1. HUMILITY
“Humility is beyond a shadow of a doubt the most significant element of forgiveness. It is directly opposed to pride. Where pride seeks selfish gain, humility seeks selfless gain. True humility is to esteem another more greatly than yourself.”
“To humble oneself before God in repentance is mandatory for all believers. Pride and self-exaltation have no place in your life for it is God who "maketh poor, and maketh rich: He bringeth low, and lifteth up." (1 Samuel 2:7 KJV)”
“God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble” (1 Peter 5:5), “therefore humble yourselves, not only one to another, but to the great God, whose judgments are coming upon the world, and must begin at the house of God; his hand is almighty, and can easily pull you down if you be proud, or exalt you if you be humble; and he will certainly do it, either in this life, if he sees it best for you, or at the day of general retribution.” (1 Peter 4:17)
“Humbling yourself before others is necessary. It is sad when we see dissension and grievances in the church. One who was slighted by another may make disparaging remarks in return; a misunderstanding may cause anger. These all have in common one significant theme: "They hurt my feelings!" "They made me angry!" “They can’t do that to me!"
“All of this is self-centeredness. Me, myself, and I can be our three worst enemies.”
“Becoming a Christian required that you had to accept the fact you were a sinner and to repent of your sin. By doing that, you were humbling or submitting yourself to God, acknowledging that you needed a Savior because you were incapable of saving yourself. Children know that they can’t care for themselves and that they need another to care and provide for them. Humility is the acknowledgment of that need.”
“When you acknowledge by your words and in your behavior that you really do need the help of others, you humble yourself “like little children." When teaching young church leaders how to grow in grace, Peter wrote, "Young men, in the same way, be submissive to those who are older. All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another because God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble." (1 Peter 5:5)”
“Each day when you get dressed, you make a conscious effort. In the same way, you must take deliberate action on a daily basis to clothe yourself "with humility toward one another.” By doing so you will learn obedience and submission.”
“If you humble yourself and repent of your foolish pride, you will find the ability to forgive the unforgivable. And when you do, you will find how easy it becomes to get through those terrible times of your life and experience the healing power of forgiveness.”
2. OBEDIENCE
“Obedience is often difficult and requires deep commitment. Webster defines the word as “following the commands or guidance of; to conform to or comply with.”
“Just so, becoming a Christian requires obedience. It is the key condition of your relationship with God. His Lordship demands obedience, and through obedience, you fulfill His commands and statutes. By accepting Him as Savior you are acknowledging that He is the Creator of the universe and your Creator; consequently, you must submit to Him as Lord.”
“For you to learn obedience, your life must first have been won over and been persuaded to live in truth. By your obedience to Jesus, you are made partakers of His salvation "and, once made perfect, he became the source of eternal salvation for all who obey him." (Hebrews 5:9) The bond of your union with Jesus is obedience through faith. You cannot be identified as a follower of His unless you are obedient. “
“If we are going to "demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God,[we must] take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." (2 Corinthians 10:5) Obedience is an act of the will brought out by trust in His control and sovereign rule of our lives.”
“Obedience begins with the attitude of your heart. Jesus must be in every thought. As you surrender all aspects of your life and entrust them to Jesus, you will find that it becomes easier to obey His commands—not because you have to but because you want to. You learn obedience by recognizing and performing the role that God has given you, whether it be father, husband, priest of the home, wife, mother, helper, friend, employer, employee, and so on.”
“By allowing the Father access to our heart, exposing ourselves completely to His love and, in turn, His will, we allow Him to create a new heart in us. It is through our dying to self that we will be able to forgive as He has forgiven us.”
3. TRUST
“If you are having a difficult time obeying God’s commands, you are actually having difficulty trusting Him. Therefore, if you are lacking in trust, you will have a much harder time being obedient because you are not truly believing that what He asks of you is in your best interest. Because God has called you to forgive those who have wronged you or deeply hurt you, you know that you can obey this command because He is trustworthy.”
“Trust comes through obedience, and obedience brings trust. If I tell you to do something for the first time you may hesitate about doing it because you are afraid that it won’t work. But then, when you do it out of obedience and it does work, the next time I ask you to do something you haven’t done before, you will be much more likely to do it because I proved myself trustworthy. By being obedient to His commands you will grow in your trust of Him. When God says go to the person you have hurt and ask for forgiveness—or harder still, go to the person who has hurt you and seek reconciliation—you can do it because He has proven His ways are worthy of your trust.”
“When you worry about the future or how something might turn out or what might happen to you, you actually make yourself out to be a spiritual orphan. Yet God has promised that “when you go through deep waters and great troubles, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown! When you go through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you.” (Isaiah 43:2 NLT) “
“When you first became a Christian by putting your trust in the Lord, you accepted Him by faith. In professing Him as leader and forgiver, you became a believer by acknowledging Him as the Lord and Creator of the universe. You were saying “I believe, or trust, that through Your shed blood, forgiveness can, and will, penetrate every area of my life.”
