A Peanuts cartoon shows Lucy standing with her arms folded and a stern expression on her face. Charlie Brown pleads, "Lucy, you must be more loving. This world really needs love. You have to let yourself love to make this world a better place." Lucy angrily whirls around and knocks Charlie Brown to the ground. She screams at him, "Look, Blockhead, the world I love. It’s people I can’t stand." Well, I guess I am a little better than Lucy. I love people, it is just certain individuals that I have a hard time with. Friends, in all seriousness, I suspect many of us have found that it is easier to talk about love, easier to believe in love, easier to be committed to love, than it is to actually do it.
This is very obvious in the church. As Christians we know 1 John 4:11 tells us that "since God so loved us, we ought also to love one another." This morning we celebrate the magnificent love God has shown us in Jesus Christ. Most of us are in total agreement that expressing love to our fellow Christians is part of the right response to that love. Yet, it is not always easy to do, and it doesn’t always happen. We sometimes pay a high price, a very high price, when we don’t love each other as we should. There seems to be an epidemic of church conflicts these days. I hear reports of huge fights occurring in other churches and see some little ones in our midst. These things can be very destructive. I know people whose wounds from these battles have not healed even after many years. Frankly, I believe the key ingredient in preventing these problems is love. A couple of weeks ago a pastor friend of mine said, "Dan, there is a lot that goes on in the church that has no connection with love." I’m afraid that’s true sometimes. Love is not only the key ingredient, but sometimes the missing ingredient in the church.
But what exactly do we mean by this little word "love"? That is one thing we will talk about today. Our text, as we continue our journey through 1 Corinthians, is Chapter 13 -- "The Love Chapter." Though this passage is most frequently used at weddings, God has much to say in these verses about how we are to live each and every day. Let’s pray that we would be able to hear as the Lord speaks to us through His Word.
Before we get started, I want to mention a couple of things which may help us in understanding this passage better. First, we need to consider the context of this chapter. When Paul wrote this under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, he was not thinking about weddings or romance of any type. He brings up the topic of love in the context of the arguments the Christians at Corinth were having about spiritual gifts. The Corinthian church was plagued by all sorts of disputes and divisions, and Paul is reminding them that love is the key ingredient in building spiritual health in their church and in their individual lives. It is a mistake to totally disconnect this chapter from its context and treat it as a piece of lofty romantic prose. It is also a mistake to fail to see how Paul’s words in this passage transcend the situation at Corinth and miss how relevant they are for us today. We will try to walk in the middle of the path and avoid either of these ditches.
Another mistake that people make is to focus on the fact that Paul uses the Greek term "agape" instead of "phileo." Every time we see the word "love" in this passage, it is a translation of "agape." Often people say this word refers to God’s unconditional love while "phileo" is mere human, brotherly love. The problem is that the New Testament doesn’t make the distinction quite as clear. In John 5:20 we see the word "phileo" used to describe the love of God the Father for the Son. In 2 Timothy 4:10 Paul uses "agape" to describe the love that Demas had for the world when he turned away from the Lord. All this is simply to say that we need to allow Paul to define love for us in the context of this chapter. I think it will be clear that he is describing not primarily God’s love for us, but rather the type of love we should have for each other.
OK, let’s take a look at Paul’s message in this magnificent portion of Scripture. First of all, he begins by pointing out that love is indispensable. Without it, life is empty. 1 Corinthians 13:1 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. The reference here is to the gift of tongues mentioned in Chapter 12 which we will discuss more in a couple of weeks. No matter how wonderful someone thinks this ability is, Paul says that without love it is only noise. But tongues is not the only spiritual gift which is empty without love. 13:2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. In Chapter 14 Paul indicates that prophecy may be a more valuable gift than tongues, but without love it is worthless. Possessing gifts of knowledge and faith is certainly a wonderful thing. Imagine what it would be like if you knew everything, not just thought you knew everything but really did. And would it not be cool to have the type of faith that could move a mountain or even a hill without a bulldozer or any piece of equipment? But, Paul says any of those gifts mean nothing without love.
13:3 If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Here Paul goes beyond the boundaries of spiritual gifts to a couple of actions which are probably seen more selfless than any other. On the surface what he says may seem a bit puzzling. How could someone give away everything they had to the poor unless he loved those people? How could someone be willing to die a martyr’s death, suffer greatly for faith in Jesus, unless she really loved God? Paul, with keen insight into human nature, knows that is possible. Yes, people do indeed give to the poor out of love, but there are other reasons as well. Sometimes folks give to try to impress others. Sometimes they give to earn points with God. Sometimes people give because it is convenient to do so. If a guy comes up to me on the street and asks for money so he could buy some food, I would probably give him a few bucks, not necessarily because I felt any love toward him, but more likely because I did not want to be bothered by him. Paul says, however, that giving, even generous giving, which does not flow out of love is really very empty. Certainly many who have died because of their Christian faith had a deep love for God. But there have been those who chose death because they were trying to earn God’s favor, or trying to make up for things they had done in the past. Even acts of ultimate self-sacrifice which are not motivated by love are of little value.
