Series: A Day in the Life Of…
Judas: A Disillusioned Disciple
I’m beginning a new series leading up to Easter. My intentions are to go back 2,000 years, using Scripture as our guide and history and logic. As helpful assistants I want to determine what life was like for some of the key players in the Easter account. Today I want us to look at a day in the life of Judas, the disciple who betrayed Jesus and sold Him out to the religious leaders.
All of us are disillusioned at times, aren’t we? Think of the cycle that can occur when you start a new job. It begins with a naïve enthusiasm, and it can quickly move to disgruntled disillusionment, and from there it may lead to nagging self-doubt. You may say to yourself, “Maybe it’s not the environment or the job—I guess it must be me!!”
People can become disillusioned in a marriage as well. Maybe you met the perfect woman, the perfect soul mate. You charmed her, you wooed her, and you won her heart. Now you're married to her, and the honeymoon’s over.
Or maybe you feel like the wife who said, "I knew I married Mr. Right, I just didn't know his first name was ALWAYS!"
Did you hear about the extremely, wealthy older fellow? He was about to tee off on the 1st hole at his country club, when a beautiful young woman walked over from the swimming pool, came up and gave him a kiss and said, “See you tonight.” then she walked off.
The rest of the foursome said, “Who was that?”
The guy said, “That’s my wife.”
They said, “How did you get her?”
The guy said, “I lied about my age.”
They said, “Did you say you were 57?”
He said, “No--I said I was 97!”
Disillusionment can take on many forms!
There are also people who are disillusioned with the church. They have a “Pollyanna” mindset that there will be no problems and that all is perfect in a spiritual place like the church. So when they see a member who has an overbearing spirit or a foul mouth it taints their view of the entire church.
Years ago when televangelist Jim Bakker was involved with a financial and moral scandal with his national ministry, it really shook up the supporters of the ministry. One older couple who had given quite freely to PTL was honest in their assessment, they said, “Perhaps if we had not put him on so high of a pedestal, he wouldn’t have had so far to have fallen.”
You may have thought that the preacher of the church would have the knowledge of Billy Graham, the servant hood of Mother Teresa and the boldness of the apostle Paul –but instead all you got, was…ME!
Disillusionment surfaces; which explains why some people move from job to job, or marriage to marriage or bounce in and out of church. But today I want to focus on a disciple who was disillusioned—in fact Judas’ disenchantment centered around the most important relationship of all—his relationship with Jesus Christ.
We’re going to look at five snapshots of his life and in so doing we’ll see a dangerous, downward spiral of disillusionment. Let’s look at each stage in hopes of avoiding that downward spiral.
The first stage is…
1) Disappointment
Remember the scene at the Last Supper? Jesus is still reaching out to Judas.
He’s disappointed with the Lord. The scriptures don’t tell us specifically why Judas was disillusioned and disappointed—but they do tell us enough information to draw some conclusions.
Judas’ disappointment came from unmet expectations. Jesus didn’t fulfill the wants or plan of Judas or for the other disciples at times.
In Judas’s eyes Jesus had the wrong agenda. Let’s face it; the disciples didn’t always have a spiritual agenda. James and John made a special request to be seated on Christ’s right and left when He came in to His kingdom. Ross Brodfuehrer says, “Each of these men had a not-so-secret desire for power. They associated with Jesus in part so they could rule with Him in the end. When it looked more like the option was to bleed beside Jesus rather than reign beside Him, their conviction faltered.”
Judas was disillusioned that Jesus wasn’t doing what he had hoped, namely leading a revolution to set up a military or political kingdom. And it seems that since Jesus didn’t measure up to what Judas’ view of the messiah should be, Judas made it his agenda to silence Jesus Christ.
Judas probably also felt that Jesus was with the wrong people.
From the perspective of this disillusioned disciple, if Jesus truly was the Messiah, instead of just spending some of His time with the influential and the political leaders, the movers and shakers, He would spend all of His time with them. And rather than ticking off the religious leaders and hanging out with the handicapped, the hurting and the peasants, Jesus would change His friendship circle.
