James - No Spin Zone
James 1:19-26
September 15, 2024
According to relationship and communication experts, the most important aspect in any relationship is what?
LISTENING!
Yet, listening is not easy, is it? How long it will take some of you to start day dreaming during my message? When you get there just stand up, so we all know! Maybe, you’re wondering about lunch.
Maybe, it’s just shut him up so I can watch pregame before the Colts beat the Packers! Sorry, George!
Experts call listening an art. It’s active engagement with others. Do you know the difference between listening and hearing?
Hearing is just a bunch of noise, listening is taking that noise and making sense of it. It’s like when anyone talks to you, it’s noise, that gets deciphered into listening. COSMO
We’re looking at the book of James. James tells us in 1:19 ----
19 Know this, my beloved: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; - James 1:19
This is such a great verse and one we’re going to talk about. Now, I want to give an example of this not taking place. It’s really the opposite and we do this all too often - - - -
Be slow to hear, quick to speak and quick to be angry!
Have you ever been in those shoes?
This actually happened very recently. Do you know what happened on Tuesday evening? It was reality TV at it’s best and at it’s worst.
There was a presidential debate! I’ll be really honest with you - - - - I only watched for about 30 minutes AND was so disgusted I put on the 3 Stooges.
Let me explain a bit ---- ---- It was reality TV at it’s best. It served it’s purpose, 2 people sparring with one another, not listening to one another, not answering questions, putting one another down and really not showing any humility.
Neither one being presidential. That’s reality TV at it’s best. That’s the design of reality TV.
But it was also reality TV at it’s worst, because of basically the same reasons - - - - it showed 2 people who wouldn’t listen to one another, who really couldn’t stand one another, who insulted one another and they did it before America and the rest of the world. And that’s embarrassing.
The questions were 100% designed to have this happen. They asked questions that would lead to vitriol and disrespect. Both candidates blatantly calling one another liars.
They were quick to be angry and slow to listen.
I don’t care who won, as a nation, we lost.
But how do you determine the winner of anything? Is it the score? Is it the last one standing?
For the men, as we start Betterman tonight, is it the one with the most money, the best job, the prettiest wife, the most technology, the most toys? How do we define what it means to be a man of God? That’s part of the journey we’re starting tonight.
Is it the man who demonstrates grace and love and devotion to his family? Or is it the one who can demonstrate humility and integrity and is able to connect with others?
What James says is so important. Especially in today’s world. I’m calling this series, “THE NO SPIN ZONE.” I forgot that was coined by the Bill O’Reilly show. So, I’m borrowing from him.
That’s what James is about. There’s no spin, he’s giving us the message of the gospel on how to live our lives and it’s in your face and mine. James is telling us, “This is how we are called to live our lives.”
There are lots of perspectives out there and lots of different books and materials to help us be successful. But, how we define success, determines what we go after!!
Some people think, “If I were famous, then I’d be successful.” Is it money? Power? Possessions? How do we define success?
The Bible actually has a term for it. I believe there’s 2 words. Wisdom and humility. A successful life according to the Bible is a life lived with wisdom and humility. James helps us see what a successful life looks like, by living with both of these.
The first thing he tells us - - - - is be quick to listen. The word QUICK in the Greek means to be swift; or speedy; go without unnecessary delay. Is that how we approach listening to others.
How many of us are still on our phones when someone is talking to us, or watching a program and not turning and facing that person?
Listening can be a challenge. I’ve failed at it many times, most especially with Debbie! She should be the one I give the most attention to, but I find myself easily distracted.
And what’s worse, when someone isn’t actively listening to you, you know it. You see it in their affect. You can read their body language, and you’re communicating what they’re saying IS NOT important.
Sometimes we’re in a conversation and we might find ourselves nodding and smiling, but we’re daydreaming. You notice some odd feature on their face. Or food stuck in their teeth.
You’re in the midst of this conversation and what we often do, especially in disagreements is - - - we guess what they’re going to say next. And while we’re thinking about what they’re going to say, we come up with a great retort. So, you don’t really listen to them, you’re actually thinking, “Hurry up and finish, because this is gonna be good, and I don’t want to forget what I was going to say.”
James says when we really want to experience success in life we have to learn to listen. Be quick to listen to others. Listen first!! That’s wisdom and humility in one. It’s humility because you’re putting someone ahead of you.
Daniel Goleman who wrote the book Emotional Intelligence, stated ‘learning to listen is the most important relational skill you can learn, period.’
