HANDLING CRITICISM
By Rev. Samuel Arimoro
Main Text:
Proverbs 15:31-32 (NIV):
"Whoever heeds life-giving correction will be at home among the wise. Those who disregard discipline despise themselves, but the one who heeds correction gains understanding."
Supporting Texts: Matthew 5:11-12, 1 Peter 2:23, Proverbs 9:8, Galatians 6:1, James 1:19-20
INTRODUCTION:
Criticism is something that everyone faces at some point in their lives. It is a reality of living in a fallen world, where opinions are often shared freely, sometimes with little regard for how they may impact the individual receiving them. How we respond to criticism can either help us grow or cause us to stumble. Whether it is constructive criticism that helps us improve or destructive criticism that seeks to tear us down, handling it wisely is crucial to our spiritual growth.
In the Bible, we see many examples of individuals who faced criticism and how they responded to it. Jesus, the perfect example, endured the most severe criticism from His enemies yet handled it with grace, wisdom, and humility. As believers, we are called to follow His example and learn how to respond to criticism in a way that honors God and promotes peace.
This message today is a reminder that how we respond to criticism matters. It is not the criticism itself that defines us but the way we handle it. When we understand the purpose of criticism and the biblical principles for dealing with it, we can navigate through these challenging moments with wisdom and grace.
1. UNDERSTANDING CRITICISM
Before we can respond to criticism properly, we need to understand what it is and why it exists.
a) Criticism as a Tool for Growth
Constructive criticism can help us identify areas for improvement. It often comes from people who genuinely want us to succeed (Proverbs 27:17).
b) Criticism Can Be Misused
Not all criticism is intended to help. Some criticism is rooted in jealousy, hatred, or bitterness, and its purpose is to tear down rather than build up (Psalm 31:13).
c) Everyone Faces Criticism
No one is exempt from criticism. Even Jesus faced criticism, and He responded in a way that we can learn from (Matthew 5:11-12).
d) The Danger of Ignoring Criticism
Ignoring valid criticism can lead to personal and spiritual stagnation. The Bible urges us to embrace correction for growth (Proverbs 12:1).
Biblical Example: Jesus was harshly criticized by the Pharisees, but He responded with wisdom and truth, not defensiveness or anger (Matthew 23:1-39).
2. RESPONDING WITH HUMILITY
A humble heart is key when handling criticism, especially when it is difficult to hear.
a) Not Defending Yourself Too Quickly
Often, when criticized, our first instinct is to defend ourselves. However, sometimes it is better to pause and listen to what is being said before responding (James 1:19).
b) Acknowledging Mistakes
If the criticism is valid, humbly acknowledging our mistakes shows maturity and a willingness to grow (1 Peter 2:23).
c) Choosing Not to Be Offended
It is easy to be offended by criticism, but we must choose to respond with grace and not let our emotions control us (Proverbs 19:11).
d) Learning from Criticism
Even when criticism stings, there is often something to learn. A humble heart is willing to accept correction and grow from it (Proverbs 15:31-32).
Biblical Example: David received harsh criticism from his wife, Michal, when he danced before the Lord. Instead of reacting in anger, he responded with humility, explaining his joy before God (2 Samuel 6:16-23).
3. RESPONDING WITH WISDOM
Wisdom is required when dealing with criticism, especially when it is unjust or hurtful.
a) Assessing the Motive Behind the Criticism
Not all criticism is given with good intentions. It is important to discern whether the criticism is constructive or destructive (Proverbs 9:8).
b) Responding in Love
Even when criticism is harsh, we are called to respond in love, remembering that we represent Christ in all that we do (Galatians 6:1).
c) Knowing When to Speak and When to Stay Silent
Sometimes the best response to criticism is silence. Jesus remained silent when falsely accused before Pilate (Matthew 27:12-14).
d) Seeking Counsel When Needed
If the criticism is confusing or overwhelming, seeking wise counsel can help us process it appropriately (Proverbs 15:22).
Biblical Example: When Nehemiah faced criticism and mockery from his enemies, he responded wisely, continuing the work God had given him without getting distracted by the critics (Nehemiah 4:1-6).
4. LEARNING TO LET GO OF BITTERNESS
One of the biggest dangers in handling criticism is allowing bitterness to take root in our hearts.
a) Forgiving Those Who Criticize Unjustly
Holding on to grudges against those who criticize us can be harmful to our hearts and our relationship with God. We are called to forgive as Christ forgave us (Ephesians 4:31-32).
b) Not Holding on to Past Criticism
Sometimes, we carry the weight of past criticism, allowing it to shape our identity. We must release these hurts and move forward (Philippians 3:13-14).
c) Praying for Those Who Criticize Us
Jesus calls us to pray for those who criticize and persecute us, showing love and mercy even in the face of adversity (Matthew 5:44).
d) Choosing Peace Over Conflict
Rather than engaging in a war of words, choose peace, knowing that the Lord will fight your battles (Romans 12:18-19).
Biblical Example: Joseph’s brothers criticized him and sold him into slavery, but instead of seeking revenge, Joseph forgave them and chose to reconcile (Genesis 50:15-21).
5. GROWING THROUGH CRITICISM
Criticism can lead to growth if we handle it with the right attitude and a heart focused on God.
a) Using Criticism to Strengthen Your Character
Constructive criticism helps refine our character and helps us become more like Christ (Romans 5:3-5).
b) Improving Skills and Abilities
Valid criticism can highlight areas for improvement. Use it to enhance your skills, knowledge, and abilities for God’s glory (Proverbs 1:5).
c) Remaining Faithful in Difficult Times
Criticism often tests our faith. Through it, we learn to remain steadfast and trust in God’s plan for our lives (James 1:2-4).
d) Being a Model of Grace
When we handle criticism with grace and humility, we become a testimony to others of God’s work in our lives (Colossians 4:6).
Biblical Example: Paul faced intense criticism throughout his ministry, yet he persevered and continued to preach the gospel, showing how we too can grow through opposition (2 Corinthians 11:23-30).
CONCLUSION:
Criticism is an inevitable part of life, and how we respond to it will greatly impact our spiritual health and growth. As followers of Christ, we are called to handle criticism with humility, wisdom, and love. Whether the criticism is constructive or unjust, we can choose to learn from it, let go of bitterness, and grow into the people God has called us to be.
By responding to criticism with the mind of Christ, we become more like Him in our character and more effective in our service to others. Let us resolve today to face criticism not as a stumbling block but as an opportunity to reflect Christ’s love and grace.
PRAYER POINTS:
1. Lord, help me to respond to criticism with humility and not defensiveness.
2. I release every hurt from unjust criticism and choose forgiveness.
3. Father, grant me wisdom to discern the motives behind criticism.
4. Lord, help me to grow through criticism and become more like You in character.
5. I pray that I will be a reflection of Your love and grace, even in the face of criticism.
