OPENING ILLUSTRATION: Edmund Hilary the first man who conquered Mount Everest was asked by an interviewer about his passions for climbing mountains. He gave this reply: "It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves."
Peter the Great of Russia is quoted as saying, "I have been able to conquer an empire, but I have not been able to conquer myself."
Hugo Grotius, the Dutch Jurist and scholar said, "A man cannot govern a nation if he cannot govern a city, he cannot govern a city if he cannot govern himself, and he cannot govern himself unless his passions are subject to reason."
King Solomon says, "Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control". (Proverbs 25:28)
INTRODUCTION: In a world where immediate gratification is often the norm, the biblical virtue of self-control seems like it belongs to a bygone era. However, as followers of Christ, we are called not to conform to the world but to be transformed by the renewing of our minds (Romans 12:2). In a time when the pace of life is ever-accelerating, and our senses are constantly bombarded with stimuli urging instant action and reaction, the Biblical virtue of self-control remains as pertinent as ever. We are called to navigate a world of endless opportunities and choices, where discerning the will of God requires a steadfast discipline of heart and mind.
Self-control, as one of the fruits of the Spirit listed by Paul in Galatians 5:22-23, "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law" is a direct manifestation of a life led by the Spirit. It is about having mastery over our desires, impulses, and inclinations that do not align with God’s will. Self-control is not about simply restraining ourselves; it is about living in submission to the Spirit and allowing God to direct our passions and choices. Through self-control, we are called to rule over our own spirits and resist the pull of sinful desires. In a broader sense, self-control underpins our ability to live out all other aspects of the fruit of the Spirit, making it foundational to our Christian character.
WHY SELF-CONTROL?
The need for self-control is as old as humanity itself. From the moment Adam and Eve chose to eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, the battle between flesh and spirit began (Genesis 3). As Proverbs 25:28 puts it succinctly, "Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control." Solomon illustrated the vulnerability of a life lived without this discipline. Self-control protects us, keeping our desires and impulses in check so that we can make godly decisions.
Jesus Himself modeled self-control in the wilderness, resisting Satan's temptations not through sheer will, but through obedience to God's Word (Matthew 4:1-11). He shows us that self-control is not merely the suppression of desires, but the aligning of them with God's commands and promises.
Let us dive into the Word of God to understand why self-control matters, how God is building this virtue in us, and how we can apply it in today’s context.
WHY DOES GOD BUILD SELF-CONTROL IN US?
1. TO REFLECT HIS HOLINESS
God is holy, and He calls His children to live holy lives. Self-control is the discipline needed to follow His commands and avoid sin. Scripture reminds us in 1 Peter 1:16, "Be holy, because I am holy." This holiness demands that we surrender our desires and align them with God's righteousness.
For example, Joseph demonstrated extraordinary self-control when he resisted Potiphar’s wife (Genesis 39:7-12). Even though he was in a position of power and temptation was readily available, Joseph chose obedience to God above personal gratification. Today, we face temptations of all kinds—sexual immorality, greed, pride—but self-control enables us to remain steadfast as a witness to God's holiness in our lives.
2. TO FULFILL HIS PURPOSE
God equips us with self-control so that we can fulfill the purposes He has for us. The Apostle Paul exemplifies this beautifully. In 1 Corinthians 9:25-27, Paul compares our spiritual journey to being an athlete in training: "Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable one." Self-control allows us to persevere and focus on living for Christ rather than being distracted by temporary desires or worldly pursuits.
In today's context, this might mean resisting the urge to chase status, wealth, or shallow success, and instead prioritizing faithfulness to God's calling. How much more effective are we in ministry when we surrender to His discipline rather than our own fleeting ambitions?
3. TO STRENGTHEN OUR RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM
Without self-control, we can become enslaved to unhealthy habits, which pull us farther from God's presence. Proverbs 25:28 warns, “A man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls.” This image reminds us that self-control fortifies our spiritual lives, creating barriers against sin and fostering intimacy with God.
In modern life, this is especially evident in areas like technology and entertainment. Endless scrolling on social media, binge-watching, or overspending can dull our sensitivity to the Holy Spirit. But self-control allows us to redeem our time, guard our hearts, and prioritize what matters most: communion with the Father.