So, love is essential. But what exactly is it? Paul provides a description, almost a definition, of love in the next verses, 4-7. 13:4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. The love that Paul describes is relevant in every context, but he certainly was thinking of the divisions that plagued the church in Corinth as he wrote. Be patient with and kind toward those who are on the other side. Those who lack certain charismatic gifts should not envy those who have them. Those who have gifts should not be boastful or proud. That is how a person who loves will act. 13:5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Oh, there are some good things to remember in that verse. If we love people we give them the benefit of the doubt. If they do something that upsets us, rather than getting angry, we need to figure why they did what they did. Yes, there will be some people who say or do things that really do hurt. But, Paul says if we love those folks, we don’t keep track of that. Someone in our extended family recently confronted my mother with a three-page list of how he had been hurt by members of our family over the last 40 years. I am afraid he had been keeping a record of wrongs. Even if the offenses against us are real, we have no business keeping track of them. 13:6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. Not delighting in evil is important stuff. It is so easy to find pleasure in the misfortune of a friend or someone else we supposedly love. True love doesn’t do that. 13:7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. A loving person is not blind to the faults of others, but he or she never forgets that by God’s grace people can change. When we love people, we don’t give up on them.
The four verses we have just read are some of the most beautiful in the whole Bible. Even though they were written almost 2000 years ago, even though they were written by a man, a man who was not married, who was very analytical and hardly a romantic, they provide probably the best description of genuine love ever penned. I think people who read and believe these verses begin to understand what love involves.
3) Paul tells us that love is permanent. 13:8a Love never fails. That is a good summary right there. 13:8b-10 But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. Spiritual gifts are temporary and imperfect. In a few weeks we will talk about how temporary they are, but I think Paul is looking forward to the return of Jesus Christ and our life in His eternal kingdom. The next two verses seem to support that. 13:11,12 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. Paul then concludes with this statement: 13:13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. It is a beautiful verse though it is a bit difficult to know exactly what he means. I think he is saying that faith, hope and love are all eternal virtues. The faith and hope we exercise in heaven will certainly be different from what is required here, but I think God may still expect them from us. Love, however, is the greatest of all the virtues because it is tied so closely to the person of God Himself. God is love (1 John 4:8). We love Him, because He first loved us (1 John 4:19). And because of His love, we are able to love each other (1 John 4:11). Greater than any spiritual gift, greater than even faith and hope, is love. We need to make sure we understand Paul’s point. Because it is indispensable, because it is permanent, the type of love that Paul describes in this chapter should be desired and demonstrated by every Christian. Rather than worrying about what spiritual gifts I have; rather than being concerned about what position in the church I have; rather than focusing on attaining money or pleasure, I need to make sure that I am a person who loves. I need to make sure that I am treating others with the same type of love that God has shown me in Jesus Christ. That is what the 13th Chapter of 1 Corinthians is all about.
OK, what are the lessons God has for us today? I will mention four. There are many more, but these are important.
1) We need to love those who are close to us. We need to love our spouse, our children, our parents, our good friends, in the way described in verses 4-7. No, Paul was not focusing on the family relationship when he wrote these verses, but if we are not demonstrating love to those closest to us, how do we expect to do so in other relationships? Now, friends, I realize there are lots of families where love is in very short supply. Families can be even more dysfunctional than churches. If you listen for an afternoon to people calling in to Dr. Laura, that becomes obvious. But our responsibility, no matter how inconsiderate our spouse is; no matter how unreasonable our parents are; no matter how disrespectful our children are; no matter how selfish our friends are, our responsibility is to love these folks. We need to treat them as we would like to be treated. Our goal should be to love them in the same selfless way God has loved us. The Lord doesn’t want to hear us say, "I love people, it is those individuals closest to me that I can’t stand."
2) We need to love those who are different from us. By this I mean those who have a different color of skin, who have a different level of income, who have a lot more or a lot less education, or who are much younger or older than we are. I am talking about people who are not like us. It may be a little different with each of us, but I think you know who I mean. Sometimes I hear Christians say things like, "I don’t have anything against black people" or, "I don’t look down on those who have not gone to college" or, "I don’t dislike someone just because he is rich." Oh, it’s good not to have negative attitudes toward others, but it is not enough. The Lord expects us to love these folks. He wants us to especially love Christians who may happen to be different from us. It is foolish to pretend this is always an easy thing to do. Many of us have somehow developed negative attitudes toward certain types of people. We tend to gravitate toward those who have similar backgrounds, values and interests as our own. Often we try to befriend people who are like us. If someone is different and has, for example, a lot less or a lot more money than we do, then we tend to stay away from them. Now, we don’t have to be best friends with everyone. That is not a realistic goal. But we have to strive to love everyone, even if they are different from us.
Next Sunday evening, part of our offering will be going to the folks in the Baptist Church up at Nett Lake to help them construct a new building. Now, I don’t know about you, but I have to admit that I have not always had a lot of sympathy for Native American people. There are parts of their culture which I don’t understand and which trouble me. However, these are folks that I need to love. Those who are believers in Jesus are my brothers and sisters in Christ, and I’d better treat them that way.
