Some of us have been Christians for a long time and we’ve heard that Jesus is sometimes called the bridegroom. But perhaps some of us have never heard this title of Jesus. I don’t think churches talk about it often enough. It’s one of the most important and wonderful titles of Jesus. When we think about it, it should change the way we see Jesus – and the way we see ourselves.
Jesus talked about the kind of relationship he wanted with his disciples. He told his disciples, ‘You call me TEACHER and LORD, and you are right, for so I am’ [John 13:13]. He told his disciples, ‘I have called you FRIENDS’ [John 15:15]. On one occasion he pointed towards his disciples and said, ‘Here are my MOTHER and my BROTHERS!’ [Matthew 12:49]. These statements give us an idea of the kind of relationship Jesus wants with us. But there is no title which communicates Jesus’ love for us more clearly than the title, ‘Jesus the bridegroom.’
Where does this title come from? The idea of God or Jesus as the bridegroom comes a lot in the Bible. But the Bible is such a big book that you could be excused for missing it.
Let’s take a look at what the Bible has to say about it.
This title, like all the other titles of Jesus we’ve looked at, has its roots in the Old Testament. There are quite a few passages we could look at but I’ll just take three examples, two from the prophet Isaiah and one from the prophet Hosea.
Isaiah tells the people of Israel:
‘For your Maker is your husband,
the Lord of hosts is his name’ [Isaiah 54:5-6]
When Isaiah says ‘Your Maker’ – he clearly means God, creator of the world. God is their husband! And just to be quite clear who Isaiah is talking about, in the next line he writes, ‘the Lord of hosts is his name.’
Isaiah is saying that God, the Lord of hosts, is husband of the people of Israel! It’s an extraordinary idea!
A little bit further on, Isaiah says something similar:
‘…and as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride,
so shall your God rejoice over you’ [Isaiah 62:5]
In this verse, Isaiah doesn’t say that God is Israel’s HUSBAND. He says that God’s attitude towards Israel is like the attitude of a bridegroom towards a bride. Have any of you been to a wedding recently? How was the groom acting? I expect he was wearing the biggest smile you’ve ever seen. He was really, really pleased. The Bible says that this is God’s attitude towards his bride. God is rejoicing. Or he will be. Isaiah writes, ‘So SHALL your God rejoice over you.’
Sometimes we feel that God is a bit fed up with us. We make so many mistakes. We get so much wrong. We know God loves us but we think he loves us because he’s God. But here, Isaiah imagines God as a bridegroom, REJOICING over his bride. It’s great to think of God being delighted with us, thrilled to be getting married to us!
The next prophet we’ll look at is Hosea. Hosea lived at about the same time as Isaiah. Isaiah and Hosea lived at a time when the people of Israel had largely rejected God. Many people in Israel and Judah were following idols such as Baal. But God tells Hosea that he will draw the people of Israel back to him. Then what will happen?
“And in that day, declares the Lord, you will call me ‘My Husband’, and no longer will you call me ‘My Baal’” [Hosea 2:16].
God looks forward to a day when God will be in such a close relationship with his people that they will call him, ‘My husband.’ It wasn’t true in Hosea’s day. But God looked forward to a day when it would be true.
A few verses later, God says this:
‘And I will betroth you to me FOR EVER. I will betroth you to me in righteousness and in justice, in STEADFAST LOVE and in mercy. I will betroth you to me in FAITHFULNESS. AND YOU SHALL KNOW THE LORD’ [Hosea 2:19].
Look at some of the words and phrases God uses. ‘For ever.’ ‘Steadfast love.’ ‘Faithfulness.’
God is committed to an amazing marriage relationship!
Look at how God finishes. He tells Hosea, ‘And you shall know the Lord.’
This statement gives us a vitally important understanding of what God wants.
Here’s an analogy. Imagine that you’re living in a tower block. One day, a fire breaks out. You’re trapped. There’s no way you can get out. But then, you hear the sound of a siren. A fire engine arrives! The firemen put up a long ladder. A fireman climbs up and helps you down. You’re saved! Thank goodness! The next day, you go round to the fire station with a case of whisky and say thank you. But then, you never see the firemen again. You’re saved. But YOU DO NOT KNOW THE FIREMEN.
Some of us treat the Christian life like this. We get it that we’re in trouble because of our sin. We get it that we need a saviour. So, we confess our sins and turn to Jesus. Jesus saves us. We say a big thank you! But at that point, we stop. I mean, the job’s done, isn’t it?
Is that what God wants?
God describes his relationship to the people of Israel as a marriage. He finishes by telling Hosea, ‘And you shall know the Lord.’
THAT is what God wants. God wants his people to relate to him in the way a wife relates to her husband. There is a ‘for ever’ about it. There’s steadfast love. There’s faithfulness. The wife knows her husband. God wants us to know him, to really know him.
Given that the Bible describes God’s people’s relationship with God as a marriage we CANNOT treat God as a fireman who comes to save us – and that’s it. God wants MUCH more. He wants a marriage relationship with us!
When I was preparing this talk, I read quite a bit of a book about Jesus the bridegroom by an American Bible scholar called Brant Pitre. Pitre wrote this:
‘Finally – and this is extremely important … salvation is not just about the forgiveness of sins. From a biblical perspective, salvation is ultimately about union with God.’
If you think that becoming Christian is mainly about being saved from your sins, think again. That IS part of it. But what being a Christian is primarily about is coming into a relationship with God your creator that is so close, so loving, so faithful, so ‘for ever’, that the best way to describe it is as a marriage.