THE ROLE OF THE HOLY SPIRIT IN BUILDING SELF-CONTROL
The beauty of self-control is that it is not something we develop on our own—it is a fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23). Left to our sinful nature, we cannot hope to exercise true self-control, but when the Holy Spirit dwells within us, He empowers us to resist temptation and pursue righteousness. The Holy Spirit is our Helper, the One who nurtures the growth of self-control in our character (John 14:26). He convicts us, guides us into all truth, and empowers us to overcome the temptations and excesses of the flesh.
Ezekiel 36:26-27 speaks of how God gives us a "new heart" and "puts His Spirit" within us, enabling us to follow His statutes. Through prayer, surrender, and consistent reliance on the Spirit, God gradually molds our hearts, aligning our ambitions and desires with His own.
AREAS TO FOCUS ON IN TODAY’S CONTEXT
In the modern world, there are critical areas where we must intentionally practice self-control to allow the Holy Spirit's work to flourish in us:
1. EMOTIONS AND ANGER (EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE):
With the fast-paced pressures of life, anger and frustration are common struggles. James 1:19-20 reminds us, "Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God." Through self-control, we learn to respond in grace, not out of impulsive emotion. This might mean exercising patience with coworkers, family members, or even strangers. Proverbs 16:32 notes that: "He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city." Our self-restraint can be a powerful witness to the transformative power of Christ in our lives.
2. SPEECH AND GOSSIP:
In today's world of constant communication, it is easy to speak carelessly or share gossip. Proverbs 13:3 says, "Whoever guards his mouth preserves his life; he who opens wide his lips comes to ruin." Practicing self-control in speech ensures that our words are a source of life, wisdom, and encouragement—not stumbling blocks to others.
3. TECHNOLOGY AND TIME MANAGEMENT (DIGITAL CONSUMPTION):
We live in a digital age where distractions abound. Ephesians 5:15-16 reminds us to "make the best use of the time, because the days are evil." In an age of constant digital connection, self-control is crucial in managing our screen time and the content we consume. This discipline ensures that our hearts and minds are focused on what is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable—excellent, or praiseworthy (Philippians 4:8) eventually glorifying God.
4. PHYSICAL DESIRES (LUST):
From unhealthy eating habits to sexual impurities, the enemy often tempts us through our physical desires. In 1 Thessalonians 4:3-4, Paul exhorts believers: "For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor." In an age of oversaturation, self-control liberates us to honor God with our bodies.
HOW TO CULTIVATE SELF-CONTROL?
1. SEEK GOD DAILY:
Our ability to exercise self-control flows from our communion with God. Jesus taught in John 15:5, "Apart from me, you can do nothing." Spending daily time in prayer, Scripture, and worship keeps us attuned to His power.
2. SURRENDER TO THE HOLY SPIRIT:
Self-control is not achieved through sheer willpower but through surrender. When you feel tempted, take a moment to pause and invite the Spirit to guide your next action. Romans 12:1 encourages us to offer ourselves as living sacrifices—daily surrender allows His Spirit to shape us.
3. ACCOUNTABILITY:
God places us in community for a reason. Sharing our struggles with trusted believers gives us the support we need to grow in areas where we lack discipline. Proverbs 27:17 reminds us, "Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another."
4. KEEP ETERNITY IN PERSPECTIVE:
As Paul taught in 2 Corinthians 4:17, our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory. Self-control becomes easier when we remind ourselves that the things of this world are fleeting, but God's rewards are eternal.
APPLICATION: While self-control is indeed a battle, it is also a part of the abundant life Christ promises. It frees us from slavery to sin and opens the door to true freedom in Him (Galatians 5:1). As Christians, we are called to reflect Christ in every area of our life. Self-control is not just a virtue; it is a testimony to the transformative power of the Holy Spirit. Let us allow God to shape us, discipline us, and use us for His glory.
Beloved, in a world that often prioritizes self-indulgence, may we stand as people who live disciplined lives—lives that point others to the One who gives us victory over sin and strength in our weakness. Let us walk in step with the Spirit, yielding ourselves to Him daily so that His power may be displayed in us.