What is it that really brings people together and forms bonds? It’s when you sense the other person really cares about who you are and is willing to listen to you.
If you really want to impress people and make some friends, learn to listen, so that you can understand what the other person is really saying.
The goal is to seek to understand before seeking to be understood. Proverbs 17:28 tells us - - - -
28 Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent. - Proverbs 17:28
Isn’t that great? Even a fool will be perceived as wise if he were just quiet. Or this modern proverb - - - “It’s better to have people think you are a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.” There is wisdom in listening.
Not only do you find success in life by listening, but I also believe James has a deeper meaning going on too. He’s also referring to listening to God’s word. Learning to listen to what God has for us. Learning to listen to God’s call in our lives.
Be quick to open the Bible and listen to God’s word. Don’t argue back with Him, when you pray take time to listen to His wisdom. When you have a decision to make, don’t just say a quick prayer and go, but ask God for His wisdom to fill you, and then take the time to listen for His answer.
It’s not just about listening, but it’s also thinking or being slow to speak. The word for SLOW in the Greek means - - - taking time to deliberate; unhurried, while still moving forward after considering all the facts.
Yet, people like this can drive us crazy! They have to think things through, when in our opinion, the answer is obvious. But they’re being slow and deliberate, considering the facts and the discussion.
Think before you speak. How many of us have put our foot in our mouth? Have you done that? We all know what that feels like. I’ve done that many, many times in my life.
Just think about the quick answers from the debate the other night! There wasn’t a pause, there were simply and sadly, quick retorts. It could have looked different, but we’ll get to that later.
You see the call is for us to be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. Every time I meet with a couple prior to their marriage we talk about this passage. It’s crucial.
Be quick to listen - means listen first, listen with urgency. Then be slow to speak, don’t formulate your response while they are talking. WHY? Because you are quick to listen.
You’re trying to gain an understanding of what they’re saying to you. And if you understand, because you didn’t come up with a quick response, then you are more apt to not become as angry.
WHY?
Because you understood where they’re coming from. It doesn’t mean you agree with them or even like what they’re saying, but you’ve listened and took it in. And that’s so important and a great prescription for success.
James continues by telling us - - - -
19 Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; 20 for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.
It’s not that anger is bad! God never tells us you CANNOT EVER become angry! The Bible doesn’t say that! But anger, when it’s misused can be very destructive. So, if you’re angry, because you didn’t listen, but were quick to speak and quick to be angry, then you’re not producing the righteousness of God.
We’re not demonstrating God’s righteousness through our lives. That’s when anger becomes destructive. It’s in raising our voices and shouting over another person. It’s formulating judgments about another person and convicting them as guilty without any facts.
So James now tells us - - - -
21 Therefore put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls. - James 1:21
James is writing - - - - in light of what I’ve just told you, this is how you’re supposed to live and act. Get rid of all filthiness which really is our moral filth that destroys our soul. It’s taking off those dirty clothes and putting on what’s clean AND get rid of that super abundant wickedness which starts in your soul and is displayed outwardly. Get rid of it all!!
Because if you don’t, there’s no evidence that your soul has been saved. So, receive God’s word planted within you, because of your humility, your meekness, which is your power, but held in reserve.
But James isn’t done talking about listening. Catch his next verses as he refers to our listening and talking - - - -
22 But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.
23 For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror.
24 For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like.
25 But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing.
26 If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person's religion is worthless.
James is saying --- it’s very important that we think before we speak.
The person who doesn’t bridle his tongue, which is an equestrian term. Bridling means you keep a tight reign on the horse because the horse could buck you off if you don’t. James is saying the same thing about our tongue. It can take us places we really don’t want to go if we let it loose.
And he tells us that if we don’t have a tight rein on our tongue, we’re tricking and deceiving our heart, and our religion is worthless. Notice he doesn’t refer to our faith. It’s our religion. He wants us to understand that our religion ultimately will not profit us at all, it’s ineffectual.
The context of the word worthless takes us back to the O.T. and idol worship. James is telling us when a person worships something other than God their religion was worthless because it wasn’t connected to anything with real power and meaning. When you can’t control your tongue, your religion is useless.
So, if you hear the word, but immediately forget it, just like forgetting what you look like when looking in a mirror, you’re deceiving yourself.
More than that, James would tell us it’s a sign you’re playing games with God. You hear the word, but believe it only applies to others, and not you. The call from James is to stop and take inventory of yourself.
So, let me say this for you! Ouch! James is just laying it straight out there for us. There’s no beating around the bush. It’s in your face, with no spin. Think before we speak.
