VICTORIOUS LIFE
Psalm 13:1-6
We are often too reluctant to tell others that we actually doubt God?s
existence. Why are we in doubt? We might feel that we have done a lot for the Lord. We
have sacrificed everything for Him. We have put in a lot of work, time, mind, feelings
and even money. It?s not rare to find work and family neglected for the sake of church
ministry. What do we get out of it? We get more problems, difficulties and drama in our
lives. Our efforts are fruitless. We get sick and even get fired. What did we do wrong?
What more do we need to do?
We keep these questions in our heart, without anybody knowing them. We shut
our mouth. We dare not tell this to anybody. The risk is too big. People will say that we
have no faith. This is even worse for a priest or a deacon. People will mock us. “What?s
all this about? Church activists are still doubting God?” If a priest happened to hear this,
then we?ll probably be called; he will probably think that you haven?t been saved. Even
worse, we could be asked to retake the catechism class. In this situation, do we ever
doubt our doubt?
Let?s look at the background of the psalmist. After Saul heard the voice of women
in Jerusalem praising David?s victory in defeating the giant Goliath, David?s life was
more threatened and dangerous. Imagine, when he was calmly playing the harp for Saul,
suddenly a spear was thrown at him. But the LORD protected him, and David was
unharmed. It didn?t stop there, Saul tried several ways to finish David. Therefore David
had to flee, and hide in caves. Meanwhile, Saul?s people were consistently searching for
him. David was very pressed and stuck. This was David?s bitter experience that he had
undergone.
Psalm 13 which was written by David talks about the same thing. It begins with 4
questions. :”How long O Lord, will You forget me forever?”, “How long will You hide
Your face from me?”, “How long must I bear pain in my Soul and have sorrow in my
heart all day long?”, and “How long shall my enemy be exalted over me?”
This series of questions were asked by the psalmist, proving that he was in a very
depressing situation. We don?t know how he was when he wrote this particular chapter.
But some guess that the psalmist was afraid of dying. Maybe he was ill; compare this to
Psalm 6. We don?t know why he was ill. Neither do we know what illness he had. It?s
possible that he was being attacked, so he was well physically, but he was not fine,
psychologically.
Apparently, the psalmist was anxious that his hopes in the LORD were in vain.
His younger brother was getting married in a week. But he was murdered by someone
unknown. Invitations had been passed out; everything had been prepared, then this
horrible incident happened. I can imagine that the bride must have tried on the wedding
gown. Maybe their honeymoon to travel abroad had been prepared. But everything was
gone just like that. In such circumstances, man cries to the Lord: “How much longer?”
I can also relate to those whose families are victims of the earthquake in
Jogjakarta. Maybe they just woke up in the morning. Probably they had planned several
things for the future. But accident suddenly happened, as if mercilessly it destroyed all
their dreams.
I don?t quite know whether you have asked the Lord “How long?” Sometimes in
our ministry serving the Lord, I ask that whenever I face certain challenges. How much
longer, LORD? How much longer? We have kneeled, praying and fasting, but our dream
as a congregation to have our own church building has not been fulfilled. How much
longer will You, o Lord, lets a family in our congregation wait for a child? How much
longer? O Lord, you seem so far away and distant from the family of our best friend.
These questions are often asked during our ministry.
Let?s go back to verse 4.
In a state of anxiety, the psalmist was about even with his enemy. They were even
at first, but then his enemies grew stronger than him. Most likely, they rejoiced, but also
mocked and ridiculed him. Thus the psalmist said: “Give light to my eyes or I will sleep
in death” as translated in NIV. In NRSV, it says: “Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep
the sleep of death” Both translations use the word or to show and emphasize a request of
choice. In other words he was saying: “Give me light, or death.” This verse also implies
restoration and healing.
When we experience difficulties in a vulnerable position, sometimes people
around us cannot relate to us. Maybe they even mock us, or rejoice over our failure. We
cannot share this struggle with them. The only way is to share this problem with the Lord
through our personal prayers. We can tell Him everything.
