James says, “No man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness” (James 3:8-9). James includes himself as one having this problem, for he says that “no man can tame the tongue,” and he uses the word “we” throughout the passage. We can all include ourselves here as well, can we not? I find myself cringing as I read this passage of Scripture, because I think about the things I have said and how my tongue has wagged. The tongue is truly a restless evil. How many times I have run my mouth before my brain was in gear. How many times I thought I knew something and started talking before I really bothered to find out the truth for sure. How many times I have assumed something, only to find out later I was wrong.
There was a humorous poem going around the internet awhile back called “The Cookie Thief.” It went like this:
A woman was waiting at an airport one night,
With several long hours before her flight.
She hunted for a book in the airport shops,
Bought a bag of cookies and found a place to drop.
She was engrossed in her book but happened to see,
That the man sitting beside her, as bold as could be.
Grabbed a cookie or two from the bag in between,
Which she tried to ignore to avoid a bad scene.
So she munched the cookies and watched the clock,
As the gutsy cookie thief diminished her stock.
She was getting more irritated as the minutes ticked by,
Thinking, “If I wasn’t so nice, I would blacken his eye.”
With each cookie she took, he took one too,
When only one was left, she wondered what he would do.
With a smile on his face, and a nervous laugh,
He took the last cookie and broke it in half.
He offered her half, as he ate the other,
She snatched it from him and thought. . . oooh, brother.
This guy has some nerve and he’s also rude,
Why, he didn’t even show any gratitude!
She had never known when she had been so galled,
And sighed with relief when her flight was called.
She gathered her belongings and headed to the gate,
Refusing to look back at the thieving ingrate.
She boarded the plane, and sank in her seat,
Then she sought her book, which was almost complete.
As she reached in her baggage, she gasped with surprise,
There was her bag of cookies, in front of her eyes.
If mine are here, she moaned in despair,
The others were his, and he tried to share.
Too late to apologize, she realized with grief,
That she was the rude one, the ingrate, the thief.
Have you ever made a wrong assumption and said too much? Have you ever accused someone of doing something wrong, only to find out that you were the one at fault? The message of James in this third chapter is a continuation of his admonition in the first chapter which said, “My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” (James 1:19). James informs us of several important truths, but the first is this: The tongue is not easily controlled. He says, “All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and creatures of the sea are being tamed and have been tamed by man, but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison” (James 3:7-8). We have learned how to train all kinds of animals, from birds to killer whales, but we cannot tame the tongue. I went to Sea World and saw seals play ball and a whale jump out of the water and kiss its trainer. I saw a man who trained his dog to shoot pool, and another who taught his parrot to turn off the lights. That seems like it would be very difficult, but I know it can be done because I have seen it. But I have seen very few people who have been in control of their tongues. I have seen athletes train their bodies to do things which seem superhuman, but I have seen those same people unable to train their tongues.
It is just so tempting to share that bit of gossip we have just heard. People will be interested in what we have to say and think that we are in the know. We use our tongues share a secret that could damage someone’s life with the pretext that we wanted people to pray for this special need. We call people names as we drive in our cars because they make us angry. We curse and yell because life makes us angry. We curse at every little irritation. We put someone down in order to feel better about ourselves. We boast and make something sound a little better than it really was. James says, “Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts” (James 3:5). We tell something that is close to the truth, but not quite close enough to make it true. We slander someone that has offended us or that we don’t like thinking we are getting back at them. It is too good to resist. But James warns, “If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless” (James 1:26).
The second important truth that James informs us of is this: I allow God to control my tongue, or it controls me. "No man can tame the tongue," but God can, and must. This is beyond you. Like Isaiah, we need God to touch our lips with a coal from the altar. The Bible says, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen” (Ephesians 4:29). We are to build up, not tear down. Someone has said that the reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail more than his tongue. Calvin Coolidge once said, “I have never been hurt by something I never said.”
James makes two important comparisons when he likens the tongue to the bit in a horse’s mouth and to the rudder on a ship. I have been on a horse and lost my grip on the reins, so I know what it is like to lose control of a powerful beast. The reins were not tied, and when I dropped them the horse had the freedom to run wherever he wanted, as fast as he wanted — as the reins blew in the wind. It was not a happy time. I understood that since I had lost control of the bit, I had lost control of the horse. The horse was now in charge.
Imagine being on a great Navy ship when something has gone wrong with the rudder in the middle of a storm. You could be on a great ship like the US Navy aircraft carrier USS Nimitz, which weighs 91,400 tons and is 1,092 feet long. It is nuclear powered with 280,000 horse power reactors driving the shafts. But in spite of the ship’s tremendous size and power, it would be helpless if the captain lost control of the rudder. The ship would be in control of the captain instead of the captain being in control of the ship. If you are not allowing God to control your tongue, your tongue is controlling you. It’s like being on a horse and losing control of the bit, or being on a ship with a broken rudder.
