Have you noticed that Jesus holds two ideas in tension? He tells us to be childlike …and also warns us not to be childish. Only Jesus can say, “Become as little children” and “Grow up”…in the very same breath. He sees what we cannot. He can tell the difference.
Our passage today is Luke 7:31-35.
Jesus tells a very short parable. Just a few verses.
Yet it exposes an entire spiritual posture.
The context matters. Jesus is responding to critics. John the Baptist came preaching repentance in the wilderness. The religious leaders grumbled, “That guy must have a demon. He is too strict. Too intense. Too weird.” Then Jesus comes, and He heals and feasts and welcomes sinners. They complain, “He’s too relaxed! A glutton! A drunk!”
It is a strange thing.
Two very different prophets.
Same rejection.
When someone is determined to not listen, no one can satisfy them.
When someone wants an excuse, any excuse will do.
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There’s an old Arab tale about a farmer asked to borrow a rope.
The farmer replied, “I can’t lend you that rope. I’m using it to tie up my milk.”
The neighbor protested. “That makes no sense!”
The farmer smiled. “When you don’t want to do something, any excuse will do.”
That is the heart of Jesus’ story.
The Pharisees didn’t just disagree with Jesus. They moved the goalposts so no one could ever please them. John was too holy. Jesus was too joyful. They had a long list of what God couldn’t be like.
It always feels safe to make God small.
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I think about how kids act sometimes when playing hide-and-seek. My sons used to put their hands over their eyes and say, “Daddy, you can’t find me!” Because they couldn’t see me, they assumed I couldn’t see them. A few years older, and Eric would hide in the house and call out “WHO WHO! WHO WHO!” while giggling right under my feet. I’d pretend to search all over the house, but he wasn’t exactly subtle.
The Pharisees thought they were hiding. They thought their criticisms made them look wise. They didn’t realize their accusations were revealing their own hearts instead.
“He eats with sinners!” they said.
Yes He does. That wasn’t exposing Jesus. It was exposing their absence of love.
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There is a difference between being Christian and being religious.
A CEO friend once told me about a staff meeting. Someone complained, “Our workplace is becoming too Christian.” The CEO responded, “No such thing. Some people get too religious. But you can’t be too much like Jesus.”
The danger is to become so religious that we forget to become like Christ.
The Pharisees were not childlike.
They were childish. So Jesus paints them a picture:
“Imagine kids in the marketplace. Some want to play wedding— but the others refuse. So they say, ‘Fine, let’s play funeral’— and still, the others refuse. No matter what is offered, they just won’t join in. They fold their arms, pout, and say: ‘We’re not playing your game.’”
“Why be difficult…
when with a little more effort
you can be impossible?”
Jesus wasn’t attacking children. He was describing adults who refuse joy, refuse change, refuse grace. People who have already decided, “I’m right” and then build their faith around that conclusion.
In Jesus’ words they look like “spoiled children who won’t dance when the flute plays and won’t mourn when the dirge is sung.” They refuse to respond to God no matter how He comes.
John played a funeral tune.
They didn’t like it.
Jesus played a wedding song.
They didn’t like it either.
There’s a phrase for that: Small religion.
Religion that must stay in control at all costs.
Religion that refuses joy.
Religion that pushes away any God it cannot manage.
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Let’s talk honestly. Childishness is not cute in adults. It looks like:
• The demand to always have my way
• Inability to celebrate when someone else is blessed
• Criticism as a shield against real change
• Complaining instead of repenting
• Protecting comfort more than people
Childlikeness is something else entirely:
• Trust
• Honesty
• Growth
• Gratitude
• Quick repentance
• Quick forgiveness
Childlikeness is humility learning to walk.
Childishness is pride refusing to learn.
Jesus isn’t asking us to lose innocence. He is calling us to restore it.
There’s a story I love about a little boy taken to New York City for the first time. The taxi doors open, he steps onto the sidewalk, and instantly the world is bigger than he expected. Engines growling, skyscrapers rising into the clouds, crowds rushing like a river behind him.
His father offers his hand.
The boy proudly says, “I walk by myself.”
But as the noise grows and the shadows stretch, his confidence shrinks. In less than thirty seconds, with a trembling voice, he says, “Daddy, I let you hold my hand now.”
He realized his independence wasn’t enough for the world he had stepped into.
Most of us start out thinking we can walk alone. We don’t want Jesus’ hand because that means surrender. Trust. Dependence. Vulnerability. But life gets noisy and complicated. We grow up…and somewhere along the way we discover we are still afraid.
Childishness pretends it doesn’t need help.
Childlikeness reaches for the Father’s hand.
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Why do we become childish?
Five reasons rise to the surface:
We’re tired.
When soul-fatigue sets in, patience leaks out. We live irritated, defensive, and thin-skinned.
We’re hungry.
Not for food…but meaning, belonging, direction. And unless our hunger is fed by Jesus, every other appetite makes us restless.
We’re spoiled.
Life gave us too many yeses and not enough noes. When our will is crossed, we crumble or lash out.
We’re stuck.
Arrested spiritual development. We stopped growing somewhere back there and never restarted.
We’re afraid of decay.
We fear vulnerability, so we regress. We choose the illusion of control instead of the freedom of trust.
Whatever the cause…Jesus knows.
He doesn’t shame us for it.
He invites us forward.
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Here’s the danger with childishness:
if we don’t let the gospel grow us up, faith becomes small.
Small religion plays it safe.
Small religion treats God as decoration.
Small religion tries to control the Kingdom rather than enter it.
Jesus said, “Wisdom is proved right by all her children.” Meaning:
If the teaching is truth…you will see a changed life.
If the faith is real…you won’t stay the same size inside.
Jesus is not impressed with people who just appear holy.
He delights in people who become whole.
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The apostle Paul gives us a picture of this journey.
1 Corinthians 13: “When I was a child, I talked like a child. I thought like a child. I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.”
Notice the order.
He didn’t say he made it all the way to maturity first.
He simply let go of what was holding him back.
Spiritual transformation is rarely instant.
It looks like a hundred small decisions to grow.
Paul is somewhere in the middle:
Not fully arrived…
But no longer willing to pretend immaturity is enough.
“Now we see dimly…but then we shall see face to face.”
There’s room to grow…and grace to grow into.
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You might be thinking:
“What if I’m both?
What if some days I trust like a child
and other days I pout like one?”
Welcome to the human family.
We all hold both in tension.
Here’s the difference:
Childishness insists on its own will.
Childlikeness places its hand in the Father’s.
When fear rises…take His hand again.
When pride toughens…take His hand again.
When criticism becomes a shield…take His hand again.
There is a maturity that looks like surrender.
A courage that looks like vulnerability.
A strength that looks like “Abba, carry me.”
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We don’t grow because we have figured life out.
We grow because Jesus takes our hand.
So maybe today is just a whisper:
“Lord, hold me. I don’t walk as well as I pretend.”
Let Him lead you away from the smallness of religion…
Into the wide-open wonder of the Kingdom.
Closing Prayer
Jesus…
We want to be like little children…
but not childish ones.
We are tired of pretending we are bigger inside than we are.
Reach into the tight places of our hearts
where fear still rules
where pride still resists
where excuses still hide us from grace.
Teach us to trust You again.
To listen.
To grow.
To take Your hand and walk with You.
Make us childlike enough to follow
and mature enough to stay.
Amen.
