Worthy of Honor
1 Timothy 5
What is the single most valuable thing in this room? In your car, house, at the restaurant, on a plane, in the office? You and the people who matter in your life.
Family is a sacred entity to God. He designed it. He blessed it. And He keeps an album of it. The parts in the Bible that we think are most boring are chapters that list names after names after names. Names we cannot pronounce. They are called genealogies. Think of it as God’s own family photo album.
Today we store thousands and thousands of photos on our phones. We scroll, we delete, and then we keep adding. We capture time. We capture places. We capture memories. But there’s nothing like dedicating a special album for your own family. Photos of people who mean the most within your family circle. Time will never erase your memories. No matter where the photos were taken or how long ago or the quality or pose, what matter most are the people you identify as family.
In chapter 5, Paul is teaching Timothy how to be a caretaker of people. That’s essentially what leaders are. Good leaders must know how to treat others. How to empower others. And how to uphold standards. Standards that would test the integrity of other leaders. Those who aspire to care for others. A safe church must also be a SMART church. 5 SMART rules when using the Internet – Safe, Meet, Accept, Reliable, Tell.
Just as Timothy was appointed to pastor the church in Ephesus, we have the responsibility to administer to one another. A charge to fortify, safeguard - in ways that protect God’s children from the assault or attack by the enemy. We have a sacred duty to take care of God’s big family.
1. Treat one another with respect
1 Do not rebuke an older man harshly, but exhort him as if he were your father. Treat younger men as brothers, 2 older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity.
“As if” or “like”. Father, brothers, mothers, sisters with a caveat “with absolute purity”. We used to address men as sirs, whether older or younger. Women as ma’am – with respect. Younger women as sisters – with absolute purity.
Let’s start with the older man. Rebuking is necessary sometimes. But with a grown male who is also a believer, we have to be tactical, wise, strategic. Some grow old but never grow up.
Do – establish a mutual, respectful, and edifying relationship with one another.
Don’t – Rebuke older man harshly. Exhort him as if he were your father.
Men are uncomplicated yet terribly complicated at the same time. Paul seems to understand about these men. He gave practical advice. Conversations must be had. With wisdom, tact, and humility. Each person is different. But each situation is an opportunity:
• To learn from difficult people
• To have a chance to understand
• To win them over for Christ
I watched how my mom dealt with a grown man, my dad. Free thinker – prostate cancer – broken - asked mom about God. Sometimes it’s not about telling. Praying, showing, loving. Sometimes you just got to let them see, ask, and find their way to God and let God speak to them himself. He accepted Christ – baptized during Christmas season.
v2 Treat younger women as sisters. Margaret and I grew up same church. She treated me as a brother. I treated her as a sister, and then some. She knew it. We have been equally yoked for 33 years. Charles and Phyllis 50 years. That’s worthy of honor. Men, we’re in it for a long haul. As in U-Haul.
Now you understand why in chapter 2:9-10, Paul said, “I want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds appropriate for women who profess to worship God.” Not worldly, but godly.
Young women, your appeal should be seen through the eyes of your Maker. Believe me, God knows beauty like nobody does. He made you. Sees you with the purest perspective. Adores you with heart filled with love. You deserve nothing less. Any heads with eyes turned your way must contain brains that are sensible, not sexual.
2. Support your family with dignity
I did not intend to preach on the subject of widows especially this time of the year. We have been going through 1 Timothy chapter by chapter. It just so happens that we are here today. I have to be faithful not fearful in letting God’s Word speak for itself. We have among us one someone we love and care about. This time last year, nobody knew brother David would be called home to be with the Lord 6 weeks from now. We sang You Raise Me Up last night. Our sister Evelyn, despite losing the love of her life, has been the one raising all of us up.
The Greek word for widow means “forsaken”, “left empty”, or “empty space.” Therefore, the word “chera” can mean not only a widow but also a “woman living without her husband.” There’s much to say about widows in the Bible but we are going to stick with the context of Paul’s pastoral epistle to a young Timothy as he pastors the church in Ephesus.
3 Give proper recognition to those widows who are really in need. 4 But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God.