We love to talk. So, here’s an experiment to try. Remember from last week, did anyone tell someone that their original story was “No longer operative?” Just wondering how it went!
So, this week, I want you to consider how many times you interrupt somebody. We love to talk, and we love our thoughts and ideas. How many times will you cut someone off while they are talking or what I’m really good at doing is jumping in when you take a breath. Just don’t breathe when you’re talking to me! :)
We love to be heard. That’s very important. But James is reminding us, there’s incredible wisdom when you think first.
We can get into all types of topics that go along with speaking before our brain kicks in, but there’s times when our brain is fully engaged, and we go ahead anyways.
Usually, that’s when we GOSSIP. Then we have MALICE and SLANDER and more that easily comes out of our mouths. None of it is edifying to God. We try to pacify ourselves when we do this. And not hold ourselves accountable.
Are you talking about your boss behind his or her back in a way that’s not healthy? Everyone talks about their boss, right? But are you engaging in this in a way that’s doing damage to your soul or to their soul? Think before you speak. Are you doing that with a coworker?
James says to think before you speak. Get control of your tongue. It will make a difference. Listen, in your job or in your relationship with your spouse, if you start learning to listen and thinking before you speak you will experience success. It’s inevitable. It’s inevitable that people will begin to think more highly of you.
It’s inevitable that people will begin to respect you. Why? Because you’re demonstrating respect of others. It’s inevitable that they will begin to turn to you because you don’t seem to just talk. When you say something it matters. It’s important. That’s part of what the Bible is getting at in this whole idea of living with wisdom.
What if on Tuesday night, Former President Trump and Vice President Harris engaged in a debate where after someone spoke, the other one listened, pondered their words, maybe even acknowledged their words and commented with gentleness and grace, if they were quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. What if . . . .
Let me lead us to the end of the message. Go back to verse 25 - - - -
25 But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing.
This is right after the verse about looking at yourself in the mirror and forgetting what you look like.
James is saying to look in the mirror of God’s word. “It’s the perfect law that gives freedom.” WOW! Isn’t that a cool phrase to hear about God’s word. The Bible is the perfect law that gives freedom.
I’ll guarantee you that if you go out in our culture and talk to people about their perceptions of the Christian faith – what does it mean to be a follower of Christ?
Most people don’t think it’s about freedom. Following Jesus means you turn in your fun card. Following Jesus means you don’t get to enjoy yourself anymore.
You become anti everything. It means you go to church and talk about Jesus all day. You get told you must do this and that. And if you fail, you’re going to burn. So, follow all of these rules and laws which take away your freedom.
When you become a follower of Christ, turn the lights out the party is over. All the fun is done. How are you going to live this life of boring drudgery and duty?
James says, “If you really want to discover freedom in your life, look into the law of God.” It’s like the law of gravity. We don’t break the law of gravity. You can jump out of a 20 story building and you aren’t going to break the law of gravity. It’s going to break you.
The same thing is true with the law of God. God has commands. He’s wired the universe up a certain way. When we break those laws, we find out those laws break us.
But if you begin to live in obedience to the commands of God that’s where you will find real freedom, joy, and fun.
You’ll find friends who will care about you and love you no matter what.
You will find people who will gather around you and celebrate with you.
They’ll also weep with you.
They’ll be there to love you and encourage you . . . . . no matter what’s happening in life. They are there for you!
When you look in the mirror of the Bible it reminds us - - - - you are never alone!! God is here.
We look in the mirror of God’s word and it says, “Don’t worry,” because God is in control.
It exclaims to us - - - - you are accepted.
You can walk into the world and live as a person who is accepted by God not because of how great you are but because you are made in God’s image and Jesus died for you and you’ve said yes to Jesus.
The Bible says you are forgiven. When you place your faith and trust in Jesus Christ you are forgiven. Not because of anything you do, but because of His grace.
You go into the day and you live your life as someone who has been forgiven, not as someone who is trying to earn forgiveness.
When you look into the law of God you realize that you are a saint. Sounds kind of weird, doesn’t it? Paul says we are saints. Peter says we’re saints, more so, we’re priests.
They’re writing about you. The saints at FBC.
The Bible says we are saints. Why? Because that is what Christ has done for us in dying for us and declaring us righteous. Through faith we are saints. Live like it. Start to match your life to what the Bible says you already are.
James gives it to us straight. Listen to one another. Listen to God. Love God and love one another. Be guided by His wisdom and practice humility. You’ll always be a winner!
