A. Philemon 4-7 (READ)
1. We live in a SOCIETY that KNOWS little about FORGIVENESS. We live in a SOCIETY that CARES
little about FORGIVENESS.
a. In fact, I would think that one of the major CONTRIBUTORS—if not the major contributor—to the
DESTRUCTION of RELATIONSHIPS in our culture is the ABSENCE of FORGIVENESS.
b. Our culture PUSHES us to be UNFORGIVING. It CELEBRATES and EXALTS people who are
not willing to FORGIVE.
COMMENT:
We make HEROES out of POLITICIANS who mercilessly BOMBAST everyone who doesn’t AGREE with THEM . . . and US. We CHEER on the MOB MENTALITY of those who hit the STREETS with SIGNS promoting our VIEWS and spewing hateful CATCHPHRASES against those
that we DETEST.
We LAUGH when POLICEMEN have WATER poured on them. We JOIN IN when RACIAL SLURS and DISGUSTING NAMES are used to DESCRIBE those who are DIFFERENT from ourselves. We go along with the DECEPTIVE LIES told about others because it PROMOTES our
AGENDA.
c. As a result of the sinfulness, the wickedness, and the lack of any kind SOCIAL RESTRAINT in our CULTURE, we have a society filled with BITTERNESS, filled with VENGEANCE, filled with ANGER, filled with HATE, filled with HOSTILITY toward others.
2. Even HUMANISTIC PHYCOLOGY tells us that it’s not HEALTHY to FORGIVE.
a. There is a book written by Susan Forward entitled “TOXIC PARENTS” that contains a chapter
with the title: “You Don’t Have To Forgive.” (THAT’S NOT WHAT GOD SAYS!)
b. It’s all about SHIFTING the BLAME for your PROBLEMS and the POOR DECISIONS that you make, onto your PARENTS. Since it’s their FAULT, you don’t have to take RESPONSIBILITY for your LIFE.
3. Now, for a Christian, the REFUSAL to FORGIVE is UNTHINKABLE.
a. I don’t care what the ISSUE is or what the OFFENSE is, a REFUSAL to FORGIVE is a blatant, open
act of DISOBEDIENCE.
b. When Paul wrote to the Colossian church (the same church that met in Philemon’s house), he commanded them to . . . “Bear with each other and forgive WHATEVER grievances you may
have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you”- Colossians 3:13.
COMMENT:
Now, if there was anyone who had a reason to be UNFORGIVING, it would be Paul. Because of His FAITH in Christ and BOLD TEACHING of God’s Word, he had people to ruthlessly ATTACK him both physically and verbally from ALL SIDES—Jews, Gentiles, and even some so-called Christians. And, yet, he writes: “…forgive whatever grievances you may have against another.”
B. This brings us to the LETTER that Paul wrote Philemon.
1. Remember, Philemon was a Christian SLAVE-OWNER who lived in the small town of Colossae.
a. He had a slave named Onesimus who apparently STOLE MONEY from him and RAN AWAY to Rome where, it just so happens, he comes in contact with Paul who is under HOUSE ARREST.
b. Paul takes this opportunity to SHARE with Onesimus the GOSPEL, and he ACCEPTS Christ as His
Lord and Savior. (Sometimes it takes someone on the outside to bring our loved ones to Christ.)
2. Paul, realizing how IMPORTANT it is for Onesimus to RECONCILE with Philemon, urges him to
RETURN to his Master’s house in Colossae.
a. Paul writes this personal letter to Philemon (which Onesimus is going to hand-deliver), urging “him to FORGIVE Onesimus and ACCEPT him back into his home not as a SLAVE, but as a
BROTHER in Christ”- vv. 15-16.
b. Paul is confident that Philemon will FORGIVE and ACCEPT Onesimus, because of two GODLY
ATTRIBUTES that the Apostle sees in him, and is found in every FORGIVING PERSON.
MESSAGE:
I. PHILEMON WAS A FAITHFUL FOLLOWER OF JESUS CHRIST- v. 5
A. We read in v. 19 that “Paul was the one who brought Philemon to Christ.”
1. Philemon wasn’t a Christian by NAME only. He was a man of God who faithfully served his Lord.
a. Paul described him as a “fellow worker”- v. 1.
