Marriage and Divorce
Mark 10:1-12
Good morning everyone, glad to have you join us in person or by internet.
We have been in a series called relationships.
We are in the third week and the first week established our foundational relationship that must be in the Lord Jesus.
If you do not have a right relationship with the Lord, it will affect all relationships that you are in from your family, spouse, or friends.
The second one we looked at was shaping the family.
The world today is destroying or at least trying to destroy the institution of family and the institution of marriage.
We looked at several ways that you can shape your family in a godly and productive way to not only survive but live abundantly in a world that is crashing and burning when it comes to relationships.
Remember some of the things we saw
Be a good listener
Be consistent if discipline is needed for your kids
Don’t play favorites
Don’t live your life through your kids
Admit your mistakes…these are a few of the things talked about. Maybe listen to the sermon again and write some of these things down.
This morning topic is the delicate subject of marriage and divorce.
Remember I said at the beginning if you have a problem with something I said we can have a discussion, if it is something God said, you need to have that conversation with Him.
Mark 10:1-12 read from the Bible
Our world has slap the face of God on the sanctity of marriage for a very long time and it is getting worse. That is not a doom and gloom, that is a fact.
In 1910, the divorce rate in America was 10 %. There was little co-habitation and that only one out of ten marriages ended in divorce.
In 1948 the divorce rate was 25%- in 38 years it had grown another 15% and now one our four marriages ended in divorce.
One historian said at that time (1948) a civilization could not survive if ¼ of the people married ended in divorce.
Today 2024, it is well over 50% of marriages end in divorce- the sad fact is that the numbers are not much different between believers and unbelievers and some polls have the church having more divorces than unbelievers.
Today, we protect ourselves with prenuptial agreements- contracts that protect what you bring into the marriage- just in case you want out, you don’t loss your shirt. They are planning to fail because they have an escape clause in the contract.
Today, most young people look at the older generations that have not done a good job of showing them the real sanctity of marriage and most believe today they would rather cohabitate than have a marriage license issued and then get a divorce.
That piece of paper does not mean anything to them.
Most young people today are not concerned that they get married in a church when they do get married.
Staying before a minister and a congregation of people before God has lost it appeal and most get married on a beach with a friend who has gotten a temporary ministers license online to do a ceremony that does not include God
Society better known as public opinion overrides what God has ordained.
Society approves of a lack of commitment
They give no thought to what happens to children.
They keep moving from one intimate relationship to another and not realizing or not caring how many broken lives are hurt in the process.
They freely leave a relationship for any and all reasons as their feelings dictate.
Today our personal needs go ahead of what God has given in His Word.
We have homes without Fathers and homes without a biblical foundation to stand on.
We have broken dreams and broken hearts and blended families that try to make the best of the mess they have created.
There are not many homes today with both the father and mother of the children living in the same household with the same values.
For Christians we are held to a higher standard and it doesn’t matter what culture is dictating but what God word says.
Boundaries are set up in the bible for a reason.
It is not so we cannot have fun.
It is to prevent the hurts and destroyed lives that are the result of one night stands and selfish actions by generations of people that are only looking for pleasure and instant gratification instead of a committed relationship.
Each time an intimate relationship is had, there is a bonding that takes place spiritually wither you want it too or not.
Society calls it hooking up but God says that it is “cleaving” or joining together of two people not only physically but also spiritually.
Back to the text-
The region of Jordan, Jesus taught those who were following him, the Pharisees came to Jesus with a question- “is it lawful to divorce”?
Scripture told us that “they tested him”!
They really did not want to know his stance on the issue but was trying to trip him up so they could hold it against him and better yet have him killed for his going against the law (5 books of Old Testament)
What was the test?
To trip him up so that they could get him in a catch 22, that either way they would be able to disgrace and put him to death.
Remember Mark chapter 6, John the Baptist went against and objected that Herod was divorce and married his brother’s wife Herodias. Herod took the head of John the Baptist and the Pharisees wanted to be able to go back to Herod with the hope that the same thing would happen to Jesus.
The book of Deuteronomy speaks of divorce as defining what an unclean thing is-
Remember if a woman was caught in adultery, there was no need for a court, they just got a group together with rocks and they stoned her for her actions.
The man on the other hand, could somehow slip out the back door and no punishment was given.
The rabbis had two ways of interpreting this passage-
One conservative and one more liberal ideals. There is always one conservative ideal and one liberal thinking on most issues then and today.
