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A true story: a missionary was under house arrest in China when soldiers came one day and said, “You can return to America.” As he and his wife were celebrating, the soldiers added, “But you can only take 200 pounds with you.”
They had lived there for several years with their two children, so it was difficult to decide which possessions they would take with them. They used scales and began weighing and debating what to take and what to leave. There was a vase his wife loved, and Glenn didn’t want to part with his new typewriter, or certain books. And what about the kids’ favorite things? They finally came to a total of 200 pounds, before a soldier came back and asked, “Ready to go?”
“Yes,” they replied.
“Did you weigh everything?”
“Yes. 200 pounds.”
“Did you weigh the kids?”
“No!” they answered, surprised.
“Weigh the kids.”
In that instant, everything else they were treasuring suddenly became virtually worthless. They realized that the gift of their children was infinitely more precious than any material blessings in their lives. Those God-given bonds of love are so much of what makes life worth living. It would be impossible to overstate their value.
It’s also significant that he New Testament is full of close family relationships among the early Christians:
Even from the very beginning, we’re told that Mary and Elizabeth were “relatives” (Luke 1:36), meaning that Jesus and John the Baptist were likewise related, possibly as cousins. That adds another layer of human connectivity to the story. God chose the context of family relationships as a foundational element of Christ’s life and ministry.
There were also three pairs of brothers among the twelve apostles: James and John, Peter and Andrew, and James the Lesser and Thaddeus (also known as Jude). Half of the apostles were brothers! That tells us something important about the interweaving of family into the fabric of the church from the very beginning.
After Christ’s death and resurrection James, the Lord’s half-brother, became the leader of the church in Jerusalem. He may well have had a special relationship with Jesus, an intimate knowledge and brotherly love that gave him a greater sense of spiritual authority.
And even the Apostle Paul, not normally considered a family man, greets no fewer than six of his relatives in closing his letter to the Romans (vv. 16:7,11,21).
It seems clear that the strong bond of family relationships was a vital factor in the formative years of the church. And those same close ties remain just as crucial in the church today. In fact, God, in his wisdom and goodness, has designed families as the primary channels of life and love in the world. Families are a model of what Jesus wants the church to become, a place of intimate, loving relationships that exist to bless the world through their life-giving nature.
In this account, Jesus is inviting his followers into that same kind of intimacy. “Here are my mother and my brothers,” he said, looking around at his followers. “Whoever does God’s will is my brother and sister and mother.” Jesus is our brother--and he wants us to see one another as God’s family, brothers and sisters who share life and love each other on a deep, intimate level.
We can easily take for granted how this familial language is used throughout the New Testament as the predominant way the apostles address their fellow Christians, as brothers (and sisters), and God’s beloved children. But we would do well to let that truth sink in and become the key to how we relate to one another: intimately and with the same spiritual roots.
One of my sisters once heard a church member call me “Brother Jim,” not language she was familiar with, and later she told me, half-kidding, “But you’re my real brother.” I laughed, but I knew I was also that church member’s “real brother.” And it’s good for us to know that we have a spiritual family that’s just as vital and life-giving as our natural families.
A seminary classmate had the habit of calling everyone “brother,” which a friend suspected was only to avoid learning our names. I liked it, though, since it always reminded me of our relationship as true brothers in Christ. And believe it’s pleasing to Jesus for us to remember our very real spiritual kinship in the church.
Families are a gift of God to us, given both for sharing the joys and celebrations of life--and to help and love one another through the hard times. As Paul wrote to the Romans, “rejoice with those who rejoice; and mourn with those who mourn,” (v. 12:15). Jesus created the Church as the spiritual family we all need on our faith journey. And just as strong families are the building blocks of a healthy society, our spiritual families are equally foundational to living a richer life in the Kingdom of God.
The sanctuary of a university chapel was full of worshipers on the last Sunday before the Christmas holidays. After the ushers collected the offering, the campus chaplain received the plates at the chancel rail, and said, “This is the last time we’ll all be together here until after the holidays. Some of you are wondering how you’ll be able to afford the cost of your travel. Others are retired or living on modest incomes and might struggle to afford a traditional Christmas dinner. And some are couples with young families who may be wondering where you’ll find the money to buy gifts.”
“It’s good for us to remember that the church is a spiritual family, and that we’re all brothers and sisters in Christ. So, let’s pass the plates again, and those of you in need, please take whatever you will help you. It’s given freely and in love by your family. And others might want to put a little more in, as a blessing. Let’s celebrate the church as the family of God.”
The ushers were momentarily thrown off by this, as was everyone else. There was a solemn hush in the sanctuary, and tears flowed as some worshipers took money from the plates, and others gave more. As Galatians 6:10 says, “As we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.” Families are meant to love and care for one another first and foremost, to provide the basis for sharing love with others.
Many of us love the classic hymn “Blest Be the Tie that Binds.” Its composer, an Englishman named John Fawcett, lived during the 1700’s. He had a very hard early life, born into poverty and orphaned at age twelve. After becoming a Christian at sixteen, he eventually received his own call to pastoral ministry.
John served for seven years as the rector of a poor, rural congregation before being invited to lead a larger, wealthier congregation in London. He and his family could finally have lived more comfortably, and it seemed like a providential opportunity. He accepted their call, but on his last Sunday, after preaching his farewell sermon, with all their possessions packed onto a wagon outside the church, John’s wife told him that she just couldn’t bear to part from that congregation they had come to love so dearly. He realized that he shared her feelings, and they decided to stay, continuing to serve that humble parish for the next 47 years. John wrote the lyrics of his most famous hymn to honor those strong “ties that bind,” and they’ve inspired generations of Christians ever since. Let’s take them to heart and commit to living our own intimately loving relationships with our spiritual brothers and sisters:
Blest be the tie that binds
our hearts in Christian love;
the fellowship of kindred minds
is like to that above.
Before our Father's throne
we pour our ardent prayers;
our fears, our hopes, our aims are one,
our comforts and our cares.
We share our mutual woes,
our mutual burdens bear,
and often for each other flows
the sympathizing tear.
When we are called to part,
it gives us inward pain;
but we shall still be joined in heart,
and hope to meet again.
This glorious hope revives
our courage by the way;
while each in expectation lives
and waits to see the day.
From sorrow, toil, and pain,
and sin, we shall be free;
and perfect love and friendship reign
through all eternity.
Amen.
