(Based on a message preached at First Baptist Church, Chamois, MO on June 18, 2023; but this is not an exact transcription).
Introduction: It’s good to see you this morning, and I hope each one of us remembers our fathers today. My own dad went to Heaven in 2018 but for the last several years of his life, we had a kind of tradition on Father’s Day. Sometimes I’d call him and sometimes he’d call me but it didn’t matter; we always wished each other a “happy pappy day!”
Of course, the Bible doesn’t mention Father’s Day, as a holiday or any other day. Even so, there are a number of things for and about fathers so let’s take a look at some of these. We’ll start with a passage in the Old Testament that gives fathers some basic instructions and go from there.
Text, Deuteronomy 6:4-9, NASV: 4 “Hear, O Israel! The LORD is our God, the LORD is one! 5 And you shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. 6 And these words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart; 7 and you shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way and when you lie down, and when you rise up. 8 And you shall also bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontals on your forehead. 9 And you shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”
<Opening prayer>
1 Expectations for fathers
Now, when we take another look at this passage, one of the first things I see is the expectation that men, especially fathers, were to train their children in the Word of God. Something we forget is that even though at least some people could write, there didn’t seem to be too much that was written. Sometime after this, Joshua wrote a copy of the Law on stones in Canaan but he had the stones plastered over and then wrote on the new surface, so to speak (compare Deuteronomy 27:1-7 with Joshua 8:30-34). True, the men of Israel were commanded to write portions of the Law, at the very least, on their doorposts and gates. The sad thing is that there is no record anyone of Israel ever did this. Their history might have been a lot different if they had!
That’s just as true for us, too. Of course we don’t need to write portions of Scripture on doorposts or gates—some of us don’t have gates! But we do have the entire Word of God, all 66 Books of God’s Holy Word and, you know, it would do us all a lot of good to READ the thing. I mean, what good is it if we don’t take time and actually READ the Word!
We might be a lot better off is we did! Do you hear the voice of experience here?
By the time of the New Testament, the expectations changed a little—but only a little. Remember that a lot of the New Testament, including Paul’s letters, was written for non-Jewish background (or, pagans) believers. Take a look at some of the literature of Greece and Rome and be glad you didn’t live back then! I’m sure glad I didn’t! One of the greatest commandments for Christian fathers was to not exasperate their children—surely, none of us would do that, now, would we? I mean, getting a child so upset they do something wrong, and then punish them for doing it—when the father got the whole thing started? That’s what Paul was trying to communicate in those passages. There’s more and I encourage all of us to read these letters—and heed those messages, too.
Now of course there are other expectations for fathers, too. Think about it: he’s supposed to work like a dog, and still play like a puppy (Play with me, daddy!); he’s supposed to be devoted to his family and still hang out with his friends (if he has any); and he’s supposed to help around the house whether his wife likes the effort or not.
And on top of that, he’s supposed to be the spiritual leader of the home.
It ain’t easy, guys.
No, some men find it easy to find a willing female to have his child or children. Out of wedlock births are still high even though abortion rates are still high too. But producing a baby does not make a man a real father. He’s got to be committed to the mother—by marriage, ideally—and in for the long haul, to use a figure of speech, to raise those children for God. Praise the Lord for the many fathers who have done this, and I pray others would step up and be Godly fathers too.
2 Enemies of fathers
I’ll warn you, though, that any man who wants to be a Godly father will face some enemies. First, remember that the world system has never been kind to godly fathers. Think about this, too, that if a man disciplines his child, he’s being mean; but if he doesn’t, then he’s not “being a good father”, whatever that’s supposed to mean. If he has to work late, he’s not “being there” for his family but if he doesn’t and loses his job, he didn’t try hard enough. Get the idea? I could list more but for now, let’s face the facts that men in general and fathers in particular are facing some well-organized enemies.
And most men either can’t or don’t know how to resist or even fight back against this. Wives, children: the father figure in your home needs all the help he can get. Please support him with all you can give—he needs it, whether he admits it or not!
But a little more soberly, men who want to become Christian fathers are facing a very serious enemy. What is he going to do if there are not enough Christian girls willing to become wives and mothers? Now, we know some Christian men and women who do have the gift of singleness. We understand that and we’re not talking about that. But if Christian girls don’t marry and have children to raise up in the faith, then where is the next generation of believers going to come from? We aren’t exactly packing them in, of any age, (and not very many other churches are doing this, either) and if we don’t have more young people becoming believers in Jesus, we’re sunk, humanly speaking.
And don’t get me started on the evils that are staring our children and grandchildren in the face. Again, if we stand up against it, we’re risking the wrath of various authorities; but if we don’t, then we get criticized for “not ‘doing something’ and fighting back.
Oh yes, there are enemies, and I’m only discussing a few, but every Christian father can take comfort in this—he’ll be rewarded by the Lord one day for all the good he’s done for his family. Our Lord knows and sees everything and He knows when a man is a good father, and also when he is not. Be advised.
3 Evaluations for any Christian father
Now with all of this in mind, being a father has one of the toughest jobs in the world. I mean, how will he know just what his children turn out to be? He sees them as babies, then as toddlers and preschoolers, eventually as students, and ultimately adults themselves. He probably gets inklings of what they—his children—might like to do (or not), but again he has the burden of wondering what kind of adults they’ll turn out to be.
It goes without saying that some fathers will have the heartache of seeing their children reject the faith of their father and accept the faith of some other religion or system. Had David lived longer, he would have no doubt been grieved beyond measure to see Solomon leave the worship of David’s God to worship the idols of the foreign women he married. Think, too, of the kings of Judah—all of Israel, the northern tribes, were bad—seeing the crown prince worship any number of pagan deities. The pain of seeing a child reject the True God is something any father would have a hard time to overcome.
But then, there’s the joy of seeing a child—all of his children—become believers in Jesus! There’s a song from the mid-70’s and has this as some of the lyrics: “To know that tiny feet walk in the path, that I have left behind/and they will make their way to Jesus/contentment there to find”—and “that’s worth everything!” And it surely is!
So take heart, Christian fathers! You’re going to face expectations—real, incredible, and unattainable—but simply honor God and raise your children for God as best you can. Will there be enemies? You better believe it, but with the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ you and your children can overcome them. And the final evaluation, seeing your children become believers in Jesus and seeing them serve Him, I’m telling you, there’s nothing greater in the world.
May the Lord help all of us to be the best fathers we can be. Happy Fathers’ Day, everyone!
Scripture quotations taken from the New American Standard Version of the Bible (NASV)
