TITLE: “MODESTY LADIES WE NEED YOUR HELP!”
In a few moments I am going to show a video that I think will serve us best if we understand the heart of what it’s saying, and also what I will be attempting to convey to all of us this morning..
First off, it is important to know we were designed by God, male and female made he they.
Second – We were made different and yet similar. Example Apple computer and IBM computer.
Thirdly – We have the opportunity to help each other with those differences and in doing so, be who God called us to be.
Or we can ignore the message to our own ruin, or the ruin of others.
I’m not sure if there has ever been a day where this topic needed more to be discussed than our day and age.
It is important that you hear and get what I am saying this morning:
Psalm 139 says this - 14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
The term “ Your works are wonderful” clearly is intended to say the design is good and unflawed.
Having said that, this morning I want to focus on one aspect of how God created men.
• And how that aspect designed to be a blessing, can become a curse, if either the man chooses to look outside the spectrum of what God intended purpose was, or if women choose, either unintentionally, or intentionally to exploit it.
Let’s watch the video. It’s a bit lengthy but please listen carefully, and let the Holy Spirit prepare your heart for the importance of what it is saying.
PLAY VIDEO:
The video doesn’t begin with blame, but rather the kind of honest confession that men in particular need to admit and make.
Men were created by God to be stimulated toward their wives visually. Again the design was good.
But men are continually bombarded with the society around them, combined with their own still imperfect heart, and often succumb to its temptation and go both in thought and action to places God never intended them to go.
The Book of Proverbs is an excellent devotional reminder to men to face squarely this constant threat both to your relationship with God, and with the woman you love and are married to.
Or for those not married your relationship with God and the very premise upon which you will view your responsibility if and when you do marry, and presently.
PROV 5 counsels this to men - 1 My son, pay attention to my wisdom, turn your ear to my words of insight, 2 that you may maintain discretion and your lips may preserve knowledge. 3 For the lips of the adulterous woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil; 4 but in the end she is bitter as gall, sharp as a double-edged sword. 5 Her feet go down to death; her steps lead straight to the grave. 6 She gives no thought to the way of life; her paths wander aimlessly, but she does not know it.
7 Now then, my sons, listen to me; do not turn aside from what I say. 8 Keep to a path far from her, do not go near the door of her house,9 lest you lose your honor to others and your dignity[a] to one who is cruel,
THE WRITER CONTINUES - 15 Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well. 16 Should your springs overflow in the streets, your streams of water in the public squares? 17 Let them be yours alone, never to be shared with strangers. 18 May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. 19 A loving doe, a graceful deer— may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be intoxicated with her love. 20 Why, my son, be intoxicated with another man’s wife? Why embrace the bosom of a wayward woman?
21 For your ways are in full view of the LORD, and he examines all your paths. 22 The evil deeds of the wicked ensnare them; the cords of their sins hold them fast. 23 For lack of discipline they will die, led astray by their own great folly.
Prov 6 - 24 keeping you from your neighbor’s wife, from the smooth talk of a wayward woman. 25 Do not lust in your heart after her beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes.
These passages imply two things:
1. Men are stimulated visually
2. Women know men are stimulated visually, but don’t fully understand the consequences of that.
My example would be the emphasis in our society on cleavage, on bikinis on clingy clothing. Women know that gets guys eyes, but like the video said, I wish they knew just what those men were thinking about them for it.
1. Time won’t allow but I would challenge ALL MEN to print out Proverbs 7 and read it every day.
2. See yourself for what you are when you give in, a lamb being led to the slaughter.
3. We know in scripture what a great man of God King David was, both before becoming King and after and yet most if not all of us are aware of his moral failure with Bathsheba.
This I believe is like a second phase of what men face with the issue of this visual stimulation.
Most people are aware that men, usually anywhere from their late 30’s, early 40’s to their early 60’s go through what the natural counseling field calls “ Mid-life Crisis.”
Mid-life Crisis – is the point that they suddenly realize their youth is going or is gone. It’s the point where they begin to feel a bit insecure. But also a bit challenged to see if they still got it.
From the timeline of Scripture – that would appear to be where David was at when his indiscretion took place with Bathsheba, the wife of Uriah.
Vs. 1 He should have been out leading his army, but even that seems to have gotten to be too much. He has conquered so many things but he is smart enough to realize he isn’t what he used to be, yet when he is up on the roof and sees Bathsheba the wife of Uriah bathing in the nude, that visual stimulation thing kicks in, and he makes no effort to turn his head or get away from there, worse yet he chooses to act out on what he is feeling.
James Epistle touches on what I believe happened there, and what happens with men with things like pornography, illicit web sites, billboards, and on and on.
James 1: 13 When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; 14 but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. 15 Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.
• That’s what happened to David. When you read Ecclesiastes I believe the same is true of Solomon. He too at this point is in those mid-life crisis years and he is denying his eyes nothing, both from the immoral to the decadent.
But it’s not confined to men in the 30’s to 60’s
Paul admonishes Timothy in II Tim. 2:22 - Run from anything that stimulates youthful lusts. Instead, pursue righteous living, faithfulness, love, and peace. Enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts
• This whole visual thing begins very early in life: From the transition of thinking girls have cooties to the suddenly realizing the shape of the girls they are around.
And Society today – Feeds that, from every angle. Kids as young as 4 or 5 are dressed in provocative clothing.