3) We need to love those who disagree with us. Here I am especially thinking of those who have a different opinion than we do on politics, on an issue in the church, or on a theological point. I suppose this would also include those who cheer for a different football team than we do, but we won’t focus on that today. When someone disagrees with us over what we think is an important issue, many of us find our attitude toward that person turning kind of sour. We have a controversy in our denomination over open theism, the idea that God doesn’t know all of the future. There has been a lot of debate and discussion, and one of the results has been that some pastors who used to be very close friends, now hardly speak to each other. I think that is very sad. Now, this is an issue on which I have strong convictions and on which I have been pretty outspoken. I believe open theism is a serious theological error. But, as I read Bible passages like this, I am reminded that I still have to love those who disagree with me. They are my brothers and sisters in Christ. I need to show these folks patience and kindness. Just because someone is wrong doesn’t mean we are free to not love that person. Now, that doesn’t mean that we should not take a stand for the truth. And there may be some issues that are so important that division will be necessary. But as Francis Schaeffer used to say, "If division must come, if we must for whatever reason separate from a Christian brother or sister, there’d better be tears in our eyes." Christians with whom we disagree are never our enemies. They are still family members.
One of the things which has helped me is realizing that very few people agree with me on every issue. In fact, "very few people" really means - no one. I don’t believe everybody thinks like I do on every topic. Thus, if I decide I can’t be friends with people who disagree with me, I am going to be a very lonely person. So even if you don’t cheer for the Packers; even if you are voting for the wrong candidate for president; even if you are an Arminian instead of a Calvinist; even if you disagree with me about something that should be done in the church, if you are a believer in Jesus Christ, you are my Christian brother or sister, and I’d better work on loving you just as the Lord commands. And, friends, you need to work on doing the same with those who disagree with you.
4) We need to love those who irritate us. These may be people who intentionally try to get us mad, or it may be someone who does something that we think is stupid, or it may be someone who just has a personality that bugs us. Do you know someone like that? Well, guess what? The Lord expects us to love those folks too. When there is someone in the church who rubs us the wrong way, we need to make a special effort to both change our attitude and to treat them in a loving manner. Some of you are thinking, "Yes, Pastor Dan, I know, but...but, he really hurt me when he said that" or, "..but, she won’t even talk to me." So what? Even if the other person has wronged us, we still need to love him/her. Yes, if they have sinned against us, we may need to confront them, but we still need to love them. I don’t know about you, friends, but I sometimes use the imperfections and sins of another person to try to excuse the lousy attitude I have toward that individual. I need to remember what Jesus said in John 8, "Let him who is without sin cast the first stone." If I were perfect, then maybe I could justify looking down on those who are not. But, since I am a sinner saved only by God’s grace in Jesus Christ, I don’t have any right to say anyone is unworthy of my love. And when it comes to other believers in Christ, it would be very good for me to remember that, according to1 Peter 4:8, love covers a multitude of sins. When a Christian brother or sister irritates us, fails us, or even wrongs us, we still need to continue to love them.
Friends, today I want to encourage all of us to let our experience of God’s love enable us to love others. I firmly believe that someone who is not a genuine Christian is incapable of consistently demonstrating the type of love we have talked about today. They can do it sometimes, but not consistently. Friends, if that is the boat you are in, I encourage you to turn to Jesus Christ, acknowledge your inability to love as you ought, and then experience His grace, forgiveness and love. That love will be a reservoir which will flow out of your life, enabling you to love others. Remember a Christian is not someone who just goes to church, has been baptized or tries to be a good person. A Christian is someone who is trusting in Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord. If you have never done that, I encourage you to do so today.
Now, I have a feeling there are lots of you thinking, "Pastor Dan, I am a Christian, but I know I don’t love others the way I should." The first thing I encourage you to do is to make sure you are truly a Christian. 1 John 4:20 says that someone who claims to love God but hates his brother is a liar. If you realize you have hatred toward other Christians, you need to do a careful examination of your soul because there is a problem there. If you know you are a Christian, however, but still have problems loving as you should, then I guess...well, you are like me. Let me close with some things we need to do. 1) Whenever we are aware that we are not loving as we should, we need to confess that sin to the Lord. Don’t make excuses for lousy, unloving attitudes. Confess them to God. 2) Focus often on the love of God for you in Jesus Christ. Read portions of Scripture about God’s love. Sing or listen to hymns and songs which speak of how God has shown us grace and mercy. Live every day with the knowledge that even if no one else cares about you, God loves you. Allow that love to be, as I said, the reservoir which enables you to love others. 3) Identify someone that is hard for you to love. Pray and ask God to help you change your attitude. 4) Even when you have a bad attitude toward someone, treat them in a loving way. That is not really love, but often our feelings follow our actions. Doing the loving thing is a good place to start. So, if God provides the opportunity for you to act in a loving way to someone, make sure you do it.
Friends, loving in the way that God has described in 1 Corinthians 13 is not an easy thing to do. A lot of times we can get burned if we try to love. But it is an essential ingredient for our own spiritual health and an essential ingredient for the health of this church. May God help us to grow in love.
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