborhood & they think, “We’ll make some good friends here.” But they find high fences between themselves & their neighbors because everyone wants privacy. They go to work & may make a few friends there. But it seems to be a “dog eat dog” world, & fellow workers don’t always share the same values.
Then they come to church. And what do they find? Is it any different at church? Are we sometimes exclusive & self-centered, just talking to people we know & like, doing exactly what Jesus told us not to do?
You see, in today’s world the church is needed to fulfill the role of family for many. And that’s not easy to do. It’s much easier just to talk to people that you know well, & who share your same interests. It’s a lot easier to do that.
But the Bible teaches us that we’re not to show partiality, but to be open to all, even to those who are strangers to us.
C. Do you think our church is warm & friendly? When you walk in the door, what is your impression about the people & the building? Do we seem to be saying, “We’re glad you’re here? We hope you’ll want to come again & again. We want you here. You’re special, not only in God’s sight, but also in ours. We care about you & your family. We care about where you’re going. And we want to share God’s love with you.” Do you sense that when you come here? Or do you feel unwelcome?
I think the church, more than any other organization, needs to practice greeting one another. Now we try to do that by having greeters at the door, & by providing a time to greet one another at the beginning of the service. And when the service is over we try to greet you again as you go, because we’re glad you’re here & we want you to come back.
But deep friendships aren’t formed in just a few moments. So what we need to do, in my estimation, is to encourage the gift of hospitality, of meeting together in our homes. Some of our strongest relationships are made as we gather together after a service or in small group Bible Studies & fellowships.
SUM. You see, “greeting one another” is more than just a handshake. It’s looking at someone & saying, “In my book you count. You’re worth something. I’d like to spend more time with you. I’d like to find out how you think & what you feel & how you believe.” That’s acknowledging people. That’s greeting people in the Lord.
II. WE COMMEND ACCOMPLISHMENTS
There’s a second thing that happens as we greet one another. We not only acknowledge people, but we also commend accomplishments.
Look at the first two verses in the 16th chapter of Romans. Paul says, “I commend to you our sister Phoebe, a servant of the church in Cenchrea. I ask you to receive her in the Lord in a way worthy of the saints & to give her any help she may need from you, for she has been a great help to many people, including me.”
Now what is Paul doing? He is commending Phoebe’s accomplishments. Notice what he says. He says, “She’s our sister in the Lord. She’s a servant of the church. She’s helped a lot of people. She’s even helped me. So, I’m commending her to you.”
So what does it mean to “commend someone’s accomplishments”? It means to show respect. It means that we build someone up. We have the power with our tongue to either enhance, or to destroy.
That’s why the Bible goes to great lengths teaching us about the tongue & what an important member of the body it is. You can use it to build people up, or you can use it to tear people down. You can criticize, or you can praise.
Now some people think that you can change people by criticizing all the things they don’t do right. But it’s not true. It’s when you praise people, when you compliment the things they are doing well, that they begin to grow & mature.
So when we greet one another, we commend accomplishments. We build that person up.
III. WE EXPRESS AFFECTION
Here’s a third thing we do, “We express affection.” Notice again what Paul says in Romans 16:16. He says, “Greet one another with a holy kiss.” Now you knew I was going to get there sooner or later, didn’t you?
How do you respond to that? Do you say, “My goodness, what was going on in that church?” Or do you say, “Well, I think that’s nice. That’s a warm, friendly greeting”?
Well, Paul is basically saying, “Pay attention to each other, & greet each other.” In his time, the holy kiss was a common & accepted greeting. It still is in some parts of the world. But in our culture it is not a common form of greeting. Instead, we shake hands or hug each other. And it wouldn’t be wrong to give a “holy kiss” as long as it is holy. You see, the need for human touch is as real today as it has ever been.
Jesus knew that, so He reached out & touched the untouchables. He touched the lepers - nobody touched lepers. He touched children - nobody had time for children. He even reached out & touched tax-collectors.
And we have untouchables in our society, too. The elderly, the poor, the sick - those who yearn for human touch & seldom if ever receive it. We need to learn how to express holy affection in a physical way that communicates our love & concern for others.
IV. WE CONFER A BLESSING
Finally, there’s a fourth thing that happens when we greet one another, & that is to confer a blessing.
Romans 15:33 says, “The God of peace be with you all. Amen.” 1 Corinthians 16:23,24 says, “The grace of the Lord Jesus be with you. My love to all of you in Christ Jesus. Amen.” In Galatians 6:18 Paul writes, “The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit, brothers. Amen.” Now what are those? Those are blessings that Paul is conferring on the church as he writes to them.
Some of you used to go to churches where at the end of the service the preacher would raise his hand & say something like, “Now may the peace of God go with you. Amen.” He was pronouncing a blessing on the congregation before they left. I think we’ve lost that. But it is just as valid as it has ever been.