Judas also believed that Jesus had the wrong stewardship. Do you remember in John 12 when Mary poured a jar of expensive perfume on the feet of Jesus that was worth a year’s salary? Judas objected and piously said, in John 12: 5 & 6, "Why wasn't this perfume sold and the money given to the poor? It was worth a year's wages. He didn’t say this because he cared about the poor but because he was a thief; as keeper of the money bag, he used to help himself to what was put into it.”
John gives us the complete story—it sounds so pious to say, “Give the money to the poor”. But he tells us that Judas didn’t care about the poor. He was just upset since as the trusted treasurer of Christ’s ministry he would dip into the pot for himself. Judas’ greed for money superseded his love for Christ. Perhaps embarrassed by Jesus rebuke of Judas’s sanctimonious plea for the poor, this became the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back. In his mind maybe Judas said, “Okay I’m not wasting my time with this “Messiah wanna be”, he’s not what I think he should be.”
Right after this look at what happens in Matthew 26: 14 – 16, “Then one of the Twelve--the one called Judas Iscariot--went to the chief priests 15 and asked, "What are you willing to give me if I hand him over to you?" So they counted out for him thirty silver coins. 16 From then on Judas watched for an opportunity to hand him over.”
Little did any of them realize that their evil act was the fulfillment of a prophecy written hundreds of years before where Zechariah 11:12 says that, “the Messiah would be betrayed for 30 pieces of silver.”
In Zechariah's day, the reference to silver would undoubtedly have been to the shekel which was the standard weight for paying a price. The shekel has a long use in purchasing property, going back to Abraham's time (Genesis 23:16). In New Testament times, the shekel was the value of about four drachmas (a Greek coin) or four denarii (a Roman coin). It would be in weight a little less than half an ounce of silver. It's value as currency would be the common wages for a laboring man for four days, or in today's value perhaps around $400 to $500.
The thirty pieces of silver, then, would be worth around $12,000 - $15,000 in today's economy.
And now, here at the Last Supper, most theologians believe that the text suggests that Judas had a seat of prominence right there next to Jesus. So when Jesus predicts His betrayal and others start asking out of fear, “Will it be me?” Judas has to follow suit in order to remain inconspicuous.
Matthew 26:25 says, “Then Judas, the one who would betray him, said, ‘Surely not I, Rabbi? Jesus answered, ‘Yes, it is you.’”
I picture Jesus almost saying that under His breath as He is face to face with the one who would turn Him in. At this stage Judas had to be disappointed and embarrassed by the whole situation…Jesus already knew what was about to happen and was still washing his feet and allowing him to participate in the institution of the very first communion service.
But all of that wasn’t enough to cause Judas to break out of the downward spiral of disillusionment, and so disappointment moves toward the second phase…
2) Disengagement
Here we look at the Meeting with the Chief Priests---the deal had already been struck, the price had been set. All that they needed was the right time and place-- away from the crowds. While the scriptures don’t tell us of Judas going back to the chief priests, he had to match up with them to lead them to Jesus and receive his payment.
Watch this scene from the Passion of Christ
SHOW VIDEO CLIP WITH AUDIO AND VIDEO (Scene #2) Stop video after Judas is asked, “Where is he?” and the scene transitions to the garden.
From there Judas probably took them to the upper room to seize Jesus. When He wasn’t there, knowing His prayer habits and His favorite spots Judas instinctively knew to check out the garden of Gethsemane in the Mount of Olives.
There’s a warning here for every Christian. When you begin to disengage from what you know to be right, you lower your standards and excuse your behavior. So you pad your expense account, Bible study gives way to exercise, you’re not as generous with your giving and slowly you just move away and disengage. You have your agenda and you want it your way, the way that seems best for you, and if that doesn’t happen “you’ll take your ball and go someplace else.”
Some friends of mine named Malcolm and Debbie sold their home last February, but they couldn’t move into the other house until April. But the nice couple that bought their place said that they were willing to rent it back to them for six weeks. At the closing, after all the paperwork was signed and the attorney informed them that the wire transfer was complete as Malcolm and Debbie were getting ready to leave Malcolm said to the new owner, “So I guess you’re my new landlord?” The guy smiled and said, “That’s right.”
Malcolm told me that he reached into a folder and pulled out a LONG list, and said, “There’s a lot of things that you need to get fixed…that place is falling apart!!”