Some retreat places have hills for us to climb, and pray in private. That?s the time
for us to fully express our feelings to the LORD. The LORD is our Father, so we don?t
have to be shy to Him. I?m glad that as a priest, every week I?m given the opportunity to
preach. If I ask my questions to the LORD during the sermon, that?s not a problem.
Prayer is not a mere reaction of a righteous person to problems, but prayer is also a
medicine to fight life challenges. Have you experienced it?
It is very obvious that David was very impatient to hear God?s answer. He felt as
if God was too late to act, because things happened so fast. Like most people, we often
ask God with His power to solve all our problems. We often forget that God enables us to
face and solve our problems. Psalm 13:5-6 (KJV): “Lest mine enemy say, I have
prevailed against him; and those that trouble me rejoice when I am moved. But I have
trusted in thy mercy; my heart shall rejoice in thy salvation. 6
I will sing unto the LORD,
because he hath dealt bountifully with me.”
Since then David realized that the LORD, God , whom he worshiped, is a God of
unfailing love. Thus our response to God is not supposed to be a prayer of complaints.
We must wake up from our slumber of problems. Human life is so weak and fragile, like
a pearl. Thus without God?s unfailing love, we won?t be able to survive. The line between
a normal and abnormal life is very fine. A normal person who doesn?t surrender his life
to God will easily become abnormal.
God?s unfailing love is very visible in David?s life. David escaped many
dangerous situations many times. He always left unscathed. God?s providence is very real
in David?s life. David?s faith was strengthen, and he began to believe. Not only that, he
also rejoiced, because God?s help was clear and real. An commentator said if you have
risen in the Lord, then you will also rise from the despairs of this life. This is what
victorious life means.
The spiritual lesson that we get from David consists of three stages. The first
stage, is that as humans we are weak and fragile. Therefore whenever there are
difficulties, pressure, problems, illness and despair, we easily complain, protest and even
get angry. But sometimes the Lord lets those problems go on in our lives. So we enter the
second stage. This does not mean that God left us. He just wants us to truly realize that
we need His help. In the third stage is the deciding step. God that we worship is indeed
the powerful and almighty God. He gives us the strength to face difficult problems.
Moreover, He leads us to victory.
In remembering the Ascension of Christ to Heaven, we are reminded that He did
not just leave. But He is preparing us our place in Heaven. This was His promise. Once
we have this promise and hope, we never have to worry about anything else whenever we
have to face many problems in our journey to our promised land.
Our biggest mistake is that we prefer a smooth journey. We always want to take
short cuts to get the results. We are just like people with broken bones who want to be
cured without having to have surgery. Have you ever imagined what would happened if
God took short-cuts? Do you ever wonder why there are 24 hours in a day? We feel that
24 hours is just about right. Do you feel bored? But do you ever wonder what happened if
there are only 5 minutes in a day? Do you then feel that time goes too fast? We don?t
have time to do anything. Given the normal amount of time for process which consists of
sadness and joy, we have the opportunity to testify to others that the Lord whom we
worship is not an incompetent God. He is the almighty God who tests us, and enables us
to pass them all.
If tonight, I want to go from San Jose to San Francisco, I need headlights. But I
don?t need a light source that will light my path from San Jose all the way to San
Francisco. All I need is lighting for as far as I can see, maybe for about 10 or 20 meters.
The most important thing is that I know where I?m heading. I must have the directions in
mind to reach San Francisco. So all I need is the lighting from my headlights for the
miles that I will travel. Such is the protection of God in our life. If we can still live well
today, that means God has taken good care of us. This will help us reduce our anxiety
that is unnecessary.
Be glad that we live in the period of Grace. The Lord is always with us. His
power is great, and overpowers nature. We truly believe that He gives us the competence
to face our problems. If not, why would He say: “"Come to me, all you who are weary
and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28; NIV).
Self-Reflection:
1. When prayers are answered or fulfilled, people often doubt God. Have you ever
felt the same? For how long did you feel that way? How do you overcome this
situation?
2. Based on your experience, has the Lord ever left you? How do you explain this to others?
