There are two God ordained institutions. The first is the church that Jesus Christ instituted. The second is marriage and family established by God at the Garden of Eden. We need to support Christian marriages and Christian families. The church should see as a goal to establish strong Christian families.
A fulfilling happy marriage is the longing of most Christian singles. A fulfilling marriage with deep relationship intimacy where a couple shares their joys and victories, through sickness and health fulfills a deep inner need.
The church needs to uphold the importance of marriage, family and God’s plan for each of these. We are leading couples to take their marriage vows and we need to keep before us how important strong Christian marriages and strong Christian families are. To begin this passage of Ephesians let’s look at the instruction for husbands.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. (Ephesians 5:25-30)
The supreme duty of the husband is that he loves his wife. The word here for love, among all the words for love is the highest form of unconditional agape love. The darker the world’s view toward marriage and family, the more we need to shine our light in Christ with marriage and family that honor God. Our witness for Christ will not be better than our home life.
Strong Christian families are important in and of themselves, but beyond that as testimony to attract a lost and hurting broken world to Christ. People want to know if following Christ makes a difference. If our faith in Christ can impact all of our life, but none more than our family life. People will see in our family that honors Christ that Jesus makes a big difference in our lives.
Right away this becomes a testimony to how Christ makes a difference in our lives. That difference comes most distinctly when husbands obey this command to love their wives as Christ as much as they love themselves. Jacob worked seven years for Rachael and then another seven after he was deceived. The years seemed to him like days because of the love that he loved her.
One young couple was struggling in their marriage because of no communication. Both of them made a commitment to Christ and then they were exhausted they were up late in the night talking and sharing. Christ made a difference in their marriage. They were shining their light. I expect that all who knew them that something changed. It was Christ in the relationship.
The supreme duty of the husband is to love his wife. With this agape love the husband is not thinking what he gets from the marriage, but what he gives to his wife. Husband, if you do not love your wife you are disobeying God. If you are disobeying God you are living in sin. If you are living in sin you are destroying your family. I would say if husbands would submit to Christ and love their wives as they love themselves the rest of family life would fall into place 95% of the time.
Not only are husbands to love their wife as they love themselves, which is very high love, but more than that, to love your wife as Christ loved the church. When we love like Christ loved the church it means thinking nothing of yourself. Although the Ephesians 5 passage the illustration of how Christ loved the church is interwoven to the point we sometimes don’t know which one Paul is talking about.
Just as I was writing this I stopped to read a chapter of Mary Geegh’s book, God Guides.
https://god-guides.com/product/god-guides/
The story was told of a couple who separated because they were filled with bitterness to one another. But they listened to God and he transformed their marriage. She titled that story from gloom to glory.
Husband, if you are walking with the Lord and love your wife like you love yourself, get ready for your own gloom to glory story. It means you love the Lord and your wife more than your work or any of your hobbies.
One more verse husbands. Look at Ephesians 5:21, Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. You and your wife submit one to another.
Keep in mind too that verse 21 says that you and your wife submit to each other. Keep that in thought as you look to what this passage says about the wife submitting to her husband. Every Christian must learn submission. Submission is used more than twenty times in Paul’s letters.
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. (Ephesians 5:22-24)
There is not a long list of requirements listed for the wife. There is just one, wives submit to your husbands. This is not a demeaning submission. This is a respectful submission.
The husband has a place of leadership and authority in the home. The wife should submit in love and in respect for her husband. Disrespect will damage the relationship.
The New Testament teaches spiritual equality Galatians 3:28. The responsibility of leadership is with the husband and the father.
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— 3 “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.” 4 Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. (Ephesians 6:1-4)
Attention parents: your investment in your family will be the most important thing you ever do in ministry! Investing in your children should be your highest priority.
If you have three children who walk with the Lord and have strong Christian marriages and they each have three children and those nine couples have strong Christian marriages and they each have three children and those twenty-seven great grandchildren have strong Christian marriages and etc. in a 2 Timothy 2:2 pattern. Then your influence for generations to come will be more than anything else you can do in your life.
Children obey your parents. We want to nurture young children to obey their parents. We want middle age children to care for their aging parents. This is our opportunity to shine our light for Christ. Why be a ministry workaholic and ignore your children. It family is our most important stewardship in our lives.
We love our children. We nurture the Christian faith of our children. We pray for the future mate of our children. We pray for the future generations of our children. We need to be regularly praying for the marriages of our children and the grandchildren and great grandchildren that are not born yet.
This is your greatest opportunity in life to invest in your families. Pray for all you know to have strong Christian families that honor God.