“Worry, on the other hand, is practical atheism. By not trusting Him in every circumstance you tell the world that God doesn’t really exist!”
Trust is something that grows stronger based upon past experiences. Each of us must prove ourselves trustworthy to one another. We learn to trust others as they prove themselves trustworthy. This is a difficult and continuous task and something that is not easily done on a day-to-day basis. Trust in others will slowly grow until they do something that hurts us.
“Once you have been wronged, you lose some of that trust. Until that person proves him or herself trustworthy again, you will not be able to trust them as before. You will hesitate and experience great apprehension in reconciling your relationship for fear of being hurt again. That is why it’s imperative that you obey God’s command and ask those you have hurt for forgiveness, as well as forgive those who have hurt you.”
“Jesus is the only one in the universe who has, once and for all, completely and totally proven Himself trustworthy by shedding His blood and dying on the cross. He no longer needs to prove He is trustworthy, yet He does so on a moment-by-moment basis in every circumstance and situation in which you find yourself. Forgiveness must be based first and foremost upon your obedience to His commands because He has proven He is worthy of your trust.
Trusting in His commands will bring about the healing, restoration, and reconciliation needed in every relationship you have had or will ever have. By trusting your entire body, mind, soul, and spirit completely into His hands, you will experience His peace. Jesus has promised us that nothing can take you out of His hands. (See John 10:28-29)”
“You must learn to trust Him. The way you will learn, and the way you will grow in faith, is by "hearing the message . . . through the word of Christ." (Romans 10:17) Reading and studying the Bible, growing in fellowship with other believers, along with hearing the preaching and teaching of the Word, will increase your faith and trust. It is through trusting Him that you will be able to bring the message of God’s forgiveness and reconciliation to the world.”
4. CONFESSION
“Becoming a believer and experiencing the transforming power of God’s forgiveness in salvation requires you to confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead. The Bible tells us that "it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved." (Romans 10:10)”
“When you go before the Father to confess your sins, your failures and weaknesses, you are admitting that you are human and in need of forgiveness. True confession is painful, but when you do, "He is faithful and just and will forgive ‘your’ sins and purify ‘you’ from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:9)”
“Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and wonderful results.” (James 5:16 NLT)”
5. SPIRITUAL WARFARE
“If we are going to live a life flowing with forgiveness to everyone with whom we come in contact, we must realize that the battles we fight are spiritual and are not to be directed toward another human being. Rather, they should be directed against the forces of hell because our “struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” (Ephesians 6:12)”
“When we fight against another we are not fighting against the one who is at the root of our fighting. The church throughout history has wasted time and energy with doctrinal battles and church splits—fighting against people rather than the root cause. There are even “Christian” radio talk shows that are directed at pointing out the faults and inconsistencies of other people and the weaknesses of their ministry.”
“We can have the right doctrines and beliefs and still be wrong in how we "defend the faith." Fighting against one another will never help spread the message of the cross. It is only by living a life flowing in forgiveness that we will spread the message the world will be willing to hear.”
“If we spend our time fighting against the evil done by others we won’t be fighting the real enemy, the evil one—Satan—who is at the heart of all evil. Contrary to popular belief, Satan is alive and well. I spoke of him briefly in the chapter on humility. He is a real, personal being who, as a created cherub, sinned against God and subsequently fell from heaven.”
“As our true and only enemy, Satan lies in wait to find our weaknesses and then attack us. When we fight against another we give Satan the opening he needs to make ineffectual our testimony of the life-changing power of the cross. Satan’s main purpose is to blind “the minds of unbelievers so that they cannot see the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God.” (2 Corinthians 4:4)’
“Just as God created light to dispel darkness by saying “Let there be light” (Genesis 1:3), so God today must create spiritual light to “shine in our hearts” so that man may see “the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ.” (2 Corinthians 4:6) When our physical eyes are blinded, we cannot see the light of the sun. But when we come to Jesus, we walk in the light, because He is the Light. When people admit that they are spiritually blind, they will have taken the first step to finding truth.”
“If we are to conquer the forces of darkness we need to be "self-controlled and alert," because our "enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." (1 Peter 5:8) Satan is always testing us. He prowls around like a lion making a lot of noise and putting fear into the hearts of God’s people. But Satan is not a lion, he just makes noise like one. Jesus is the "Lion of the tribe of Judah." (Revelation 5:5) and has already triumphed over the works of Satan. Satan was defeated by the cross. The outcome of the war has already been determined, but the daily battles still need to be fought.”
