Sermon - Control Your Tongues to Work God's Way
Scripture: Ephesians 4:29-32 “Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. 30 And do not bring sorrow to God’s Holy Spirit by the way you live. Remember, he has identified you as his own, guaranteeing that you will be saved on the day of redemption. 31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. 32 Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.
INTRODUCTION: You are not your own, you belong to God, you have a new attitude, so Control Your Tongues to Work God's Way. The Bible says, “the tongue can no man tame.” Man has the power to subdue the largest, strongest, and wildest beasts in nature, yet he has not the power to subdue his tongue. All that he can do, is to put on it the bridle (James 1.26) and be slow speak, swift to hear and slowness to wrath.
James 3:2-7 “Indeed, we all make many mistakes. For if we could control our tongues, we would be perfect and could also control ourselves in every other way. 3 We can make a large horse go wherever we want by means of a small bit in its mouth. 4 And a small rudder makes a huge ship turn wherever the pilot chooses to go, even though the winds are strong. 5 In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches. But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. 6 And among all the parts of the body, the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself. 7 People can tame all kinds of animals, birds, reptiles, and fish, 8 but no one can tame the tongue. It is restless and evil, full of deadly poison.”
We are a sound bite, acronym generation. So when it comes to really communicating we are not very good. It can be tough to communicate effectively. Because communication is shared with the tongue, but comes from the heart.
“Proverbs 18:21, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” In the NLT “The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.”
Our key verse is Ephesians 4:29 (KJV), “Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth...” Literally, corrupt communication is rank, foul, rotten, worthless. Rotten words come from rotten hearts.
Psalm 19:14, “Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Thy sight.”
Our communication as Christians is important because all of us need to feel heard, appreciated and respected. Ephesians 4:15 cautions us “...to speak the truth in love...” Christians who do it well, are those who learn how to discuss their differences, humble yourselves and work through differences of opinion without destroy one another or tearing down one another.
Ephesians 4:29 NCV, “...do not say harmful things, but say what people need...” Remembering 1. We all need to Respect. 2. Appreciation 3. Honesty and 4. Acceptance. Recognize that each of us are different because God loves variety. Let’s Communicate clearly. Communicate encouragingly. Communicate in various ways until we find the right approach. Why? Because we belong to God. Three things in the text: 1. Learn to communicate with a credible, honest and gentle tongue (vs. 25). 2. Learn to Eliminate the trash from your communication 3. Learn to Make encouragement a major part of your communication.
Do you ever have a problem with your tongue? Sometimes we do. It might be lying: -"It wasn't me!" "I didn't do it." "I'm feeling under the weather today, so I won't be in to work." "I'm going to be working late tonight. It might be gossiping, “Did you hear about . . .?" "Don't repeat this, but . . ." "I probably shouldn't say this, but"… It might be hurtful, "I hate you!" "Shut up!" "Can't you do anything right?" "I can't stand them." "You’re just crazy." If we would admit it, we can have all kinds of problems with our tongues sometimes, but Christians, we can do better. By God's grace we can start new habits in our speech. We can control our tongues to work God's way. Let's explore the text to see what God wants us to do. We must bridle our tongue constantly and guide with bridle.
1. Learn to communicate with a credible, honest and gentle tongue. God wants us to have honest tongues. We see this truth in vs. 25, where Paul said: "Therefore, putting away lying, each one speak truth with his neighbor, for we are members of one another."
Don't lie, speak with a credible, honest, and gentle tongue. Thou shalt not bear false witness is one of the Ten Commandments, and it's one of the first Commandments we break: "He hit me first!" "She started it!" "I didn't break it." *Gary Huckaby talks about the time he caught his little girl eating jelly out of the jar. Little Nikki was about four years old at the time. And Dad asked her, "Nikki, are you eating out of the jelly jar?" "No sir," she answered. *"Are you sure you are not eating out of the jelly jar?" Church, she had jelly all over her face, on her fingers, and even in her hair! But again, she said, "No sir, I'm not eating jelly out of the jar." (1) We learn to lie at a very young age. And it turns out that dishonesty is a very serious problem. It's serious because all relationships are built on trust, and trust is destroyed by lies. Thank God that trust can be rebuilt over time! But no wonder God made being honest one of His Ten Commandments. "Therefore, putting away lying, each one speak truth with his neighbor, for we are members of one another." God wants us to establish a credible, honest, and gentle tongue. Then others will know we can be trusted and have the best interest in mind. Truthfulness must be fundamental to the Christian lifestyle.