ILLUSTRATION:
Have you ever been asked to write a CHARACTER REFERENCE for someone that you didn’t know all that well? As a PREACHER, I am asked often. And when asked, I’m going to be truthful: “I see him at church about twice a year, and . . . he seems friendly. Yours Truly.”
COMMENT:
Paul worked ALONGSIDE Philemon in his MINISTRY. He knew him PERSONALLY. He knew his CHARACTER and what kind of MAN he was. And Paul had such an ADMIRATION for Philemon, that he said, “I always thank God as I remember you in my prayers…”- v. 4.
b. “The church met in his home”- v. 2.
COMMENT:
There were no CHURCH BUILDINGS during this time, so Christians would gather in a central location—usually in one or more of the members’ homes. Apparently, Philemon had a
home large enough for the Colossian church to meet.
He knew how important it was for the CHURCH to gather regularly for WORSHIP and the STUDY God’s Word, and to FELLOWSHIP with one another.
2. This letter to Philemon is not a REPRIMAND, but a COMMENDATION.
COMMENT:
There is nothing in Paul’s LETTER that leads us to BELIEVE that Philemon will ALLOW the HURT and HUMILIATION that Onesimus has brought upon him and his family through his
sinful BEHAVIOR, to HINDER his willingness to FORGIVE.
Believe me, Paul had no difficulty in TELLING people like it is. If he thought for one moment that Philemon would absolutely REFUSE to FORGIVE Onesimus, the Apostle would have called him out for his DISOBEDIENCE.
B. Being a FOLLOWER of Jesus Christ is the main REASON that Philemon will be able to FORGIVE!
1. FORGIVING Onesimus and ACCEPTING him back as a BROTHER was not a EASY thing.
a. Just to take him back as a SLAVE would be SCANDALOUS, even if he was given a SUITABLE PUNISHMENT.
COMMENT:
Most SLAVE OWNERS, especially those who were non-Christians, would severely BEAT the RUNAWAY and then BRAND him as a FUGITIVE before SELLING him off to a LABOR
FARM. Others would just have him KILLED.
b. But to FORGIVE Onesimus and WELCOME him into his HOME as a BROTHER, would go
against all SOCIAL NORMS of the day.
COMMENT:
Philemon would probably find himself on the OUTSIDE amongst his PEERS. Undoubtedly, SLAVE OWNERS would be concerned that it might EMBOLDEN their SLAVES to do something similar. Whatever good standing Philemon would have in the COMMUNITY, would be damaged.
2. But through it all, Philemon’s FAITH in Jesus will ultimately LEAD him to do the RIGHT THING.
a. He knows what it is like to be hopelessly LOST in SIN and held in BONDAGE by Satan, “the
prince of this world.”
b. He knows the SACRIFICE that Jesus made to REDEEM him—to PURCHASE him with His precious BLOOD that was SHED on the CROSS.
3. And, now, he too, has an opportunity to DEMONSTRATE the CHARACTER of God in a way that will be very COSTLY to himself—but, in the end, will be WORTH it.
C. We have all been HURT by someone . . . and we have all HURT someone.
1. Just because we are Christians doesn’t EXEMPT us from HURTING OTHERS.
COMMENT:
We MISUNDERSTAND people. We SECOND GUESS each other. We make the WRONG ASSUMPTIONS about one another. We GOSSIP about each other and PRESUME we KNOW the MOTIVES of one another.
You may KNOW of some Christians—maybe onetime members of this CHURCH—who NO LONGER speak to one another because one or both were HURT by the other. I personally know of some CHURCHES that have split in HALF because of HURT.
2. HURT is inevitable, even in the Lord’s CHURCH—even among FAMILY.
a. Why do you think the Bible talks so much about “LOVING one another” and “FORGIVING
one another”?
b. When the HURT comes, we need to be REMINDED (even as Paul is reminding Philemon), that we are FOLLOWERS of Jesus Christ who TOOK our place on the CROSS so that through
Him God will FORGIVE us of all the TERRIBLE things that we have DONE against Him.
c. And if God can FORGIVE us, then most certainly we can FORGIVE one another.
II. PHILEMON WAS A MAN WHO LOVED ALL THE SAINTS- vv. 5, 7
A. Reading through the book of Colossians, we get a GLIMPSE into what the CHURCH that met in
Philemon’s HOME looked like.
1. The Colossian church was made up of both Gentiles and Jews, with the MAJORITY being Gentiles.
- Colossian 3:11- “Here there is no Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian or Scythian (uncivilized GYPSIES—the NOMADS of the day), slave or free, but Christ is all and in all.”