“When we fight against another, when we don’t forgive, we give Satan a temporary victory. But in addition, we also give him a stronghold from which he will be able to attack us again. We are admonished to "Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings." (1 Peter 5:9)”
“Resisting the devil so that he will flee from us is, however, more than just saying "no." There is a condition that must first be met in order for the devil to flee from us. We must first "submit" ourselves to God. Then we will be able to "resist the devil" so that "he will flee from [us]." (James 4:7)”
“Submitting to God means to lay aside our own personal agendas and aspirations so that we will do His will. By submitting, we are in essence surrendering all to Him. We are saying, "You know what is best for me," and, "Not my will, but Yours be done."
“It doesn’t matter what someone does to us or why something happened to us. What matters is how we respond to it. Even in those times of suffering we "should commit" ourselves to our "faithful Creator and continue to do good." (1 Peter 4:17-19)
“We will never be able to “resist the devil” and have complete victory unless we surrender ourselves totally and completely to the will of God. Satan finds much pleasure when we don’t forgive and when there is no reconciliation with those who have hurt us or whom we have hurt.”
“Jesus came for two purposes. The first was to reconcile man to God. When we are involved in the ministry of reconciliation, we are doing that which pleases the Father and displeases Satan. The second reason was to destroy the "devil’s work." (1 John 3:8) The good news is that we have a Savior, the Creator of the universe, living inside us and His power has already defeated Satan!”
“Only after submitting to God will we be able to resist the devil so that he will flee from us. If we are not submitted and obedient to the Lordship of Jesus in our life, and we attempt to resist and rebuke Satan, the only response we will get is the sound of Satan’s laughter echoing through the halls of hell.”
“The real spiritual battle of forgiveness goes on in our mind and in our thoughts. Our warfare must be targeted not at breaking people but spiritual strongholds. Anger, bitterness, hate, and unforgiveness all originate in the mind. We must pray fervently to break these strongholds in our own life as well as in the lives of others. We must never give up; rather, we should be confident that we have been promised the victory already as we walk humbly, yielded to the Lord.”
6. PRAYER
“Prayer should actually be the first step taken on this journey. I left it for last so that it could help bring home the truth that it must become your first step. In order to accomplish the divine command to forgive one another, you must first learn to live your life in prayer and intercession as Jesus commanded:
“Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you that you may be sons of your Father in heaven.” (Matthew 5:44)
“Forgiveness will flow freely to a cold world only from a heart that is warmed by God’s love. Praying for those who have hurt you proves that you are a child of God and that God’s love is in you. When you pray for others, you become a conduit of God’s love. His love flows through you to those for whom you are praying.”
“Prayer is the dynamic that gives you the ability to do those things you know you cannot do on your own. It is a spiritual umbilical cord to your heavenly Father! It is an act of worship, the communion of your soul with God. It is your spirit working with the Holy Spirit to make changes and fine-tune those changes so that you might "grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ." (2 Peter 3:18)”
“Prayer is a personal experience, not a philosophy or a theology. It is to be your transcendent venture of faith and your steadfast response to the hand of God in your life—the only way to adjust to God’s plans for you.”
“Because prayer is communion with God, there are no "unanswered" prayers. The fact that you, as the created, have communion with the Creator is in itself an answer. When most people speak of unanswered prayer, they tend to think only of those things they asked for and did not receive. Not receiving something is just as much an answer as receiving it. Unfortunately, too many can’t accept "no" for an answer.”
“You may ask the Lord for things which He, according to His infinite wisdom, knows you should not have. Jesus taught, "How much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask him?" (Matthew 7:11)”
“Your heavenly Father not only knows what is best for you to receive but also what you should not receive. God always answers your prayers, not as you have specifically "directed" Him, but in ways that will most magnify His name and advance His kingdom.”
“When you submit and surrender yourself to God, you allow Him to work in your life however He desires. Then you are ready for a revelation of His will. To demand that you know before deciding to submit is to admit you don’t trust Him. Lack of trust will always hinder revelation. Revelation comes after you seek His Word for His will, not before.”
“Communication is the key to keeping any relationship vibrant and alive. Having an intimate relationship with God is why Jesus taught, "Ask and it will be given you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened." (Matthew 7:7-8)”
“These requirements for answered prayer are in the present tense in Greek. This means continuous action, so we must keep on asking, seeking, and knocking. The use of the three words “ask, seek, knock” indicates intensity. To "seek" is more determined than just to "ask" and to "knock" is still more determined. We ask for what we need. We seek what we earnestly desire. We knock when our desire becomes of great importance.”
“These orders carry with them an unmistakable promise that shows how God sees us. He has ordained some prayers to be answered at once, twice, or after a thousand times asking. It could also be through corporate prayer or as a direct result of our own actions.”
“When we pray for the strength and ability to forgive the unforgivable, we must never stop asking, seeking, and knocking until we know we can forgive as we have been forgiven.”
Peter wrote, “The end of all things is near. Therefore be clear-minded and self-controlled so that you can pray. Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” (1 Peter 4:7-8)”
