Robert Swan Mueller, an American lawyer once remarked: "To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love. In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness." Matthew 18:21-22 reminds us: “Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.”
Forgiveness is the action or process of absolution, whether that be at the mercy of God, or from one human being to another. It is defined as a conscious resolution to relinquish negative feelings like anger, resentment, and bitterness towards someone who has wronged, without necessarily excusing their actions or reconciling with them. It's about freeing the mind from the grip of biases and finding solace.
If forgiveness is from the heart, it not only retains exclusive power, but has deeper connotations. It is the similar act of releasing indignation and bitterness, but may encompass a significant shift in perspective through the beauty of compassion and empathy. This ultimately leads to distinctive healing and freedom. It's a conscious decision to let go of past hurts or deeds and move forward, rather than a fleeting emotion or the simple act of forgetting. Forgiveness, in this sense, is a journey of the heart, a process of personal growth and transformation. Frequently, forgiveness will lead to idiosyncratic feelings of empathy and compassion for the perpetrator. Forgiveness, by itself, doesn't necessarily mean forgetting or excusing the sin or harm done, it is more about comprehension. The relationship between the heart and the mind is complex and not fully understood. While the mind is generally considered the seat of reason and logic, the heart plays a significant role in emotions, intuition, and even decision-making. Modern science suggests a two-way communication system, with the heart influencing the brain and vice versa.
God emphasizes forgiveness as a core aspect of faith in both the Bible and the Quran. In the Bible, Jesus teaches that forgiveness is crucial for receiving God's forgiveness, emphasizing a reciprocal relationship where believers are expected to forgive others as God forgives them. The Quran also highlights forgiveness as a divine attribute and a human duty, with Allah offering mercy and forgiveness to those who seek it while encouraging believers to mirror this mercy by forgiving others. Psalm 103:10-14 reminds us: “He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us. As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him. For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust.”
Forgiveness is crucial for personal well-being and healthy relationships. If one is unable to forgive others, how can he rightfully expect forgiveness for himself? It allows individuals to move past hurt and anger, fostering emotional amelioration and reducing stress. Forgiveness also promotes stronger relationships by rebuilding trust and facilitating reconciliation. Forgiveness can be a powerful act, both for the forgiver and the forgiven. While it might seem counterintuitive, choosing to forgive, especially when wronged, can demonstrate strength, resilience, and emotional intelligence. It can also be a catalyst for salve and repair, both in personal relationships and within oneself. Ultimately, it empowers individuals to take control of their emotions and live more fulfilling lives. The Bible relates several instances of forgiveness and its importance in life. The parable of the unforgiving servant is a classic example of some who are not prepared to forgive others. Matthew 18:23-35 reminds us: “Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents.
And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and payment to be made. So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.’ And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him the debt. But when that same servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii, and seizing him, he began to choke him, saying, ‘Pay what you owe.’ So his fellow servant fell down and pleaded with him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you.’ He refused and went and put him in prison until he should pay the debt. When his fellow servants saw what had taken place, they were greatly distressed, and they went and reported to their master all that had taken place. Then his master summoned him and said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. And should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you?’ And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt. So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.”
The heart is considered an extremely powerful organ. Apart from sustaining the essence of life, it's a muscle that works tirelessly to pump blood throughout the body, delivering oxygen and nutrients to cells and removing waste products. It's considered the hardest working muscle in the body and has the ability to beat over 3 billion times in a person's lifetime. In its capacity, it might be said to speak volumes. While the heart doesn't literally speak with words, it is often used as a metaphor for emotions and inner feelings. The heart is frequently associated with love, compassion, and empathy, and can be said to "speak" through actions, expressions, and intentions. This "heart language" can be a powerful form of communication, even without words. In its silence, it might be said to be a language of struggle, failure or pain. Stephen King, an American author, from his “My Pretty Pony” short story once remarked: “Grandpa, watching him closely seemed to read all this in the boy's brown eyes, to know all the words for all the things the boy could never have found a way to tell, things that could not escape him because his mouth could never articulate the language of his heart. And then Grandpa nodded, as if he wanted to confirm this very idea, and suddenly Clive was terrified that Grandpa would spoil everything by saying something soft and soothing and meaningless. "Sure," he would say, "I know all about it, Clivey- I was a boy once myself, you know." But he didn't.”
Forgiveness can be considered an outreach to others. It is the hand that is offered in times of darkness to bring new light and hope to the unfortunate perpetrators of wrongness and sin. The "hand of forgiveness" is a metaphorical expression. It doesn't refer to a physical object or specific ritual, but rather represents the act of mercy, or the power and process of forgiveness itself. It can be understood as the means by which one extends grace and clemency, releasing oneself or others from the burden of past hurts and offences. The outreach of God can come in differing forms. In Christianity, it refers to the various ways God extends his love, grace, and salvation to humanity. It encompasses both the act of reaching out to others with compassion and the spreading of the Gospel message. This involves actions like showing love and care to those in need, sharing one's faith, and inviting others to join the Christian community. Matthew 25:35-40 reminds us: For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.’ Then the righteous will answer him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?’ And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.”
Amen.