Ladies please hear me here, I’m not asking you to wear Burkas or Sackcloth but I am asking you to hear what the one brother said in the video. He said “The temptation towards lust “ does not stop.”
• It’s Continual aggressive, does all it can to lead men down to death.
Serial Killer Ted Bundy: Right before he was put to death he sat with Dr. James Dobson and tried to explain how he got where he was. Out of the thousands of journalists that he could have done his last interview the day before they put him to death, he chose Dr. Dobson to get the message out.
I’m not pulling an Adam here. I’m not saying God its these horrible tempting women you gave us.
I’m saying Men you must be like Job and say to God in Job 31:1 "I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl.
Over and over in scripture are these warnings these admonitions and they are all addressed to men. God was plainly crying out the danger, the warning. “ DON’T GO THERE”
MATTHEW 5:28 Jesus warns the men, But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. ( Looks on, visual.)
You must do everything within your power to not go down the trail of lust that will take the best of us down.
But I am saying sisters you can help us. You cannot be conformed to this world and its example of what is proper and ok.
8 I desire then that in every place the men should pray, lifting holy hands without anger or quarreling; 9 likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, with what is proper for women who profess godliness.
As the video said, help us deter the goal of lust in our lives. We can’t change the way the world does business unless we show them a relationship with the Lord that is clear and real.
I remember when I was first saved an issue similar to this came up:
My response was don’t try to bind me because your weak. And I’m going to be honest I am aware that would be a very easy attitude for the ladies to grab this morning.
But Paul was quite clear in his writing to Timothy - women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, with what is proper for women who profess godliness.
But ladies where I really appeal to you is from my heart. I wouldn’t take from anyone here anything that God was ok with, or that didn’t have the potential to stumble another, but I am just being honest from the heart there are things that can be worn, or not worn that have the potential to cause a brother in Christ to stumble.
I have a vivid memory from a district council probably 8 or 9 years ago where a woman was called forward to sing a special. And she wore a dress that was slit all the way up the side. Every time she moved her one leg forward a clear flash was exposed of ankle to panties.
Being as transparent as I can be, I know that because the first two steps I saw that leg before the warning mechanism kicked in to stop looking. But what I saw following that disturbed me more. I watched as she walked up the aisle and head after head of preachers turned to see that leg flashed. And when she arrived at the platform even some on the platform momentarily seemed fixated on it.
You see for men, that’s a daily battle. Fearfully wonderfully made, and nothing wrong with the design, but it’s with who we let that design operate with.
And we need your help. I’m not going to ask for a show of hands this morning but I’m going to guarantee that a large majority of men in this room know exactly what I’m talking about.
In Romans 14 Paul touched on the spirit of what I am saying.
1 Accept the one whose faith is weak, without quarreling over disputable matters. 2 One person’s faith allows them to eat anything, but another, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables. 3 The one who eats everything must not treat with contempt the one who does not, and the one who does not eat everything must not judge the one who does, for God has accepted them.
Make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister. 15 If your brother or sister is distressed because of what you eat, you are no longer acting in love. Do not by your eating destroy someone for whom Christ died..
19 Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification. 20 Do not destroy the work of God for the sake of food. All food is clean, but it is wrong for a person to eat anything that causes someone else to stumble. 21 It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or to do anything else that will cause your brother or sister to fall.
22 So whatever you believe about these things keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the one who does not condemn himself by what he approves.
He reaffirms that in I Cor. 8 : 9 Be careful, however, that the exercise of your rights does not become a stumbling block to the weak. 10 For if someone with a weak conscience sees you, with all your knowledge, eating in an idol’s temple, won’t that person be emboldened to eat what is sacrificed to idols? 11 So this weak brother or sister, for whom Christ died, is destroyed by your knowledge. 12 When you sin against them in this way and wound their weak conscience, you sin against Christ. 13 Therefore, if what I eat causes my brother or sister to fall into sin, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause them to fall.
This is a difficult time of the year for men. The men in the world don’t mind. Their thoughts are carnal, so that the more you show the more they like. The very reason the topless bars are so prevalent in this area. And it’s easy to say hey I’m not doing any of that, but I appeal to you from my heart to consider what you wear or maybe don’t wear that might cause anyone to stumble.
We can’t undo eternity if we come up short, and as Mark said we don’t want to stumble anyone. It would be better to have a millstone tied around our neck and be tossed into the sea.
Men let me close with reminding you that even if 100% of the women today ignored this message you would still be accountable to God for your reactions, responses, etc. Men I call you today to a commitment to covenant with God and with your eyes to not look where you shouldn’t or at what you shouldn’t.
Ladies it’s a difficult wording here. Some of you have dressed modestly all your life or at least since you got saved.
Some have continued at times to wear things that for lack of better words had the ability to cause a man to look where he shouldn’t.
Some may have done it on purpose because you like the attention, others did it out of a variety of different reasons, not all bad but definitely lacking in understanding the consequences to men.
Let me just say if you find yourself often thinking what’s that guy looking at, it might be a good time to review what you are wearing.
Listen I’m not here to close line what you wear, but to appeal as scripture does to dress modestly, in a manner pleasing to the Lord.
ALTAR CALL
For the most part the church serves as a sanctuary from the barrage of a steady stream of temptation towards sin