2. Learn to Eliminate the trash from your communication. God also wants us to eliminate the trash. Eliminate the trashy talk. Take out the trash. As we see in vs. 29: "Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers." That word "corrupt" means worthless and rotten. Then, vs. 31 says, "Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice." The "evil speaking" there is where we get our word "blasphemy." But this kind of evil, abusive language can be against both people and God. God says, "Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth." "Let all evil speaking be put away from you."
Take out the trash, -- like cussing. How long has it been since you said a cuss word? I almost never hear people cuss around me that who know me, because most people just don't cuss around the preacher. But sometimes Christians do fall into the bad habit of cussing. And that's a problem because it disguises who we are as believers. People need to see Christ in us the hope of glory. But they probably won’t if we have a foul mouth. *Well, you may not have cussed in 5 years, but what about gossiping? What about murmuring and complaining all the time? I know you get the idea. God considers all of it trash. Let’s take out the trash. The idea is to pick it up and throw it away. Take out the trash. And Christian, if you need some help getting started, think back to the fact that people don't cuss around the preacher. If you want some help taking out the trash, consciously focus on the fact that Jesus Christ is right there with you. That ought to help. Whether it's cussing, gossip, complaining or something else, God wants us to eliminate trashy talk. (my wife was singing the other day, “A little bit of Chicken fried, cold beer on a Saturday, a pair of jeans that fit just right”) If Satan cannot warp our attitude, he wants to control our tongue. James 3:6-8 “And among all the parts of the body, the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself. 7 People can tame all kinds of animals, birds, reptiles, and fish, 8 but no one can tame the tongue. It is restless and evil, full of deadly poison.” Get rid of the trash!
3. Learn to Make encouragement a major part of your communication. God also wants us to start encouraging other people. *Verse 29 says, "Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification. . ." "Edification" there means "building people up." So the NIV says, "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." The New Living Translation says: "Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them." God wants us to use our tongues to encourage and build each other up. Are you doing that? It can make an amazing difference in people's lives.
1 Thessalonians 5:11 — “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.” This verse commands Christians to continue to encourage and lift fellow followers of Jesus. Encourage one another by embracing every opportunity, at a convenient time to introduce anything that is good and will build up believers and be of spiritual benefit of those on this Christian Journey. In other words, search for the right words, and find the most appropriate way and right tone of voice to build up and encourage others on this journey with you. Why do we need to build up one another? Because our journey is long, difficult, and discouraging. Encouragement makes it easier to live in a fallen world in a holy way. Encouragement makes it easier to love as Jesus loved (see John 13:34-35). Encouragement gives hope (Romans 15:4). Encouragement helps us through times of discipline and testing (Hebrews 12:5). Encouragement nurtures patience and kindness (see 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 and Galatians 5:22-26). Encouragement makes it easier to sacrifice our own desires for the advancement of God’s kingdom. In short, encouragement makes it easier to live the Christian life. Encouragement builds up the body of Christ!
Don’t forget about encouraging yourself! Some often remember to encourage others, but they are down on themselves, critical of themselves and even hard on themselves. The Psalms of David shows us over and over how David encouraged himself, so must we. “This is the day that the Lord Has made and I will rejoice in it. So, 1. Communicate with a credible, Honest and Gentle Tongue. 2. Eliminate the Trash from your communication. 3. Learn to Encourage Others and yourself. When we control our tongues to work God's way, we will be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you! Remember, each of us has a control switch or bridle for our tongue, you cannot control mine and I cannot control yours, we can keep our tongues under control with the help of the Holy Spirit. Our tongue is like a controlling bridle, a studder of a ship or a steering wheel on a car, guiding us into the future. We choose the destination, so handle with care!