In fact, it is very much an OT custom – fathers blessing their children & leaders blessing their people. Sometimes it was conferred prophetically, & sometimes it was conferred in a prayer.
The loss of a blessing in the OT was considered to be a curse. You can hear the words of Esau when he lost his blessing, when he was tricked out of it by his twin brother Jacob. And he cries out, “Oh Father, bless me.”
Now how do you feel about conferring a blessing on someone? A blessing is simply asking God’s favor on someone else. And our love for them is used as the channel to confer that blessing. In other words, if I really care about you then through my love for you I ask God to bless you.
Now that’s exactly what God has done. Through Jesus Christ, God has conferred a blessing on us. In fact, all of these things that we have talked about is exactly what God has done through Jesus. He has acknowledged you as an important person. God so loves you that He sent his only begotten Son into the world.
So God is saying through Jesus Christ, “You’re very important to me. And don’t you think for a moment that you’re not. I don’t care what the rest of the world says. Don’t you ever forget how important you are to me.”
He has commended our accomplishments. “You’re doing a good work, & keep on doing it. I will complete the work I have started in you. Just keep on keeping on.”
He expresses affection for us. Again & again He embraces us & loves us when we come to worship him. And finally, through Jesus, He confers the blessing of life eternal.
It’s a lot like the prodigal son who comes home. No matter how far we have gone into the far country, He’s there waiting to embrace us, to express His love for us, & to welcome us back into the family again.
ILL. Please listen to this story. It’s kind of long, but I think you’ll appreciate it.
While waiting to pick up a friend at the airport I had one of those life-changing experiences that you hear other people talk about. This one occurred a mere 2 feet away from me.
Straining to locate my friend among the passengers deplaning through the jet way, I noticed a man coming toward me carrying 2 bags. He stopped right next to me to greet his family.
First he motioned to his youngest son (maybe 6 years old) as he laid down his bags. They gave each other a long, loving hug. As they separated enough to look in each other’s face, I heard the father say, “It’s so good to see you, son. I missed you so much!” His son smiled somewhat shyly & replied softly, “Me, too, Dad!’
Then the man stood up, gazed in the eyes of his oldest son (maybe 9 or 10) & while cupping his son’s face in his hands said, “You’re already quite the young man. I love you very much, Zach!” They too hugged a most loving, tender hug.
While this was happening, a baby girl (perhaps 1 or 1½) was squirming excitedly in her mother’s arms, never once taking her little eyes of the wonderful sight of her returning father. The man said, “Hi, baby girl!” as he gently took the child from her mother. He quickly kissed her face & then held her close to his chest. The little girl instantly relaxed & laid her head on his shoulder, motionless in pure contentment.
After several moments, he handed his daughter to his oldest son & declared, “I’ve saved the best for last!” & proceeded to give his wife the longest kiss I ever remember seeing. He gazed into her eyes for several seconds & then silently mouthed, “I love you so much!” They stared at each other’s eyes, beaming big smiles at one another, while holding both hands.
For an instant they reminded me of newlyweds, but I knew by the age of their kids that they couldn’t possibly be. I puzzled about it for a moment, then realized how totally engrossed I was in the wonderful display of unconditional love not more than an arm’s length away from me.
I suddenly felt uncomfortable, as if I was invading something sacred, but was amazed to hear my own voice nervously ask, “Wow! How long have you two been married?” “Twelve years,” he replied. “Well then, how long have you been away?” I asked. The man finally turned & looked at me, still beaming his joyous smile. “Two whole days!” he replied.
Two days? I was stunned. By the intensity of the greeting, I had assumed he’d been gone for at least several weeks – if not months. I know my expression betrayed me. I said almost offhandedly, hoping to end my intrusion with some semblance of grace, “I hope my marriage is still that passionate after 12 years.”
The man suddenly stopped smiling. He looked me straight in the eye, & with a forcefulness that burned right into my soul, he told me something that left me a different person. He told me, “Don’t hope, friend… decide!” Then he flashed me his wonderful smile again, shook my hand & said, “God bless!”
With that, he & his family turned & strode away together. I was still watching that man & his family walk out of sight when my friend arrived & asked, “What are you looking at?” Without hesitating, & with a curious sense of certainty, I replied, “My future!”
This morning if you’re here & you don’t know Jesus as your Lord & Savior, we invite you to come & accept Him today. If you’re here & you have never experienced what it is to be in Christ & to be a part of his family, to have brothers & sisters who share your faith & want to build you up & greet you, then we invite you to become a part of this church family & that, most of all, you’ll decide to give your heart & life to Jesus. So we extend to you His invitation.