(The man didn’t think it was as funny as you did.)
I find I have had lots of expectations. Like Judas, I can produce a pretty long wish list of what I think the Messiah should deliver on. Here’s the difference with Judas and the other disciples; while the others went through times of disillusionment and confusion, they stayed and drew closer to Christ, while Judas pulled away from Christ and the others and moved closer to the enemy.
Hebrews 2:1 says, “We must pay more careful attention, therefore, to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away.”
Disengagement is always the natural step behind disappointment. A freshman in college who never learned how to defend their faith while in high school goes away and gradually he disengages from Christian friends, their church and their relationship with Jesus Christ.
So when Jesus doesn’t fit Judas’ mold of a messiah he withdraws and does the same thing. Notice that Christians today try the same thing, if they become dissatisfied with the church or frustrated in their life. You move to a new town but instead of seeking out a church you stay home and take a hiatus from the spiritual.
Your spouse passes away and instead of pouring into service and friendships you isolate yourself. Or maybe you come to church but that’s it, you used to be actively involved but now you don’t volunteer and emotionally you take a couple of steps back and become a disengaged spectator rather than an active participant. You just “play church” and like Judas at the last supper you play along, you let Jesus wash your feet, you take communion –outwardly you just pretend but inwardly you are disengaging.
The next step in the downward spiral of disillusionment may be the most pivotal it is…
3) Decision
It’s decision time when Judas leads the soldiers to Jesus and he signifies which one is Jesus in the darkness with a kiss. He could have repented when Jesus prophesied of His betrayal. He could have gone to the chief priests and said, “Here’s your money back, I’ve changed my mind.” But that kiss of betrayal in my mind was the pivotal turning point, he had crossed the line and there was no turning back.
Matthew 26:47-50 says, 47 “While He was still speaking, Judas, one of the Twelve, arrived. With him was a large crowd armed with swords and clubs, sent from the chief priests and the elders of the people. 48 Now the betrayer had arranged a signal with them: "The one I kiss is the man; arrest him." 49 Going at once to Jesus, Judas said, "Greetings, Rabbi!" and kissed Him. 50 Jesus replied, "Friend, do what you came for." Then the men stepped forward, seized Jesus and arrested Him.”
The kiss is the first deed in a long line of physical torture that Christ would endure through the course of the next twenty hours.
And Jesus says, “Judas, you betray the son of man with a kiss?”
While this is decision time, don’t be confused--this decision is the result of a series of smaller decisions, which did not honor God. It was the crossing of the line. The Bible tells us that Satan had already entered Judas days before, but with this kiss, we see that Judas had allowed Satan to take up residency within him, and evil must have felt at home there.
It’s almost impossible to change the course of evil actions following his act of betrayal, tough to imagine slowing down the train after the kiss of betrayal. While it’s possible it’s not very likely.
So what’s the “kiss” for you? When have you crossed the line?
For the alcoholic it’s that moment when he pushes open the door to the liquor store.
For the co-workers enflamed with lust, it’s the statement, “Meet me at 7 tonight at the motel.”
The kiss for the violent may be that moment when they pull back their hand with anger in their eyes.
For the divisive it’s when they choose to speak up and say words of criticism and sarcasm rather than to hold their tongue.
For the addict it’s going to the secret stash in the house that you think no one knows about.
The truth is folks we’ve all sold out our savior at times, maybe not to the degree that Judas did, but in time—slowly—gradually we fade.
The poet said,
“Some men die by shrapnel, others go up in flames,
And some men perish inch by inch who play at little games.”
After the decision has been made and he’s followed through, Judas continues the downward spiral as this decision, that was supposed to bring relief and joy, turns out to be the wrong decision and so it leads to …
4) Despair
Judas returns the money. His conscience comes alive and he takes a baby step toward relieving his guilt.
There are those moments when even those who are evil recognize the error of their ways. That’s why you’ll hear that a man has turned himself in and confessed to murdering someone or that a person will try to come clean just so they have peace of mind. Why seeing Jesus was more than he could bear.