2. It is also believed that since Paul addresses both “Masters and Slaves”, it is likely that SLAVES
and SLAVE OWNERS worshiped together in Philemon’s home.
- Listen to how Paul addresses them in Colossians 3:22-4:1 (READ and COMMENT)
B. So, when Paul COMMENDED Philemon for his “love for ALL the saints”, that would include
Christian SLAVES along with everyone else.
1. Philemon was not a HARD-HEARTED, INSENSITIVE, UNCARING man.
a. He, being a GENTILE, did not diminish the LOVE that he had for his JEWISH brethren.
b. He, being WEALTHY, didn’t cause him to LOOK DOWN on others and think himself BETTER.
c. He, being a SLAVE OWNER, did not hinder him from treating the Christian SLAVES who
worshipped in his home with equal RESPECT and VALUE that he extended to everyone else.
ILLUSTRATION:
When I visited my brother John in Naples, Italy where he was stationed in the Air Force in May of 1991, I had the opportunity to preach for a MILITARY congregation. Even though there were COLONELS, MAJORS, and CAPTAINS worshipping with SERGEANTS, SEAMEN, and AIRMEN, you would have never guessed it.
They LOVED and FELLOWSHIPPED one another as if there were no DIFFERENCES between them. As I entered the assembly there was a sign that read: THERE ARE NO RANKS IN THE BODY OF CHRIST, ONLY FAMILY!
2. Paul takes it a step further by saying that “Philemon refreshed the hearts of the saints”- v. 7.
a. This PAINTS such a beautiful PICTURE of Philemon.
b. The LOVE that Philemon has for his fellow-Christians regardless of their BACKGROUND,
RACE, or SOCIAL STANDING, has been REFRESHING to the church at Colossae.
c. The Greek word Paul uses for “refreshed” is “a military term that speaks of an army resting
from a long, exhausting march.”
COMMENT:
Apparently, members of the Colossian church who had been STRUGGLING, SUFFERING, and HURTING in one way or another were REFRESHED by Philemon’s LOVE and CARE for them. He brought REST and RENEWAL to their HEARTS and SOUL.
ILLUSTRATION:
When a person is engaged in CONFLICT with another person, it can sometimes feel like WAR. However, when one encounters a FORGIVING Christian, it is like RESTING after a weary
BATTLE. It is utterly REFRESHING, and one is enabled to RELAX in the PRESENCE of such a
PERSON. And, according to Paul, Philemon WAS that person.
CONCLUSION:
A. I began this lesson by stating: “We live in a society that KNOWS and CARES little about
FORGIVENESS.”
1. Last week we saw the amazing VIDEO of 18-year-old Brandt Jean extending FORGIVENESS to the
Dallas Police Officer who senselessly SHOT and KILLED his older brother Botham.
a. The officer was convicted of second-degree murder and sentenced to 10 years in prison.
b. At her sentencing, Brandt told Officer Guyger that he FORGAVE her, and then gave her HUG.
2. That video has gone VIRAL and has been seen by people all over the WORLD.
a. And, it has been WELL-RECEIVED for the most part.
b. But there are groups of people who are extremely ANGRY and OFFENDED by what Brandt did.
ILLUSTRATION:
A pastor of a prominent BLACK CHURCH in Washington DC described Brandt’s act of forgiveness as a symptom of what he dubbed “Post Traumatic SLAVERY Syndrome.” In other
words, the FORGIVENESS that Brandt extended is the result of an EMOTIONAL DISORDER.
Others have said that “it served to soothe white people’s conscience.” They added: “White America has practically come to expect black people to forgive when violence is done to them. Too often the public acts as if black people are not entitled to express anger, even when there is
ample reason to be upset.”
COMMENT:
Believe me, the JEAN FAMILY has every reason to be ANGRY at that POLICE OFFICER for taking their son and brother’s LIFE. But the people who are UPSET with Brandt Jean’s act of
forgiveness MISS the point, all together.
It was not because Brandt is EMOTIONALLY disturbed or because he is BLACK and the police officer is a WHITE FEMALE that he felt COMPELLED to extend FORGIVENESS, but only because he is a CHRISTIAN who was following the very example of his Lord Jesus Christ when He hung on the CROSS and looked at the very people who put Him there and said, “Father, forgive them….”
