EPH. 5:22-24 "HOW THE WIFE SHOULD TREAT HER HUSBAND"
* Last week, "How The Husband Should Treat His Wife!" * He should love her above everything
and anything in the world, * He should praise her and not criticize her,
* He should pay attention to her & let her know she is special!
* And, he should provide her a strong spiritual leader!
A) First, let us understand God’s design of marriage! * Gen 2:18-25 is the first marriage.
* God planned woman’s creation! * The plan for woman’s creation was not just an afterthought!
* It was not an inferior plan, it was not of less importance, and it was not given less attention and
thought than the creation of man!
B) On the contrary, the very opposite was true! * This passage shows that great attention and
thought were given to the creation of woman!
* The plan for woman’s creation was worked out in great detail!
C) First, She Was Created For Companionship! * Gen. 2:18 "And the Lord God said ......."
* God made Eve as a "help meet." * That is, a suitable helper and companion.
* Woman was the only thing God made not out of dirt! * She was special! * C.H. Spurgeon said:
D) "Woman was not taken out of man’s head to be lord over him, or from his feet to be trampled on
by him, but from his side to be equal with him,
* From under his arm to be protected by him, and from near his heart to be loved by him!"
* Companion: one who shares in what another is doing! * Man needs woman!
E) Second, She Was Created For Love! * Last week we talked about 3 kinds of love:
* Phileo ... friendship, Eros ... Sex, Agape ... Genuine love, the very love of God Himself.
* I don’t want a wife to love me more than she loves God!
* Now, let me share with you this morning "How A Wife Should Treat Her Husband!"
(1) THE WIFE SHOULD REVERENCE OR RESPECT HER HUSBAND!
* Eph. 5 makes it very clear that men have a need for respect or reverence and the women have
a need for love! * Eph. 5:33 "Nevertheless, let every one of you in particular so love ......."
A) The amplified Bible says about this verse, "Let the wife see that she respects and reverences
her husband, that she notices him, honors him, prefers him, and esteems him exceedingly."
* If she respects him as she should, she shows him her love!
B) The Man Has Two Major Responsibilities! * Lover and Leader!
* The wife should tell her husband, "I believe in you, I thank you for loving me and the children
the way you do!" * Husbands, we got to earn that kind of reverence & respect!
C) In Gen.3:16, God establishes the man as the leader! * "Unto the woman he said, I will ......."
* He didn’t do it to put the woman down, but God knew if there was not a final authority, there
would be confusion! * Someone had to make a final decision!
D) The Man Is Not To Dominate Or Lord Over The Wife! * Let me explain something!
* Submission is not slavery, it is simply conforming to God’s order!
* Husbands are to give leadership and leadership without love is dictatorship!
E) Leadership does not mean the man is superior and the wife inferior!
* Leadership does not mean that the husbands make all the decisions!
* Leadership does not mean that the husband is always right & the wife should look to him instead
of God! * Leadership is not something that should be demanded!
* Leadership is responsible to God for his home, responsible for all decisions, even if he turns
it over to his wife!
F) Even if a man is successful in business in his leadership & does not feel he is the leader of the
home, he feels like a failure!
* A wife should praise her husband for being a good leader!
G) When a man feels he is the leader, he will stop resenting his wife & fighting her and this will
free him to be more considerate of her and of her needs!
* He will become more supportive of her & then she will blossom as a person!
* Let me give you some ways that wives can challenge their husband’s leadership:
FIRST: BELITTLE HIM, CRITICIZE HIM! * To indicate that you don’t believe in him!
* "When are you going to grow up, you dummy, you can’t do anything!"
SECOND: DOMINATE YOUR HUSBAND! * Especially the quiet type! (motorcycle woman)
THIRD: PUNISH YOUR HUSBAND WHEN YOU DON’T GET YOUR OWN WAY!
* Pouting, silent treatment, cut them off from sex!
FOURTH: IGNORE WHAT THEY ASK YOU TO DO! * Their words mean nothing!
* Being on time for engagements! * Man is conquer oriented! * Man is from A - B!
* Me and Libby coming back from the beach one time - South of The Border
* Now, let me give you some ways to encourage your husband:
FIRST: FOLLOW HIS LEADERSHIP! * Need to be leadable, you enjoy following him!
* You say, "Lead me, I’m just dying to follow you!"
SECOND: HAVE CONFIDENCE IN THEM! * Find ways to build up their self esteem!
* And to let them know that you believe in them! * Need to express confidence in their ability
and in their decisions,(ask him 1st) & need to admire them! * Admiration is respect verbalized!
* "It is awesome to be married to you!" * "You are my man!"
THIRD: LET YOUR HUSBAND MAKE MAJOR DECISIONS!
* You can give advice, but you need to trust him with the final decision!
FOURTH: GIVE ROOM FOR FREEDOM TO FAIL! * We all make mistakes!
* And when a wife holds past mistakes over his head, he’ll be fearful of making future decisions!
* They need to know they can fail and still have our respect!
FIFTH: HAVE GOOD COMMUNICATION! * Let him know what your needs are!
* Be careful of the idea of not telling him your needs & expecting him to know!
(2) ENCOURAGE HIM TO BE A PROVIDER! * 1 Tim. 5:8 "But if any provide not for ......."
* God doesn’t smile on laziness! * A wife needs to be financially secure.
A) Husbands have a lot of pressure at work & does not need pressure at home!
* Some men can’t work & need special love and attention!
* But when a man comes home, the last thing he needs & wants is pressure from his wife!
B) If he comes home to a wife who is tense and upset with a long list of complaints and things
for him to do, where he is to go and relax and unwind?
* Wives need to understand the pressure of the husband!
C) You Need To Appreciate Their Hard Work! * Some work hard to show their love!
D) Encourage Their Ambition! * Don’t hold them back, and yet, don’t let them be lazy!
E) Be Content With What They Make! * Phil. 4:11 "... I have learned, in whatever state ......."
* Spend money wisely and you will learn how to be content!
F) Let Him Know You Need Him! * Don’t ever tell him, "I can get along without you!"
G) Enjoy Them Home, A Place Where He Loves To Be!
* Make home enjoyable for him so that he can’t wait to get home to you from work!
(3) ENCOURAGE HIM AS A PROTECTOR! * The wife should never worry about anything!
* The husband should protect physically, emotionally, and spiritually!
(4) QUALITY TIME TO BE ALONE WITH GOD BY HIMSELF!
* Your husband needs time alone with God, for he’s got a lot to talk to Him about!
* So don’t fuss at him if he stays in prayer a lot or reads his Bible a lot! * He needs that time!
CLOSE
A) So, this is how a wife should treat her husband!
* Reverence and respect him, encourage him to be a provider, encourage him as protector,
* And give him quality time alone with God by himself!