The third important truth that James informs us of is this: The tongue can be used for good or evil. James says, “With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be” (James 3:9-10). You come to church and sing praises to God, offer prayers, and then leave to cut people to pieces over Sunday lunch with other members of the church. Sometimes you are still in church when you are spreading the poison of gossip and dissension. You use Sunday School meetings to spread the poison of discord — and the fire spreads. You worship and then criticize how the worship was done. Can your heart be right when out of your mouth comes both praise and cursing?
The Bible says, “Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell” (James 3:5-6). We can praise God or curse others, but when we do both we are practicing the worst form of hypocrisy. We speak with a forked tongue. We thank God for our blessings with one breath and then complain about everything that is wrong with the next.
We do so much good when we praise each other and build each other up, and we do so much damage when we tear each other down. The Bible says, “Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing” (Proverbs 12:18). When we speak words of love and encouragement to each other they are healing. When we speak words of kindness and appreciation we speak the words of God. When we compliment other people we are doing the work of God. But when we speak evil we do the devil’s work. People’s reputations and lives have been shattered by someone who attacked with their tongue. Marriages have been ruined and careers have been destroyed — just by innuendo, half-truths and lies. It is the spark that sets a forest on fire. The Bible speaks of those whose, “throats are open graves; their tongues practice deceit. The poison of vipers is on their lips. Their mouths are full of cursing and bitterness” (Romans 3:13-14). We do not want to be like them. The Bible says, “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God” (Colossians 3:16).
It was the evening of October 8, 1871, and Mrs. O’Leary took a match and lit a small oil lantern. She walked to the barn to milk the cow, but the cow kicked the lantern. The fuel and flame kindled a bit of hay, and then it spread until the barn was engulfed in flames. The barn caught another building on fire, and the fire spread to another building until the fire actually jumped the river and caught the main part of Chicago on fire. It kept going until an area one mile wide and three miles long was burning. Only two buildings were left standing. Half of the city was gone. 17,500 buildings were destroyed. 300 people died and 125,000 were homeless. All because of a spark that lit a lantern, that lit some hay, that burned a barn, that destroyed a city. The destruction a tongue can cause is no less catastrophic when it is set on fire by hell itself.
The fourth important truth that James informs us of is: What I say is a reflection of who I am. Bruce Barton said, “For good or ill, your conversation is your advertisement. Every time you open your mouth you let people look into your mind.” James put it this way: “Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? My brothers, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water” (James 3:11-12). In our backyard there is a crabapple tree. I know that I am not going to be able to go out this summer and pick plums or apricots from that tree. I’m not even going to be able to pick apples. It is a crab from the root to the end of its branch, and nothing will change that. If you are a crab at heart, you can’t produce sweet apples. What you say is a product of who you are inside.
Jesus said, “But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these make a man ‘unclean.’ For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander. These are what make a man ‘unclean’” (Matthew 15:18-20). What you say is what you think. Your thoughts are a product of your heart. The way you talk is a measure of who you are. Are you a Christian? Are people able to tell by the way you speak? Are you full of bitterness, criticism and complaints? Do you speak slander and gossip? Do your words cause division or healing? Does your cursing betray a negative outlook on life and a lack of appreciation of what God has done for you? Do you practice deceit? Or are you full of grace and humor? Do your lips speak words that heal rather than harm? Do your words express joy, faith and optimism? Do you express love to those around you?
Jesus said, “For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him. But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned” (Matthew 12:34-37).
Rodney J. Buchanan
March 25, 2001
Mulberry Street United Methodist Church
Mt. Vernon, OH
www.MulberryUMC.org
Rod.Buchanan@MulberryUMC.org
QUESTIONS FOR DISCUSSION (Mar 25, 2001)
1. What can you learn about people by listening to them speak?
2. List some of the sins of the tongue.
3. Read James 1:19. How does this important principle work in controlling the tongue?
4. Read James 3:7-8. How can a person be so disciplined in some areas of his/her life and so uncontrolled in the things she/he says?
5. Read James 1:26. How does this verse make you feel? Do you have work to do here, or is it settled?
6. Read Ephesians 4:29. What are some practical ways we can build each other up?
7. In your own words, how is controlling the tongue like using a bit in a horse’s mouth, or using a rudder to guide a ship?
8. Read James 3:9-10. Why is this true of Christians?
9. Read James 3:5-6. What is the message here? How seriously do we take these verses?
10. Read Matthew 15:18-20. From where do the things we say come? Why is this important?
11. Read Matthew 12:33-37. Why should these words of Jesus sober us?
12. How is your tongue a gauge of spiritual vitality?