The conservative believed that it had to be a “shameful act of sexual misconduct”.
Somewhere just under adultery because that already had a stoning as judgment.
They defined as needed what was a shameful act of sexual conduct.
Anything less and the couple was expected to stay together even if they did not love each other anymore.
The liberal ideal defined anything “unclean” with a more broad stroke of the brush.
R.C. Sproul goes as far in one sermon to say that for the wise liberals…anything that embarrasses him, disgraces him, or even displeases him would be enough to rid her with a certificate of divorce.
A women could be thrown out for burning the toast, break a favorite dish by accident, or even say the wrong thing. They would not even have to prove it or get a second opinion, the man made that decision.
So it is today- What do we do with the words that Jesus has spoke to us concerning divorce.
The prevailing view of the time was the liberal view…as is today. Whatever and whenever you want out, there is a way out.
It turned into a political and a religion thing as is today.
They put Jesus on the spot that no matter what He said they would try to trap him.
Go against the words of Moses or against public opinion and Jesus was on the hot seat. The same is today.
Christians are on the hot seat for merely standing in agreement with what the Bible tells us because that is not the majority.
The Bible is the written and authoritative word of Almighty God.
He may not be the majority of the people but God against anything is a Majority.
Jesus was not concerned about public opinion- Jesus was concerned about doing the will of God above all else.
Truth and holiness and bring honor unto the Father….Amen.
Jesus says what does Moses say? Right back to the word of God
Moses permitted a certificate of Divorce
A certificate that was given as proof that a woman was no longer with the man and she could be remarried.
Both conservative and liberal sides agreed upon the certificate of divorce-
Jesus said “Because of the hardness of your heart, Moses wrote this precept.”
God instituted the sanctity of marriage, it was His idea from creation.
Man leaves his mother and Father/ parents take their hands off and let the couple begin to run their own life.
A man and a woman- sanctity of marriage blessed of God is a man and a women, male and a female. The two becoming one.
To procreate, to multiply- if they are medically able and desiring children.
Two becoming one and same sex marriages cannot procreate.
What God has put together, let man not separate- meaning what God has instituted, let man not change.
In a perfect world before sin entered into it, there was no provision for divorce.
There was nothing caused by sin to destroy the marriage, today many sinful things come into play that can and will destroy what God has put together.
Dr Tony Evan goes as far as saying that he believes from scripture that being single is because of the fall that man was not intended to be alone and as God made Eve for man, that again in a perfect world no one would be isolated and alone.
Sacred and holy
Not only till we don’t get along
Not until we fall out of love or find someone else.
Not as long as we are happy defined by only what makes us happy.
If you are trying to mend a marriage and you are seeing other people, you are only muddying up waters that are already muddy.
In a perfect world it was for as long as you both shall live!
Sexual immorality Moses talks about- in study it is called the acceptance clause- you can leave a marriage for sexually immoral behavior- you do not have to leave but you are able to biblically leave.
Today with so many different ways to attract sexual diseases it would be a risk to stay with someone active in the world.
Today pornography is rampant and is a validation of the sanctity of marriage.
Trust in the marriage has been validated by the sexual desires of pictures and lustful thought of others.
Apostle Paul in the New Testament gives us another peek into scripture-
When in a marriage as two unbelievers and one becomes a believer, Paul tells us that if the unbeliever is willing to stay in the marriage that the believer is not to leave, so as to maybe convert the unbeliever and share their faith. If the unbeliever wants the believer to go because of their new faith, they are able to leave.
Closing
This is a big thing to believers and should be a big thing to unbelievers.
To all those who have been affected by divorce and remarriage, The Lord is gracious and willing to heal and forgive.
Many have been divorced and or remarried.
There are many blended families. It is not the perfect way but it may be where you are at.
Many marriages have people with a past and you are where you are and the Lord desires to speak to you this morning.
I know if Jesus can speak into the life of the Samaritan women at the well (John 4) that He can speak into our lives.
He speaks to her salvation and forgiveness. He tells her to go get her husband all knowing that she has no husband at home but living with someone.
He tells her that he knows she has had 5 husbands.
I think he can speak into your situation with healing and wisdom.
As challenging and messy as divorce, it is not the unpardonable sin and it is not outside the realm of God’s mighty Grace and mercy.
There can be healing for the innocent as well as the guilty party if they will come to Jesus with repentance and a heart that wants Jesus.
Let’s have a time of prayer-