Matthew 27: 3 - 5a says, “When Judas, who had betrayed Him, saw that Jesus was condemned, he was seized with remorse and returned the thirty silver coins to the chief priests and the elders. 4 I have sinned,” he said, “for I have betrayed innocent blood.” “What is that to us?” they replied. “That’s your responsibility.” 5 So Judas threw the money into the temple and left...”
Did you see the phrase in verse 3? He was seized with remorse.
That’s a good first step but it’s not the only step.
John MacArthur writes, “His remorse was not the same as repentance, as subsequent events clearly show. He was sorry, not because he had sinned against Christ, but because his sin did not satisfy him the way he had hoped.”
That’s a perfect description of what happens when someone is disillusioned.
The money, which had been so important to Judas before, now didn’t matter.
In 2 Corinthians 7:10 Paul says, “Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death.”
If we belong to Christ, all of us by now have realized that sin doesn’t satisfy the way we had hoped. Sin always takes us further than we want to go and keeps us longer than we want to stay. That’s why Acts 17:30 tells us that God wills for all of us to come to repentance.
Now before we look at the final stage of full-blown disillusionment remember, Judas still could have changed. He could have gone back to the disciples or tried to get close to Christ himself. He could have made known to God and to others, I blew it and I want to undo this wrong so the Messiah will be saved.
You see the final step in the downward spiral of disillusionment is …
5) Destruction
We see this as Judas takes his own life, hanging himself in a place called the Potter’s field. One of the saddest statements in all of the Bible is Matthew 27:5 which says, “So Judas threw the money into the temple and left. Then he went away and hanged himself.”
Instead of pursuing forgiveness, he gave up. Instead of trying to straighten out his life, he ended his life.
Satan is so evil. He spent months getting Judas to betray Jesus and when he finally does, once the dye is cast Satan turns on Judas and makes him feel miserable for what he has done; so much so that he returns the money he had so desperately bargained for and he destroys himself. Satan specializes in destruction and he always pays in counterfeit money.
Judas went out and he hanged himself. That’s the ultimate result of the downward spiral of disillusionment. It may not necessarily be suicide but it’s a form of self-destruction. You pick your poison. You separate yourself from anything that can spiritually impact your life and you choose to live only for yourself and gradually self-destruction takes place.
And that’s why those who follow Jesus must regularly recalibrate. He specifically reminds us of the cost of discipleship when He says in Luke 9:23, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.”
It’s a daily ongoing commitment. Quite a contrast to a traitor named Judas who was willing to sell the savior for some silver. But the opposite of being a sell out is being sold out for Christ.
The story of Judas could have been so different. But because of his ongoing pattern of wanting the Messiah to be what he envisioned and not what God wanted, it culminated in destruction.
Things could’ve been different from that downward spiral. Early on, instead of disappointment he could’ve chosen contentment or discernment, asking God for wisdom to understand why this Messiah was so different than what he had pictured.
Instead of disengaging he could’ve dove into his friendship with the disciples and said, “Am I missing something here? Will you help me understand why I’m the most frustrated with Christ’s agenda?”
When it came to decision time, and he had already made some wrong choices and was in that downward spiral, why didn’t he choose to take a godly risk and change his mind, face the consequences and do the right thing?
You see, disillusionment with God’s expectations for His followers or a Messiah’s agenda doesn’t need to lead to despair---instead it can lead to hope.
And destruction doesn’t need to be the final resting place. Christ wants you to hang in there and experience life—for all eternity!
For many people outside the church, they want a convenient Christianity; one that doesn’t challenge their behavior or demand more than a token visit to a house of worship on special holidays or when the weather’s good. Judas serves as a fateful reminder of what happens when we try to fashion our own God rather than allowing God to be God alone. If we want Him to fit our mold of a Messiah and do what we want then in essence we are placing ourselves on the throne and acting as if we were God.
What a sight that must have been from God’s window as He gazed down at Jerusalem; one man Judas hanging from a tree because of sin. But there was another man hanging from a tree that He saw and He was hanging there to pay for Judas’ sin - and your sin and my sin.
If you’re not a Christian let me ask you a question, Why not? I mean, why haven’t you committed your life to Christ? Pardon me for being so blunt but eternity hangs in the balance, and choice not chance will determine your destination for all eternity.