As church leaders – know who is in real need. The church should and the church must help – benevolence. But the church must first and always exist for the purpose of providing spiritual care.
As family members – put your faith into practice and take care of your parents and grandparents first and foremost. Start with grandchildren. Honor your parents, which is the first commandment with a promise – Paul quoting the Old Testament Scripture.
As a widow – choose godliness over worldliness.
5 The widow who is really in need and left all alone puts her hope in God and continues night and day to pray and to ask God for help.
Can I say this? Sister Evelyn, if Paul saw you, he would be so proud of you. He would say, “That’s what I’m talking about!”
Paul tells Timothy in v7: 7 Give the people these instructions, so that no one may be open to blame. 8 Anyone (includes everyone) who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
Taking care of your own household is not only a Christian thing. It’s moral and ethical. It is our responsibility to support our own family. Family is the bedrock of society. It’s not a tax deduction benefit. Not an entitlement to your name. Family is the masterpiece of God’s creation. As Christ is the groom, so is the church the bride. As a church …
10 and is well known for her good deeds, such as bringing up children, showing hospitality, washing the feet of the Lord’s people, helping those in trouble and devoting herself to all kinds of good deeds.
3. Appoint church leaders wisely
17 The elders who direct the affairs of the church well are worthy of double honor, especially those whose work is preaching and teaching. 18 For Scripture says, “Do not muzzle an ox while it is treading out the grain,” and “The worker deserves his wages.”
It’s easy to take this out of context. Any pastor who uses this as a principle for their payment, don’t hire him. Let’s be clear. Don’t forget the dialogue. This is instruction for Timothy, not a compensation for aspiring leaders. On the flip side, pastors who preach and teach deserved to be honored. So are deacons and no-name servants. Pastoral calling is a commission, not an entitlement. But don’t let them get hungry (muzzled). Don’t neglect their spiritual nourishment. Don’t work them to death. Offer them according to how God is providing for you through their service. Don’t make your pastor a “widower” – forsaken, left empty, or working alone. Finally, on the text we read earlier:
21 I charge you, in the sight of God and Christ Jesus and the elect angels, to keep these instructions without partiality, and to do nothing out of favoritism.
People are going to be people. We complain! Discern whether people who complain against a leader are doing so with legitimate bases. Pay attention especially if two or three are bringing a similar case. Reprove should be done in the open. Confidentiality is critical (to save a sinful soul) but the church must be SMART to report a problem and provide a good explanation – without partiality, without favoritism. God’s church is a safe place. And a safe church must also be a SMART church.
22 Do not be hasty in the laying on of hands, and do not share in the sins of others. Keep yourself pure.
23 Stop drinking only water, and use a little wine because of your stomach and your frequent illnesses.
24 The sins of some are obvious, reaching the place of judgment ahead of them; the sins of others trail behind them. 25 In the same way, good deeds are obvious, and even those that are not obvious cannot remain hidden forever.
vv22-25 seems to be have an off-sequence flow. Don’t rush to confirm elders. Don’t have anything to do with the sins of others. What type of sins? Paul suddenly turns the focus on Timothy. He recommends a remedy for Timothy’s health issues. You have to take care of yourself before you take care of others.
Then, Paul goes back to the previous topic of sin. Some sins are not immediately obvious. But they are there. Just as good deeds are not immediately realized. It takes time to reveal true intentions and character.
Before we put others to the test, test yourself whether what you are doing is genuine, sincere, pure.
Physical health is equally important as spiritual health. And we need to create an environment to ensure God’s people are safe. As family is a sacred institution to God, the church family is our responsibility to take care. We all have a part in it.
As your pastor, my love for this church family is fueled by my love for God. Or should I say, my love for you is fueled by His love for me. It’s a different kind of love.
• Preserving the love that God has for his people.
• Facilitating God’s delight through your desire
• Going where He sends so we may follow where He is leading
“If the family were a boat, it would be a canoe that makes no progress unless everyone paddles.” (Letty Cottin Pogrebin).
So glad to be on the pages together in God’s big family album. Our God is worthy of our honor. That’s my thanksgiving reflection.
