"Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers." 1st Peter 3: 1-7
Introduction: A man named Steve Beck relates the following story: "Driving down a country road, I came to a very narrow bridge. In front of the bridge, a sign was posted: "YIELD." Seeing no oncoming cars, I continued across the bridge and to my destination. On my way back, I came to the same one-lane bridge, now from the other direction. To my surprise, I saw another YIELD sign posted. Curious, I thought, "I’m sure there was one posted on the other side." When I reached the other side of the bridge I looked back. Sure enough, yield signs had been placed at both ends of the bridge. Drivers from both directions were requested to give right of way. It was a reasonable and gracious way of preventing a head-on collision.
Beck concludes: "When the Bible commands Christians to "be subject to one another" (Ephesians 5:21) it is simply a reasonable and gracious command to let the other have the right of way and avoid interpersonal head-on collisions."
Transition: Marriages often endure frequent head on collisions! Relationships unravel, in other areas of our lives too. Why? Is there away to insulate our relationships from the onset of emotional pain? Consistently?
I believe there is away to have harmony in the home and in every relationship that is a part of our lives! Today in amessage titled " Getting a hold on Submission" we will discover that " Submission" is not a bad word or a term of derision, properly understood and applied it will add vitality to your life, and to those around you. Notice today the Goal, the beauty and the blessing of being submissive.
I. The Goal of Submission
"Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives"
When Peter writes to wives concerning "Submission" heâs using the Greek word hupotasso, it literally is a military term meaning to arrange in military fashion under the commander. It’s talking about being subject. The best translation would be, "Put yourselves in an attitude of submission" *John McArthur
Why submit? Peter declares that there is a redemptive purpose in choosing to place yourself in an " Attitude of Submission" "Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives." We all have heard the statement: " What you do speaks so loudly that I canât hear what you say" So it is with the husband and wife relationship. Peter wants us to grasp a truth thatâs often familiar and seldom fully realized. There is something dynamic and winsome about a life thatâs committed to the Lord! Such a life does not eliminate the need to give a verbal witness as to "the hope thatâs within you" in fact it compliments it!
As a third-century man was anticipating death, he penned these last words to a friend: "It’s a bad world, an incredibly bad world. But I have discovered in the midst of it a quiet and holy people who have learned a great secret. They have found a joy, which is a thousand times better than any pleasure of our sinful life. They are despised and persecuted, but they care not. They are masters of their souls. They have overcome the world. These people are the Christians--and I am one of them." Moody Bible Institute’s Today In The Word, June 1988, p. 18
Wives. Would you like to see your husband become one of them a follower of Christ? Then purpose in your relationship to voluntarily place yourself in submission to him. Submission doesn’t mean that you have no voice or opinion or standing.
To be equal to a man, you would have to come down from the pedestal that God has placed you on!
I have said it from this pulpit and will say it again. Women are superior to men! At being women! Men are superior to women at being men.
In the structure of the marriage relationship God has ordained, the man to take the lead if you will in the home. If the man is the C. E. O. then the wife is the president and be sure she has something to say and something worth hearing!
Men, your wife is the best barometer for keeping you focused and serving the Lord! Your not to rule over her, like some psychotic tyrant! Your to love her and support her and find in her the greatest friend and counselor in your life! She will help you immeasurably, and keep you from many dumb mistakes!
*About a year ago I decided I was going to be the next Chet Atkins. I went down to a local music store and bought a guitar! Thereâs nothing wrong with aspiring to play like Chet, but I didnât ask Laura. You see early on in our marriage (19 yrs this August) we enacted a safe guard. Neither of us spend more than $30.00 without letting the other person know. That courtesy has helped us both financially through the years. Back to the music store, caught up in the moment and all those shiny guitars I rationalized that "I am the man of the house" and I can do this! And I did. On the way home I thought about what I would say. It didn’t work! We had a major conversation, and I ended up taking that new guitar back to the store. Looking back, I must admit she was right. It wasnât that she didn’t want me to become the next Chet Atkins; she realized that learning to play the guitar is hard! She rationalized that I could learn on a less expensive one, then move up. Ironically one of our members soon loaned me a guitar, I practiced about 10 minutes and concluded this is too hard!
The Goal of Submission, is redemptive your life can and will inspire your husband in the Lord! And men we can learn so much from our wives their council is valuable! And it will keep us from bad decisions. Peter teaches the goal of submission there is also a beauty in submission:
II. The beauty of submission: "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful."
An ad appeared in a newspaper that read: "Farmer wants to marry woman, 35, with tractor. Send picture of tractor." Ladies wouldnât you love to respond to that add!
And while beauty has its place. Peter instructs us about what makes a woman really beautiful. "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight"
Someone once asked a pastor if it was a sin for women to wear makeup? He replied itâs a sin for some women not to wear makeup! Ladies you must be thinking, to bad some men can’t wear makeup! Is it wrong to dress well? Is it wrong to take care of yourself? Of course not!
When Peter writes: "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes" you may wonder what is he getting at? The NIV study Bible commentary on this verse is helpful: "Christian women should not rely on extreme coiffures and gaudy exhibits of jewelry for beauty." * " The Christian women of Peter’s day were relating to a society which was notably irreligious. Such adornment would suggest to all observers that the (Christian) women were apart of that irreligious society. As a result it would not impress the observer with the womenâs true inner character. *Ray Summers Broadman Bible commentary pg 160.
When Peter writes of Fine clothes, he is referring to expensive clothes. His point being that clothes do not make the woman! "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight"
Notice what a well dressed woman in God’s eyes looks like: your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight" What is it that makes for a beautiful woman? It is a woman who has inner spiritual character. A beautiful woman in the eyes of God has a gentle and quiet spirit. "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight"
The idea of "gentle" suggests one who is humble, considerate unassuming. Quiet is the word for silence in contrast to being boisterous. Peter is teaching that a unbelieving husband might more readily be won by a gentle and quiet spirit than by an argumentative one! *Ray Summers Broadman Bible commentary pg 160.
We see in 1st Peter chapter 3 the goal of being submissive:
"Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. We have learned that there is a beauty in being submissive: Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearingof gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. Notice the blessing of being submissive:
III. The blessing of being submissive: "For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers."
Real beauty as God sees it is not fleeting! It endures. Centuries roll on and on our time on this earth some would suggest would be forgotten in the sands of time. There wrong! Sarah the wife of Abraham is remembered as all of her daughters will be (those who sought and seek God above every priority of life) they will be remembered for shaping families and nurturing children, for making a home a home and not simply a place to eat and sleep! There is a blessing in submission, as God explains it in 1st Peter 3:1-7. Husbands have a responsibility to be the kind of man that makes living in harmony possible!
Men when you dont you not only make living with you intolerable, you limit God! Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers."
Simply stated: A wrong attitude of a husband toward his wife undercuts their prayer life! How can you hope to be the spiritual leader in your home, and find Gods favor when you fail to adore, love, care for and support Godâs special gift to you....your wife?
"Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers." 1st Peter 3: 1-7
Appeal: 1. To be submissive (willingly)
2.To be truly beautiful: Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.
3. Husbands determine to: be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.
