EPH. 5:25-28 "HOW A HUSBAND SHOULD TREAT HIS WIFE"
A) Here in this chapter, Paul is comparing the church to the relationship of husband & wife.
* It’s interesting to compare the church to the first bride in the Bible, Eve.
B) She was taken from Adam’s side and Christ’s side was pierced for us on Calvary.
* She was formed when Adam was asleep, and when Christ was resting in death, the church was
begun! * Eve shared Adam’s nature, we share Christ’s nature - v.30-31
C) Eve was the object of Adam’s love & care & Christ loves the church & cares for her!
* Adam was willing to become a sinner because of his love for his wife and Christ was made
sin because of His love for the church!
D) Eve was formed & brought to Adam before sin entered the human family, and the church
was in the mind and heart of God before the foundation of the world!
* Let me share with you this morning, "How A Husband Should Treat His Wife:"
(1) HE SHOULD LOVE HIS WIFE ABOVE EVERYTHING & ANYTHING IN THE WORLD!
* The husband should love God FIRST, and then love his wife as the most important person in
the whole world! * Note v.25 and v.28
A) There are three essential kinds of love! * Phileo ... Friendship love, best friend, love to be
around them ....... * Eros ... A sensual & physical love, sexual love,
* Beware of this love, that it does not dominate genuine love!
* If she cannot render benevolent dues, you want nothing to do with her!
B) Agape ... This is the word used here in Eph.5! * This is the kind of love a husband is to have
for his wife! * This is the very love of God Himself!
* Agape love is a selfless and unselfish love, a giving and sacrificial love!
* A love that does not seek anything in return! * Instead of taking, it gives!
C) This love is the kind that loves even if the person doesn’t deserve to be loved!
* It loves even if the person is utterly unworthy of being loved!
* This is the kind of love that sends flowers, cards, etc. (Better than alimony)
D) Just imagine what would happen in most marriages if the husband so loved his wife;
* Loved her with a selfless and unselfish love, with a giving and sacrificial love,
* Loved her with a love of commitment as well as of affection!
E) One thing that would happen in most marriages would be this - the wife would melt in the
husband’s arms & willingly accept his authority as the head of the family!
* Please note that the standard of the husband’s love is the love of Christ for the church!
F) The love of Christ for the church can be described in one simple statement:
* Christ gave Himself for the church! * He loved the church so much that He gave Himself,
* He sacrificed Himself totally, gave all He was and had for it!
* And this is the love that the Word of God says husbands should have for their wives!
(2) HE SHOULD PRAISE HER AND NOT CRITICIZE HER!
* A husband should praise his wife everyday! * Start with an early morning kiss saying, "Honey,
I sure do love you, you are special to me!" (Psychiatrist)
A) In a company of friends say, "This is my wife, she’s the greatest."
* Thank her for the meals she fixes, for being such a good mother & for taking care of the kids,
"our children are so blessed to have a good mother like you!"
B) Tell her when she wants an opinion of her dress, "I don’t know if I like the dress the best, or
what’s in it better!" * Compliment her hairstyle!
* Tell her you wanna take her out tonight just to show her off * And many more ways to praise her!
C) Praise her for her housework! * You mess up what she does, eat her food, wrinkle sheets - bed!
* Pro. 31:30 "Favor is deceitful, & beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she ......."
D) Do not criticize her, especially in public or in front of the family!
* Watch what you say and how you say it - "Stop a clock - time stands still." * "28 inch waist"
* So, the husband should love his wife above everything & anything in the world,
* He should praise her and not criticize her, but there’s a third thing:
(3) HE SHOULD PAY ATTENTION TO HER AND LET HER KNOW SHE IS SPECIAL!
* A wife knows when her husband delights in her! * It makes a wife mad when she sees another
woman getting attention! * You should give your wife more attention than any other woman!
A) She knows when her husband’s job or hobbies means more to him than she does!
* A husband’s failure to give his wife attention or failure to give his wife first place is contrary to
the Bible! * 1 Cor.7:33 says that a man is to "please his wife!"
B) Once in a story I read ... The phone rang at 11:00 PM. * Across the line was the sobs of a
mother. * "I have to take $450.00 out of savings to buy your father a new TV."
* "Why, what happened?" * "He was watching it & I tried to talk to him & he wouldn’t listen, so
I took a hammer and busted the picture tube."
C) "Oh Mom, you could’ve been hurt!" * "I know, but I really wanted him to listen"
* "You know what your father did? He got up & didn’t say a word & went into the back room
and began watching that TV." * "He didn’t say a word, he just continued to ignore me!"
D) This example may seem to be an extreme, but many wives are very offended by their husband’s
lack of attentiveness! * When the wife begins to talk,
* It is like a mechanism goes off inside the husband’s brain that says, Now is the time to pick up
the newspaper, turn his eyes on something else or start trying to solve the latest problem at work!
E) He may show his inattentiveness by just giving a blank look!
* But when it is his turn to talk, he not only demands attention, but expects her to remember every
detail as if the entire conversation were permanently recorded in her mind!
* Give your wife attention just as you want her to pay attention to you!
* Eph. 5:26, the word "sanctify" means to "set apart for your attention."
F) When a husband is preoccupied with other people, possessions, or activities, his wife doubts
his love and becomes insecure!
* Wives will never be interested in you fame, wealth, or possessions until she has your attention!
* So, the husband should love his wife above everything & anything, he should praise her and not
criticize her, he should pay attention to her & let her know she is special, and last:
(4) HE SHOULD PROVIDE HER A STRONG SPIRITUAL LEADER!
* Here are some marks of leadership a wife will look for in her husband:
A) A desire to serve the Lord no matter what! * She wants one that wont give up easy! (Tiger)
* His convictions are based on the Bible! * She wants one that will stand for right & determination
to follow his convictions! (She wants a man, not a wimp)
B) His example of love and forgiveness no matter what!
* When a husband shows lack of interest in being a spiritual leader, his wife feels insecure and
unable to place her full confidence in him!
* She may then seek spiritual leadership from others!
CLOSE
A) Men, shall we say, "As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord!"
* Husbands. love your wives above everything and anything!
B) Praise her & don’t criticize her, * Pay attention to her & let her know she is special,
* Provide her a strong spiritual leader! * The woman was made from a rib removed from
beneath Adam’s arm, therefore the woman should be under the protection of the husband!
* This is how a husband should treat his wife! * Are you doing these things?