Let’s go on to the New Testament. Does this idea of marriage between God and his people continue in the New Testament? It certainly does!
In the Old Testament, God is the husband or the bridegroom. But in the New Testament, Jesus is the bridegroom. I’m going to look at three passages.
The first passage is Mark 2:18-22.
Some people came to Jesus and asked him, ‘Why do John's disciples and the disciples of the Pharisees fast, but your disciples do not fast?’ Jesus answered, ‘Can the wedding guests fast while the bridegroom is with them? As long as they have the bridegroom with them, they cannot fast.’
Jesus’ meaning was that he was like a bridegroom who had come to a wedding. His disciples, in other words, the wedding guests, were with him. It wasn’t a time for fasting! I can imagine people’s eyes rolling. What was Jesus talking about?
But Jesus then continued, ‘The days will come when the bridegroom is taken away from them, and then they will fast in that day.’
What did Jesus mean? Jesus knew that the cross lay ahead of him. He, the bridegroom, would be taken away from his disciples.
The cross was the point at which Jesus fully and irrevocably gave himself for his bride, when he showed the extent of his love for her.
The second passage is John 3:25-29. John the Baptist had disciples. He told them that someone much greater than he was coming. John then met Jesus and declared that Jesus was the Lamb of God and the Son of God. One day, John’s disciples told him that Jesus was baptizing and everyone was going to him! Maybe they thought John wouldn’t be happy about that. How would a minister feel if a new church opened up not far away, and everyone went there?
But John wasn’t unhappy at all. He reminded his disciples that he’d told them that he wasn’t the Christ. Then he said something very mysterious. He said, ‘The one who has the bride is the bridegroom.’
John had been reading his Bible. He knew that in the Old Testament, God was the bridegroom and God’s people were the bride. John also understood that Jesus was the Son of God. Somehow, John understood that now, Jesus had taken on the role of being bridegroom.
But what did John mean when he said, ‘The one who has the bride is the bridegroom’?
Here’s an analogy which might make it clearer.
How would you spot the groom at a wedding? Before the wedding starts, he’s the guy at the front on the right. He might be dressed in a top hat and tails. But then, the bride arrives. She’s wearing a beautiful white dress. She walks down the aisle and stands next to the groom. Maybe she holds his hand. She looks at him and gazes at him and he looks at her and gazes at her. They’re glued to each other.
You recognize the groom by the fact that he has the bride.
In Israel in Jesus’ day there were Israelites who were true Israelites. They were faithful to God. They were the bride. So, it wasn’t at all surprising that when the bridegroom appeared, they made a beeline for him. Jesus had the bride. That meant he was the bridegroom.
Was John sad about the fact that people were leaving him and going to Jesus? Of course not! It wasn’t a competition! John understood that his role was to be the friend of the bridegroom. The bridegroom had come, the bride was going to him, and John couldn’t be more delighted.
Let’s go on to the third passage. It’s Revelation 19:6-7. God had given the apostle John a vision of the future. John describes what he saw:
‘Then I heard what seemed to be the voice of a great multitude, like the roar of many waters and like the sound of mighty peals of thunder, crying out:
“Hallelujah!
For the Lord our God
the Almighty reigns.
Let us rejoice and exult
and give him the glory,
FOR THE MARRIAGE OF THE LAMB HAS COME,
AND HIS BRIDE HAS MADE HERSELF READY…”’
A marriage is about to take place!
A couple of verses on, an angel comments, ‘Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb’ [19:9].
A wedding has to have a reception! What will that be like, given that God is hosting it? I’m sure it will be amazing!
Finally, one chapter before the end of the Bible, an angel calls to John and says, ‘Come, I will show you the Bride, the wife of the Lamb’ [Revelation 21:9]. I take this to mean that the church, the Bride, is now the wife of the Lamb.
The climax of the Bible, the point of the whole story, is that Jesus ends up married to his people. That’s what it’s all been about.
What are we going to take away from this?
There is no title of Jesus which communicates Jesus’ love for us more clearly than the title, ‘Jesus the bridegroom.’
Jesus is offering us the most amazing relationship. It’s one in which we don’t simply relate to him as teacher or lord or friend or brother. It’s one in which we, the church, relate to Jesus as husband. The best picture of the steadfast love, the faithfulness, the ‘forever’ nature of the relationship which Jesus is inviting us into is a marriage.
But this relationship demands something of us. It demands A LOT from us, in fact! God is a jealous God. He won’t accept second place. Do we want this relationship with God? If we do, we have to decide that God will come first. We can’t treat God as a fireman. We can’t say to him, ‘You’ve saved me, thanks very much’ – and then ignore him.
In a human marriage, you have to spend time with your spouse. You have to get to know him or her. You have to be faithful and committed. All those things are true of our relationship with Jesus. Human marriage can be amazing. Our relationship with Jesus is even more amazing.
Are you in that relationship! Praise God! Work at it! Give Jesus your undivided love.
Are you not yet in that relationship? Jesus is offering to be in a relationship of the greatest love with you. If you haven’t yet said yes to that, and you’d like to, or you have questions, please do come and talk to me afterwards.
TALK GIVEN AT ROSEBERY PARK BAPTIST CHURCH, BOURNEMOUTH, UK, 10TH NOVEMBER 2024, 4 P.M. SERVICE.
Note: In preparing this talk I made use of the book, ‘Jesus the Bridegroom: The Greatest Love Story Ever Told’ by Brant Pitre. I’d strongly recommend it.
